Scene 6
Jenny & Nicole
The tropic warmth of a paradisiacal getaway was the perfect escape from the frigid winters back home. It also helped that a Hawaiian honeymoon was exactly what the likes of Jenny and Nicole wanted when they married at city hall not too long ago.
Newlyweds. That’s what they were, and that’s how they acted as soon as their tour guide took a break at the edge of a gorgeous clearing in the Hawaiian foliage. He had to phone his girlfriend some details about Christmas dinner the following day.
“Stop!” Nicole said with a giggle, as her wife felt up her shirt and planted a flirtatious kiss on her cheek. “The guy is right over there!”
Jenny could hardly be expected to keep her hands to herself when Nicole frolicked along their tour in nothing but denim shorts and a sheer white crop top. They were both covered in sunscreen and insect repellant, but skin was skin, and Jenny was high on pheromones.
Was it really so bad to want her wife so much? So what if some guy was over there talking about Christmas dinner on his iPhone? Jenny and Nicole had plenty of privacy on the other side of the clearing. A tiny grove of trees made sure of that. Plenty of people screw around over here, I’m sure! It was probably on the tour guide’s agenda. He brought couples on honeymoon here because it was conveniently timed for him to take a break, and the randy couple had a chance to get some sex out of their systems. Hawaii did things to people. God knew it completely fucked up Jenny and Nicole’s ability to be kosher in present company.
“You know what I’m thinking?” Jenny pinned her wife to the nearest tree, one hand meandering up that ridiculous crop top while the other made sure Nicole wasn’t going anywhere. “I’m thinking you and me naked in a waterfall.”
“Sounds like it would be freezing.”
“So our nipples would be hard. What about it?”
Nicole pretended to scoff, but the sound came out in a mixture of giggles and crunching leaves beneath her feet.
“What are you laughing about?”
Nicole was still blushing. “I love your hard nipples.”
“Whaaaat?”
She blushed even harder. “You heard me. They look like two little pink gumdrop candies that I can’t help but want to suck.” Nicole ended that assertion with a small peck to Jenny’s lips.
“Go on.”
“Can I take a peek?”
Jenny glanced around the tree trunk to make sure their tour guide wasn’t looking in their direction. “I’d say knock yourself out, but it would be a pain to drag you back to the resort.”
Nicole bit her bottom lip and lifted her wife’s T-shirt. Jenny had been practical, however. She wore a sports bra beneath her shirt, knowing that she would move around enough in the Hawaiian weather to start sweating. Granted, Nicole had worn one too, but hers was pink and emblazoned with VICTORIA’S SECRET, in case Jenny had forgotten about lingerie and naked women.
“Promise me,” Nicole began, hands clamped on Jenny’s bra, “that you’ll fuck my brains out when we get back to our cabin.”
“Oh my God. You’re too much.” Yet Jenny was already imagining a million ways to get the job done. This was before she asked for some in return, of course.
“Ladies?” Their tour guide politely called out. “Let’s get going! Only ten more minutes until we’re at the falls!”
Reluctantly, Jenny pulled away from her wife’s body and instead merely took her hand. “Sorry!” she called back to the tour guide. “We thought we saw a butterfly!”
“There are a few around here,” the guide mused. “But it’s rare to see them around this part. Too much human traffic.”
“Of course.” Jenny squeezed Nicole’s hand and fell in step behind the guide as they continued up the trail.
The waterfalls near the resort were a perfect excuse to get away from civilization and enjoy the more natural parts of the Hawaiian landscape. Not only had Jenny’s travel agent suggested it for their third day in Hawaii, but everyone, from the front desk at the resort to the locals at the neighborhood café, insisted that it was one of the greatest views around. Jenny had made sure her phone was fully charged before embarking on a tour that was easy enough to traverse if someone had two working legs. Hell, even one leg would work. The trail was smooth and well-worn. Jenny didn’t know if it was private property that someone paid a pretty penny to keep traversable, or if it was a public park, but one thing was for sure: it was perfect.
Not as perfect as Nicole, but damn near it.
