Ava hardly recognized the female staring back at her from the full-length mirror attached to the armoire. The white translucent tone of her skin allowed the network of veins to peek through from beneath, while the stark blue of her eyes had begun to dull. The usual shine and thickness to her hair seemed unruly, and frizzier than usual.

Whatever post-coital glow she’d been blessed with the last few days had surely faded away.

Calix hadn’t said a word about it, thank goodness. Even after four straight days of sex, his appetite hadn’t seemed to wane, his lust for her unshaken by her noticeably changing appearance.

Perhaps she needed some time outside. Her human half afforded her the ability to tan, and with the late spring sun shining through the window, she decided that might just be the cure for whatever had taken hold in the last week.

Slipping on one of the tanks she’d picked out with Anna, and a pair of cut-off shorts, she nabbed the blanket she’d pulled from the closet and a pair of sunglasses, making her way out of the dark bedroom. As a teenager, her favorite pastime had been lying in the sun and reading. Unlike most of the supes, who preferred the cover of night, Ava enjoyed daylight, loved the warmth and the outdoor activities Ryke had rarely allowed her to partake in. Some Nephilim chose the nocturnal life and ridiculed the ones who didn’t.

She’d once tried waterskiing with a friend and spent a night at the lake, and she’d paid the price when she’d snuck back home. Ryke had made a point to torment her, by slapping and scratching her already-painful sunburn, while calling her a whore for the bikini she’d worn.

Calix would never say, or do, something so cruel.

The thought of him brought a smile to her face as she descended the marble staircase. She’d never been a stranger to opulence, as her brother had always sought to impress, but the demons had genuine class. The art and furnishings of the mansion expressed the exquisite taste each of the brothers possessed, whereas her brother had always gone for flashy and gaudy as hell.

Anna rounded the corner, as Ava passed through the foyer toward the back entrance, and the smile on the plump female’s face quickly faded to a tight pinch of concern. “Ava, dear, are you getting enough blood? You’re looking slightly pale, love.”

“Yes, I’ve increased my blood intake in the last few days. Calix brought fresh bags of it and urged me to snack during meals. I think I just need some fresh air and sunlight.”

“Well, you’re sure to get plenty of it out there today! Gorgeous outside. Might take the laundry out to dry on the lines.”

“I’m looking forward the warmth. Can I help you with the laundry?”

“Oh, you are a sweet dear, but no.” Anna shooed her away with a chuckle. “Get out there and enjoy it.”

“Okay, but if you change your mind, I’m pretty decent at folding fitted sheets.”

“I shall keep that in mind.” Anna tottered off down the hall, with a quiet hum and a skip in her step.

Through the long hallway, Ava finally reached the back door, and the moment she opened it, the invited blast of air scarcely cooled her face with the pounding rays of heat quickly stamping it out.

Too hot. Too damn hot!

As if something had peeled back her skin and exposed her insides, the sun she loved so much had quickly become the enemy and bore down on her from the cloudless sky.

She shuffled across the patio, finding shade beneath a gazebo, where Calla sat nursing the baby on a luxurious couch with plush pillows and a thin blanket.

“I’m sorry,” Ava whispered, trying not stare at the half of her breast she could see over the baby’s head.

“It’s okay.” Calla smiled and waved her over. “Come sit with me.”

“It won’t … disturb the baby?”

“Not at all.”

Disappointed that she couldn’t sit in the sun, Ava sulked over, taking a seat on an equally plush chair across from Calla, who discreetly tucked her breast back into her shirt and stroked the baby’s head.

“She looks so content.” Ava kept her voice low, smiling at the tiny bundle curled into her mama’s chest.

“I’ve always heard horror stories about newborns and parents never getting to sleep.” The adoration in her eyes as she caressed the baby’s crown spurred an ache in Ava’s heart. That she would never have the opportunity to cradle one of her own someday needled the hollow there. “She sleeps all the time, rarely cries, and loves to cuddle. She’s like, the perfect baby.”

“She really is,” Ava agreed, studying the absolute roundness of the baby’s head and the healthy glow of her skin.

“Thank you.”

A menacing growl tingled down Ava’s spine, and she turned to find Gavin’s hellhound, Magnus, baring its teeth from where the dog stood just a few feet from her. At Ava? Surely not. On the few occasions she’d come with Calix to the mansion, the hounds had always seemed to adore her.

