LOLA

 

The first thing I did when I awoke was check my phone to see if Zach had contacted me. He hadn’t and though I began to suspect that he wanted nothing to do with me—not like I blame him—I realized that I didn’t have time to worry about that. With or without him, the plans were already set into motion.

When I stepped out into the living room, my father was fast asleep on the couch with an empty bottle of whiskey lying sideways on the coffee table. After I went to sleep, he finished off the bottle in typical Grimm fashion. I realized that this was my opportunity to slip out of the house undetected.

I needed out of that place, if even just momentarily so that I could breathe fresh air and collect my thoughts. And the place I went to do my thinking was out into the Angeles National Forest, where my father and I buried my sister after recovering her body from the morgue.

Deep in the heart of the forest and well off the beaten path, this was the only place we could find to bury her. And though it’s not a ceremony proper and there is no headstone, it’s quite peaceful as a resting space. In fact, it’s more peaceful, I’d reckon, than an actual cemetery. My only wish is that we could mark her grave with a stone, or at least something identifying that this is where she’s buried.

But the only marking remains strictly in my imagination.

I was never fond of her in life. Okay, so maybe that’s not entirely true. There was a time, back when we were both young, naïve, and innocent where I was more fond of her than anyone in this world. We were best friends back then, even while all the kids at school teased us for having the same name.

And then she became someone else I didn’t recognize. She seemed to develop all of my father’s worse traits and seemed content to live her life in the dark shadow of evil that has shrouded my father since God knows when.

But there’s so much I want to say to her.

I want to thank her for being there for me when nobody else was. And I want to tell her how much she let me down. I want to know why she chose the life she chose, and why she was content to go away for long stretches of time. I want to ask her why she disappeared from public life and why she left me alone to stand as the sole heir to my father’s legacy.

There are so many things I don’t understand and I probably never will. There’s so many questions I want to ask, but I can’t ask my father too many of them in his remaining time on this Earth, lest he get too suspicious.

I kneel down onto the ground right above where she’s buried and wipe away twigs and dirt until I can see the small stone I left for her. On the top of it, etched into the stone are the words, Lola, Lolita. A different woman from one person to the next. Fly high. Fly high. Fly high.

This is the only marking that will ever be at her grave and it’s not enough, but it has to be enough. It’s almost fitting that her death remains just as much a secret as she remained while she was living. It wasn’t until after I faked mine and my father’s deaths that she emerged from the shadows. It was apparently a tough sell telling our associates that she was Seth’s daughter, and I think that’s why she tried so hard to avenge our father’s death by kidnapping and attempting to kill Zane and his girlfriend.

We all know how that ended; with her being shot and falling to her death.

And I’m not mad at Zane, or Zach for that matter, because I’m able to take a step back and realize that she chose that path for herself. It still doesn’t take away from the open wounds of my heart. It still doesn’t take away the painful memories and all the second-guessing about how maybe her life could have turned out differently.

It gives me the motivation I need to make sure I make the changes in my own life that I want and need to see.

I brush the remainder of the dirt from the stone and let out a sigh just as a shadow passes over my back. I’m used to people sneaking up behind me. For as long as I can remember, my life has been endangered by the mere virtue of being my father’s daughter.

I slowly rise to my feet but feel a sense of calm passing over me, as if I know the person behind me doesn’t wish to harm me. The only person I can think of that could know I’m out here is my father. I twist on my feet to find Zach, of all people, standing behind me.

“How did you find me?” I question lowly and brace one hand against my hip and cock my head sideways. He’s dressed in blue jeans and a black tee, and his hands are shoved into his pockets.

“You look a lot different when you’re not wearing heels,” he says, his eyes dropping to glance at my feet clad in black sneakers. “You look a lot shorter too, and I had Marcus track your phone. That’s how I found you.”

I force a cheeky grin. “You guys always knew how to outsmart me.”

“Yeah, those smarts didn’t exactly work when your father held a gun to our heads.” He retrieves one hand from his pockets and drapes it over the back of his neck. “That’s actually why I’m here.”

“You’ve thought about what I asked you?”

“I thought about it a lot.” He sighs, his muscular chest heaving slightly. “In fact, I haven’t stopped thinking about it. Even when I managed to fall asleep for a brief two hours, you and your father still haunted my dreams.”

I comb a hand through my hair, nervously waiting for his response. “And?”

“I’ll help you,” he says, bringing about a sense of relief upon my heavy shoulders. He sees the relief in my eyes and raises a hand into the air. “But I’m only going to help you so I can put an end to this once and for all.”

“And you trust me now?” I shrug. “What’s changed in less than twenty-four hours?”

He glances to his left for a brief moment and wets his lips with his tongue. “I’ve realized that this is like a shadow hanging over me and I’d rather risk you going back on your deal than I am willing to risk never escaping out from underneath this shadow.”

“It’s bothered you that much?” I take a careful step forward and place one hand against his chest to feel his heart. It beats erratically underneath his chest.

“More than you could ever know.” He drops his gaze to meet mine. And I’m reminded just how beautiful it is and how those emerald eyes sealed my fate once before. For being such a strong man, his eyes almost betray him. They’re a perfect shade of dark, emerald green, but there’s an innocence in those orbs, in those windows to his soul. “More than I’m capable of admitting out loud.”

“You just kind of did.” I straighten myself out and move to pass him, all the while running a finger along his chest until I’m standing behind him.

He latches onto my arm and spins around in place so that he’s right behind me, his hot breath scorching against the back of my neck. He steps closer still and drops a hand to my waist to hold me firmly in place.

When I breathe, my body pushes back against his. It’s a familiar place for me, but one that still feels wrong somehow. It’s always felt wrong. Back when we first met, there was an undeniable spark between the two of us. I think that’s why he was so willing to follow me into the darkness.

I swallow a nervous gulp and force myself away from him. Once I’m free, I spin back around to face him and throw my hands outwards. “What are you doing?”

“You’re the one who came to me, remember?”

“Obviously.” I step towards him and hook a glance up at him. He stands a good six inches taller than me when I’m not wearing heels. “But we can’t do this again. We can’t do us again. It’s too dangerous.”

“Yeah, I know.” He drops a hand to caress me softly on the cheek. I give into his touch, nodding my head into his embrace. “This is strictly business.”

He pulls back and clears his throat. “So tell me, Lola Grimm. What’s the plan?”