BY THE END of the school day, rumors of a start-of-summer party had spread like wildfire over the school. The tiny detail of it being my birthday was all but lost as the news made the rounds. The various reasons being given for the party were both amusing and alarming. They ranged from rich parents out of town, to an about-to-go-to-jail party, to a dying kid’s last request to have a good time. The only thing that people were consistently getting right was my address; that was one detail nobody was messing up. The guest list was already massive, and there was still plenty of time before the party for extra guests to be invited. Shit. If the police were called because a mob showed up for my birthday, it might be my last birthday. Nika was going to piss herself laughing over this one.
On the bright side, the party gave me something to look forward to—one last chance to spend time with Arianna. I was on cloud nine when school ended, and I hadn’t expected to feel that way today. Both Trey and Raquel noticed my unusually perky mood.
Trey gave me an odd look as we sat on the steps leading into the gym. He was using his foot to push his skateboard back and forth on the cement; the wheels made a grinding sound like the mortar and pestle my grandmother used to mash herbs. “You high, man? ‘Cause I didn’t think you smoked.”
I pushed him away from me, into Raquel. “Just having a good day. Is that a crime?”
Raquel laughed as she dodged Trey’s body. “No, not a crime, but definitely weird coming from you. Especially lately. Your mood seemed to be getting darker and darker with summer approaching, but now you’re all rainbows and sunshine.”
She gave me a mocking smile that made me want to push her away too. I would have, if she was within reach. “The day turned out better than I thought, and I have good things on the horizon. That makes me cheery.”
I spotted Arianna walking toward her house on the other side of the graveyard and immediately leapt to my feet. “I’m gonna walk Arianna home. Catch you guys later.” I ran off to the sound of Trey wishing me good luck.
When I caught up to Arianna, she was already passed the first few rows of headstones. It irritated me that she was walking home after school now. I used to drive her when we were together. Nika had thought that was ridiculous since she lived so close to the school, but I’d wanted whatever excuse I could use to spend more time with her. And besides, she shouldn’t have to walk through a cemetery alone. Even to me that was a little creepy.
“Arianna, wait up!”
She turned when she heard my voice and I nearly choked on my breath. She was so beautiful. Her hair was more golden in color than it had been when we were together; there were streaks of blonde mixed with the creamy brown. She was growing it longer too. Last fall it had been in a cute, shoulder-length bob, but now it was approaching her mid-back. It was thick and luxurious, and I just wanted to tangle it around my fingers. I stuffed my hands into my coat pockets instead.
A strange expression crossed her face as she stared at me. The look was both intrigued and amused. “You don’t have to keep walking me home, Julian. I can walk a hundred yards by myself, you know.”
I grinned at her often repeated remark. “I know. You can do anything you set your mind to.”
As I gazed at her, my heart seeped into my eyes. I knew I shouldn’t let it, since we weren’t at that level yet, but I couldn’t stop the reaction; she meant the world to me. Arianna shifted her gaze to the ground, like seeing the adoration on my face made her uncomfortable. Knowing I needed to keep the mood casual, I closed my eyes and inhaled a cleansing breath, mentally clearing the love from my demeanor. Look normal, act normal. “So…new neighbor, huh?” I asked, opening my eyes.
Arianna coughed into her hand, and then looked up at me; there was a slight cringe to her face, like she was embarrassed to talk about another boy with me. “Yeah… His dad homeschools him, so he doesn’t get to hang around kids his age much. Mom thought it would be a good idea if I made him feel welcome…” Her voice trailed off and she kicked at a pebble on the ground as her gaze once again returned to her feet.
Hating the awkwardness I felt building between us, I tried to be mature and understanding. It was difficult. “That’s…really nice of you. I’m sure he…enjoys your company.” I know I did.
Arianna locked eyes with me, and that was when I realized just how much longing I’d imbued in that sentence. So much for causal. “Julian, do you…?” My heart sped up as I considered just what she might be about to ask me. Do I like you? Yes. Do I want to be with you? Yes. Would I do anything for you? Yes.
Her mouth snapped shut and her lips compressed into a tight smile. Clearly, she wasn’t ready to open that door yet, and a huge part of me was relieved that she wasn’t. Just her asking the question would forever alter what we were, and while I wanted out of this limbo, I wasn’t positive she’d be happy to hear that I had feelings for her—or that she’d reciprocate them. We weren’t there yet.
