Chapter 35

Jesse

When Jesse fell asleep that night, her dreams were filled with images of Hal. She slept peacefully to the thought of him wrapped around her offering his warmth. She dreamt of his smile and his eyes when they were sparkling with mirth, and when they were burning with lust.

By the time she woke up, she was in dire need of her morning run.

As she ran, she went over all the things he had said to her the previous day. She lingered particularly on Hal’s opinions of Elaine. Did Elaine really just want to put her down so that she couldn’t rise to the top and overtake her one day? The idea began to gnaw at her mind, and by the time she was finished with her run, it was all she could think about.

As Jesse took her morning shower, she dwelled on the thought even more, and she decided that she really couldn’t keep working with Elaine if it was going to be a constant effort on her part to keep her from succeeding.

Jesse also recognized the fact that while it was all well and good to say these things, it was another thing entirely to actually confront someone and give voice to these thoughts. Jesse remembered that yesterday she had been physically ill at the thought of Elaine criticizing her work.

Now, though, Jesse felt invigorated by Hal’s encouragement and his perspective. Why should she allow herself to be treated so poorly, at the cost of her career, while Elaine went untouched? It hardly seemed fair, and as Jesse dressed herself for the day, she resolved to confront Elaine.

When she was finally ready, Jesse stepped outside to find Mark already waiting for her.

“Good morning,” he said tentatively.

“Good morning, Mark,” Jesse smiled at him, and he blinked in surprise.

“I see someone’s feeling better,” her friend remarked, his mouth turning up in a small smile.

“Much better,” Jesse confirmed. “I’m going to talk to Elaine again today.”

Mark was silent for a moment.

“Are you sure?” Mark asked her, his tone reluctant. “I mean, you did that yesterday, and it didn’t turn out so well for you.”

Jesse had to admit that resolve faltered a bit at the reminder. But then she remembered all that Hal had told her, and she felt herself grow confident again.

“I know,” Jesse said. “But I really need to talk to her about my future at The Edge.”

“Your future?” Mark asked, his tone suddenly anxious. “Did she threaten to fire you?”

“No, not at all,” Jesse shook her head. “But if she’s going to try to make sure I stay trapped in obscurity at her magazine, then I will threaten to leave.”

Mark blinked at her again.

“That’s a really bold strategy,” Mark said skeptically.

“Yeah, I know.” Jesse sighed, and she felt some of her own anxieties build up. “But if my career has to die, I don’t want it to be at her hands.”

“Yeah, I can definitely understand that,” Mark snorted.

“I know that you got me the job there,” Jesse said more softly. “And you’ll never understand how grateful I am to you.”

“Jesse, this isn’t about me.” Mark laughed. “If you feel like you need to play your hand, then by all means play it! You don’t need to stay anywhere where you feel manipulated and undervalued. And frankly, that’s how we all feel working for Elaine.”

“So it isn’t just me?” Jesse laughed lightly.

“Not at all,” Mark shook his head with a snort. “She thinks everyone would be absolutely delighted to lick the dirt off her shoes.”

Jesse logged that information away in her mind, just in case it would prove to be useful for her argument with Elaine. Hopefully, they could both be reasonable adults, and it wouldn’t come to low blows. But Jesse knew that Elaine had all sorts of weapons in her arsenal, and Jesse wanted to be equally as prepared.

When Mark and Jesse arrived at the office, they parted ways as usual to go to their separate desks. Jesse felt her heart beating a little faster as she arranged her things on her desk. She knew what she had to do, but she was also not afraid to admit that she was intimidated by Elaine, and she wasn’t going to have an easy time of this. She would definitely have to do a lot of faking and just hope that she would make it.

Soon, they all headed to the morning meeting and got settled in their usual seats. Jesse listened respectfully to the morning briefing. She listed off everyone’s various assignments, and Jesse couldn’t help shrinking a little as Elaine’s eyes fell on her and her mouth twisted into a purely predatory smile.

“And Miss Jesse Clarke,” Elaine paused for a moment as if in thought. “You will head up the article on that riot at the American Idol audition. That’s all!”

