I lied.

Often, what I said I’d do and what really happened would change along the way without my control. If I were smart, I wouldn’t have gone back to her. But since I was a man and often controlled by my dick, I gave in.

Days later, Max shot me a text asking if I’d give her another shot. She missed me, missed my cock, and wanted to see me again. Like an idiot and a man with a cock, I took her back.

It wasn’t that we didn’t have issues. If we avoided talk of anything that resembled a relationship, everything was smooth sailing. I dropped any thought of taking her to Sunday dinner. We decided that it would be best to keep our visits short, with no wining and dining beforehand. I knew she didn’t want to take a chance of someone seeing us.

I knew what it looked like to an outsider. Anthony was pussy-whipped, just like every other Gallo man. There was a bit of truth to the statement, but I would argue my side until the bitter end. I couldn’t allow myself to be seen as weak.

I liked to think of myself like a caveman. Max was my prey and I was just waiting to pounce. Eventually, she’d give in. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, I knew she liked me. I’d bet my fortune that her feelings were closer to love than just mere lust.

I’d wait. Be the patient man I’d never been before and wait for Max to admit what she felt for me. The biggest hurdle would be to overcome the fact that her family didn’t approve of me. I was sure that, if they got to know me, no matter what color I am, they’d fall in love. If I could just get the chance to show her that we could work and I could get her family’s blessing…

But it wouldn’t happen overnight. I’d play the part, be her fuck buddy. Be anything she wanted to be until she felt comfortable enough to utter the words I’d always thought I’d be too big of a pussy to say.

Not too long ago, I’d thought relationships were for the weak. Slowly, I evolved. It’d only taken thirty-something years for it to happen. My luck would be that the one woman I finally wanted to chance something more with shut me out. I’d hang on, take what she had to give, and always leave her wanting more.

But eventually, we each have a breaking point.

We usually met up at night when we could find the time in our busy schedules, and I remained in the shadows. It was the lot I’d resigned myself to when I’d begged her to give me a chance that night in her shop, to give us a shot at happiness.

I thought I could handle it, but over time, I wanted to stake my claim and let the world know she was mine. It didn’t take me long to fall in love with Max. The only thing that rivaled her beauty was her attitude. I saw myself when I looked at her. Her cockiness and ability to take shit as it was thrown at her and fling it back in the face of adversity were astonishing. She didn’t let anything or anybody get in her way.

Except her family. They were in the way of our happiness, her happiness, and a possible happily-ever-after. It had been months since she’d caved in and agreed to see me as we tried to figure out what fate had in store for us.

Not only was our lovemaking epic, our fights could only be classified as nuclear. More times than I’d like to admit, she’d kick me out and put an end to our faux-relationship. She’d cave in, saying that she missed me and had fucked up. Like a dumbass, I’d forgive her and take her back.

I had become the weak one. Roles had reversed, and I’d landed in a position I’d never thought I’d be in. Love can make a person do crazy things. I’d said that I never wanted anything to change me, but without stopping it, I had become someone I barely recognized anymore.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered on my lips as she crawled in my lap.

It was about the fifth time she’d called it off and then begged my forgiveness over the last two months. I had come to her house with a plan. I’d fuck her like she’d never been fucked and leave.

Being led by the balls and strung along had been exhausting. It had taken a toll on my music, my work, and my sleep. I was done with feeling like shit. Her moods were too much for me to handle. I wouldn’t be a pawn in her life anymore. I was more than a cock and a secret.

“I can’t do this anymore, Max.” I slumped in the chair and held her hips. “I can’t keep taking you back. I won’t do it again.” I shook my head, unable to comprehend how she had changed me.

“I promise it’ll be different. You just don’t understand what I’m going through, Anthony.” She gripped my shirt, rubbing the material between her thumb and index fingers. “It’s so hard having so much love for you and not knowing how to handle it.”

“What’s to handle? Just feel it and let it happen. Stop running away like a scared child. It’s time to grow the fuck up.” I played with the loop on her jeans, focusing my attention away from the squeezing pain in my chest.

She had ruined me. Totally destroyed the man I had been not that long ago at the Ritz. I had been a cocky motherfucker who had life by the balls. Now a woman was holding mine in a vise. I’d never understood what my brothers had gone through when they had met “the one.” I had ridiculed them and thought they were pussies, but now, I knew. Love wasn’t something you could turn off or deny. It became part of you, an ache so deep and full that it had to be filled to feel alive.

