Courtney
“I have to go,” I say with a laugh. “My shift starts in an hour. I still need to shower and get ready.”
“I’ll bathe you,” Rome teases.
He has his heavy arm thrown over my chest and his nose buried in my hair. Harvey Benjamin is lying across my legs. It’s as if they plotted out this little scheme beforehand to keep me here and away from work.
“You two are devious.”
Rome’s hand finds my cheek and he turns my head so that our mouths meet. He kisses me sweetly. “We just like you in our bed.”
His words warm me from the inside out. “Believe me, I’d rather stay here.”
“So quit. The diner doesn’t need you.”
I let out a sad sigh. “I would if I could, but you know I have to keep working there to pay tuition.” He went with me when I enrolled in my classes and paid for this semester’s tuition and books, so he knows I’m completely broke now.
“When do we get you back in our bed?” he asks, his hand cupping my bare breast.
“I can come back over tonight.”
“I’ll pick you up at seven.” His lips kiss a trail down my throat.
“When will my car be fixed?” I ask. “I hate that you have to drive me everywhere.”
“I like driving you everywhere.”
His mouth sucks on my nipple and I let out a loud moan that has Harvey Benjamin freeing my legs as he moves to his recliner. Anytime we have sex, the dog sighs the entire time from the chair, as if he’s annoyed we’re choosing to play without him. I start giggling and Rome lifts up to look down at me. His mouth is red from sucking on me and his eyes are sleepy. Long black strands of hair hang down over his brows and some scruff is growing in on his cheeks. He’s so incredibly hot that sometimes I have to simply stare at him. Often, I want to slap my teenage self for not seeing him before recently. This gorgeous, intense man had been literally sitting behind me—watching me—for years and I’d done my best to ignore him.
Rome maneuvers himself between my thighs and fucks me gently, his green eyes drinking up my features. When he looks at me like that, it drives me insane with happiness. We lose ourselves to the act, and the moment we both come, I clean up, gather my things, give him a quick kiss, and then bolt.
I’m still smiling as I walk outside to where my mom’s car is that I borrowed.
Flash.
Flash. Flash. Flash.
“Miss Moss, is it true you’re having a romantic relationship with the brother of the girl you drove to suicide?”
Flash. Flash. Flash.
It takes me a moment to analyze the scene before me. Reporters everywhere. At least from five or six different local news stations. Their vans line the street in front of Rome’s house.
“W-What are you doing here?” I stammer out.
A guy with too much makeup on shoves a microphone in my face. “Can you tell the viewers of the News on Seven, why you’ve been staying with Rome Murray?”
I shake my head. “What? No. This is none of your business.” I fumble in my purse for my keys.
“Is this even legal? Does Rome Murray have a restraining order against you? A source tells us you were reaching out to an attorney to sue Rome Murray. Is this true? What are you suing him for?” a woman rambles out so many questions, half of them barely register.
“I’m not suing him,” I choke out, my face turning bright red as I realize Jackson might have tipped them off.
“Miss Moss,” the heavily made up male reporter interrupts, shoving between the woman and myself. “If you’ll please answer my questions.” He bumps against me and I fall onto my ass, the contents of my purse spilling all over the grass. They crowd around me and I begin to panic.
“How did it feel when you knowingly led the Murray woman through a bogus relationship? Did you enjoy misleading her? Do you feel responsible for her death?”
The guy with the pink cheeks and rosy lips once again shoves his mic in my face. I swat it away, but he’s relentless.
Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!
A growling resounds out behind me and then a big, goofy white dog I love so much charges into the throng of reporters surrounding me. Several of them cry out and jump away as he sidles himself next to me. His body is coiled and tense, as if he’s ready to bite anyone who dares get in my face again.
“It’s okay, Harvey Benjamin,” I whisper as I run my fingers down his spine.
The Ken doll reporter isn’t fazed. Apparently getting the next biggest story is more important than his life.
“Miss Moss, if you’ll answer the question. Are you or aren’t you with the man whose sister you murdered?”
He’s suddenly jerked away from me. HB whines in approval. Rome stands over me, his chest heaving with fury in nothing but a pair of black boxers. He’s an avenging angel. Darkness and rage. Hell personified. With a growl that is far scarier than anything HB could muster, Rome swings his hand out, pointing at them all.
“She’s with me. She’s mine. Get the fuck off my property,” he snarls.
“Aren’t you afraid she’s setting you up like she set up your sister?” a reporter bellows.
I let out a squeak when Rome kneels and scoops me into his arms. When he rises, everyone’s eyes are on us, many in shock. I bury my face against the side of his neck, my lips pressed against his raven, so I don’t have to see them.