“Will you be at my party?” I asked, hoping I could successfully change the subject.
Relief lightened her face. “Ummm yeah, I was thinking about going. It should be fun.”
“Great,” I told her, keeping my smile contained to a small grin. Great? More like freaking amazing, but I didn’t want to scare her off by saying that.
As silence fell between us, we continued walking through the cemetery to her house. When we were in her back yard, I finally said, “I really hope you come to the party. Maybe we’ll get a chance to talk…so we can, you know, get to know each other better, since we…haven’t known each other long.” Sadness crept over me as I traipsed across her lawn. We’ve known each other for years, you just don’t remember.
A strange, contemplative look crossed her face. “Yeah…although sometimes, it seems like I’ve known you longer than I actually have.”
Shock made me stand still. Arianna stopped with me, and she again looked embarrassed. “What do you mean?” I asked. Did she remember me?
Arianna frowned, and her brows furrowed in an adorable way. “Nothing, it’s just…a feeling, I guess.” She looked around her yard before continuing. “I know this is going to make me sound crazy, but I have these…blanks in my memory, these holes, and no matter how hard I try, I can’t remember what happened to me in those gaps. And when I try to fill the hole with something plausible, nothing feels right—like I’m trying to jam a square through a circle. But when I’m around you…it feels like, somehow you fit in those gaps…like…you’re the circle.” Her cheeks filling with color, she quickly stammered, “I don’t know why I feel that way, and I don’t know what it means, and like I said, it’s just a gut feeling I get sometimes, and it really freaks me out, and I can’t believe I told you about it…and now you think I’m nuts, don’t you?”
The fact that she was worried about my opinion of her made me feel like I could fly. But what she’d just said… If Halina hadn’t replaced every single one of her memories with something else, and she hadn’t been inside with her long enough to do that, then the “holes” Arianna was talking about made complete sense. The gaps would fade with the natural aging process, but right now, she must be really confused. And miraculously, somehow, her body, her emotions, her heart…a part of her knew that she should know me. It made it incredibly hard for me to not kiss her, to not tell her I loved her—to not tell her everything.
I couldn’t though, so all I said was, “I don’t think you’re crazy. I think there’s a lot in this world that can’t be explained. And who knows, in another life, maybe we did know each other.” In another life, that was just a few months ago.
Arianna smiled, and looked genuinely relieved that I hadn’t rejected her. How could I, when she’d finally opened up to me? “Have a good summer, Julian. I’ll see you…at your party, I guess.”
My beaming smile couldn’t be held back this time. “Yeah…see you then.”
I jogged back to my car with a bounce to my step. This was the best day ever. Okay, maybe not ever, but it was definitely the best since “The Wiping”, which was how I referred to that awful moment when my grandmother had obliterated my girlfriend. That day had cast a shadow over my young life, but slim beams of light were shining through the cracks now, and I was going to grasp at that frail hope as strongly as I could. I was going to get her back.
I drove home faster than I should have, but luckily I didn’t run into any cops. I wanted as much time as possible to make a good impression on my parents. I would need them pliable if they were going to agree to this party. Parking the car in my typical spot, I started in on operation Good Son. After tossing my stuff in the house, I opened all four car doors and started pulling out the garbage that had accumulated over the school year. It was disgusting, and I made a mental note to clean out my car more often. There were French fries ground into the carpet, takeout bags everywhere, and about a tree’s worth of old assignments that I’d tossed out of my bag while digging around for other stuff. There were even a couple of half full bottles of juice that, judging by the amount of white fuzz growing in them, I knew I’d better not accidentally open. No wonder Mom always asked me to clean the car out, and Nika cringed whenever she got inside.
After my car was in order, I headed into the house and started in on my bedroom. It was almost as bad as my car—not quite, since I’d been keeping it clean for a good chunk of the year, but pretty close. At least my room didn’t have any science experiments growing in it, just one glass of milk on my nightstand that was starting to curdle. My room smelled a thousand times better once I tossed it out. Mom must have been leaving it there to prove a point. Or she was overcompensating in other areas besides overfeeding me. She’d been cutting me a lot of slack lately.
