Chapter 17
Tyson stared at where he was still buried inside of Cersi as some unknown emotion unfurled right in the center of his chest. It was warm and tingly and so damn foreign it took him a minute to place it. As soon as he did, shock set in. No! What have I done? What in the fuck have I done?
Too late. The incisors in his mouth punched through his gums and flooded his mouth with blood as Monster raged inside of him. Bite her! Mark her! Keep her!
Pulling out of her, Tyson stumbled backward as his hands clawed and he felt fur rippling up his arms and legs before it just as quickly receded.
“T-Tyson?” On the bed, Cersi rolled over and looked up at him in shock.
“Get…out!” Monster was polluting his voice now causing his voice to not sound like his own. For a moment, he wondered if Cersi even understood his words, but when all the color drained from her face and she shoved up off the bed, he knew that she had.
She ripped her clothes up off the floor and didn’t even bother staying in the room to dress. No, she clutched her clothes and shoes to her chest and rushed out of the room.
Thank fuck!
He didn’t want her there to see him drop to his knees before falling forward onto his hands as he panted and fought to keep Monster from ripping out of him. He wanted her. He wanted to sink his teeth into her, he wanted to bury his dick inside of her.
The front door slammed, and Tyson threw his head back and roared. Every ounce of him strained to keep Monster contained. He couldn’t care right now that Cersi was probably feeling used and discarded. There was no way in hell he could chase her down, not like this. If he went after her, Monster would rip free and then she’d bleed. There’d be no keeping Monster from claiming her as theirs, and even as much as Tyson wanted that to happen, it couldn’t happen the way Monster would make it happen.
Another roar ripped from him before he fell to his side, every muscle straining and cramped as he fought to keep Monster inside. It hurt. It hurt so goddamn bad. It felt like his belly was full of acid and his muscles were on fire. Tears leaked out of the corners of his eyes. All he could do was grunt against the pain. It wasn’t just physical either. At that moment Monster hated him. Hated him! It felt like there was a fissure cracking right down the middle of his soul, but he’d take it. He’d do anything to spare Cersi the agony of what Monster wanted to do. The animal wouldn’t stop at just biting and claiming Cersi. He wanted to turn her. He wanted to make her his in all ways, but it was forbidden, and not just by Haddix. No the Council and the Elders created the law, and the law said that no shifter of any kind could change any human…ever, not even mates. Cersi would never be a wolf, but he knew that if Monster took his skin, the fucker wouldn’t care about the law, wouldn’t care that Cersi wouldn’t want it. No, Monster would change her and deal with the consequences later. So Tyson stayed in his cabin on the floor, dying inside and knowing that somewhere Cersi was feeling discarded…again.
***
Cersi managed to bite back the stinging tears that threatened until she was rushing down Tyson’s front porch stairs. Get out. Get out. The words kept playing on a reel over and over in her head, and every single time she thought them they were followed by a self-deprecating, You fucking idiot!
What had she done? What had she been thinking? That she’d seduce Tyson and then what? This! This is what. Men like him didn’t chase women like her. She knew this and yet here she was, racing through the deep snow, jacket forgotten back at Tyson’s while the breath puffed out of her like a freight train. She was gonna cry, she knew she was going to, so she slowed her steps. She didn’t want to go racing into the house and have someone find her sobbing so turned near a giant tree by the main house and circled around it. Pressing her shoulders into the frozen bark, she slid down and covered her mouth with her fists that were tucked up in the sleeves of her sweater.
Get out.
Tears were tracking down her face as her shoulders shook. She barely even felt the pain of her gunshot wound because compared to the pain in her heart, it was nothing.
Get out.
How she could have been so dumb? You threw yourself at him. You literally begged him to fuck you, and he did, yet here you sit feeling sorry for yourself because he gave what you asked for?
The whole time they’d been intimate, she’d been over the moon. Hell, she’d been on cloud fucking nine feeling sexy and in control and giddy with the power she had over Tyson and his beast. But the instant they were finished, the cloud disappeared and this weighty sensation settled heavily on her chest. This was gravity. She was plunging back to earth with no way to stop herself and no hope of breaking her fall. This was where she shattered.
Fuck it hurt. It hurt so damn bad to be so damn dumb. She wondered if she deserved the pain. Probably. God, she hated the person she was. She hated how she didn’t want certain things in life but kept ending up with them. She was always vowing to be stronger and wiser and every time…every. Damn. Time. She wound up hurt. Why didn’t she learn? Why in the hell didn’t she ever learn?
Curling her knees into her chest, she cried until she ran out of tears and had nothing left inside of her but ache. Cheeks cold, nose frozen, and limbs shaking, she shoved to her feet, straightened her clothing, and bit her trembling lip before heading for the main house.
Tonight, she’d take an extra dose of the pain meds Tyson had given her because she knew it’d be the only way she’d get any sleep. She was going need her sleep because tomorrow she was leaving BlackLodge.
Tyson BloodMoon could go fuck himself!