“I guess that answers my questions,” the girly man reporter huffs.
Rome doesn’t reply but instead stalks back toward the house. I can hear the jangling of HB’s collar as he follows behind us. Once we’re inside and Rome sits down on the sofa with me in his arms, I burst into tears. HB jumps up beside me and tries to lick the sadness away from my cheeks.
“I’m s-sorry,” I sob. “This is all my f-fault.”
Rome grips my hips and maneuvers me until I’m straddling him. His fingers thread into my hair and he pulls me until our mouths press together.
“This is not your fault. They’re assholes,” he mutters, biting on my bottom lip.
Another tear races down my cheek as he kisses me. I find the strength to push away from him and regard him. “It is my fault, though.”
He scowls as his palm grips the front of my throat. Firmly, he tugs me to him. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does,” I rasp out when he squeezes.
“It doesn’t matter what happened in the past or what they say. The only thing that matters is…” He trails off and swallows. His Adam’s apple bobs in his throat. I want to drag my tongue along the front of it.
“What?” I encourage, my body grinding shamelessly against his now-hard cock.
“All that matters is that I love you.”
I blink several times in confusion. “You what?”
“I love you,” he tells me, his voice gravelly with need. “And you love me too.”
Two weeks later…
“Tacos,” Mike says, grinning wickedly.
I used to hate him because he was a bully and kind of disgusting, but he’s growing on me. “You only want tacos because you’re a perv,” I reply, rolling my eyes.
“I already ordered pizza,” Rome barks out as he knocks Mike’s hat off. “And stop talking to my woman.”
Mike winks at me. “So this is a bad time to tell you Court and I have been having a secret affair?”
Rome doesn’t take the bait as he wraps himself around me from behind. He gropes my breasts in a possessive way. “My woman prefers giant cocks. Not whatever baby creature you’re packin’ in your tighty-whities.”
Mike curls his lip up. “Haven’t you ever heard the saying? It’s not about the size of the boat.” He thrusts his hips and licks his lips. “It’s the motion of the ocean.”
I laugh and Rome nips at the side of my neck. “Don’t you have someone else to bother at this party?”
Mike’s eyes widen and his grin is wolfish. “I hear Dottie’s available. I bet she wouldn’t complain about the size of my boat.” He saunters off, leaving us alone in the kitchen.
My phone buzzes and I pull it from my pocket as Rome sucks on my neck.
Mom: Make sure to bring the car by Keith’s in the morning. I have some errands to run. Love you.
I reply back that I will before setting my phone down on the counter. Turning in Rome’s arms, I look up and smile. “When will my car be ready? I’m starting to think you’re keeping it hostage.”
He snorts, his green eyes twinkling with mischief. “That piece of shit needs a lot of work.” When he rattles off a bunch of car talk, I shake my head.
“You lost me at timing belt.”
He laughs and kisses my mouth. “I could teach you about other belts.”
Heat floods to my core. “You plan on spanking me?”
“Oh, much better than that, beautiful. You lack imagination.” His palm wraps around my throat and then I get on the same page as him.
“You’re obsessed with my neck,” I tease.
He bites my flesh below my ear. “I am.”
“Did you like choking all your other girlfriends?”
A sound of irritation escapes him as he runs his thumb along the outside of my throat in such a gentle way it causes me to shiver with anticipation. “Only you.”
“Oh, gee, I feel so special,” I deadpan. “I’m the only chick my guy wants to choke down.”
He laughs and tugs on my earlobe with his teeth. “Maybe I ought to whip you after all, smartass.”
“So you’re a sadist too,” I observe playfully.
“You like it when I hurt you,” he replies, his tone dead serious.
Arousal floods through me and I know my panties are embarrassingly wet. “You’re a tease.” The words are barely out of my mouth before he has me scooped into his powerful arms. People holler and cheer as we pass them. It isn’t until we’re in his bedroom with the door closed and Harvey Benjamin sighing in annoyance that he shows me just how serious he is.
“Get on your knees, sheep.” Now when he calls me sheep, it’s meant to tease, not hurt.
I grin as I obey. He tears off his T-shirt and I admire his tattooed, sculpted chest. My God, he’s so hot. I know he works out a lot, but damn, I feel lacking in comparison. He’s all hard, beautiful curves. My curves are soft and squishy. Especially now that he feeds me all the time. I swear I’ve gained ten pounds with him. His favorite thing to do is bite on my bare stomach that’s extra pudgy as of late because of all the pizza and tacos. I’m proud to say the last cut was weeks ago. My stomach is healing up and I think secretly that’s one of the reasons he seems to adore me there.