I was vacuuming the living room when I felt my parents coming home. Hurrying to finish before they arrived, I moved lightning-fast over the carpet. I probably wasn’t cleaning it very thoroughly, but the track marks of the machine would at least make it seem like they were clean. And at the moment, the illusion was good enough.
When I shoved the vacuum cleaner into a closet, my sister yawned and asked, “What are you doing, Julie? You don’t clean. Ever.” The suspicion in her voice was clear as day.
“What? Can’t a guy help out?” I asked, frowning at the floor.
Nika laughed. “A guy, yes. You, no. What’s going on?”
I fluffed a pillow on the couch instead of answering her. The old leather couch that had been my father’s for an eternity, or so it seemed to me, had recently been stained beyond repair by massive amounts of blood. The new couch was black leather. Mom said it was much easier to keep clean than white. I had to agree, since a couple of swipes with a damp cloth had wiped away all the slight blemishes on the surface. I hoped it was okay to use water on leather. I really had no idea.
As I was rearranging the couch pillows for the umpteenth time, Nika grunted in frustration and said, “Stop ignoring me, and tell me what’s going on.”
Happy with the pillows, I turned my attention to the kitchen. I had just enough time to do the dishes and wipe off the counters. “I need Mom and Dad to agree to something, so I’m buttering them up.”
“Agree to what?” Nika said cautiously.
I pursed my lips at the floor. “Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”
I could almost hear Nika folding her arms across her chest. “Dead or not, I don’t need eighteen hours of sleep a night. I’m just waiting out the sun.” Her voice faltered at the end and I stopped my sour face. Summer meant longer days, and that meant Nika had to be holed up in her bedroom for even greater stretches of time. Yet another argument she’d tried to use on our parents, so they’d let her stay at the ranch. She’d at least have more room to walk around if she was living there.
Looking around the kitchen, I considered what to do. My sister was obviously lonely…the clean dishes in the dishwasher and the small specks of food on the counter could wait. And besides, I could explain about the party better face to face anyway. “Hold on, I’m coming down.”
“Okay,” she whispered.
The entrance to Nika’s hidey-hole was buried in a huge hall closet that wrapped under the stairs. I stepped inside, then closed the door behind me. Even though it was bright outside, the seal around the door was tight, and the closet was dark. Up until recently, we’d stored all of our winter coats in here. Shoving them aside every day to get to the back had quickly annoyed Nika, so Mom had moved the coats to the garage. I flipped the light switch, and then blinked in the sudden brightness. The bare bulb illuminated the empty clothing rod and the shelves behind it holding games, various odds and ends, and all the supplies that we kept in here. There were bags of dog food under the shelves, and the closet smelled like kibble because of it, a fact that Nika constantly complained about. Our old pup was upstairs right now, snoring away at the foot of my parents’ bed with a wheeze that made me wonder if this would be his last summer.
At the back of the closet, where the stairs above made the roof slant, there was a break in the carpet that was seamless to human eyes, but clear to a vampire. Carefully, I pulled up on a long, shaggy strand of carpet. It came up easily, along with the particle board it was glued to. I held the carpeted cover in one hand as I stared into the dark hole where my sister lived. Aligning the board in my hand with the entrance, I jumped into the hole. The cover hit the rim of the opening, sealing the hole, while I continued on with a soft thud to the ground several feet below it. I smiled as I looked up at the now-closed entrance. I was getting better at closing it like that. The first few times I’d tried, the wood hadn’t been lined up right, and I’d had to grab the chair nearby so I could reach the cover and manually put it in the correct position. The opening always needed to be shut in case someone opened the closet door. It was just one of the many protections against light that was down here.
With the entrance sealed, the small room was pitch-black. While I waited for my eyes to adjust, Nika said, “Door closed?”
Even though she couldn’t see me, I nodded. “Yep. You’re clear.”
A wooden door to my left squeaked open and phosphorescent light brightened the darkness. Seeing my sister with glowing eyes was still startling to me, but I was getting used to it. I was getting used to her pale skin too. And the chill that emanated from her. With wavy brown hair and deep brown eyes buried beneath that unnatural glow, Nika reminded me of Mom. She didn’t have Mom’s current melancholy though. Nika had adapted well to her new life, mainly because of her sire, Hunter.
Nika’s lips turned into an amused smile as she glanced at the cover. “You lined it up right on the first try this time. You’re getting better at that.”