“Look at that bird!” Nicole smacked her wife’s arm and nearly scared her out of her skin. “Have you ever seen one so colorful before?”
Jenny had barely caught a glimpse of it. “It’s almost as beautiful as you.”
“Oh, stop!”
But Jenny had already filed those colors into her head. Hopefully, she could use them for future endeavors, like a summer collection at her personal boutique. If spring was set for blue and green, then what was wrong with injecting some red pieces for the summer Hawaiian sun?
Even if it was winter… but winter in Hawaii had its own special meaning.
They reached the summit where the falls hid within seven minutes. Their guide turned to catch the look on their faces as they emerged from the darkest part of the trail and were instantly blinded by the bright sunlight reflecting off crystal clear waters… and deafened by the thunderous roar of two waterfalls cascading off ancient cliffs.
“Wow!” Nicole lifted her sunglasses to get a better look. “Have you ever seen something like that before, Jen?”
Jenny looked her wife up and down. She also caught the tour guide doing the same thing. He glanced away as if he hadn’t done a thing. That’s my gay wife, buddy. I mean, you’re welcome to try, but you’re not her type. Jenny was. That’s why Nicole married her.
“I sure haven’t,” Jenny finally said. “It’s almost as gorgeous as you.”
“If you don’t stop saying crap like that, Jen, I’m gonna think you’re really full of shit.”
Jenny grinned. “Why don’t you pose by the bench there so I can get a picture for your Instagram?”
“Are you kidding? Let’s get the guide to take our picture right here! You better kiss me!”
The guide was always professional, but Jenny could tell the man was both elated to be in the presence of two young and hot lesbians, yet also in a constant state of regret that he couldn’t do anything about it. Whatever fantasies you’re harboring, pal, keep them to yourself. Jenny’s job was to keep one arm around her wife and the other holding the guide at length. He had gotten them to the falls, but Jenny was pretty sure she could get them back to the resort.
Stop being so paranoid. Jenny couldn’t help it. She was a woman of the streets now courting the high life with a hot wife. In Hawaii. Some habits would never die.
Kinda like the habit she had of sticking her tongue down Nicole’s throat whenever they kissed. Eat your heart out, Mr. Guide. He announced that multiple pictures had been taken. Jenny kept kissing.
“Jeeennn.” Nicole shoved her wife away with a giggle. “Keep that up and we’ll have to take a dip in the falls.”
“As long as you keep this white shirt on.”
“Jen!”
The guide told them they would hang out for about fifteen minutes. Plenty of time for him to make more phone calls and for the newlyweds to canoodle by the fence that prevented them from falling into the water.
“I love you,” Jenny whispered into her young wife’s ear. “Let’s come back here every Christmas.”
“Now, Jen…” Nicole patted her wife’s chest. “That wouldn’t make much sense. In a few years we might have more reasons to stay home and be cozy around the Christmas tree.”
“Like what? Your mom not wanting to come with us?” Linda was back at the resort, sipping cocktails on the beach and enjoying her cancer’s remission. She had been invited on this tour, but had declined on the grounds she wished to conserve her energy and that, “You two really should do some things on your own. It’s your informal honeymoon.” The formal honeymoon was planned for the following summer. They debated between Thailand and Ireland. Thailand was currently winning.
Nicole lightly patted her wife’s butt. “Work things… personal things…”
“If you’re gearing up to tell me that you’re pregnant, it’s not working. ‘Cause if you’re pregnant, we’ve got bigger things to discuss.”
“Oh my God, Jen, how can I be pregnant if I haven’t come close to that stuff in over a year?” Nicole grunted in disgust. “Nooo, but we might have kids one day, right?”
“We had talked about it.” They were in no way ready to start adoption processes, however. Jenny wanted to enjoy her newlywed wife while getting her business off the ground and shopping around for a house. Besides, Nicole was still in college! Motherhood could wait! “But I doubt our kids would be angry about going to Hawaii every Christmas. Like, c’mon.”
“Hon, trust me, I did the whole family vs. destination holiday thing growing up, and believe it or not, meeting up with my mother’s huge as shit family every Christmas was less stressful than trying to coordinate Christmas in Rio. The trick is to not host it.”