He unbuckles his belt and rips it from the loops with a swish that makes my core clench. His jeans hang low on his hips and the white band of his boxers peeks over the top. I’m desperate to rip them down and watch his heavy cock bob out. To lick the tip until he greedily shoves the entire thing past my lips and fucks my face.
“Someone’s hungry for cock,” he notes, a devilish grin on his face. “But bad girls don’t get cock.”
I laugh, but then he roughly wraps the belt around my throat, careful to pull my hair out after. He runs his fingers through my silky blond strands.
“I love you,” he mutters to himself, a frown on his handsome face.
“I love you too,” I tell him quickly and rise so I can kiss his mouth.
The darkness evaporates from his mood as he kisses me hard. I’m manhandled out of my clothes and then pushed over the edge of the bed. He drives into me without warning. My neck screams in pain when he jerks on the belt still around my throat. His hand clutches my hip in a possessive way while he keeps me pulled back just far enough away from the bed that I can’t reach the mattress to support myself. Stars glitter my vision as I begin to lose consciousness. He pounds into me relentlessly. As I start to black out and the rasping coming from me dies down, I nearly explode when his hand leaves my hip to touch my clit. I was slipping, but now I’m very much in the present as I desperately chase the orgasm on the horizon.
“That’s it,” he urges, his voice low. “Come for me and I’ll let your pretty neck go.”
His words blanket me. The nerves rattling through me seem to explode the moment I tip over the edge. This time, I do black out, but the pleasure pulsating through me keeps me roused and awake. I come so hard my knees buckle. He releases the belt and wraps an arm around the front of my chest. His kisses on my shoulder are reverent as he fucks me until he loses his mind.
A groan.
Heat.
I should make sure he understands—that what we’re doing is playing a dangerous game.
When I tense, he misconstrues it for something else. Quickly, he yanks the belt away and twists me around to face him. With a sweetness I didn’t know he possessed, he rains kisses down all over my face. I melt at his tender touch.
Maybe he does know. Maybe he doesn’t care. Maybe everything will be okay.
“Pizza’s here, fuckers,” Mike bellows from the other side of the door.
Harvey Benjamin barks because pizza is his favorite.
“Let’s get cleaned up and you fed before that moron eats it all.”
He steals one more kiss before letting me go.
“I’m going to bed,” I say with a yawn.
The guys are locked in an intense poker game. It’s well after midnight and I’m bored. Rome turns to give me a kiss before peeking at his cards again. I leave the kitchen, passing a few people making out in the living room, and head to Rome’s room. When I pass Raven’s room, I can’t help but go inside. Just for a moment.
The room is just as it was the last time I was here. Rome promises we’ll go through it one day. I’m eager to look through her things and learn more about her. In a perfect world, I would’ve befriended her and flirted with her brother in high school. He and I could have been an item long ago.
And Raven would still be alive.
With a tightness in my chest, I close the door behind me and walk over to her desk. I sit in the chair and dig around. I’ve already been through most of her stuff now. I keep thinking I’ll uncover something new.
As I look around the room, I recall a memory from the past.
LonelyLogan69: I miss you. What are you doing?
PoetPrincess99: Writing in my journal.
LonelyLogan69: Like a diary?
PoetPrincess99: Something like that.
I frown as I think about a diary my mom bought me once. It was pink and leather-bound. The tiny lock was gold and had two keys. I didn’t ever write anything in it. Never really had anything to say. It felt stupid, like I was talking to myself. And when Whitney found it one day, she went crazy trying to pick the lock. It was one of the few fights we had. We were both fourteen and she had just gotten braces. I remember exactly the way her lip curled up in disgust, but it revealed her metal mouth, which had me fighting a giggle.
“What are you hiding?”
Her question hurt me because I told Whitney everything. She was upset with me and I hadn’t done anything wrong. Her playfulness melted away to meanness as she tried to bully me into unlocking the diary. Eventually, with tears rolling down my cheeks, I gave in and threw the keys at her. She unlocked it and stared at the only page I’d written on.
Whitney + Courtney = BFFs 4 Ever
She cried and apologized. Of course I accepted her apology. That’s what best friends do.
LonelyLogan69: Is it pink? Does it have a lock on it?
PoetPrincess99: I’m eighteen, not twelve.