I smirked at her, then pointed to the door that led out of this small, 6x9 room. “Let’s go before someone opens the closet door.” I knew we’d both hear and feel someone approaching before they could get anywhere near the door, and they’d feel and hear us too and wouldn’t approach until it was safe, but now that I was down here with Nika, I couldn’t wait to tell her about my day.
Nika seemed to understand and left the room without comment. Even though our emotional bond was gone, we’d been connected for so long that sometimes we could still tell what the other was feeling with just a glance. It helped me still feel close to her.
Outside the room Nika playfully called the “foyer” was a cement tunnel that led to the only other room down here, Nika’s bedroom. It was technically part of the crawlspace under the house; the home had been designed with an unusually deep one. From what Dad said, that was the real reason he’d wanted to buy the place from the owners. He’d known he could easily convert the crawlspace into a vampire-safe hideout. He’d never planned on anyone staying down there full-time, but it had all worked out in the end.
Dad had dug out the crawlspace to make it even deeper, so no one had to stoop while visiting. Then he’d used a ton of cement to create the enclosed “foyer,” hallway, and Nika’s bedroom. The room within a room was completely impervious to sunlight.
The air down here was stale, musty. The only time it was refreshed was when the series of doors into the crawlspace were opened. That made it uncomfortable to be down here if you still needed to breathe, but Nika didn’t, so it didn’t matter. She hated the smell though.
Nika’s room here was bigger than her room upstairs, but all of the concrete made it seem smaller. Plus she was stuck in here a lot, so that made it feel even tinier. Her bed took up most of one wall, with a nightstand beside it. A bookcase, table, and six-drawer dresser occupied the rest of the space. A laptop was open on Nika’s bed. Luckily, she could get a bit of Wi-Fi signal down here. It wasn’t very strong though, and constantly crapped out on her.
Exposed pipes and air ducts were running here and there beneath the house, sometimes straight through the cement wall of Nika’s room. The openings were slathered with sealant, blocking off any light potential, but the pipes detracted from the homey feel of the space. They were noisy too. Whenever someone took a shower, flushed the toilet or did laundry, it sounded like a hurricane in here. Yet another reason Nika wanted to move out.
Looking a little stir-crazy and eager for news, Nika sat on her bed and scooted toward the middle. I smiled at the look on her face, and sat on the edge of her mattress. Dad had run power and cable down here for Nika, and she had a couple of lamps turned on, bathing the room in a soft glow. There was a flat-screen TV bolted into the thick cement opposite her bed, and a mini-fridge full of blood. On top of the fridge was a small microwave for warming it up. Warm blood was infinitely better than cold.
Closing her computer and tossing it on top of her pillows, Nika crooked me a smile and said, “Okay, before they get home, spill it. Why are you doing things that go against your very nature? And did I seriously hear you cleaning out the car earlier?”
I gave her an annoyed expression that clearly portrayed my appreciation of her assessment of my “nature.” Smoothing my face, I leaned forward, eager to tell her. “Okay, I need your help. I need to convince Mom and Dad to let us have a birthday party.”
She blinked at me. “We always have a party for our birthday.”
Shaking my head, I told her, “No, a party party. With friends.”
She twisted her lips. “I’m sure they’ll be fine with a couple people. They usually are.”
I sighed. Yeah, I knew that. Trey and Arianna had gone to every party we’d had since we’d started high school. What I wanted was a lot more than a couple of friends though. “No…I’m thinking more along the lines of…the entire school.”
Nika stared at me a second, then she started laughing. I smacked her shoulder when she wouldn’t stop. Wiping her eyes, she told me, “Oh, sorry. I just…” she laughed again, “…Mom and Dad will never agree to a party that big.”
Gauging our parents’ distance, I mumbled, “Well, I sort of already invited everyone…”
Nika stopped laughing. “You…what? Without asking Mom and Dad? They’re going to flip. They’re going to make you cancel. They’re going to ground you for a month.”
I rolled my eyes, but she had a point. “I need this to happen, so…how do I get them to say yes?”
Leaning forward, elbows on her knees, Nika narrowed her eyes at me. “Why do you need…?” Tilting her head, she said, “Is this about Arianna? Did she agree to go to your party? Is she…interested in you?” I could hear the hope in her voice. It matched mine. Nika wanted Arianna back, almost as much as I did.