“I do trust you.” Jenny could not keep her hands off her wife – again. When would this tour be over and they could get back to the best part of the honeymoon? Damn good thing Linda was at the beach. She was staying in the cabin next door, but that may have been still too close for what Jenny had in mind! “But I waaaaant us in Hawaii every winter so we can ensure we get sweaty when we do it.”
“Pretty sure it could be thirty below outside and we would still sweat in bed, Jen. Just turn up the heater.”
Jenny was ready to nip her wife’s ear when she realized that the thunderous roar of the waterfalls wasn’t just the water.
It was also the helicopter flying in from the north.
“What the…” The tour guide looked up from his phone with nothing but shock on his tanned face. “What’s that doing all the way out here?”
Jenny released her wife and looked up. Sure enough, the black helicopter slowly lowered itself into the clearing, the whipping blades sending everyone to early-onset deafness and the surrounding foliage to hurricane-like death.
“Jen?” Nicole’s voice was lost to the intensity around them. “What’s going on?”
A rope lowered from the side of the helicopter. A man dressed in all black shimmied down the rope as if he did stunts like this every damn day.
“What the fuck!” The tour guide ran into the bending foliage, phone clasped to his ear.
There’s no way this guy is here for us. Jenny’s brain went to the impossibly preposterous. She had a few enemies, after all. Maybe someone had caught wind that she had suddenly married and wanted to take care of a few matters. Or maybe they were here to kidnap Nicole! Thoughts like that made her grab Nicole and head for the foliage as well.
“Wait!” A man’s voice boomed in the clearing, amplified by a radio from within the cabin. “This will only a take a moment!”
A moment? A moment? What the fuck!
The man hopped onto the walkway and immediately pulled an envelope from his front pocket. Jenny, keeping herself between him and Nicole, had the fire in her belly that once kept her alive when she was homeless on the streets.
The envelope hovered in front of her face. The man, who nursed his other arm as if it had been bitten by a rabid dog, urged her to take it.
She did under the condition that he leave. Immediately.
True to his word, the man shimmied back up the rope and was lifted out of the clearing as soon as Jennifer Bishop accepted the message.
Five minutes later, the helicopter had flown away and left the park in peace. Trees that weren’t permanently bent returned to their original positions. Birds squawked in irritation. The waterfalls continued to pound the ponds and lakes below. After the noise conjured by the helicopter, the waterfalls were barely any noise at all.
“The shit fuck was that crap?” The tour guide stumbled back to the fence line, both hands flailing in the air. “Did you know that guy?”
“I have no idea who that was.” Jenny had almost forgotten that there was an envelope in her hand. “Apparently they went through all of that trouble to hand this to me. Whatever it is.”
“You better open it,” Nicole said. “Before they come back and make us do it at gunpoint.”
Jenny broke the unfamiliar seal on the flap and pulled out one single piece of paper. There was not much information on it.
“Dear Ms. Bishop,
We have never met before, and I wish to change that. I have a good feeling that you and I would get along swimmingly. Please consider attending my small New Year’s party this December 31st. The details of the location and timing are listed below. Your invitation includes yourself and your lovely new wife, whom I also desire to meet.
PS: Congratulations on your nuptials. May you have many happy years together.”
“Who the hell is this from?” Jenny couldn’t find a return address – or even a name – anywhere. She also didn’t recognize the handwriting. “Do you know anything about this?” She handed the invitation to her wife.
“No. But this is the most excitement I’ve had since we got married.”
“That was literally just a few days go.”
“What can I say? I need a barrage of constant excitement, otherwise I get bored.”
Jenny narrowed her eyes. “Why am I not surprised that you are not perturbed by what just happened?”
“Honestly, that guy could’ve glided in and been done with it, but he didn’t, so now we’re stuck with this shit. Let’s reconvene after we get back to the resort.”
“That sounds like an awesome idea.” The guide readjusted his bag and motioned for the women to follow him back down the trail.
“You first,” Jenny said to her wife. “God only knows who will come chasing us down once we get going.”
