Chapter 4
“Got any plans for next Saturday?” I was back at the restaurant, and I was serving Sam another piece of apple pie.
“I never plan that far into the future. You know this. How can anyone make plans in Muleshoe, anyway?” Sam responded in his tender, loving voice.
Sam was an attractive guy. I had to give credit where it was due. He worked as a farmer on his family’s land since graduating a few years before me. His father, Lonny Howard, was one of my favorite customers. That meant he was one of my best tippers. Sam and I had known each other for years, and occasionally we would hang out with each other from time to time as adults. Strictly platonic, but he was about the only male companionship I had even recognized existed in the last few years. Although our relationship never involved being romantic, I could tell that Sam cared for me, in a more than older loving brother kind of way. Of course, there were sometimes when his male instincts would remind him that I was not his blood sister and therefore he wouldn’t be guilty of incestuous feelings, and my Dad, and even Patricia and Brian, would think we were romantically involved somehow, but that was just our friendly playfulness with each other. He and I had been very close friends all these years, and he was the one that was there for me during my Mom’s passing.
“What would you say to going to my twenty-year high school reunion with me next Saturday?” I was trying to say it in a take it or leave it kind of way. The only reason I had even considered going now was because after encountered Janet at the market I figured the shock value she gave me was well worth the entertainment of a full night. I could see how everyone else turned out, good or bad, and I couldn’t be that bad. I’d just changed in girth, nothing much else. “I mean, you don’t have to go or anything. I was just wondering you wanted to. It might be fun to see everyone. Even if you were a few years older than them, you still hung out with a couple of us back in the day.” I had to quit talking before I sounded too anxious.
“Sure. I’ll go with you.” Sam muffled as he stuffed a big piece of pie in his mouth. He grabbed his perfectly folded napkin and wiped the corners of his mouth. “Is it like prom? Do I have to buy you a corsage?” He smiled and looked down to get another heaping spoonful.
“Prom? No, why would you even say that? You’ve had reunions, it’ll be the same as yours. What was yours like?” I was a little confused as to why he would say such an awkward thing about something that I figured was utterly mundane and commonplace among people older than me.
“Well,” Sam proceeded, “most classes have five-year, ten-year reunions and so on. Most classes I know never just have a twenty-year class reunion, and as far as I can recall, your class has never had a single reunion until now. What’s that all about?” I couldn’t tell if he was being playful or sincere, but I did know he was picking on me.
“If you must know, it was something we all agreed on, well, the majority agreed on it. Everyone senior year thought that we would all be successful in our careers and family, leaving us in a position that was far too busy for us to be bothered about meeting each other every five years or so, so we all decided we’d only have a twenty-year reunion and maybe a fiftieth too. Everyone thought it was the best way to head into the future without looking back. At the time, it seemed like a good idea, but it does seem weird now that you’ve brought it up. What if we’ve grown too distant?” I spun up a dish towel I had in hand and snapped it playfully in Sam’s direction. He smiled, but didn’t really take his attention of his pie. I turned to check the kitchen window for orders, and just happened to catch my Dad staring in our direction with a smile.
“The order for table two will be ready in a minute. You can keep chatting.” My Dad grinned as he looked at me and then around me to Sam, who had in the minute decided to look up from his plate, now clean of pie.
Chapter 5
“I knew you would come!” Janet squealed as she saw me walk in the gymnasium doors. “You said you weren’t going to come, but you came!” She was past the free-throw line on the gym floor, and came racing my way.
Sam and I stood there, scanning our surroundings, as Janet made her way over to us. The gym was packed with middle-aged folks, all with a drink in hand. There were a few even dancing around the half court line to the REO Speedwagon ballad playing over the loudspeakers. So far it seemed like a pretty lively bunch. Maybe we’d actually have a good time.
“Oh, and who are you?” Janet said in a flirtatious voice, as she held her hand out in front of Sam for him to shake it. “Aren’t you a brisk drink of water?” She eyed Sam up and down a few times. One may have been embarrassed by her forwardness, but her pick up line was way more embarrassing, so either Sam didn’t know what to aim at, or he just didn’t care, because he looked perfectly unscathed. In fact, he seemed to be glowing under the sudden attention. He was eating it up. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye for his reaction, and his smile was taking up the majority of his face. I don’t remember him having so many teeth. Was his smile always this big? I thought to myself.
“Janet, you remember Sam. He graduated a few years before us. He works for his Dad out on the Howard family land. Don’t you remember him? I’m going to give you guys a few to catch up. I’m going to go get a drink, do either of you want anything?” My voice fell onto deaf ears as they were both already in deep conversation and did not take notice to my departure.