Praying this was just the thing Arianna and I needed to get back on track, I told Nika, “I don’t know if she’s interested in me in that way…but she agreed to come, and that seems like a good sign. I need this to happen, Nick. It might be my only chance this summer to get her to see me as more than a friend.”
Nika let out a long breath of chilly air. “Okay. Then we need to think of a way to get Mom and Dad on board.”
Just then, the squeak of Dad’s tires rolled up the driveway. The engine stopped and car doors opened and shut. Nika and I both swiveled our heads to look up at where our parents were. “Well, put your thinking cap on,” I whispered. “They’re here.”
I hopped up off the bed and started jumping up and down as nerves washed over me. This wasn’t good. I needed to calm down before I faced my parents. They’d hear and smell my distress before I got anywhere near them, and I wanted to seem calm and confident—like an adult asking for a simple favor, not a teen asking for a party.
Nika stood and grabbed my hand. I relaxed with her icy touch. Her presence was so soothing that for a minute, it was almost like we were still connected. “Wait until I come up to ask,” she whispered.
Our parents were close now, opening the front door. I could hear them laughing, but couldn’t hear what they were talking about. Not quite enhanced enough for that. I nodded at Nika, gave her a quick, one-shoulder hug, then left her so I could head back upstairs. I hoped I could hold out long enough for Nika to join me. I had a feeling she could phrase it in a way that might sway our parents. I’d probably just blurt it out, then start begging when they shut me down.
When I got to the room under the closet, I closed the door to the hallway, instantly darkening the transitional space. Unfolding the chair against the wall, I carefully stood on the cushy foam seat and popped open the lid covering the entrance. Hazy light filtered into the dark room, making it easier for me to see. I easily jumped up into the closet, then replaced the cover over the hole in the floor. I sighed as I looked back at it. Such a dark, dank, musty place. Being tucked under the house was no way for a person to live, vampire or not. Nika belonged at the ranch now, and hopefully Mom and Dad would realize that soon.
As I was still contemplating my sister’s life, Dad’s voice carried over to me through the closet door. “Julian? Mind coming here?”
Inhaling a deep breath, I replied, “Yeah, be there in a sec.”
Rolling my shoulders to loosen up my tight muscles, I opened the closet door and stepped out to see both parents standing in front of me. Dad was giving me a curious expression while Mom was frowning. Wondering why they looked suspicious already, I shrugged and asked, “What?”
With a straight face, Dad said, “It smells like pine in here. Did you clean?”
“Uh…” I wanted to drop my eyes, kick a non-existent stone on the floor, but I couldn’t do either of those things or my parents would be on me in a flash. Just keeping my heart rate even was a challenge. Guess I overdid it on the cleaning. I should have drawn the line at mopping the entryway…
Trying for casualness, I threw on as charming a smile as I could manage. “I spilled something, so I cleaned it up. That’s what you’re always asking us to do, right?”
Now Dad frowned as well as Mom. “Yeah, but you never actually do it.” He nodded his head toward the living room. “You spill something in there too?”
With a raised eyebrow, Mom added, “And in your car?”
I looked over both of my protective, suspicious parents while I contemplated what to say. I was a spitting image of Dad—light blue eyes, dark black hair, and a smile to stop traffic, or so Mom said, and Nika was a carbon copy of Mom—same mahogany hair, same warm brown eyes, same fierce devotion to her loved ones. We definitely shared the same DNA.
Not wanting to rush my request, I spread my hands and slapped on an insulted expression. “What? A kid can’t be nice and clean a little for his family without getting the third degree? I do like helping out every once in a while, you know?”
My parents glanced at each other, then back to me. Dad smiled, and I began to think that maybe I’d taken that argument just a touch too far. “Good to know,” he told me. “I’ve been meaning to clean out the garage again. You can give me a hand.”
A groan inadvertently escaped me. Yeah, I’d massively overplayed the I’m-just-being-helpful card. Dad was on to me, but I wasn’t cracking. Not yet. Not until Nika was upstairs to work her magic on our parents.
Dad’s smile grew at seeing the irritation on my face. He clapped his hands together. “No time like the present.”
Mom rubbed his arm. “I’ll get started on dinner while you get started on sorting that mess.”