I needed to go to an addiction meeting. I needed to admit to someone outside of my family that I was Anthony Gallo and I had lost my way and needed salvation. I needed redemption from a path so cruel that I was a shell of my former self. I hated Max and myself. Her even more for the hell she’d put me through the last couple of months.

Everything in my life was as fake as Kim Kardashian’s ass on the cover of Paper magazine. I pretended not to have a girlfriend, she hid me from everyone but Malia and Nita, and we ignored the future. Actually, we swept it under the rug, pretending it wasn’t something we’d have to face soon.

She arched forward, pushing her breasts into my chest. “I promise, Anthony. I’ll do better.”

“I deserve better,” I replied. “I’ve become a better man since I’ve known you. I’m a shell of my former self, Max. The asshole you met in the bar deserves how you’re treating me, but the man sitting before you right now…sure as fuck doesn’t.”

“You’re right,” she said as she snaked her arms behind my neck. “I’m sorry. Let me make it up to you, baby.” She gave me a devilish grin that made my cock take notice.

“I like the sound of that.” I smiled at her, feeling an aching in my balls. I’d spent three days without her and felt the loss in more than my heart.

“I can do that special thing you like so much. It’s been a while.” She licked my lips as she reached down and palmed my cock.

“Mmm,” I murmured as I pressed my lips to her mouth, getting lost in her taste. “Kitty Cat,” I whispered into her mouth, “I want you to make me believe that you mean it this time.”

She pulled her lips away and gave me a lopsided smirk. “I can do that,” she promised before she crawled out of my lap, sliding down my legs.

Her fingers fumbled with the button on my jeans. It took her longer than usual to unfasten them.

“Sorry,” she said, glancing up at me. “My fingers don’t want to work.”

I placed my hands on her fingers. “Take your time. I’m in no rush, and it’s not your fingers I care about right now,” I said as I lifted my arms and laced my hands behind my head.

“I’m sure you aren’t.” She smiled as the button popped. “Finally.” She breathed a sigh of relief as she dragged the zipper down.

As she opened my jeans, I lifted my ass for her to drag my pants down, giving my aching cock the freedom it had been demanding.

“So you want…” she said before she licked the head of my cock.

My body vibrated, craving more of the warmth that only her mouth could provide.

“…it slow or fast?” she asked before drawing the tip into her mouth.

I shuddered and lost my breath. As my eyes rolled back, I tried to form words but couldn’t.

“Like this?” She drew my entire length into her mouth, swallowing the head as it hit the back of her throat.

“God,” I moaned as she began to drag my dick back out while pushing her tongue on the underside.

“Mmm,” she hummed with the head, dragging my dick back inside.

The vibrations rocked my world. A white-hot streak of pleasure shot straight to my balls, causing the need to amplify. I didn’t think I could’ve handled slow, no matter how badly I wanted to make the moment last.

The warmth of her mouth mixed with the noises she made had me picturing shit that wouldn’t drive me over the edge. I wanted to watch. Seeing a woman devouring your cock is one of the sexiest things in the world. It plays over and over again in a man’s mind for hours after it happens.

I closed my eyes, shutting out everything but how her mouth felt and her tiny groans as she sucked me off. Her pace was slow as she took her time and paid special attention to the tip. Each time her tongue whirled by my piercings, I lost my breath. The tug of her teeth pulled deep inside my dick. It was the piercing that caused it. I’d picked that type of piercing because it’s the most pleasurable for a man. Even though I cared about the orgasm of whichever woman I was with, ultimately, I wanted mine to be better…more explosive.

Her hand slid from my thigh to my balls as she palmed them. One hand worked my cock with her mouth while the other fondled me. It was perfect and heavenly. When I opened my eyes and stared down at her, an internal struggle began.

Should I fuck her and leave? I wanted to make her feel as shitty as I’d felt over the last few weeks. My head had been spinning from the back-and-forth. How could you profess your love one moment and then do a complete one-eighty and turn cold as ice?

I wound my fingers in her hair and yanked roughly, pulling her mouth off my dick. “Not like this,” I growled as she peered up at me with saliva hanging from her lips.

I tilted forward, licking her mouth clean before kissing her. As I rose to my feet, I brought her with me, my hands firmly planted on her arms. The tiny silk nighty she was wearing didn’t have a chance beneath my hands. I forwent the easier route of letting it fall off her shoulder. It tore from her skin, falling into a heap on the floor.

“Anthony,” she mumbled on my lips.

“Shhh,” I replied. Honestly, I didn’t give a fuck what she thought or how she felt. I wanted to fuck her, and when I walked out the door tomorrow, I wanted her to miss me.