I figured I’d use this opportunity to scoot away and let those two chat. Yes, I knew Janet was married, but she was the one that said she wanted to party like we were in high school again. Well, from what I can remember, she was a slut in high school, and maybe that’s exactly what Sam needed for a night. After all of Sam and I’s flirting, I never felt like we had a sexual tension between us. However, there were times that I thought maybe he wanted more. Maybe Janet was just what he needed to take the edge off, and in the end, take the pressure off of me in thinking he may want something more with me some day. He’d never put the moves on me, but guys just put off a vibe when they are horny, and I have definitely felt his vibes on more than one occasion. I know it’s nothing emotional coming from him. He just needs a release, and I’m a woman. If I’m in his company, it’s only understandable that he may think he wants me, but he’s always been a smart enough gentleman to not cross the line with me. Janet was someone I can see him taking over that line. I’d be more than happy to help him, which was why I was walking away from them just then.
I headed over to the cash bar. I can’t even remember the last time I drank. I figured I better play it cool and just go with a glass of white wine. I was never one to be able to hold my liquor very well, and I definitely didn’t want to get out of control in front of a bunch of people I haven’t seen since my prime. The bartender took my order and poured me a house wine. I fumbled in my pocket book for a few extra dollars to include for the time. In my profession, I know to take care of the servers, regardless if I plan on ordering anymore through the course of the evening. I turned around and looked towards the direction I had left Sam with Janet. I didn’t see them. Oh well.
I leaned casually against the bar and drank in my surroundings. I felt like I was at a school dance with the faculty, and I was one of the teachers. We were all so much older. I saw a group at one table that looked like ladies from the old volleyball team. They were laughing it up as a group of men stood close to their table. My guess was it was the husbands, as none of them looked like aged people I knew. Everyone had changed. I felt out of place. I had brought Sam to keep me company, but I couldn’t stand in the way of the sparks I saw between him and Janet. I’m sure they would catch up with me later on. After all, Janet was so excited for her and me to live it up tonight.
“I see you still hate crowds,” a voice as alarmingly pleasant as a seasoned sports commentator suddenly took me off my train of thought. I looked up, not prepared to see this absolutely gorgeous man standing right beside me. I felt my knees get weak a little. I stared into his eyes and felt like I was losing my sense of self in a black abyss. The intensity with which he looked at me didn’t help me restrain myself at all and it was the soft touch of his arm holding my shoulder that made me realize I seemed to need actual help to stand up in his presence. “Are you okay?” he asked, the sound of his vocals trailed in my ear drum like an echo.
“I’m fine,” I finally managed to say, after a pause.
“You look confused, don’t you remember?” he asked. So, I did know this fine specimen of a man. How did I know this fine specimen of a man? He obviously wasn’t from around town. “Teresa, it’s me, Gavin.” He seemed a little disappointed in my poor memory, and the sight of his face muscles expressing any sort of discontent made me want to kill myself for causing it, but how could I know? This wasn’t the Gavin I remembered.
I looked into his eyes, a daring risk I might add, his presence had already stunted my ability to move around. Eye contact would surely paralyze me entirely. He was Gavin Miller alright. However, he wasn’t the Gavin Miller I had shared a pre-calculus class with twenty-five years ago, he was closer to the man I had probably spent a few classes day dreaming about growing up to meet. The irony, it seemed, was that he had been with me all along, waiting to bloom. Gavin had grown into the kind of man that you would focus all your mental energy on whenever you felt down and hopeless and just wanted to dream of a better life. He was the kind of man that you would find running through your mind on a white horse coming to save you from whatever torturous nightmares a maiden was experiencing. The years had been remarkable to him. His face posed no lines and his hair had just the right salt and pepper color that made you question his age, it felt like a mix of wisdom and energetic youth. He was dress to the nines and looked polished from head to toe, almost sparkling. I couldn’t believe it was him.
“Gavin. It’s so nice to see you.” So nice, I sound so desperate! I thought to myself. It was all I could think to say. He was virtually making me birth butterflies in my womb which headed to my stomach and made me feel something I hadn’t felt for a long time. Here was someone that I had never given a second thought to, crippling me with his mere casual presence. I couldn’t believe what he was doing to me, and I immediately began to plot my sweet escape. I was sure that he would pick up on my dreadful composure, as I was beginning to think I wouldn’t be able to hold it much longer. If you could call this holding it together.
“You look absolutely ravishing, Teresa. I knew I would have a treat in seeing you if I came back for the reunion.” His voice sounded like music, the gentle crystalizing of harmonies not often found together. He owned his voice with such measure that his perfectly broad shoulders and healthy physique made it seem like no one in the world could even hope to speak as eloquently as he was speaking to me right now. As if this wasn’t bad enough, he had just given me the most flattering compliment I had ever received.
What was happening? I felt like I was whisked away to a fairytale, and this was happening just by the miracle of his voice and the words coming out of his mouth, his gorgeous chiseled mouth. I knew that I had to get myself together, or he would think that I was swooning over him, excuse me, he would know I was swooning over him, which I’m sure was what most females would do in his presence. I had to be different from all these other girls. I hadn’t been even remotely interested in a man’s looks for so long. Even with regards to Sam, I was aware of what Janet could see in him. He was a nice-looking guy, very wholesome appeal. However, Sam just never was my cup of tea. He just never did it for me. I never got the feeling with Sam, and here I was drowning in that feeling with Gavin.
