Chapter 11

Jesse’s mind whirled. This was wholly new information. Nobody had ever had an indication that Hal Roberts had suffered from depression. This was going to be game-changing news. Jesse was beyond ecstatic that she was going to get to be the author of the article that revealed this snippet of information.

Beyond the professional gains this would bring her, though, Jesse was also curious personally about the issue, and more than a little concerned. She noticed that Hal had been silent for a long moment, and she decided it was likely time for some more questioning on her part.

“Well, surely your own mental illness played a large part in your creation of the film,” Jesse prompted, eager to continue the conversation.

“Oh, no doubt.” He nodded, taking up his glass of wine to sip at it. “It especially came in handy when I had to actually act out the part. It was a rough ride and brought back a lot of horrible memories. But truthfully, I am grateful to have revisited that part of my life. It offered up a lot of closure for a lot of things that were in the back of my mind through my whole career.”

Jesse got down his comments on her notepad and was eager to listen to them again as she went over the recording later.

“Now,” she spoke again as she finished jotting down her notes. “You said that your own struggles played a part in your inspiration; you were more influenced by the bonds you made with others, yes?”

“Absolutely.” He nodded. “It’s definitely a very profound experience when you spend so much time with someone and then your life just turns in a different direction. And then you have to make the choice to leave them behind or take them with you. And you know there are consequences to both these actions, and doing one or the other will change your life forever.”

Jesse once again felt a thousand questions run through her head, and she let out a soft chuckle.

“These responses are still very vague,” Jesse remarked, and Hal gave her a soft smile.

“Sorry,” he laughed lightly and took yet another sip of his wine. Jesse felt his eyes darken as he looked up and down her body across from him. She blushed, then cleared her throat and looked back down at her notes.

“Now, help me figure this out here,” Jesse pressed. “Would you say this happened to you multiple times, or was there one case in particular that really stood out to you and made such a profound impression in your life?”

Hal’s eyes darkened further, and he looked down into his glass of wine, his face somber.

“Just one,” he said softly. Again, Jesse scribbled into her notes. She was quiet for a moment as she looked up at him, her eyes searching his face for any hint of the answers she was looking for.

“Would you …” Jesse started and then cleared her throat a little. “Would you care to elaborate?”

Hal looked up at her, and for a moment, he looked as if he was going to refuse her. Then, he let out a long sigh and ran his hand over his face.

“Sure,” he sighed, letting out a harsh chuckle. “Why not, right?”

Jesse was silent and waited expectantly and somewhat hesitantly for him to continue. Hal released another ragged sigh and finished off his glass of wine.

“It was a woman that I met when I first came out here,” he started, and Jesse carefully took notes. “She was younger than me by a couple of years, and I was already young enough, so I couldn’t imagine what she even thought she was doing. At first, I thought she was absolutely crazy. But as I got to know her better, I started to see things the way she saw them.”

As he spoke, Jesse saw Hal’s eyes glaze over a little as he became completely lost in his memories.

“We lived together in this … just awful little house,” he said, shaking his head, an expression of abject disgust on his face. “It was horrible, but we sort of protected each other, you know? I didn’t want anything bad to happen to her, and she didn’t want anything bad to happen to me.”

Jesse, too, was becoming very drawn into this story, and she put down her pen and notebook. She could tell that Hal really was opening up to her as a person, and for some reason, she felt that she needed to be there for him as an individual, not just as a celebrity in an interview.

“We really only spent the nights in the house,” he explained. “By day, we spent our time out on the streets. I hate to say this, but we ended up committing some crimes. I was an okay criminal, but there was no way I would have made it without her. I really had no need to steal. I was just there for the experience. I could have picked up and gone back home whenever I wanted, to be perfectly honest. But she … she was a professional.”

Hal was silent for a long moment.

“She really was,” he said, shaking his head. “She could pick a pocket clean before you could blink an eye and would just carry on down the street like nothing had happened. Nobody ever suspected her. She would just look through a wallet like it was her own. She’d take the cash, and then drop it. If there were no cash, she’d just try again. It was truly artful. I tried a couple of times myself. Those were the times we ended up running from the cops. But she would never criticize me. She’d just say, ‘we’ll try again tomorrow’, and we could go home, or do whatever.”

Again, Hal was quiet, and he poured himself another glass of wine from the bottle. At about that time, Jesse and Hal both noticed their waiter returning, their food in tow. Jesse’s mouth watered a little at the sight of their meal, a steak with a side of roasted vegetables. She suddenly remembered just how hungry she actually was.

“Perfect.” Hal chuckled across from her. “It’s about time a guy got a break around here.”