At their dismissal, everyone began to rise to return to their desks. Jesse, however, made a straight line to Elaine. Jesse felt her heart pounding, but she was intent on using her nervous energy to power her argument rather than deter it.

“Ms. Beck,” Jesse called out, and Elaine turned around to face her.

“Miss Clarke,” Elaine said silkily. “My, my, we do seem to be spending a lot of time together these days.”

“I need to speak with you,” Jesse said firmly, but still respectfully.

“Is that so?” Elaine raised her eyebrow, and her tone seemed bored. “In the future, I really must insist that you make an appointment like everyone else.”

Jesse ignored the cheap jab and stayed her course.

“I will not waste much of your time, I assure you,” Jesse said, keeping her tone dignified.

“Well, come along then,” Elaine said and headed toward her office.

Jesse’s thoughts raced, and she struggled to wrestle them into order before they reached their destination.

They reached Elaine’s office and Elaine immediately went to her chair and sat down, turning it to face Jesse.

“Well, I’m listening,” Elaine said, crossing her legs and looking up at Jesse with pursed lips.

“Ms. Beck,” Jesse started, keeping her voice strong in spite of her nerves. “Once again, I apologize for the lack of quality on the Hal Roberts article. However, I think that you said things to me that were disrespectful, and upon further consideration, I believe you owe me an apology for them. Furthermore, I don’t think that the Hal Roberts story was significant enough, not even by half, to warrant the importance that you placed upon it. I don’t think that I’ve missed my shot in this line of work. However, I do suspect that you intend to deliberately prevent me from proving my worth by giving me bottom rack stories to dig into. As you can understand, I cannot continue to work in that kind of toxic environment.”

Elaine listened to Jesse’s words with a raised brow, and when she was done, she was silent. Jesse waited, getting more and more nervous each second, but she knew better than to say any more. She had carefully chosen her words, and to add any more would weaken her claim on the argument.

“Well,” Elaine finally spoke and gave Jesse a mocking round of applause. “I’m sure that was very … brave of you to come to me with your feelings.”

Jesse blinked at the condescending tone, but other than that, she gave no evidence that Elaine’s words had harmed her.

“Now, let’s dissect all your little grievances point by point, shall we?” Elaine rose from her chair and began to slowly pace around the room.

“Your apology,” Elaine started, keeping track of the points on her fingers. “I do not accept on the grounds that it wasn’t a real apology based on the fact that you followed it by saying it wasn’t a significant project. Next point. The things I said to you were not rude, they were true, and I will repeat them to you anytime I find necessary. Next point. It doesn’t ever matter what you think because I am your boss, and you do what I say, under any circumstance. I could have you covering rat races if I wanted to. Am I deliberately hindering your career? No. I am merely giving you the level of material with which you can work. That Hal Roberts story was your chance, and you blew it. And honey, if you think you can’t work in this environment, then there’s no way you’d ever survive in an office full of men who won’t give you a damn thing unless their cocks have been in your mouth. So you’d better take your little power trip right back wherever you found it, go back to your desk, and write me an article about that riot. We’re through here. Get out.”

Elaine sat back down at her desk after her tirade, and for the first time, Jesse saw something. Elaine looked frazzled. She looked as though something had been taken out of her. She had seen a little spark of something in her eye—panic that comes from lack of control.

And where Elaine lacked in control, Jesse picked up the slack.

“Ms. Beck,” Jesse said calmly, feeling a warm surge of power course through her. “I regret to inform you that I must leave your employment.”

Elaine looked up at Jesse, and she could see the older woman grinding her teeth.

“Alright,” Elaine said slowly. “I will give you one chance, and only one chance, to retract that statement and go back to your desk and do your job. We will put this entire conversation behind us, and you will continue to get paid a regular, and very reasonable amount of money. Is that clear?”

Jesse allowed a smile to pass over her face, and she delighted in the way that Elaine’s face fell.

“Have a wonderful day, Ms. Beck,” Jesse said simply. “It’s been a pleasure working for you, but our time together is through. I wish you and The Edge all the best.”

With that, Jesse turned and left the office.

