Jessica
“You did what?!?!” I screech the words at Tyrone, but he doesn’t care. He simply stares at me, blinking quietly, watching as I lose my damn mind. “You contacted him? You know that’s not what Michelle would have wanted!”
“Jessica, he has a right to know he’s a father.”
“He doesn’t have a right to anything,” I hiss, staring at the ceiling. I don’t know what I’m going to do now. What if he shows up and demands custody of Brooke? What if he doesn’t? What if he comes and decides he wants to take her somewhere else? What am I going to do then?
The truth is that Tyrone is right.
Matthew has a right to know he’s a father to a beautiful, charming little girl. He has a right to know that years ago, Michelle gave birth to a child all on her own. He’s the father. He’s been out of the loop for six damn years and now he’s going to find out about her, about Michelle’s secret.
I’m not ready for this.
I’m not ready for any of it.
“Michelle may not have wanted to contact the father of her child, but she’s gone now.” Despite the painful truth behind his words, Tyrone is gentle as he explains the legal process to me. He’s a good lawyer, and there’s a reason Michelle trusted him with all of her secrets. I just wish she could have done something more to grant me sole custody of Brooke. I’ve known the little girl her entire life. I’m practically a second mom. I hate knowing that her father might take her away. It terrifies me.
“He’ll have a chance to respond,” Tyrone says. “He may choose to come to Dragon Isle and meet with us or he may call me. We’ll wait and see. He has thirty days, and then Dragon Law dictates that a legal guardian may be chosen if the child’s living biological parent cannot be reached.”
“And what if he wants her?” I ask, broaching the question I fear the most.
“Jessica, I know you and Michelle were close.”
“We were.”
“Like sisters.”
“Yes.”
“But Matthew is Brooke’s biological father. Like it or not, blood has a huge standing in Dragon Law. If he wants to take Brooke with him to another place, he has that right.”
“And me?” I ask quietly. “What about me?”
Tyrone reaches across the desk and pats my hand gently. “You might not believe this, Jessica, but everything is going to work out, one way or another. You’ll see.”
I don’t want to tear up in the legal office. Nope. Don’t wanna do that at all. I don’t want to cry. I don’t want to break down. Still, I feel the tears beginning to form and I close my eyes shut tight.
“I’ve been a lawyer for a long time,” Tyrone continues. “And I’m going to do my best to ensure Brooke gets the best possible outcome from all of this, okay? Believe it or not, Jessica, she’s the most important part about this entire situation. It’s not just about what’s permissible or what tradition dictates. It’s about what’s going to be healthiest for that little girl.”
“All right,” I say, but I still don’t hold much hope. Michelle had her reasons for not wanting Matthew to know about Brooke. I don’t know what all of them are because she never really talked about it that much. Sometimes when she was drinking too much, she’d let loose a little bit about Brooke’s real dad, but most of the time? Most of the time, she just said it was better that he not know.
I always believed her.
Now, as I make my way out of the attorney’s office, I’m left wondering where I go from here. What am I going to do next? Brooke is an incredible kid. She’s smart and funny and sassy, and she’s doing a great job dealing with her mother’s passing. Hell, she’s doing way better than I would be in the same situation, especially given her age.
But I’m selfish, and I don’t want to lose her.
Not to Matthew.
Not to anyone.
I still have a little bit of time before I have to pick Brooke up from school, so after I leave Tyrone’s office, I head to the grocery store to pick up a few items. I’m distracted the entire time as I think about what’s going to happen next. Maybe I’m just stressing out over nothing. Maybe it’s everything. I don’t know.
“Long day?” The girl at the register smiles as she rings up my items.
“You know me,” I shrug. “How’s your day going, Lea?”
“Not too bad,” she tells me with a bright smile. “I’m going home soon, though, so I might be feeling a little upbeat.”
“Well, I hope the rest of your day is great,” I tell her, taking my items. Lea waves goodbye and I head out of the store and down the street to Michelle’s house.
Our house.
My house.
It’s mine now.
That much is certain.
While I might not get instant custody of the sweetest kid in the world, I do get to live in the house I shared with Michelle. When I first moved in so many years ago, I was nervous about living with another woman. I’d never had a roommate before. I’d never even really been on my own before. Michelle put me totally at ease, though. I moved into the room next to Brooke’s and started my full-time gig as her nanny. It was everything I’d hoped it would be.
And now it might be coming to a close.
I don’t even want to think about what I’m going to do next. Will I go be a nanny to another family? Even though it’s my chosen career, somehow that feels like betrayal. It feels like I’d be letting down the very family who gave me hope, who gave me the life I have now.
I kick a rock that’s sitting on the side of the road.
It bounces away and I start to tear up.
Fuck.
I didn’t expect to say goodbye to Michelle this soon. I thought we still had time. Yeah, her diagnosis was critical, but we should have had more time to come up with a plan, to figure out how everything was going to work. It’s not fair that I’m all alone with Brooke. The universe is a terrible place if it’s going to take my very best friend away from me and leave me all on my own.
“Are you okay?” A deep voice says, and I look up sharply. The tears are streaming freely down my face, but I can clearly see the dark-haired man coming down my sidewalk toward me. I peer behind him to see a small duffel bag sitting on my front porch, and I realize there’s only one person this could be.
And he’s caught me crying.
“Fuck off, Matthew,” I say, and I push by him to the front door. He doesn’t say anything, but I can feel the shock and surprise radiating off of him as I open the front door, step inside, and slam the door closed.
Fuck this day.
Then I start to sob.