CHAPTER 26
It was still raining heavily, but the worst of the storm had passed as Travis turned onto the drive. He lifted his chin, talking into the rearview. “Once the storm has passed and you’re settled, I’ll take you out to the barn. I have something to show you.”
Elaine’s mind reeled. The whole way over she’d been in a quandary. If Travis was asking them to move in, she would have to notify Officer Marshall, even though her final probation hearing was scheduled for the day after the special election. On the other hand, if she was just ‘staying over’… but Travis had made his intent very clear. And strangely, it felt right. They already spent so much time together over here that Dax had a toothbrush and a spare set of pajamas for the nights they worked late. How would Dax feel about her sleeping in the same bed as Travis?
Only one way to find out.
Travis brought the SUV to a stop and turned to her. “Wait here.” He hopped out and sprinted to the porch, returning a moment later underneath an umbrella, with a second in his hand. He opened her door and handed her the folded one. “I’ll bring in Dax.”
She opened the umbrella and hopped through the puddles, jumping up the porch steps. Dax clung to Travis, arms wrapped tightly around the big man’s neck, as he carried the boy from the vehicle. The tenderness he demonstrated to Dax hit her smack in the center of her chest. Travis set Dax down next to her and unlocked the door. “Welcome home.” He turned to her with an eager smile and extended his hand.
She’d have to get used to carrying a key. Taking a big breath, she smiled back, and slipped her hand in his.
He pulled her across the threshold and led them upstairs. He opened the first door on the right. “This is my old room. Now it’s my weight room. Dax, you can come in here anytime, as long as there’s an adult with you. Got it?”
Dax’s nodded solemnly, eyes like saucers.
Then Travis opened the next door on the left. “This is your room, buddy. It used to belong to my brother, Colton. Come on in. Take a look.”
Dax stepped into the room, taking in the rodeo posters plastered on the walls. “Is your brother a cowboy?” he asked, voice full of awe.
Travis’s face pulled tight and a muscle ticked in his jaw. Dax didn’t notice, he was too busy staring at the posters of cowboys on bucking bulls and broncos. But she could tell it pained Travis to be in here. His shoulders tensed and he kept drumming his fingers on his thigh. If they stayed, maybe they could paint the room for Dax, make it new for both of them.
“He is,” Travis answered warily.
“Can he show me how to do that?” Dax pointed to a picture of a cowboy on the back of a bucking bronco, feet airborne, head tossed back, hand in the air.
Travis huffed out a wry laugh. “He rodeos and isn’t here.” He reached down and ruffled Dax’s hair. “But, you get good at riding Sunny and we can discuss the rodeo later.”
Dax stared up at him critically. “Promise?”
Elaine smothered a laugh. There was something totally endearing about the way Dax negotiated concessions from Travis.
Travis stuck out his hand. “Promise.”
They shook, and Travis pulled him into a hug. “C’mere. I want to show you something.” He straightened and led them across the hall to another shut door.
Elaine stared uneasily at the enormous lock protruding above the handle. It looked like a deadbolt. There was no way she was staying in a room with a lock that big on it. She’d rather camp out on the couch.
The door fell open silently with a turn of the handle. Travis gestured into the large master room, dominated by a king-sized bed. “I thought your mom and I could sleep in here, so we’re right across the hall from each other.”
Elaine’s throat clutched. This was all happening too fast. She should have thought to prepare Dax. Suss out his feelings beforehand. She gave Travis an apologetic grimace but he shook his head just barely.
Dax looked at the bed and back to Travis, a serious expression on his tiny face. “Like you’re my dad?”
All the air squeezed out of her lungs. The longing in his voice was palpable. Travis would make a great dad, but she couldn’t ask him to be that to Dax. This was too much. She never should have agreed to come. She’d talk to Travis as soon as Dax went to bed and set things straight.
Travis bent and placed his hands on his knees, gazing steadily at Dax. “Well, I was hoping we could discuss that, man to man. See, your mom and I love each other. What do you think about that?”
Dax lifted his eyes to the ceiling, thinking. After a moment he nodded. “I think that’s okay.”
“Now, I’ve never been a dad before, but if I was a dad, I’d want a kid like you.”
Dax puffed up, a smile spreading across his face.
Her heart had to still be beating – she was still standing. Her insides felt tossed around like an upside-down salt shaker. She bit down on her lip unsure of what to expect next.
Dax toed the fringe of the rug. “I’ve never had a dad.”
“Would you like one?” Elaine perked up at the husky note in Travis’s voice. She wasn’t the only one with her heart in her throat.
Dax shrugged and nodded. Of all the things she’d never been able to give her son, raising him without a father hurt her the most. But raising him with a revolving door of bad examples would have been far worse.
