Chapter Twenty-Two
Alex took his time driving to Lafayette. The sun was on its way back down by the time he pulled up to the Rush house. He parked the SUV, popping his usual dose of Motrin, hoping it would help ease his dull headache.
He got out of the car and walked up the landscaped path to the front porch. He knocked, unsure of what he would do or say.
Alex glanced around the lush neighborhood. The town was nestled away, untouched by the violence and crime of nearby Oakland.
When no one answered, he knocked again. A moment later, Mikael opened the door and peered out at him. Every time Alex saw the man, it didn’t get easier to admit he wasn’t ready to face his fear.
“Yes?” Mikael asked.
“Sir.” Alex swallowed back his nerves. “Is Scarlet here?”
The man hesitated, keeping the door as close to him as possible. “I don’t think she wants to see anyone right now. She’s confused. She feels alienated by you, and I don’t need Edward North sending you here to fetch her.”
“Sir, I—” Alex closed his eyes, pushing back the intruding memories. He didn’t know what to say to the man—this man for whom he felt both contempt for and extreme guilt. He supposed he should thank some higher power it wasn’t Charles Pace himself.
“I’m here because I screwed up. I was hired to protect your daughter. I didn’t… I didn’t count on having such strong feelings for her. I’m here because I owe her an explanation. I want to make it right.”
Mikael carefully looked him up and down. “I think it’s too late for any of that.”
“Please just let me talk to her,” Alex insisted.
There was a long silence as Mikael stared him down.
Scarlet’s voice rose from the doorway. “It’s fine, Dad.”
Alex looked beyond Mikael to Scarlet. He opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but he only succeeded in taking a quick breath. She opened the door farther, listening to the conversation.
“I want to hear what he has to say.”
Alex’s heart skipped when she locked eyes with him. He was brought right back to the hospital room where he first laid eyes on her.
“I’m…” Alex’s throat closed up. With both Scarlet and Mikael staring at him, waiting for him to speak, he couldn’t find the words to say.
Edward said he should tell her how he felt. It was time. He was tired of the regret. If he let Scarlet go, it would be worse than any nightmare he’d endured over the past three years.
Scarlet blinked a few times and she uncrossed her arms. She gently pulled her father back, ushering him away from the door. She stepped outside, closing the door behind her.
“You have five minutes.” She frowned. She kept her attention to the front yard, sporadically looking his way.
“I can’t begin to apologize for my behavior.” Alex stepped closer to her. “I know I lost your trust, but I want to gain it back.”
Scarlet frowned, leaning away from him. Alex thought fast. “Give me more than five minutes. Let’s sit down and talk. No dance studios, no pressure … no distractions. I’ll tell you anything you want to know.”
Scarlet’s face relaxed and she dropped her arms to her sides.
“Unless you’re busy,” Alex shrugged.
Scarlet nodded. “Fine.” She stepped around him, sitting down on the top porch step. “Sit,” she ordered, gesturing to the space next to her.
Alex took a deep breath, doing as he was told, looking out into the peaceful afternoon. The air smelled of fresh-cut grass, and the quiet streets were shaded by London Planetrees. Two laughing children ran down the road with an unleashed dog happily jogging after them. “Did you read the article?” he asked.
“I don’t need to,” Scarlet said. “Barry said enough last night.”
Alex leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. “I’m sorry you had to find out like that.”
Scarlet was close enough for him to touch, but he kept his hands firmly in place. Her breathing elevated, and Alex knew she was trying not to cry.
“My dad told me it wasn’t your fault,” she said. “That you tried…”
Alex squeezed his fists tight. “I don’t know why, but I promised Charles Pace I’d get his daughter to safety. I thought I could…” He stopped, taking in a few breaths to calm himself down. He could smell a hint of rain in the air mixing with the freshly cut grass.
“Were…” Scarlet paused, taking a deep breath. “Were you with her when she died?”
“Yes.”
“Tell me about it,” Scarlet urged quietly.
Alex hesitated, deciding what to say. It wouldn’t do Scarlet any good to hear the gritty details. He went over the events that plagued his mind. “It was a mess. I lost my coms tech to the first blast. He was new to my team … younger kid, named Ricky Carillo. Everything kept going wrong, and I couldn’t calm Lena down.”
Alex paused. Thinking about the ordeal was one thing. Saying it out loud was another. It was like the words physically hurt to pass his lips. “I asked her where she’d rather be if she could be anywhere, and she told me about some bakery in Paris.”
