Chapter 24
They drove back to the compound, listening to soft country music and holding hands, not talking much. Lissa seemed tired, and Tank was lost in thought.
He’d been happy tonight. He’d almost forgotten what that felt like.
He pulled into the clearing and parked, but he didn’t move to get out of the truck. He didn’t want this day to end, but he wasn’t sure how to prolong it. At least, not the way he wanted.
Lissa smiled at him, her eyes shining in the dark. “I had a wonderful time today. Thank you for taking me shopping. And on a date.”
She was wearing the new pink jacket, and she looked fucking adorable in it. He wondered when the last time was she’d been allowed to have something frivolous and girly.
He wanted to fill her life with frivolous, girly things.
But he couldn’t do that. She deserved a real mate, not a broken bear still bonded to someone else.
“I wish I could give you more,” he said impulsively. “You deserve this all the time. You deserve a real mate. Not someone like me.”
She was quiet for a moment, still holding his hand. Hers was warm and soft and felt so good in his.
“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you,” she said.
He huffed out a mirthless laugh. “You don’t know yet what a mating bond is like,” he said. “Losing that tore up my bear so bad, and I don’t know if we could ever mate again.”
Lissa caressed his fingers softly. “I know you had that special bond with Angie,” she said. “But not every relationship has to be forever. I always knew, with my boyfriends, that one of us would move on sooner or later.” She stroked his arm slowly. “But it’s nice to have someone to be with. Someone to care about, to hold at night and make you feel like you’re not alone. Couldn’t we be that?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “Maybe we could try.”
He leaned in slowly and kissed her. Like the first time their lips had touched, it was magic, warming his heart, filling him with sweetness and desire at the same time.
Her mouth opened to his, and he wrapped his hand around the back of her neck and deepened the kiss. Why had he been depriving them both of this for so long? It felt right; it felt like what they should be doing.
Maybe Lissa was right. Just because they couldn’t have a true bond, that didn’t mean it couldn’t be good.
He broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers. “Can I tell you a secret?” he murmured.
“Yes.”
“All evening I’ve been thinking about that blue lace underwear. And imagining what it looks like on you. And every time I do, it gives me a boner.”
She giggled, and nipped his lower lip the way she’d done the very first time she kissed him, in the diner. With the same results. Instant desire.
“Want to see it?” she asked.
“Hell yeah,” he said. “I really, really do.”
“Then you better ask me inside, Big Bear.”
“Okay,” he said. “Would you like to come inside?”
“Why yes,” she said primly, and then promptly nibbled on his bottom lip again.
Damn.
He opened his truck door. “This is still a date, so stay there.”
He walked around to her side of the truck to get her door for her. The shopping would be safe in the cargo compartment of his truck, for the moment.
“Be careful with your heels,” he said, wrapping his arm around her waist. “The ground is pretty uneven here.”
Xander’s voice came out of the tree above them. “What is this? Prom night? I thought you’d never stop making out in the truck. Should I take a picture for Grandma?”
“Fuck off, Xander,” Lissa said. “We’re on a date.”
“Sheeyit,” Xander muttered. “A date? It’s like a teenage romance novel all up in here.”
“Not even,” Lissa said. “Give us five minutes, and we’re going to be rocking the ‘R’ rating.”
“I did not need to know that!” Xander called after them.
Tank gave him the finger as they walked away.
They made it safely to the steps and onto the porch, despite Lissa’s heels. There were lights on, and they could see Flynn on the couch, bare feet propped up on the coffee table, and Jasmin curled up in the leather armchair, watching something on TV.
Tank knocked on the window and called, “We’re back!” Flynn lifted a hand in acknowledgement.
Tank led Lissa along the wrap-around porch to the back entrance and they went down the short hall to his room. It was neater than usual—now that Lissa was in and out, there seemed to be a reason to keep it nice for visitors. Before, he hadn’t cared.
He flicked on the lights, using the dimmer to bring them down. Then he faced Lissa and slid the zipper down on her jacket, helping her off with it and slinging it over the chair. They faced each other, both feeling suddenly shy.
She looked so beautiful with the dress floating around her, clinging to some of her curves and disguising others. Her legs looked long and slim in the stockings they’d bought, and the high-heeled shoes made them look sexy as fuck.
He could feel his dick hardening, but he had to be sure this was the right thing. “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked.
She looked up at him, her eyes darkening. “Are you having second thoughts?”
He shook his head. “I’m just afraid of hurting you.”
She frowned. “You mean your bear?”
He shook his head. “It’s just—you deserve someone who has a whole heart to give you, and who could pledge that heart to you forever and devote himself to making you happy. I just don’t want to disappoint you.”
She turned and faced him, her face soft. “Oh, Tank,” she said.
She reached up and traced a heart on his chest. “You have a huge heart. A good heart. Any woman would be lucky to be with you, even if you can’t be a mate to her like you were with Angie.”
He couldn’t resist her any more. He wanted her so badly—wanted to wrap himself around her and make everything that had ever hurt her stop hurting. He wanted to peel her dress off and see how sexy she looked underneath, and then he wanted to worship every inch of skin until she was gasping and screaming his name.
He wanted her to be his. He knew it was selfish, because he couldn’t give his whole self to her. Because he was broken, and one day his bear would break out and do something terrible, and he’d have to be put down.
But he wanted Lissa’s sweetness and caring and happiness. It made his broken places hurt less.
Tank cupped her face and kissed her so, so softly, brushing his lips against hers. She gave a low, sexy moan, and he deepened the kiss just a little, sipping at her lips as if savoring fine whiskey.
He pulled back and smiled at her, and she smiled back. Then he turned her around and pulled her back until he was sitting on the side of the bed with her between his knees, facing away from him.
Slowly, slowly, he pulled down the zipper on her dress, exposing her creamy skin. He dropped a kiss on the back of one shoulder, and then the other, trailing soft kisses down her back as he followed the zipper’s trail.
When it was all the way down, he rose to his feet and lifted the dress over her head. He laid it carefully out on the chair, so it wouldn’t get messed up. Then he turned around and looked at Lissa.
His breath caught in his chest. She still had on her high heels, and thigh-high cream-colored stockings with lace at the top. Then came the lacy blue thong underpants, barely covering her pussy, and leaving her creamy rounded bottom exposed.
There was a matching bra, also covered in lace, offering tantalizing peeks at her pink nipples.
Tank thought his dick was going to burst out of his fancy new pants.
Lissa’s eyes dropped to his crotch, and she smiled mischievously. “So, I guess you like it.” she asked.
Her voice was husky and sexy. All Tank could do was nod.
She walked over to him and put one hand on his waist. The other she trailed up the front of his pants, from the base of his cock to the tip. Tank sucked in a breath and stifled a moan.
The scent of her filled the room—fruity shampoo and body lotion mixed with her own distinctive scent, and the scent of intense arousal.
She wanted him. Broken, confused, unsure of what he had to offer—she wanted him.
“You are absolutely beautiful,” he said honestly. “And hot damn, you are sexy as fuck.”