Jesse blushed a little, feeling slightly bad about the progress of her interview and just how invasive it was getting. She was having serious doubts about whether she should actually put any of this in her interview. Those were thoughts for later, though, as the scent of her lunch wafted up and filled her nostrils. No sooner had the waiter left than she had gathered up her silverware and taken the first bite of her steak.

Jesse nearly moaned at the flavor that filled her mouth and was suddenly aware of Hal’s eyes on her. She blushed and heard him chuckle.

“I thought you might like it,” he said, his tone low. Jesse looked across the table at him and frowned as she took in the sight of his dark eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Jesse said in a rush. “I know this must be quite painful for you.”

Hal’s eyes flashed with emotion, but he gave her a rueful smile.

“Yes, well ...” He shrugged. “This is what we agreed to, isn’t it?”

Jesse looked down at her plate, collected a forkful of roasted vegetables and began to softly chew them.

“Let’s just finish our meal,” Hal said with a sigh. “And then we can resume our interview. Alright?”

Jesse nodded and gave him a small smile. Hal gave her a smirk and then looked down at the food in front of him. Jesse couldn’t help looking up at him every now and again, and she noted that he made it through another glass of wine as he ate. Eventually, they both finished their meals, and the waiter appeared to clear their plates off the table. Jesse drew up her notebook and waited expectantly as Hal drew a deep drink from his wine.

“Well, on with the show I suppose,” Hal drawled out, his tone darker. “Where were we, again?”

“Um …” Jesse rifled through her memory, as she had stopped taking notes to listen more attentively. “You and your friend were running from the cops?”

Hal laughed long and low.

“My ‘friend’…” he repeated darkly, lifting up his wine glass to catch the dark liquid in the light. He was quiet for a long moment, seeming to contemplate the color of the wine before he finished the glass in a single swallow. He placed the glass back down on the table with a sharp clink, and Jesse couldn’t help flinching at the sound. Hal smiled darkly, seemingly at her reaction.

“Yes, yes.” He sighed, leaning back in his seat. “We were inseparable. We had other friends, of course, but at the end of the day, it really was just us against the world, and that was the way we liked it. Honestly, a part of me wishes that nothing had changed …”

Hal was quiet for another long moment, and Jesse waited silently for him to continue. His eyes looked up at her, and he seemed to regain his focus.

“Nevertheless …” He sighed, waving his hand through the air in a curt gesture. “Things did change. For me, anyway. We were both auditioning all the time, of course, and I was actually getting some attention. I was landing small roles, and eventually, even larger ones. I had a more solid income. To me, it seemed like things were looking up for the both of us. But … she didn’t see it that way at all.”

Jesse felt her stomach sink.

“When I really started to make some money,” Hal continued, “I started renting a nice little apartment. It took some convincing on my part, but I finally got her to go ahead and move in with me. Of course, I was completely in love with her at this point and wanted to make life better for the both of us. I was so intent on creating this new life that I was failing to see that she was very much trapped by her own mentality, and indeed by her own mental disorders. God only knows what they all were, but as I look back, I can plainly see they were there. At the time, though, I was too young and couldn’t have done anything about it even if I had seen it.”

Jesse felt an immense amount of pity for him, and she had half a mind to stop him, not sure if she would like how this story ended up.

“It got to the point where I had developed a stable career,” he said. “Which was wonderful for me, and I have to admit, I was very committed to making a name for myself. That was why I had left home. That was my whole goal. I thought she would be happy for me, but it seemed that she was always discontent. I suppose that’s probably why she never really got out of old habits. She still stole for money, even though we had plenty to eat and drink at the apartment. There was just some part of her that wouldn’t let go of her past situation. One day, I just confronted her about it.”

Hal took a moment to collect his thoughts, and Jesse could see his jaw working as he thought.

“I told her that she needed to give up all of that,” he said. “She needed to just take it easy and let me take care of her and everything else. She lost it. She laughed at me and spat in my face. She accused me of looking down on her and belittling her for her lack of success. I told her that was absurd. It went back and forth for a little while. Eventually, it ended up that she left the house. At the time, I was furious, so I resolved to let her go. She had made her decision, and I had made mine, and that was all fine.”

Hal shook his head and laughed.

“As you probably could have guessed,” Hal continued, “that lasted a grand total of about three days. I would say those were the worst three days of my life, but those days were nothing compared to the weeks and then months I spent looking for her afterward. It’s funny that my career chose that exact moment to escalate when all I really wanted to do was drop everything and find her. In the end, though, I had to make a decision. And in the end … I chose what was best for me.”

Jesse was silent as she took in all that Hal had told her.

“Well,” he sighed. “That’s more than I’ve ever told anyone before. DO you need anything else?”

Jesse took in the sight of Hal. He looked ragged and worn. It reminded her of several scenes from his movie, and she felt a pang of guilt at having inspired such raw emotions from him. Still, she did have one question that was nagging at her.