He glanced over at Scarlet, seeing a faint smile.
“Ladurée.” she nodded. “She used to drag me there every day when we’d visit. We had these family summer vacations to France. Lena loved baking.” Scarlet’s gaze lowered and her smile faded. “Then what happened?”
Alex looked back out to the front yard, focusing on the tall orange and red iris that lined the front walk. They looked like little fireworks dancing in the breeze.
“The confusion and shock delayed my thinking,” he said. “I was slow to figure a way out. I honestly thought the worst was over. Lena and I made it to a stairwell. The second missile hit, and I don’t remember anything after that.” Tears pooled in Alex’s eyes. “I woke up a month later in a German hospital. Lance and my mother were by my side. Once I was coherent, they told me that Lena had been killed by the blast, and I barely made it. Lance found me under the rubble, pulled me out, and stabilized me.”
Alex ran a hand up the length of his opposite arm, tracing some jagged tracks on his skin that looked like faded lightening. His words were slow and deliberate. “I hide the scars well. Maybe it’s a metaphor.”
Scarlet reached out, placing a hand on Alex’s knee, letting her tears fall as well. “I’m so sorry.”
Alex closed his eyes for a moment and took in a series of breaths. “Everyone told me I was lucky, but it didn’t feel that way.”
He lifted up his shirt to reveal more scar tissue that snaked from his lower abdomen up to the side of his chest under his arm, and around to his back. Scarlet looked at it with a mixture of growing fascination and sadness.
“Wow,” she breathed. She hesitated before reaching out to touch his skin. Her gentle touch sent a charged shiver of hope down his spine.
“Few surgeries to save my kidney and liver, fix nerve damage, and more than a year of physical therapy with Lance yelling at me to not give up,” he said, pulling his shirt down. “And when all was said and done, Lena was still dead.” He clasped his hands together, letting out a pained laugh. “I realized then that it doesn’t matter how many people you save. It’s the ones you can’t who stay with you.”
Scarlet reached for Alex and placed her hand on his shoulder, gently turning him toward her.
“And I’m sorry every day,” he choked. “She haunts my dreams, and her face makes it so hard to just move on with my life … I only knew her for a few minutes, and I failed her.”
He took Scarlet’s hands in his own, then reached up to touch her cheek. “Edward called me that night you were attacked. I realized who you were, but I had no idea the depth this would take us. I felt this immediate connection. Then, last week, I stood in your room and saw that picture of Lena. I realized you were friends. The guilt came back, knowing my decisions under pressure were what failed. I could have saved her...”
His heart beat faster as Scarlet brought her face closer to his. “You shouldn’t blame yourself for what happened.” She shook her head. “I’m sure Lena doesn’t.”
Alex winced, touching his forehead to hers. “I thought that if I saved you, maybe I’d fix myself, but that’s…”
Scarlet smiled at him. “I don’t need saving, Alex.” She ran a hand down his jaw, and kissed him. He felt the tears that traveled down her cheeks. He never wanted to be the reason she cried. He pulled back a little, looking deeply into her eyes.
“Maybe I do,” he breathed.
Alex pushed his lips onto Scarlet’s as his pulse pounded in her ears. There was so much clarity in that moment. Alex knew he was falling in love. There was no going back.
Alex closed his arms around her and she melted into his embrace. They sat there; tangled in the lasting kiss as if letting each other go wasn’t an option.
****
As night fell and the fog settled in, Alex found himself faced with a big decision.
Stay or go.
Scarlet invited Alex stay for dinner. He accepted, not wanting to go back to the city.
Sarit cooked a large dinner, and set a private table for Scarlet and Alex on the back porch complete with tiki torch lighting. They talked well into the evening. The hard part was over. Alex didn’t need to bring up the article, or the visit with Detective Jackson—it was as if they were two people on a first date with no cares in the world.
“Your mom can make a mean lamb chop,” he told her. “I’m one of those meat-and-potatoes, manly men … who didn’t cry in front of you earlier.”
Scarlet laughed, chewing on a sprig of parsley. “Good to know.”
Alex liked her laugh. He made her chuckle a lot during dinner, and she told him she was surprised to find him funny, laid back, and even charming. He tried not to take offense since he kept his interior locked tight, but it felt good to make her smile.
