“Lane.” I took a deep breath and set her down, the water coming up to just under her breasts. “I want to ask you about something.”

“Sounds serious,” she said, making a face and mocking my sudden change in mood.

“It is…kind of.”

I wasn’t going to pop any questions, but if I could get some info out of her—something that might give me a clue as to what her perfect proposal and ideal aftermath were—it would be really helpful.

Or maybe a “Yes, Carson, I absolutely, definitely, 100 percent want to spend the rest of my life with you, starting with a huge wedding with 10,000 people we don’t know or care about. I’ll wear white”—then I’d make a bad joke—“and you can wear jeans. We’ll honeymoon in Las Vegas for a month and have sex a couple times a day for the rest of our lives, even after all our little munchkins are born! But, whatever you do, please, please, please, don’t propose in a memorable or creative way. I’d rather you just slip the ring under my coffee cup and forget all that romantic crap.”

“Why are you smiling like that?” she asked, one eyebrow raised.

“No reason. It’s just… I hope you know how much I love you.”

“I do.” As soon as the words left her mouth, she gasped. “I didn’t mean—”

“What?” I asked, pretending not to know why she was embarrassed. I had to start over. “What I was going to ask you is—”

When her face registered scared shock, I shut my mouth. Shit, I hadn’t even asked her anything yet. But she must have known I planned to. So did that look mean she was going to say no?

“Carson!” She screamed and jumped back into my arms, clutching me tightly.

Was that a yes? Hang on. I wasn’t sure I knew what the hell was actually happening right now. She kept spinning her head around, looking for something. Plus, you know, she hadn’t stopped screaming.

“What did I miss?”

“Something just bit me!”

“What?” Oh shit. What I’d assumed was shock had actually been pain.

“Get me out of here!”

I moved fast, pulling her tightly to me and heading for shore, just like we wished people in horror movies would do instead of standing there wondering what to do. I fought the water, praying I didn’t lose my footing or feel jaws close around my ass. Get her to the beach. Whatever happened to me, I just needed to make sure she was safe.

Couldn’t have been more than ten seconds before we reached the shore, but the journey had wiped me out. I tripped on sand, catching the bulk of my bodyweight before it landed full force on top of her. Then I heard her giggle.

I pushed myself onto both hands and stared down at her. Laughing.

Both of us were gasping for breath, me because I couldn’t get the newspaper headline out of my mind—Man Eaten by Shark Ruins Brother’s Wedding—and Lane because she couldn’t stop laughing.

“Oh, Carson, you should’ve seen your face!”

Why? I could imagine pretty damn well how stupid I'd looked already.

“Did something bite you or not?” I asked, still confused or in shock or confused or something. Or possibly confused.

She nodded quickly. “But I’m okay. More scared-the-shit-out-of-me than took-a-chunk-out-of-me.” Then her expression softened to concern. “I’m sorry! I totally freaked you out, didn’t I?”

“Course not,” I lied. I couldn’t really tell her why I’d looked that way or how she’d turned a potentially memorable moment into a terrifyingly memorable one. Although, either way… “Let me see this horrible injury of yours. Damned fish better not have ruined your ass.”

“It’s actually really starting to hurt.” Grimacing, she rolled out from under me, onto her stomach, and pulled her bikini bottom off one cheek. “Is it swollen?”

“Yep. As perfectly swollen as always. Still the only reason I’m with you. Other than your breasts. And you’re—”

“Carson!” she snapped. “Can you see any teeth marks or anything?”

“I could, if you’d ever let me bite you, but no, babe. There’s a little red mark, though. Like if you’d ever let me spank you.”

“Stop it! It’s not funny.”

“Are you okay?” a voice said from a few feet away. It was the thirteen-year-old, and he was staring at my girlfriend’s bare ass.

“She’s fine. Go away.” I tried to block the kid’s spank-worthy view.

“It could’ve been a jellyfish sting. Some of them are poisonous here. Maybe she got poisoned.”

Each time he said the P-word, Lane flinched. “What kind of poison are we talking about?”

I held up my hand to shut him up before he started a detailed rundown of every type of murderous sea creature he’d seen on Animal Planet, in the order of how painful a death they caused.

“You gotta learn how to talk to women, little man,” I mumbled. “It wasn’t a jellyfish.” I didn't think. “If it were, I’d have gotten stung too because my hands were all over your…” I glared at the kid. “Your upper, upper leg.”

If the little shit weren’t standing right next to us, I’d offer to suck out the poison just on the off chance it was a jellyfish. At least being angry at me for joking around would distract Lane from the pain.

"But we should probably… Holy—" I swear, a huge welt grew in front of my eyes, a thin line of ass-flesh swelling up and turning from pink to eww.

"What?" she yelled. "Carson, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, babe. Nothing. You're fine." With a fake smile and a pounding heart, I swept her up into my arms and carried her toward the resort’s front desk, hoping they had a surgeon on staff.

---

Turned out the kid was right. Some jellyfish in this part of the world were poisonous. I also learned that the pain of their stings got worse after the initial shock wore off. After twenty minutes of ice, the staff doctor put some goop on it, told me to continue putting goop on it until the goop-tube was empty, and gave Lane a couple pills and more ice.

"You'll be sore for a few days, but the pain will dissipate soon."

"Will she ever be able to use it again, doc?"

They both stared at me in shock.

"I meant to sit down!" I lied. "Geez!"

"I can handle it no matter how much it hurts," Lane told the doctor while still looking at me. "Especially considering I live with a bigger pain in the ass."

“Who?” I asked as innocently as I could manage.