I took my eyes away from him and focused on the people around us, hoping to regain some self-control.
“Who did you come here with?” he asked, earnestly.
“Oh, uh, I came here with Sam, but he’s sort of vanished with Janet for the time being.”
“So that leaves you alone?” he teased, a little smile creeping over him.
“I guess. You don’t look like you’re here with anyone either.” I pointed out.
“I just arrived. I drove all the way here. I had a lot on my mind and figured a long drive would help me take the edge off.” Hmm, interesting. Gavin had things he needed to take his mind off. Even perfect looking people didn’t seem to have perfect lives, but his crisp looking suit suggested his problems weren’t all that terrible.
“What’s been bothering you?” I asked. I figured if I could keep the attention on him, he wouldn’t have time to notice my nervous breakdown, and I feared I wouldn’t be able to talk about myself if he asked. Besides, what could I talk about? I spent my days at a diner, nothing happened there.
“Well, since we are at a reunion and everything. I don’t feel like my life is where I imagined it would be at this time. So I’ve been reflecting on that a lot.” He had a hint of sadness in his voice, and I felt compelled to hug him and tell him everything would be alright, but of course I didn’t, I was still trying to regain control of my motor skills.
I didn’t know what else to say so we stood there looking at everyone else for a few more breaths.
“How about you?” he asked. “How’s life been treating you?” Great. I had to talk now, and I had to talk about myself.
“Well, I don’t really have much to say. You know I’m still at the diner and all, family tradition.” I moped. I didn’t feel bad about being still at the diner, but my mother’s dying wish started to make it a tad bit unfulfilling, especially when I had to acknowledge it out loud.
“I love how you and your family stick together and support each other, my grandparents haven’t been very supportive of my choices since I left town. They think I’m turning into some sort of corporate cliché story. At first I didn’t mind them, but as the years passed it kind of started to bother me.”
“Your grandparents are adorable”
“Yes they are. But their idea of becoming a corporate cliché, or any kind of cliché for that matter, is starting to ring true.” He took a sip from his glass after that. He looked as if he was letting all the time that had passed sink in. “I don’t really want to sour your mood with mine though. I think I’ll just step out for a bit.”
“Oh, I can walk you out, I don’t really mind.” Stupid little me. If he hadn’t sensed my pheromones by now, I had just revealed them myself. My woman juices had to be jutting out of my pores onto him with every breath I was taking. What else could drive me to offer my company when he clearly wanted to be alone? I’m sure he was like most men, his first instinct would be to assume I was down for anything. The worst part about it was that I wasn’t sure I wasn’t down for anything, especially with a man of his stature.
“That would be great actually, let’s get out of here.” He said, offering an inviting smile. I made a point to myself to not be that easy. We were going out to talk and that would be it. I didn’t have much of a reputation in high school, but I wasn’t about to start tonight. It may have been over a year since the last time I fooled around with someone, and I can’t even remember his name, as I had made sure it happened during an out-of-town adventure of mine, and only in the heat of the moment, which no one would ever find out about. Single life for a woman in her hometown at my age was grounds for discussion if anyone thought I had been getting lucky. I couldn’t go somewhere private with Gavin. Someone might see us leave together. I was the one that had to live in this small town after tomorrow, while everyone else could go back to their dream lives. The last thing I needed was the town gossip to include me losing my regrown cherry over a one night stand with an old classmate. Perhaps I was overthinking things, Gavin hadn’t made any clear advance yet, if anything, he seemed like he wanted to vent with words and not his body. Would that hurt my feelings? If he didn’t want to make a move, and just wanted someone to talk to? I started to get cold feet as soon as he took a step forward.
“Wait, I don’t think I can leave, Gavin. Sam and Janet might be looking for me,” I said as I peered again over the groups of people standing around reminiscing. They were evidently nowhere to be seen, and I blushed a little as I realized how stupid I was making myself look. I came off as a shy teenage girl. I could have told him the real reason that I was afraid of anything happening between us, leaving me with a new whore label in the morning, but I spoke as safely as I could.
He looked a little hurt by this, and strangely, that flattered me a little. “Come on. Just a quick stroll along the grounds. It’d be nice to get away from all this eighties music. High school was great, but the music of that era isn’t something I miss. Let’s go somewhere quiet. I promise not to bore you with my depression anymore,” he said, grabbing my arm and linking it with his. He led me out the side door next to the stage before I could even put up so much as a protest. I had gone from being paralyzed to being a puppet and he had the strings, my body moved automatically wherever he took me. The departure was much less noticeable than walking the entire length of the gym to the front doors. I had forgotten these doors were even here. The doors were perfect for our getaway out into the darkness.