Scarlet got to her feet, lifted her wine glass, and beckoned to Alex. “I want to show you something.” She smiled.
Alex blinked and nodded before his brain could respond. “Sure.”
He followed Scarlet down the porch steps to where the backyard opened up. He spied the cottage in the back corner of the property.
He stopped and looked around the wide landscape lit with tiny round lights. The backyard was expansive, with various fruit trees and foliage to hide the outside world.
Scarlet opened a sliding glass door. The inside of the cottage was softly illuminated with more strands of twinkling lights. She turned to him and smiled. “In here.”
Alex entered the cottage and scanned the area. It was a picturesque open living area separated by a makeshift partition. The large windows on the far wall and the openness reminded him of beach houses in Malibu, only it wasn’t quite as modern. There was a small kitchen, living room, and a bed with a fluffy down comforter. The room was feminine, with rose-colored walls adorned with black and white photos of family and a dancing child in a tutu.
Alex closed the door and stepped into the room. “Cozy,” he commented. “Who lives here?”
“No one, right now.” Scarlet took a drink of her wine and ran a hand over the kitchen counter. “This was my grandmother’s house, but she passed awhile ago. My cousin A.J. was living here, but he had too many women marching the walk of shame, and it was making my mother uncomfortable.”
Alex reached into a basket on a table near the bed and pulled out a box of condoms. “I see he left a few calling cards behind.”
Scarlet blushed. “College kid.” She shrugged, setting the glass down.
Alex placed the box back where he found it and shook his head.
“Here.” She waved a hand to a makeshift wall. “This is what I wanted you to see.”
Scarlet pushed aside the sliding partition, revealing a much more spacious area. It was a pristine ballet studio, complete with mirrors and a wooden ballet bar that was worn into a soft caramel color. The walls were a soft cream with a pale pink border that matched the color of the ballet slippers that hung delicately from a repurposed hat rack. White Christmas lights were permanently strung across the high ceiling to imitate the night sky. The floor was darker, and worn on the surface—Alex guessed from the dancing that took place. The room reminded him of Scarlet—timeless and enchanting.
“This is where my grandmother taught me to dance.” Scarlet twirled into the room with her arms above her head. “My father moved us back once the war in Iraq started, and she lived here in this bungalow and taught lessons to others while I perfected my technique.”
Alex followed her onto the dance floor. “She sounds nice. What was her name?”
“Shani Udiya … which is also my name, only hers is traditional Hebrew. Shani means ‘scarlet’ and Udiya means ‘Jehovah’s fire.’ My mother likes to call me by my Hebrew name since that’s what my grandmother called me.” She hesitated. “Sorry, I’m talking too much.”
Alex walked to the middle of the room with her. “It’s okay. I like when you talk … and I like when you dance. I’m glad your grandmother taught you.”
He wanted to reach out and touch her, but she turned and lifted her arms elegantly into the air before stepping into a few dance moves for him.
“Développé, one, effacé, two, three and four, plié, relevé…” She moved smoothly, enticing him.
“I wish I spoke your language.” He chuckled.
Scarlet reached for him, running her fingers down his arms to the palms of his hands. His body shuddered with anticipation at her touch.
“You shared who you are with me,” Scarlet said. “So, I want to share who I am with you.”
Alex took a deep breath, inhaling Scarlet’s familiar scent of apple blossom and cinnamon. He became slightly dizzy as he realized what she was really telling him.
She continued to dance, coaxing him to move with her. This time, he found it easier to follow and simply lead her around as she twirled. With each turn, his heart beat faster.
On one of her turns, Alex’s foot got in the way, and Scarlet tripped. She began to fall forward, but Alex caught her hand before she hit the ground and pulled her back up into his arms.
“Good reflexes,” she said.
“Anytime you wanna fall, I’ll catch you,” Alex told her.
She inhaled sharply and searched his face, nodding in understanding. Alex wanted her so badly. He didn’t want to wait any longer.
He turned her around so her back was to him and moved his hands up, making her raise her arms out to the sides. He traced under her arms and guided them up to wrap around his head.
Now he was the one she was dancing with, and no one else was around.
Her shuddering breath was a mixture of shyness and excitement, driving him forward. “That first night,” he whispered. “I watched you dance.”
She nodded, leaning into him. “I remember.”
“It was like watching pure magic.” He moved her hair aside and kissed her neck. She tilted her head, giving him easier access. His kisses trailed her neck until he reached her ear. “Since that night … I’m under your spell. I can’t get you out of my head.”