Nicole rolled her eyes before taking off after the tour guide. Jenny was later happy to report that nothing of any interest happened on the return trip to the resort. No helicopters, no mysterious messengers, and no kisses to any part of her wife’s body. She figured it best to completely detach herself from any kind of emotion until she was sure they were completely safe again.
***
They found Linda at one of the open-air bars close to the beach. She sat in a white wrap-dress and a straw hat on her head. The orange-colored drink she nursed had more than one man coming up and daring to suggest that she had no business being by herself on a beautiful Hawaiian beach. “I’m waiting for my family,” she was overheard saying as her daughter and new daughter-in-law approached. “Please excuse me if I do not feel up to socializing with strangers.”
Nicole hopped on the stool next to her mother. Jenny stood between them, her nerves still frayed as she slapped the invitation on the bar. Nicole had the honors of describing what had happened by the waterfalls – Linda didn’t even have the chance to ask how everything went or to ask to see any pictures.
“What do you make of this?” Nicole asked, as if her mother was the oracle and gatekeeper of all things pertaining to how the wealthy worked. According to Jenny, she was. She definitely knows more than I do, and I’m the one with the money now.
Linda carefully looked over the invitation, like a museum curator would study a potential piece for display. “This is very nice stationery,” she asserted. “The pen used has a graceful heft to it. The kind that requires an expensive tool as well as a steady, professional hand. I’m guessing whoever wrote this had extensive penmanship training when they were younger.” Linda glared at her daughter. “Something we never did for you. I’ve seen your handwritten notes.”
“Don’t suppose you know who it’s from.”
“Of course I don’t. I’m not well versed in the handwriting of the rich and famous. I merely appreciate a good piece of handwriting when it crosses my eye.” Linda went back to sipping her fruity drink.
“You can’t tell anything other than it came from a rich person?” Nicole scoffed at her own mother. “We could’ve figured that out when someone commandeered a private helicopter to deliver it to us in the middle of nowhere!”
“I’m not sure what you want from me, honey.” I’m not the all-knowing woman you apparently think I am.”
“Just… more information than that.”
Jenny intervened before a spat could erupt on her honeymoon. “I really am quite concerned about this. Do you make anything at all out of it?”
“Hmm.” Linda glanced at the invitation again. Her eyes lingered on the address written at the bottom. “I’ve heard of this location before. I believe it’s near Napa.”
“Do you know who owns it?”
“Likely rich enough to keep that sort of information private. I’ve never been there, so I couldn’t tell you, honey.”
Jenny already had her phone out, looking up the address. “It’s unlisted, of course. Look at that. Totally blacked out on Google Maps.”
“Oh my God, they must be loaded to pull that off.”
Linda sniffed the stationery. “Thought that smelled familiar. Your father used to wear a similar cologne.”
“Cologne? You mean it’s from a man?” Jenny grunted in disbelief. “Fuck that. I’m not going to a party with a man involved.”
Nicole was on her own phone looking something up. Or maybe she was texting somebody. It must have been the latter, for she eventually put her phone down and said, “I just texted my old friend Veronica about it. She said she’s got a friend who has been to this place before and says it was owned by…” Nicole turned her phone upside down. Clearly, that helped her read her texts better. “Huh. She said there was a really tough NDA signed about it. She can’t say.”
“That’s so helpful,” Jenny muttered.
“Sorry! I’m doing what I can here!” Nicole fired off another text. “Now she’s saying that this friend is a pro escort, so that explains a few things.”
“So it’s either a guy or a ragin’ lesbian.”
Nicole put her phone down. “I know which one I want it to be.”
“The ragin’ lesbian?”
“Hell yes. If it is, we should definitely go.” Her exaggerated wink almost eased Jenny’s nerves. Almost.
“I’m going to find out a few things first.” Jenny turned to the bartender standing on the other side of the open bar. “Like what I can get here with a shitton of vodka in it.”
Nicole leaned her elbow against her wife’s shoulder. “Merry Christmas, babe.”
Now that sweet sentiment managed to ease Jenny’s nerves, long before the fruity Sex on the Beach did.