After ripping off my pants, I lifted her and impaled her on my cock. Not working it in gently, making sure she was ready to handle my size. Nope. I slammed her body down over my hardened length, burying myself balls deep inside her.

“Fuck,” she hissed as her pussy clenched.

I pushed her down with more force than the first time. “Feel me?” I asked, repeating the motion.

She clawed at my shoulders as she milked me. “Anthony,” she pleaded as her feet dug into my ass.

I didn’t know if she had been begging me to stop or keep going, but either way, I didn’t relent. I didn’t make love to her like she was my girlfriend. I fucked her like I’d fucked the countless women before she’d wrecked me.

When I looked at her, watching her mouth gasp for air as I battered her with my cock, I reminded myself that she wasn’t the woman I loved. Max had two personalities, and the one fucking me back was the one I hated.

Our bodies crashed into the wall as I tried to get more traction. Resting her body on the wall, I violated her. Pumping into her like a machine, unable to stop myself until I came. Her wet heat surrounded me, milking my dick for more like a greedy bitch.

Her nails tore my skin, causing me to cry out in pain. My grunts melded with hers, sounding like the perfect melody of pleasure. My balls grew heavy, and I felt like the end was near. Without wanting to lose the momentum I had built, I pushed her back harder toward the wall and gripped her under her legs. I pumped, slammed, and fucked her with all the anger that had been pent up inside me for weeks.

She screamed through the pleasure, enjoying every moment of the fucking I was giving her. When I grunted through the last couple of thrusts, my pace became erratic as my dick wept inside of her and I knew it would be the last time I’d feel her from the inside.

“More,” she cried out, riding my cock even though I had stopped moving.

I had no breath left, since I’d given everything I had in the pursuit of my pleasure. I released her, letting her use her body to prop herself up and continue on her carnal quest. Resting my hands on the wall and framing her face, I watched as she bucked, chasing her release.

Through my hard breaths I grinned. She had to work for her pleasure. For the first time since I’d met her, I wasn’t going to make sure she came multiple times. It was a prick move, but she deserved to be left without the satisfaction only I could bring.

Just as her body stiffened and she began to cry out, the doorbell rang.

“Oh my God!” she yelled as her pussy contracted, milking my softening dick.

Clutching my shoulder, she ignored the door and continued to ride me like a fuck toy. It was how she’d treated me lately, so why would this night have been any different?

When her head fell forward, the doorbell rang again.

“Fuck,” she mumbled on top of my shoulder. “I can’t,” she blew out between breaths.

It double rang. Whoever was standing on the other side of the door was persistent.

“Go get dressed and I’ll answer it,” I told her as she slid down my body.

“Okay,” she said as she tried to stand on wobbly legs, swaying slightly. “Whoever it is, tell them to go away.”

“It’s probably some asshole selling something,” I said, picking my pants up and pulling them on as the doorbell chimed again. “Coming. Christ!” I yelled as I zipped up my pants and stalked toward the door with the button left undone. “What?” I barked as I flung open the door and grabbed for my button.

“Um,” a small voice said with a squeak.

My eyes slowly drifted up after seeing a pair of red flats. There were a couple of things I knew in this moment. First off, those were not Nita’s or Malia’s feet. I’d heard them talk about fashion enough to know they would never wear flats. The flowered dress that hung below her knees screamed grandma, or mother at least.

A few weeks before, I might have freaked out, but now I smiled to myself, knowing that Max’s charade would come crumbling down.

My gaze meandered up her body, finally settling on her face. I grinned at her. She was definitely Max’s mother. I stared at her, waiting to hear her screams, but her reaction totally threw me for a loop.

Her eyes scanned over me, taking time to soak in my chest before they met mine. Instead of yelling, she gave me a sinful stare and held out her hand.

“And you are?” she asked with a smooth, sultry voice.

“I’m Anthony,” I said, grasping her hand and placing a small kiss on the delicate flesh lining the top.

“Did you tell them to go away, babe?” Max yelled from the bedroom.

I touched my lips, begging the woman to remain silent. I turned and yelled back, “Yeah. They left, Max.”

“Thank shit. They almost ruined my orgasm.”

I looked back at her mother, and her mouth had dropped open.

“Take your time, love,” I called out.

“Be out in five. I have to put some clothes on.”

“And you are?” I asked the woman, who was still holding my hand.

“I’m Max’s mother, Ruth.” Her smile had transformed into something different. Maybe she was pissed off because I’d just fucked her daughter. No mother, no matter the race, wants to hear that.

