Chapter Twenty-Six
Devon didn’t respond to my messages that night. Or that morning. I decided not to text him again. He didn’t show for classes, either. There was so much shit going on, I was probably the last person on his mind. Besides, I needed to research for another internship over the summer. JenCar wasn’t the only place in Madison looking for engineers. I worked on the projects, sat with my advisor, and added a Monday night shift at Steak Stockade to pay off my credit cards. They hadn’t gotten terribly high, but the clothes I bought for my internship hadn’t been cheap despite going to a resell shop. Plus I’d eaten out far more than normal. And I preferred to keep my balance at zero.
The names leaked out about who on the baseball team gambled. Chuck Mathis, star second baseman, Barry Acklin first base, Tyler Robins shortstop, Jonathan McElroy catcher, and a couple of the starting pitchers, including Devon. The team had already lost their centerfielder and right fielder to the PED scandal. It looked like they’d lose the entire starting lineup. Only the freshmen were untouched. They hadn’t been at school long enough to be corrupted, according to the latest article.
I finished my shift on Monday. My feet needed a soak and my hair needed degreaser. Kit walked out with me.
“Check it out, Liv,” Kit said, stopping at a two-toned Chevy Camaro. Most of the body was cobalt blue, except for the gray-primed doors. “She’s all mine. Whaddya think?”
I walked around the car. For the most part, it was in great shape. There were rust spots near the wheel wells, but nowhere else that I could see. “’76 or ’77?”
“She’s a ’76,” Kit said, beaming like a new father. “This baby is a classic.”
I ran my hand over the tailfin. “She’s beautiful, Kit. Just take care of the rust and paint the doors. The ladies will be eating out of your hands.”
“That’s what I’m hoping for.” The smile fell from his face. “Liv, there’s somebody creeping by your truck.”
I turned around. Across the dark parking lot, an even darker figure leaned against the driver’s door. It was like a shadow on my truck. My heart sped in my chest. Kit wouldn’t leave me alone. Despite knowing that, fear snaked its way through each vein, freezing me into place. His head moved, and it was as if I could feel him looking right at me. Right through me. The shadow pushed off my truck with his foot and stepped into a nearby light.
Devon.
The growing panic collapsed like a building in an earthquake. Kit stepped in front of me, blocking my view of Devon completely, or Devon’s view of me. I wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing. It was sweet either way. I put my hand on his shoulder.
“It’s okay. I know him.”
“So? Who leans against a girl’s truck like that in the middle of the night?” Kit asked over his shoulder.
It was a valid point.
“Olivia?” Devon moved closer. “We need to talk.”
“Really, Kit. It’s totally okay.” I moved around the grill cook and smiled at him. “And the car’s gorgeous. Just get that oil leak fixed soon.”
Kit’s face went from bad-ass to oh-shit in less than two seconds. He dropped to his chest and peered under his car. “What the hell? How did you even see that, Liv?”
I almost laughed but kept myself in check. There was no way I’d seen it. It was just a way to get Kit to back off. Besides, based on the age of the car and the current condition, there was bound to be a leak somewhere.
“Hey,” I said, meeting Devon halfway. I reached out to touch him arm, but he stepped back so I only felt air. “You okay? I heard about the—”
“What the hell did you say to Hailey?” he asked. There was a razor-sharp edge to his voice.
“I… Nothing. Why?” It was cold outside, but the air surrounding Devon was freezing.
“Don’t lie to me. She told me that you and Paige talked. She wouldn’t tell me what you said, but she admitted to having a little chat with you. She said you told her everything.” He shoved his hands into the pocket of his Westland hoodie. “What did you tell her?”
“Nothing, I swear. I’ve never seen you gamble on anything other than stupid stuff. What could I have told her?”
“That you’ve seen me gambling on stupid stuff.” He shook his head and glanced away. When he turned back toward me, his eyes narrowed into slits. “Was this some kind of sick revenge? Did you really want me to fall for you so you could cut me off at the knees?”
Fall for you? Did he just say…? My breath caught in my throat.
“I thought…I thought you were different. I thought all that shit from our freshman year was in the past. I thought all our stupid competition bullshit was in the past.” He took two steps and bent his face to mine. “I thought you might actually care about me, too. Fuck me for loving you, Olivia Dawson. Fuck me for thinking this was more than just a game to you.”
He turned around and stormed away. I watched him climb into his SUV and drive away. Warm arms wrapped around my shoulders. I let Kit hug me from behind until I could finally breathe again.
It didn’t matter what the truth was to Devon. All that mattered was that I betrayed him.
Even if I did love him. Fuck me for not telling him that.
Kit had tried and failed to cheer me up. His lame jokes fell on deaf ears. I drove home in a daze, texting Paige from a stoplight along the way. I wanted to keep on going back to Kerns with my tail between my legs for a different reason. How did everything become such a colossal mess within such a short period of time? I’d managed to get my dream internship and lose it. I managed to put my prejudices aside and fall for a jock only to lose him. If only I could rewind the clock. If only I knew how in the hell to fix all of this.
My building was alive with light despite the hour. It was almost two in the morning. The rest of the apartments were rented to grad students who tended to study more and party less. That didn’t stop them from staying up until three or four, though. Or they fell asleep with their lights on. I’ve done that on more occasions than I could count on my hands and feet.
I walked up the steps on weary legs. The shift then Devon’s bombshell exhausted me. Paige opened my door and pulled me inside.
“What happened?” She pushed me onto the daybed and handed me a hot cup of herbal tea. “Your text wasn’t exactly coherent.”
“Devon. That’s what happened,” I said as I sat the mug on the coffee table. “He showed up at Stockade and waited until I got off work.”
“And?”
I stood and shrugged my coat off, tossing it onto the wingback. Then I stripped out of my uniform and put on red-and-black flannel PJs.
“Wow, whatever he said really fucked with your head,” Paige said. I settled beside her, pulled my quilt over both of us, and put my head on her shoulder. “Tell me what he said.”
“He said…” I blinked back the tears. “He said I talked to that bitch to get revenge on him. He said I’d cut him off at the knees.” I paused, not wanting to tell her the most painful part, but I had to. I needed her to help me figure out how to fix this. “He said he’d fallen for me.”
“Oh shit.” Paige reached for my tea and put it in my hands.
I drained it, burning my tongue in the process. “What am I going to do?”
“I’m not sure there’s anything you can do.” Paige squeezed me against her. “The only person who can fix this is the person who broke it to begin with.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.”
“I don’t think I can do that.”
“I don’t want to lose him, Paige. I…” I pulled away from her and smiled sadly. “I think I love him, too.”
“Maybe just wait. The truth is bound to come out, Liv. Somebody will figure it out.”
I settled back against my pillows. Somehow, I didn’t think anyone else could fix this.