“Magnus? What’s up, buddy? Come here.” At the patting of her hand, the dog barked, and Ava turned to see the baby startle against Calla. His growls intensified, turning to snarls.

Her instincts told her to get up and move away. Before she had the chance, Calla stood, cradling the baby in her arms and waved them off.

“Shoo! Back off!”

The hound’s snarls turned to a whimper, and it paced in its spot, as if reluctant to follow her command. Hellhounds didn’t tend to have the same body structure as domestic dogs. Their long bodies and predatory behaviors almost gave them the appearance of a large cat.

“Magnus! Go on! Go away!” Calla edged closer to the dog, and it finally tucked in its head and bounded off toward the woods.

“I don’t understand.” Ava shook her head, watching the dog disappear into the dark cover of trees, but its red eyes, still visible, told her he continued to survey from a distance. “I’ve wrestled and played with the hounds. I thought we were cool.”

“Don’t feel bad.” Calla sat back down on the couch, setting the baby on her chest, and she nuzzled her face into the crook of her neck. “Before the baby’s blood really started to circulate, I came out here with Logan, and I swore those dogs wanted to tear me apart. I think they sensed the Sang virus. Viewed me as a threat.”

Of course. Though Calla most likely didn’t know Ava was infected, what she said made sense. “Do you ever crave blood?”

Tracing a finger over the baby’s crown, Calla shook her head. “Not as much anymore. I think the hunger is always there. I know the virus is still inside of me, but the baby’s blood circulating in mine weakened it. I can sit in the sun and everything now.”

Which explained why Ava had felt like her skin was peeling away from her while exposed.

“The pregnancy cured you, then?”

“It didn’t cure me, no. It just … let me live with the benefits, while lessening the bad parts of the disease.”

Disease. Ava hated the crippling sound of the word.

Running her thumb across her lip, Ava sat quiet a moment. She’d not told anyone except Calix about the virus, mostly because she felt shamed, dirty, ruined. If anyone could relate to her, though, it was Calla.

“I, um …. I was kidnapped by a human and his demon sidekick. They kept me in an underground prison for months. Giving me injections. I found out I was being prepped for the Sang.”

Calla’s brows lifted, her expression filled with concern. “You’re infected, then.”

Gaze locked on her fidgeting hands, Ava nodded. “Soiled. Tainted. Ruined. Yes. I’ll never bear a child of my own after what they did to me.”

“Oh, Ava, I’m so sorry.”

“No. I’m the sorry one. This is my penance for what I did to you. That was unforgiveable.”

Calla shook her head so hard, Ava lifted her gaze. “What you did isn’t deserving of what they did to you. And I do forgive you.”

The itch of tears softened with Calla’s words. “Thank you.”

“Alexi soldiers are supposed to be sterile, did you know that?”

“I didn’t.”

“Demons are more powerful than we give them credit for.” She chuckled and rubbed her hand down the baby’s back. “I thought I’d never have a child myself. Had never dreamed I’d be a mother. So don’t give up on the notion. If … when you and Calix bond, your body will decide on its own.”

Double-blinking back the tears welling in her eyes, Ava smiled and nodded. “I’m not saying I want a baby right away. But … I’d like to know the option is there. Thank you, Calla.”

Her lips stretched with a smile and she offered a slight nod. “So. I really, really have to pee. Do you mind holding her?”

A ripple of dread climbed Ava’s spine at the thought of holding a baby. She’d always been somewhat nervous around them, but Logan’s child made it terrifying. “What if … I mean, if Magnus comes back.”

“One thing I will say about Magnus is, he wouldn’t let anyone, or anything, hurt his baby. I think he believes Avalon is his.” Calla chuckled and shook her head. “Which is an utterly disgusting thought, yet at the same time, kind of sweet.” She pushed off the couch and gripped the nape of the baby, holding her to her body. “If you’re not comfortable, I can ask Anna.”

“No. It’s okay. I’ll take her.”

What the hell was she thinking? Ava wanted to choke herself for offering to hold a baby. A baby! Before she could protest, though, a warm smile lit Calla’s face, and she knelt forward, setting the infant into the awaiting crook of Ava’s arm.