“Ruth, I’m surprised you haven’t yelled yet,” I said as I stroked her hand with my thumb.

Her gaze returned to my face for a beat. “Why?”

“Max told me you had a problem with us seeing each other. I know you don’t like that I’m white.”

“What?” she asked as her voice grew shrill.

“You don’t have to deny it, Ruth. I’m just hoping I can change your mind.” I released her hand, letting it drop.

“Baby, I don’t know who filled your head with that nonsense. I never said anything about you being white. In fact, I didn’t know anything about you. I’m not entirely pleased that you just had sex with my baby, but it has nothing to do with the color of your skin.”

My head began to spin. Thoughts swirled in my mind as I tried to piece together what had truly happened. Max had tried to push me away, but when it hadn’t worked, she’d pulled the most visible reason from her bag. Racism. It was dirty and underhanded.

“Maybe she was confused. Maybe she just meant her brother.”

“No, baby. He doesn’t care about color. In fact, his fiancée is a beautiful, redheaded, white woman. I don’t know why Max would say that.”

My stomach started to knot as my chest tightened. The woman in front of me was looking at me like I was the most beautiful creature in the world. Her words were smooth and kind. No malice or trickery as she spoke to me.

Max had lied.

It wasn’t a little lie either. It was the biggest of lies. She’d said it without blinking, making me believe the trash she’d spewed.

“Would you like to come in, Ruth?” I opened the door, stepping out of the way to let her pass. “Sorry. I don’t mean to be rude.”

She nodded, brushing my chest with her bare shoulder as she walked into the house. If it were under different circumstances, I would’ve laughed, but it just made me realize how horrible the lie had been.

As she sat on the couch, adjusting the hem of her dress, I headed to the kitchen. I needed something to deal with the bullshit that would occur when Max saw her mother sitting in the living room.

“Would you like a drink?”

“No. Thank you,” she replied as she gripped her knees.

“I’ll be right back.”

When I opened the cabinet to grab a glass, I heard, “What the…” from the living room and froze. I didn’t want to make a sound and possibly miss what was about to be said.

“Max,” her mother said. “Sit.”

I poured myself a drink and headed back to the living room.

“This fine man,” she said as I walked back in the room and glanced at me, “he said I don’t like him because he’s white. Can you explain this to me?” She glared at her daughter, crossing her arms with her mouth set in a firm line.

“Well, I… I…” she stuttered, glancing between the two of us. “I…”

“Drop the shit, Max. Be truthful with me. Remember, God is listening.”

Not only did the woman have the mother guilt, she had thrown religion in Max’s face. It wasn’t unlike something my mother would do, but when it came from Ruth’s mouth, it sounded direr.

Max sat on the opposite couch and bit her lip. “Mama, I didn’t know what to say.” Max looked down at her hands and knotted them together. “Anthony, can you let me talk to my mother alone, please?”

“No,” I replied as I rested on the wall. “I’m not missing this for the world.” Lifting the glass to my lips, I sipped the Crown, letting it linger in my mouth.

“Please!” Max yelled, and shot me a glare.

“He’s staying,” Ruth said, turning to look at me. Before she looked back toward Max, she threw me a wink.

I grinned behind the cup, feeling a bit better about how the night was unfolding. Although her arrival had tossed a wrench in my plans, I couldn’t have asked for anything better.

“Mother. There are things I don’t want him to know,” Max said.

“It sounds like he knows plenty about you, Maxine,” Ruth replied. “Stop wasting time and tell me why you said I don’t like white people.”

“It’s complicated, Mama.” Her hands unfurled and she reached up, scrubbing her fingers across her face. “I didn’t want to see him. I didn’t want to like him.”

“You used me as an excuse. Why?”

“Because, Mama. I don’t deserve him.” She peered up at me through her fingers. “It’s not fair.”

“Child, life isn’t fair. You’re going to have to get over yourself and figure out what you want in life.”

“I know life isn’t fair. I’m the one living with this shit!” Max yelled as she jumped to her feet. “I’m the one who will never have happiness. Not you, Mama. Me!”

It felt like I had turned a movie on in the middle, having missed something important that clued me the fuck in on what they were talking about.

“Sit,” Ruth commanded. “Do not raise your voice at me. My patience is hanging by a thread right now.”

“I’m sorry,” Max mumbled as she plopped down.

“What?” I asked, still in the dark. “I’m lost.”

Max shook her head, shooting a glare at her mother. “Don’t.”