I accidentally groaned again. “Mom, no more food…please. There are enough leftovers in there to feed about twenty vampires.”
Mom pursed her lips, but nodded. “All right, fine. I’ll give Tracey a call instead…see how she’s doing today.”
Tracey was Mom’s best friend from back in San Francisco. She was married to our symbolic Uncle, and Dad’s best friend, Ben. To save his crumbling marriage, Ben had told Tracey everything about vampires, and everything he did for them. And he helped with a lot of dangerous stuff for us. He’d been beaten on, thrown against walls, nearly bitten, and not too long ago, shot in the head. Tracey was more than a little stressed over all of the new truths she’d discovered lately. She still shook whenever anyone in my family talked to her, Mom included.
Mom took Dad’s briefcase and started heading upstairs to make her phone call. Along the way, Nika chirped, “Good morning, Mom, Dad.” It was a far cry from morning, but in Nika’s world, it wasn’t even dawn yet.
Mom smiled down at where her daughter was hiding. “Good morning, Nika.” She laughed after she said it, which I thought was a good sign. She’d shaken off a bit of her melancholy since this morning.
The family dog was waddling down the stairs as Mom walked up them. She reached down and stroked his grey muzzle as he inched his way past her. Spike gave her a quick lick, then continued on his journey to Dad. His nails clicked on the hardwood floors, and his long tail made a slow swish back and forth. It was about as excited as the ancient collie got nowadays.
Dad sank to his knees as Spike trudged over to him. Wrapping his arms around his neck, he rustled his fur. “Hey, boy, you didn’t need to come all this way to greet me. I know those stairs are tough for you.” Dad placed both of his palms on Spike’s right hip; he often limped on that leg. Maybe it was my imagination, but I swear Spike smiled as Dad’s chilled skin soothed his aches. Sometimes being really cold came in handy.
As I watched the labored way Spike breathed, the way his back dipped, and the way his body lightly shook with fatigue, a sad thought hit me. I unknowingly said it out loud. “He’s not going to be around much longer.”
Dad looked up at me with a forlorn expression. “I know. I figure two or three more months is all he’s got left in him.” Dad shifted his eyes back to Spike. “I can smell it. But it’s a miracle he’s lasted this long. I swear he’s set a record.” Dad smirked and rubbed Spike’s back.
Spike had been a part of the family longer than I had. The thought of him not being in the house anymore was hard to imagine. “Maybe Nika can turn him?” I suggested, only half-joking.
Dad raised an eyebrow in classic Dad-fashion. “We’re not making the dog a vampire.”
I heard Nika snort downstairs as I shrugged at Dad. “Has anyone ever turned a pet? Maybe we should ask Gabriel what would happen.”
Standing, Dad clapped my shoulder. “We’d have a rabid dog biting the neighbors, and that’s way too much cleanup work for Nika and Great-Gran.”
“And Hunter,” Nika added. He was a pureblood vampire too.
Dad sighed as he looked at where Nika was below him. “And Hunter.” Raising his eyes to Spike, who was now lying on the floor with his head on his paws, Dad murmured, “Spike will live and die a natural life…as he was meant to.” From the way he said it, I got the feeling he was talking about more than just the dog. None of us were going to live and die naturally. Well, I supposed I still had that option, if I took Gabriel’s shot that would keep me alive. I really hadn’t decided yet though, and I had plenty of time to do that. My future was still wide open to me. Unlike my sister. Dad and I glanced at each other, then back at the floor, and I knew we were both thinking the same thing: she’d died too young.
At hearing Dad say his name, Spike thumped his tail twice, but didn’t get up. I didn’t blame him. He was about a bazillion years old in human years. Hoping Dad had forgotten about the garage, I started inching my way toward the living room. Dad cleared his throat and smiled. “It’s this way.”
I started to groan in protest, but then I stopped myself. I wanted to appear like an adult so Dad would take me seriously. Whining wasn’t very adult-like. Although, I’d seen more than my fair share of adult temper tantrums. I slapped on a smile as I rubbed my hands together. “Okay, let’s do this!”
Dad narrowed his eyes at me. “Whatever you’re up to, I hope it’s worth it.”
I rolled my eyes at Dad like he was ridiculous, but on the inside my emotions were doing jumping jacks. Yes, she’s worth it, Dad. She’s worth all of this and so much more.