Taking a deep breath, Ava stared down at the little angel in her arms, whose tiny fingers were curled against her throat. The roundness of her chin and her button nose were definitely Calla, but the stern pinch of her brow reminded Ava of Logan. A much cuter version, but she definitely had her dad’s angry scowl. Perhaps she’d grow to be a little spitfire, but at the moment, she was an absolute doll. Her lips twitched as she slept, as if she smiled, and the idea bloomed a warm and happy feeling in Ava’s heart.

“She likes you,” Calla said softly beside her.

“If … if she cries?”

“I’ll only be a minute, or two. And she looks pretty cozy to me.”

Ava nodded, casting her gaze back down at the child, while Calla walked off. How sweet and right it felt holding her. She slid her pinky into the baby’s curled palm and quietly giggled when Avalon’s tiny fingers squeezed around it.

“You are the most precious thing,” she whispered. “So beautiful.”

The baby didn’t belong to her, and yet she couldn’t help the overwhelming feeling that she wanted to protect her. So tiny and fragile. And trusting. Perhaps what touched Ava most, was that this child lay quiet and vulnerable, and Ava wanted to honor that trust with the silent assurance that she was safe. Ava could only imagine what Logan must’ve felt every time he held her.

And no wonder Magnus growled at her.

A gusting wind fluttered the blanket, and Ava bent forward, tucking her head against the baby’s to block the cool air. Mingling with the baby’s newborn scent came the coppery undertones, an essence that struck the back of Ava’s throat.

Blood.

She lifted her face from the still-sleeping child and shook her head, closing her eyes to break the spell settling over her.

Behind her shuttered lids, the dream from the other night, with the angel, played inside her head. She inwardly cringed at the memory of biting into the innocent creature’s flesh, but the tingle of its blood left her licking her lips.

She opened her eyes to find the three hellhounds had emerged from the forest. Their hunched backs and red eyes held a warning as they prowled toward the patio.

Ava hissed, clutching the baby tighter.

Avalon whimpered in her arms, her lips creating a downward pout, eyes still closed as if she was caught in a nightmare.

The sight of her broke Ava from her enchantment, and she lightly rocked the infant in her arms. “Shhhh, it’s okay. I promise, I won’t hurt you.”

A sickness churned in her stomach, though. Thoughts she couldn’t bear to face, and when she lifted her gaze, she noticed the dogs had halted their advance toward her. Even so, they watched from across the yard.

Waiting.

No, I can’t. I can’t do this.

“How was she?”

Calla’s voice struck her muscles, and Ava jumped, startling the baby a second time.

A soft mewling cry set Ava’s nerves on edge and her arms went stiff. “Just in time,” she said on a breath of relief.

Calla reached down and lifted Avalon from her arms, immediately settling the baby as she kissed her head. “You’re a natural.”

Without a word, Ava pushed up from the couch, needing to find a place she could quietly crawl into herself and die.

What had she almost done? What could she have done?

The question batted her skull as she made her way to the door, ignoring the scalding burn of her skin and whatever Calla said as she called after her.

Need to get away.

Can’t be here.

She gave one more glance toward the hounds still sitting at attention, and retreated back inside the house. Up the staircase, she made her way to Calix’s room and closed the door behind her, shutting out the light.

What had she become?

The floor hit her tailbone as she fell to a slump against the wall, tucking her knees into her body. She sent up a prayer to the gods that she’d stopped herself.

And what exactly had stopped her? Not the dogs, nor the possibility of Calla returning.

It was Avalon herself who’d saved her own life by appealing to the small bit of humanity that Ava so desperately clung to. Seeing the discomfort on her face had broken the trance and cast a cloud of shame over Ava.

For a brief moment, she took some comfort in that thought, quickly tamped down by the question of what would happen the next time? Would she stop?

“I couldn’t have hurt her.”

She wouldn’t.

Still, it didn’t keep her from flashing to the only place she could think to go, where she wouldn’t hurt an innocent. A place she could sate the craving, but one she loathed to return to, packed with low lives and human scum.

Faeria club.

* * *

Ava opened her eyes to the black scribblings scrawled across the bathroom wall. Suck cock stood out as the most legible, and she sighed. Ryke had sometimes sent her to the club, when he’d been too lazy to pick up a female on his own. Whomever she’d nabbed there probably had some questionable background. Mostly drug addicts, prostitutes, deadbeat moms. Not that they’d deserved to die, but Ryke would’ve been picking teenage girls off the cheerleading squad, had she not done his scouting for him.