She sends a picture of her peeking over the top of the teal leopard print composition book. Her black eyebrow is arched in a way that has a thrill of excitement rippling through me. She’s so pretty. I don’t know how I missed it before. But she is. Her cheekbones are high and her eyes tell stories that I want to hear. With her height and build, she could be a model. Unlike my shorter, more muscular frame, Raven has a stunning body that most women starve themselves to achieve. I still can’t believe she doesn’t have a boyfriend.
I’m her boyfriend.
I smile and it’s bittersweet. It’s strange. I feel as though I really do have a relationship with Raven. Half the time, I’m convinced I’m this Zac Efron lookalike named Logan who’s her boyfriend.
LonelyLogan69: Do you write about me in your journal?
PoetPrincess99: No.
A pang of sadness causes my eyes to prickle with tears.
LonelyLogan69: Sheesh. Thanks.
PoetPrincess99: It’s not what you think. What are you wearing?
Once again, she deflects and changes the subject. This is what always throws me off. She easily distracts me because I have to quickly describe an outfit I’d see Lee wearing and not accidentally tell her I’m wearing a T-shirt and a pair of panties. I certainly don’t tell her that every time I message with her, I find my finger rubbing against the silky fabric along my pussy.
LonelyLogan69: Boxers.
PoetPrincess99: Oooh, tell me more.
LonelyLogan69: There is no more to tell.
PoetPrincess99: Naughty boy.
“Where are you hiding?” I murmur aloud as I scan the bedroom. I’ve been through her desk, so I know the teal journal is not there. Quickly, I rummage through her closet but don’t turn up anything. If I were Raven, where would I hide my journal?
I think back to her poem that was stuck randomly in her other notebook. It seemed out of place and like it didn’t belong. A message rather than a poem. Of course I memorized her words. I always do.
The giant and the raven,
In slumber side by side.
Her other half loathes him.
But she soothes the giant to protect the part of her heart that lives.
Beneath.
Beneath.
The raven has the answers, but you have to dig.
Her other half will save the princess.
I drop to my knees and bend to look under the bed. Nothing but cobwebs and a shoe. With a sigh, I sit back on my haunches. Then a thought occurs to me. Reaching my palm between the mattress and box spring, I feel around until my hand makes contact with something. I jerk it out and almost choke when I realize it’s the journal.
I don’t move from my position and immediately flip to the first page. It’s dated two years ago.
He came home, called Rome a disgusting homo, and hit my brother in the stomach. I was able to calm him down, but Rome was in so much pain I thought we should take him to the ER. When I mentioned it to Dad, he only became enraged and accused us of fucking. Then, he told my brother he’d rip his cock off with his teeth if he even looked at his daughter wrong. I’m terrified of my father.
A sick sensation settles in the pit of my belly. I flip the page. It’s dated three days later.
He came home from work drunk again. Rome was wisely in his room with the door locked. Dad kicked the door in and punched my brother in the face. He was asleep, so the attack was unprovoked. Rome was defenseless. When I tried to comfort my brother after Dad passed out on the couch, Rome told me to go to hell. I’m so scared Dad will kill him.
Someone sobs and it takes a moment to realize it’s me. I remember one day Rome showing up to school with two black eyes and a bandage over his nose. The whispered rumors were that he got in a fight with a thug at the mall. It wasn’t that at all. It was his father. I remembered feeling compelled to ask him if he was okay, but then Whitney told me to stop looking at him because I was giving him the wrong ideas—that freaks like that rape girls like me. She scared me shitless.
I was such a damn sheep.
Hastily, I swipe my tears away and turn the page that’s dated three weeks later.
I’ve found something that works. If I meet Dad at the door and distract him, he leaves Rome alone. All I have to do is say things about Mom. Or tell him about my school day. I lie and tell him everything is perfect. He loves it when I smile. It worked until tonight. I smelled the hard liquor on his breath. He was out of control and kicked Rome in the ribs so hard I’m sure he broke one. Why won’t he leave my brother alone? When Rome hurts, I hurt. It must be the twin thing. My chest aches for my brother. I wish we had help. Will anyone believe us? Two sixteen-year-old outcasts?
My heart squeezes for them both. Poor Rome. I didn’t realize he got his ass kicked by his dad so often. Flipping page after page, I learn about Rome’s frequent abuse.
Can my father go to jail for this? But who will take care of us if he’s gone too? Will they put us in a home? Will they separate us? I have so many questions.
Then, the entry skips a couple of weeks.
I’ve saved up some money from the diner. I’m going to talk to someone who may have answers for me.
The next day is another entry.
He’s beautiful. I can’t believe I’m crushing on him. But he says he can help—that he’ll even help for free. I’m going back tomorrow to discuss it in more detail.