“So …” she started hesitantly. “You looked for her … but … did you ever find her?”

Hal’s eyes grew distant, and Jesse could tell that he was dwelling on memories that he wished he didn’t have.

“No,” he finally answered her, his tone odd and dark. “I never did.”

Jesse’s heart broke for him. Silently, she looked over at her recording device and pressed the ‘stop’ button. She looked at the device long and hard and pursed her lips. Then, with a deep breath to fortify herself, she moved her hand over and pressed the ‘delete’ button. She knew she was throwing away the article of the century but knew that everything on this recording was far too personal to ever be shared on any record.

Hal, who had been watching her motions the entire time, looked up at her in alarm.

“Whoa there,” he said. “That’s a hell of an article you just deleted there.”

Jesse was silent as she looked up at him.

“Yeah well …” She shrugged. “I can make it work with what I already have.”

The truth was, Jesse didn’t think she could bring herself to relive this heartbreaking story to try and write about it in an article. Hal obviously suspected her true reasoning and smiled at her sympathetically over the table.

“Pretty heavy, right?” he asked, his voice still slurring. “Pretty dark and deep?”

“Yeah …” Jesse answered, feeling her own emotions beginning to sink.

Hal looked over at her, and his eyes narrowed as he searched her face for emotions.

“What are you doing for the rest of the day?” he asked her, his voice filled with quiet urgency.

“Well,” Jesse blinked, taken off guard by the question. “I really should be getting back to work.”

“Take the day off,” Hal pressed her. “Don’t worry; I can have my people smooth things over with Elaine if she starts asking questions.”

Jesse’s mind whirled at the suggestion.

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.” Jesse frowned and shook her head.

Suddenly, Hal reached across the table and lightly clasped her hand in his. Jesse couldn’t contain a gasp as the soft touch sent a spark of electricity through her whole body.

“Come on,” Hal urged her, his voice still a little slurred. “Spend the day with me.”

“I have to get back to work,” Jesse whispered urgently, though her insides were already tingling with excitement at the idea of spending any more time with this incredible stranger.

“Tell me, and be honest with me ...” Hal narrowed his eyes at her and gave her a delightfully playful smirk. “Who exactly is going to notice if you don’t show up for the rest of your workday?”

Jesse thought for a moment, trying to think of any pressing obligations she had, but could find none. In fact, it seemed like her entire schedule had been entirely cleared so that she could focus all her attentions on this article. It appeared, after all, that she was actually free.

“Nobody,” she answered honestly, the idea of skipping the rest of her day seeming more appealing than ever.

“Then what are you waiting for?” he asked her, his eyes dancing with mischief and excitement.

Jesse considered her answer carefully before she gave it.

“Okay,” she breathed out, and a wide grin spread across Hal’s face.

“Excellent,” he said slowly.

Jesse watched as he got up from his seat and moved to her side of the booth. He extended his hand to offer it to her, and Jesse hesitated only a moment before taking it. She wondered briefly about the check but quickly dismissed the thought. He was, after all, Hal Roberts. The restaurant likely trusted him to pay off his bill for a simple lunch.

Jesse felt a mix of anxiety and excitement as Hal led her through the parking garage and toward the car that they had arrived in. He withdrew a key fob from his pocket and clicked a button to unlock the car. After holding the back door open for Jesse, he then went around to the other side to get in.

Jesse watched as he pulled a phone out of his pocket and dialed a number.

“We’re in the car,” Hal said simply, and hung up the phone.

In a matter of minutes, Adam had made his way back to the vehicle and into the driver’s seat.

“Where to?” the burly man asked as he started the engine.

“Well, I’m a little drunk, as you can tell,” Hal said, the twinkle of amusement evident in his voice. “So I propose some place where I can walk this off for a little while. A park, maybe. Have any suggestions, Jess?”

Jesse looked over at him, feeling somewhat taken aback by his sudden use of a nickname.

“Um ...” She blinked, racking her brain for an answer to his question. “I mean, there’s a fairly large park not far from my apartment complex. Not a lot of people actually go there, but I think it’s nice.”

“Well, I suppose I’ll just have to see for myself.” Hal shrugged and sighed, shifting slightly to make him more comfortable in the back seat of the car. “You’ll have to give Adam directions as we go along. I have no earthly idea where we’re going right now.”

So, Jesse directed Adam toward her own apartment complex, and then to the park that was not far away. When they arrived, they pulled into a parking space, and each member of the party got out of the vehicle.

“Go home Adam.” Hal waved his bodyguard away.

“Sir, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Adam protested with a slight shake of his head.

“Oh, relax.” Adam waved him off. “I’ll be fine. Jesse will be with me the whole time.”

Adam looked over at Jesse, and Jesse’s stomach clenched at the responsibility that had suddenly landed on her.