“Maxine,” her mother said. “You need to stop lying to everyone in your life. Someday, you’re going to look back and regret every minute you wasted with your foolishness.”

“I’m waiting,” I said, taking another drink of Crown. I gripped the glass tighter, feeling my hands begin to shake. The virtual train wreck I’d expected and taken secret joy in watching as it played out was derailing before my eyes.

“I can’t.” Max shook her head, placing her face in her palms.

The one phrase I had always hated to hear her say should’ve been her personal motto. If I never heard the two words again in my life, I’d be a happy man.

“Bullshit,” I muttered into the glass.

“Maxine, look at me,” Ruth said. When Max’s eyes drifted to hers, she began to speak. “Do you love this man?”

Even from across the room, I could see the tears that had collected in her eyes. “I ca—”

“Stop!” Ruth yelled, causing us to jump. “Do. You. Love. Him? It’s real simple, Max. Yes or no.”

She’d told me many times that she loved me. Never had she admitted it to another person. Even when we were with her friends, she’d gloss over the topic and change course.

I didn’t know what I wanted her answer to be. Hearing her tell another soul that she loved me would bring me warmth and joy. The way our relationship had played out—and was in the process of crashing and burning in spectacular fashion—made me want to hear her say no. Could I leave her in the dust if she professed her feelings for me to her own mother?

“Yes,” she confessed through gritted teeth as tears began to trickle down her cheeks.

My stomach dropped, filling with butterflies. Renewed hope and the warmth I had sought flooded me. Even though I wanted to stomp on her heart and show her how painful love could be, I felt happy at her confession.

“Does he love you?” Ruth asked Max like I wasn’t in the room.

“Yes.”

“Then I don’t see what the problem is besides you and your lies.”

“You know what the problem is,” Max bit out as her nostrils flared.

I had had enough. I couldn’t stand by and listen to the two of them bicker in code. “Can someone clue me the fuck in on what’s going on here?” I growled as I pushed off the wall and headed toward Max. “Excuse my language, Ruth,” I added.

“It’s okay, baby. Sometimes it’s the only way to emphasize what we need to say. Tell him, Max, or I will.”

I looked down at Max and saw her trembling. I waited for her to speak.

“I can’t,” she whispered without looking at me. “I can’t be with you anymore, Anthony. I love you, but it’s not right.”

“I think I should be the judge of what’s right for me, Max. Not you. I want to hear that truth.”

“No,” she said. “I won’t.” She gave me a steely glare. Even as the tears streamed down her face, she refused to break.

“That’s it? Everything I’ve been through with you. All the abuse I’ve taken from you and you won’t even tell me what the fuck is going on.”

She shook her head.

“I’m done, Max. I’ve had enough of your bullshit. Believe it or not, I do have feelings.” I turned to face her mother. “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t either.” I stalked over, grabbing my shirt from the floor as I slipped my sandals on.

She jumped to her feet and walked toward me. “Son, wait. You need to know—”

“No, I don’t need to know anything. It doesn’t matter how much I love your daughter. She still shuts me out. I can’t do this anymore.”

Without a second thought or a backward glance, I walked out, leaving her and Ruth to talk. I’d done my part, begged enough for her to share the thing that kept her at arm’s length, but she’d refused. I couldn’t be her pawn in whatever wicked game she was playing.

My time with Max was over.

I stared up at the starry sky as I walked to my car. Everything came crashing down and ended in spectacular fashion.

“Fuck you, Karma!” I yelled as I watched the distant stars twinkle. “You win!”

I headed home, making a vow not to let her have another go at my heart. Max had trampled it to bits, and there was nothing left.

I’d chased her, stalked her as my prey, until she’d caved in and become my trophy.

What happened next would cause my head to spin and have me cursing the gods.

When I found something so pure and real it would be complicated and heartbreaking.

I would be swallowed up, spit out like a mouthful of cum by a two-bit hooker looking for a fix, and left feeling numb.

It was the ultimate payback for being a cocky asshole my entire life. Karma wasn’t done with me yet.

---

The day my brother returned home should’ve been a day to celebrate. When he walked in the door, I’d been texting Max and we’d been having a war of words and my mood had turned to shit. Although I wanted to join the rest of the family in welcoming him home, my mind was filled with anger toward Max.

I tried to ignore my phone, pushing her out of my mind while listening to Thomas. Seeing him sitting in my parents’ house brought me a bit of solace even as my world had been turned upside down.