Jesse had to work hard not to turn back to get a better look at Elaine’s reaction to her news. Then again, she also had to work hard to keep herself from having a panic attack. She had just quit one of the best jobs she was ever likely to have. She would no longer have a steady source of income, and she was doing it based on the faith she had in a man she had only recently had a full conversation with.

Jesse felt like her life was flipping inside out and upside down all around her. And yet she was completely in control of all of it.

Jesse returned to her desk and gathered up all the meager things she had collected to decorate it with. She was glad she didn’t have a mountain of items on her desk like her coworkers. She was grateful that she could fit everything into her satchel and wouldn’t have to endure the indignity of leaving the office with a cardboard box full of her belongings.

Once she had gathered up all her effects, Jesse headed to Mark’s office to tell him the news. She knocked on his doorframe and waited for him to look up. His brows raised eagerly, and he hopped up from his desk as soon as he saw her.

“Well, how’d it go?” he asked, practically vibrating with excitement.

“I quit,” Jesse said simply, offering him a small smile.

“That’s …” Mark moved his mouth as he searched for the proper words to say. “I … I don’t really know what that is. Jesse, are you sure you made the right move? I’m sure Elaine would forgive you if you …”

“No, she wouldn’t,” Jesse said simply. “She gave me my chance to repent in the office, and I didn’t take it.”

“Wow,” Mark breathed and ran a hand through his hair. “Well … I guess this is goodbye … well, here at the office anyway.”

Jesse laughed.

“I’ll never forget that you got me this job,” Jesse said, moving to wrap Mark in a tight hug.

“I know,” Mark said softly. “But you did your thing here. Now it’s time for you to take off and fly somewhere else.”

Jesse smiled up at Mark, and he smiled back. She was truly thankful to have such a wonderful friend to share life with.

“Maybe you can come over later tonight,” Mark suggested. “That way you can break the news to Tony about your new lease on life.”

“Yeah, that sounds great!” Jesse said enthusiastically.

“I mean, if you’re not celebrating with anyone else, that is,” Mark gave her a sly smile.

“Please,” Jesse rolled her eyes. “That situation is a whole different can of worms.”

“I’m sure,” Mark said sarcastically, and Jesse swatted him playfully on the arm.

“Well, I’d better get out of here.” Jesse sighed. “I’m sure Elaine already has her assistants on the hunt for me to escort me off the premises.”

“You’re probably right,” Mark agreed. “I’ll see you tonight, then?”

“See you tonight,” Jesse confirmed and then set off for the exit of the building.

As Jesse approached the doors that led outside, she felt a rush of exhilaration. She imagined it was the same feeling that a captive animal got when it was finally released back into the wild. The second she stepped outside, she took in a deep breath of fresh air. She felt young and free. A little scared, too, but certainly young and free.

Jesse wondered what she ought to do with all the time she suddenly found on her hands. A part of her felt pressured to immediately go in search of another job. A part of her wanted to just go home and collapse onto her bed. In the end, she simply started walking.

Jesse wandered the city, really taking time to observe and enjoy the various sights and sounds and smells around her. She stopped to pick up a small fruit cup when she got hungry and sat down on a bench to enjoy it. Even when she had finished her small meal and thrown away the package it had come in, she remained on the bench, content to observe the people passing by in front of her.

Jesse found herself thinking of Hal. She pulled out her phone and realized vaguely that she didn’t have his number. She would have to wait for him to call and then put it in herself. She felt a small tingle in her stomach even at the thought of him followed by a small moment of fear. What if he never called her again?

Jesse sighed and shoved her phone back into her satchel. She looked around and suddenly felt weary. She hailed a cab and gave him the address to her apartment. She had already walked what felt like a hundred miles that day. Now, it was time to reward herself with a luxurious bath before she celebrated her newfound freedom with her good friends and neighbors.

Jesse leaned her head back against the headrest of the cab and smiled to herself. She had a bright future. She was young. There was a handsome, thoughtful man in her life. He also happened to be rich and famous, but those were things she could certainly live without.

She smiled deeply and sighed. Life was finally just a little bit brighter.