His chest rose and fell in rhythm with hers. He crossed his arms over the front of her body and pulled her closer into him, letting her know how much he wanted her.
“I can’t get you out of mine,” she told him.
Scarlet turned around to face him. Throwing him a faint smirk, she grasped the bottom of his polo and pulled the shirt up over his head. Alex held his breath for a moment while her hands explored the ridges and scars of his fading war wounds. Scarlet didn’t even flinch as she caressed his skin.
She pulled her hands away from his stomach and quickly relieved herself of her clothes, until she was standing in front of him in only her bra and panties, letting his eyes roam as he took in her body.
Alex focused on her beautifully sculpted body. The tease at the club before was nothing compared to what was standing in front of him now.
His desire surged as he admired her body in the low light. She was breathtaking—so much better than the tease he got the on the busy dance floor of the speakeasy club.
He pulled her in for a kiss, his tongue parting her lips so he could taste her. “I want you,” he said between kisses.
“Take me,” she said, without a hint of hesitation. “I’m yours.”
Alex lifted her up into his arms and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He walked with her in his arms to the queen-size bed, gently lowering her down. Their kisses turned more heated with every passing second. The heat from their bodies burned with every soft touch.
He took his time removing her bra, savoring the moment. Scarlet closed her eyes as his fingers grazed the skin, down her waist to the last thing keeping her from being completely exposed to him. When she was completely bare, he looked down at the flawless body of the ballet dancer—his ballet dancer. He softly caressed her battered feet, working his way up her body.
“You’re beautiful,” he breathed into her skin, causing goose bumps to ignite on her legs.
She smiled at him, lightly tracing her fingers across her own bare breasts. Alex knelt down and scooted her to the end of the bed. He lowered his head between her legs. He felt Scarlet’s muscles tighten as he kissed the inside of her thigh.
His mind raced with the excitement of having her all to himself. No one was there to tell him it was a bad idea—even though it might have been. Alex’s uncertainty was gone, and Scarlet was all that mattered to him, now.
“Alex.” Her voice was a hushed breath, full of want.
He responded by teasing her with his tongue. Scarlet moaned softly and arched her back, giving him full access to what he wanted most.
Alex explored her, hitting all the right spots, making her body writhe beneath him in pleasure. He ran his tongue over her clit, closed his mouth around the swollen bud. Scarlet arched her back, chest heaved, and pulled herself away from his mouth. He stopped to look up at her determined face.
“Please fuck me, Alex,” Scarlet said. “Right now.”
He smiled, rose to his feet while he unbuttoned his jeans. He slid them off, along with his boxers, never taking his eyes off Scarlet’s.
Her eyes widened, and she bit her lip as she took in the sight of him naked in front of her.
Alex threw her a smirk, and grabbed a condom from the basket. He kissed her, soft and slow, as he fixed it into place. Scarlet’s fingers twisted in his hair, and she wrapped her legs around his body, giving herself to him.
Alex lifted his head to look into her eyes. He wanted to see her, to watch her, as he solidified the moment they would both remember forever. Just the two of them. Just this moment.
Scarlet’s crystal blue eyes held him captivated, piercing his soul, securing the fact that he was now hers and she was his.
She let out a gasp as he entered her. Her fingers tracing his neck, she pulled him in for a hard kiss, as he slowly began to thrust in and out.
Alex’s mind broke as he connected with Scarlet and all of his recent troubled thoughts faded.
Her nails dug into his back and he thrust harder, making her lean her head back and let out a pleasurable moan. He kept going, building up his momentum, and willed the moment to never end.
Her breathing became more and more ragged as she grinded her body against his, desperately wanting her. They remained in their rhythmic dance as they both chased the release they both wanted so badly.
Scarlet shuddered under him, calling out his name in whispered breath against his sweaty skin. She cried out and arched her back, making Alex rush to come as well. The intense orgasm rose suddenly, almost catching him off guard. He groaned, and tensed his arms as he held himself over her, the pulsing of his heart pounding in his ears.
A moment later he lowered himself to the bed, and kept Scarlet firmly in his embrace.
They both breathed hard, entwined in their lovemaking. He placed a hand on her cheek, feeling the thin layer of sweat. He touched his forehead to hers and kept his gaze firmly locked with hers.
Those eyes, he thought. He could lose himself in them forever.