On his second Sunday dinner, Thomas brought his girlfriend. Again, I’d been fighting with Max. It was all we seemed to do lately. My family was too wrapped up in him and his girlfriend, Angel, to realize that I was seriously pissed off as well as depressed. I was thankful, because the last thing I wanted to do was have a long conversation about how I’d become a pansy and joined the dark side.

The only person who noticed was Thomas. Even with the overwhelming reception he’d received after being gone for months, he saw right through me. I confessed, telling him as much about the situation as I felt comfortable with.

Although I wanted to spill my secrets and aggravations to Thomas, he didn’t need the hassle. He had enough to deal with at the moment to have to worry about my dumb ass.

Walking out the door on Max weeks ago had been the easy part. Living with the pain from the aftermath had become excruciating. There were times I wanted to turn my phone off. Seeing her messages every day reminded me that I couldn’t touch her. Even though I wanted to ignore her words and not respond, I couldn’t.

My need for any type of communication got the better of me. The one thing I wouldn’t do was beg her to give me another shot. I was done with that shit. When she begged me to see her, it took everything in me to say no. She asked if we could meet and just talk, but I knew how it would end up. There would be very little talking, lots of fucking, and I’d leave most likely after she threw me out. I wouldn’t do it again. I couldn’t relive the last few weeks.

The pain had finally started to dull, the ache in my chest turning into a twinge every once in a while. I wouldn’t do it. I couldn’t afford the pain. I was too old to deal with the bullshit and life was too fucking short.

When my brother called the family together because Angel had been kidnapped, I didn’t have time to think about Max. We worked together, bringing her home safely. When we arrived at Thomas’s house afterward, the entire family had gathered. Each person had their loved one waiting for them, but not me. I had no one.

To say that it hurt would be an understatement. What I wouldn’t have given to see Max standing there, waiting to see that I was okay. It wasn’t in the cards. I’d only thought about her a couple of times in the last forty-eight hours since the insanity of Angel’s abduction occurred.

But seeing everyone hugging and kissing with tears in their eyes had made me grouchier. Every feeling that had simmered beneath the surface was ready to bust free. I didn’t stay and celebrate with everyone. My heart wasn’t in it. I should’ve been elated, but Max’s absence in my life made me feel like shit.

I grabbed a bottle of tequila on the way home and decided to drink myself into oblivion. I was tired and ready to make it all disappear. What better way to do it than at the bottom of a bottle?

I was mortified and defeated.

The words I wanted to say to him were stuck on my tongue, but I couldn’t say them. Even when my mother threatened me, I still couldn’t. I didn’t want him to know. It was my secret. It was something that only my family and my closest friends knew.

I didn’t want him to look at me differently. I wouldn’t be able to survive it. When he walked out the door yet again, I held back the anguish I felt as my insides were shattering.

“What is wrong with you, Max?” My mother shook her head as she climbed to her feet. “That man seems to really like you, and you’re being selfish.”

“Mother,” I snapped as I jumped to my feet. “If I were selfish, I’d let him be mine. I’m saving him from me. He can’t fall in love with me. He just can’t.” I paced the tiny area between the coffee table and couch. He couldn’t. I wouldn’t allow it.

“He already does, child.”

“Ma, what he says and does are two different things.”

“I can tell by the way he lit up when you walked in the room. I haven’t heard a man fight so hard for the love of a woman. Can’t you see how he feels about you?”

I stopped dead in my tracks. “I do! That’s why I pushed him away, Mama. It’s not fair for him. It’s not right of me to love him.” I began to pace again.

She gripped my arms, stopping me as she shook me. “Baby, you deserve love as much as everybody else. If you don’t get your head out of your ass, you’re going to spend the rest of your life alone.”

“I have you, my family, and friends. I don’t need anyone else.”

“Lies. I won’t be here forever, Max. Your friends and family have their own loved ones. We all need somebody in life. Don’t push away a man that’s willing to fight for you.”

“Mama—”

She held up her hand. “I don’t want to hear it. Go tell that man that you love him and make him understand why you’ve been acting like a fool.”

“I can’t,” I whispered as my eyes flooded with tears.

“You will. If you don’t, Max, I’ll find that boy and tell him exactly what’s going on.”

“You wouldn’t!” I yelled as I closed my eyes. One thing I know about my mother is that she doesn’t speak hollow words.

“I will. Try me, child. Get yourself together and go beg for his forgiveness.”

There wasn’t a point in arguing with her. I knew she’d tell him if I didn’t. No matter how hard it would be to tell him my secret, it had to come from my mouth. I needed to look into his eyes when the realization and enormity of it sank in.