I’m about to skip ahead when I hear the knob to the bedroom door twist. I let out a squeak of surprise as I shove the journal back under the mattress. I’m still on my knees when Jamal slinks into the room, an evil smirk on his face.
“Looking for this?” he says, his voice cold. He waves my phone at me before tossing it on the floor in front of me. I don’t like the idea that he’s had my phone in his possession.
I look down and see the familiar app I used to use when corresponding with Raven. Frowning, I pick it up and notice a video. As soon as I hit play, I gape at it horrified. Jamal fucks some chick over the desk in the supply room. I can’t tell who she is, just that he’s fucking her from behind. Her moans are breathy, so I don’t recognize the voice.
“What is this?” I demand.
He unbuckles his jeans and pulls his dick into his hand. “It’s us, baby.”
I’m so shocked at his words, I simply stare at him in horror. “N-No. That is not us.”
Like a panther pouncing on his prey, he launches at me. His hand fists my hair and he tries to force his dick into my mouth. I turn my head, ignoring the painful fire ripping at my scalp.
“Rome!”
Jamal laughs, and the tone is sinister. “Shhhh,” he says loudly. “Better be quiet or he’ll find out about us.”
I squirm and struggle against him. His dick whaps my cheek as I clutch his thighs, digging my nails into his flesh. He doesn’t move, though. My lips remain pressed together as tears stream out. I think I’m winning until he kicks me in the side of the ribs. A scream escapes me that is quickly silenced by his dick being crammed into my mouth. I start gagging when he’s roughly jerked away from me.
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO HER?” Rome roars as he slams his fist into Jamal’s face three times in quick succession.
Jamal scrambles to the other side of the bed and shoves his cock back into his jeans. Rome drags me to my feet and into his arms.
“I’m tired of hiding, Courtney,” Jamal snaps. “Tell him or I will.”
Rome stiffens against me and I let out a sob.
“H-He’s lying!”
“I’m not lying. Look at her phone,” Jamal barks at Rome.
“It’s not me in the video,” I choke out. “I swear.” I shove the phone into Rome’s hands. “See for yourself.”
He starts scrolling through the app and his jaw clenches. The raven on his neck seems to be throbbing with rage, as though it might peel itself from his flesh and peck someone’s eyeballs out.
“How long has this been going on?” Rome asks, his tone deadly. His green eyes are cold as he flicks them my way.
“What?”
“This goes back a while. There are pictures—naked pictures you sent me—that you also sent to him. Were you playing me?” he asks through gritted teeth. “Was this some goddamned game to you?”
I snatch the phone from his grip and am horrified to discover what looks like a romantic affair that’s gone on for at least a couple of weeks. I don’t understand how this has happened. I’ve never messaged with Jamal my entire life. Yet, here he has a whole conversation. It’s been done from my phone through this app. I don’t understand.
When I see a picture of my fingers touching my clit, I close my eyes as more tears leak out.
“Unfuckingreal,” Rome snaps. “You fucking disgust me, sheep.”
I blink my eyes open and gape at him in horror. “W-What? You believe this?”
His stare is hateful. “This is your MO, isn’t it? Fuck over the Murray twins until they’re both fucking dead. Newsflash, bitch, I’m not going to swallow a bunch of pills because Courtney Fucking Moss tried to ruin my life. I don’t get mad, I get even.”
“Rome, I—”
“Get out of my house before I do something I can’t take back,” he threatens. Despite his terrifying stance and how furious he is, I know he wouldn’t hurt me.
When I reach out to touch him, he staggers backward as though I carry the plague.
“Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. My. House.”
I stare at him for a long moment before pushing past him. “Don’t be a sheep,” I bite out under my breath.
He grips my bicep and doesn’t allow me to leave. “What the hell did you just say to me?”
I swallow and lift my chin. My eyes meet his and I glare through my tears. “You heard me perfectly clear.” I straighten my spine, my stance unwavering under his menacing stare.
“We’re over,” he spits out at me. “Fucking over.”
I cup his cheek despite the way his body quakes with rage. “You’re right about that, buddy. I won’t allow you or anyone else,” I hiss, shooting a death glare at Jamal before turning back to Rome, “to ever talk to me this way again. To ever put your hands on me this way again.” I peel away his hand and point my finger in his face. “Ever. Again.”
Rome’s fury melts away as confusion sets in.
“You disappoint me,” I whisper, my heart breaking when his face seems to crumple at my harshly murmured words. I stroke his cheek once more before storming out of his house and out of his life for good.