She pushed to a stand, still wearing the shorts and tank from earlier. Even with her pasty white skin, she’d no doubt be a magnet in a place like Faeria.

Without sparing herself a glance in the mirror, afraid of catching a baby killer staring back at her, she exited the bathroom. At just four in the evening, the bar hadn’t yet picked up, but there were enough patrons to for her seek out her next meal. Glutting on the asshole alcoholics might keep her hunger in check.

Scanning the bar, she set her gaze on a male who sat off toward the back of the area. Balding, with a crown of greasy tufts of hair, he watched the crowd behind from his spectacles, while sipping what might’ve been soda. Something about him screamed creepy, though, and the longer she stared, the more she picked up on the aura of sins that wafted across the room.

“Rapist, or pedophile, for sure,” she muttered, sauntering across the room.

Didn’t take long for the asshole to perk up and shift in his seat, the quicker she closed the space between them.

Before she got close, though, pressure hit her throat, tightening its grip, and Ava halted in her tracks, hands flying to her neck where something dug into her windpipe.

“Well, hello, pretty lady.”

She recognized the voice.

Xander.

The cold steel of Diablis tautened the more she tugged, ensuring a snug fit.

“Hey, let her go.” As the male in the booth shimmied up to a stand, Xander came from behind her, his towering presence suddenly shrinking her. Eyes wide, the male scrambled back into his seat.

Coming around front of her brought Xander’s shit-eating grin within punching distance, and Ava swung out at him, missing the mark as he dodged her.

“I’m not the Fallen angel! I’m Ava!”

“Sure. You were Ava back at the mansion, too. The real Ava wants her face back.”

“I am the real Ava!”

“Well, real Ava, you’re coming with me, regardless, and we’ll sort this out back in my chambers.” Gripping her elbow, he led her back through the bar, down the hallway toward the bathrooms.

“What the hell are you doing here?” She jerked her arm to break his grip, and growled at the futility of trying to fight him.

“Well, for a while there, I was hoping for a goddamn miracle, and poof! You showed up as though I deserved that shit.”

Coming to a halt in front of the emergency exit he’d led her to, she tugged at the chain tethered to her throat. “If you don’t let me go, I’ll fucking scream right here.”

Xander swung around and shrugged his shoulders. “Go ahead. I already let the owner know why I’m here. He knows I’m picking up a crafty female who’s being hunted by the Sentinels, and I warned him to stay the fuck back if he wants to keep both his dick and his bar intact.”

“How the hell did you even know about this place?”

“Lyric.”

Holy shit, Ava hadn’t heard that name in forever. They’d been good friends while she’d dated Ryke—one of the only females Ava had ever bothered to form a relationship with. “What about Lyric?”

“She ran into you the other night. Ring any bells?”

“No. Because I was with Calix the other night.”

Xander’s cheeks puffed up, and he blew out an exasperated breath before turning back around and prodding her forward with a tug. “Right,” he said over his shoulder. “And the real Ava hasn’t left the mansion since she arrived, so what are the odds?”

“Gods, you’re impossible!”

“I’ll give you some credit. You dicked me over pretty good the first time, but that shit doesn’t happen twice.”

Ava yanked on the steel, urging him to stop. “I can’t … go … back there! Please! I don’t belong there!”

“I don’t give a shit.”

“Xander!”

“Thais!” He gave another jerk of the steel and continued on. “I hope you’re down with crosses, sweetheart, because I’ve got a cold steel gem that I can’t wait to strap you to.”

“Calix is going to kick. Your. Ass.” She crossed her arms, leveling her gaze on the bastard angel.

“You’re really into this role. I’m impressed. As for Calix?” He tipped his head, grinning the kind of grin she wanted to scratch right off his face. “No. He. Won’t. That poor bastard is looking forward to a long and happy life with his girl. Who isn’t you, by the way.”

Still pissed off, Ava couldn’t help but chew on her tongue at that. “Oh, yeah? Did he … say that?”

“You see the way he looks at her? Of course you have. You’ve studied that shit, right? Psycho chicks pay attention to that stuff.”

“Xander! For fucks sake, I’m Ava!”