“Do you think we can try it for a bit?” Travis asked. “See how it’s like?”
Dax nodded slowly. “Does that mean you love me?”
Her hand flew to her mouth, too late to cover the astonished squeak that escaped.
Travis’s face was a study of emotion, but he nodded and pulled Dax in for a hug. “Yeah,” he said throatily. “It does. I love you kiddo.”
Hot tears pierced her eyelids as Dax snuggled into Travis’s embrace. She caught a muffled I love you too as Dax spoke into Travis’s midsection. When their gazes locked, Travis’s eyes were shiny and soft. Thank you, she mouthed silently. He shrugged, an expression of wonder on his face. “I mean it,” he said gruffly. “All of it.”
Once Dax had run off to play downstairs, Travis pulled her into an embrace. “You think he’ll like it here?” he asked gruffly.
“I think he’ll do just fine.” She swiveled her head eyeing the door. “But you can’t lock this door.”
His body tensed. “Why not?”
“I can’t sleep in a room with a locked door.”
“The door locks for your safety.”
“But we’re safe here, Travis. I can understand and agree to locking the front door at night. This is a big house. But not the bedroom.” Heat prickled over her scalp. “Besides, if Dax is across the hall, I want him to know he can come in if he needs me.”
“And I don’t want him to barge in on us accidentally,” Travis growled back.
Elaine pushed against him, stepping back. “I don’t see why you’re so obsessed with keeping everyone in.”
“It’s keeping people out that I’m worried about, and you know why,” he ground out. “And I’m slowly getting better, you know that.” He crossed his arms. “But what I don’t know and you’ve refused to say is why you’re obsessed with keeping things unlocked.” He stared pointedly at her, raising his eyebrows in expectation. “Start talkin’ darlin’.”
Fear raced down her spine, chilling her all the way to her fingertips. She’d never confessed this to anyone. Not that she’d ever been close enough to anyone to confide something this personal, this… mortifying. She snuck a peek at him through her lowered lashes. Immovable.
“When I was small, younger than Dax, I-I…” Heat exploded on her face. She squeezed her eyes shut tamping down the ugly memory, the terror. “I was locked in a closet as a form of discipline.” Even now, she could feel the darkness pressing in on her. The stuffy, hot air choking her.
Travis made an awful noise and her eyes jerked up. Every muscle in his body clenched, poised to pounce or mete out justice. Fear snaked through her. How would he react when she disclosed the rest? “There’s more,” she murmured thickly, struggling to push out the words through a constricted throat. Keeping her eyes pinned to a square on the rug, she forced out the rest. “A few years ago… before we moved here, there was an incident.” She swallowed down the bile that rose up her throat. Lawson had made it clear what would happen to her or to Travis if she ever spoke of the incident. “I… a person locked me in a room and tried to hurt me,” she blurted, fighting the wave of nausea that swarmed her belly. “I-I got away before anything significant happened, but I promised myself I’d always have an escape route after that.” Her heart pounded ferociously.
“Who?” Travis’s voice was lethal. Hard.
“I-it doesn’t matter.”
“Like hell it doesn’t,” he bit out. “I’ll deal with him.”
She’d never seen him like this. Unyielding. Deadly. This was Travis the warrior. For a terrifying moment, she imagined seeing his face on the other end of a rifle. Or worse. A shiver skittered across her shoulders.
“Did you ever report it?”
She shook her head once. “It wouldn’t have made a difference.”
“Why not?”
She let out a bitter laugh. “Who would I have told? He had all the power. And no one saw us. He made sure no one saw him. It would have been my word against his, and who would believe a–” she caught herself. Who would believe a girl with a record accusing a cop who’d positioned himself as unassailable? No one. “Someone like me?” she finished sadly.
Travis scrubbed a hand across his jaw and shook his head. When he looked at her, his eyes were bright with anger. She cringed, bracing herself for his unleashed fury. She couldn’t help it, and hated herself when she saw the hurt look in his eyes. “I will never hurt you.” His voice came out full of gravel. “Never. And I will deal handily with anyone who does.” He swooped down and gave her a hard kiss. “The lock will come off tomorrow.” He stalked out of the room before she thought to stop him.
She wanted so badly to lay everything out. To explain herself. But she couldn’t do that to him right before the election. Not only would it add to his stress and pull his focus from the campaign, but the backlash over her record would ruin his chances. Cause such a big blow up. Not to mention cost Dottie precious business. People in this town weren’t ready for a known criminal in their midst. She couldn’t do that to either of them. Once her hearing was over and she’d been released, and it was all in the past, then maybe she and Dottie could talk to Travis together. Explain everything. Just nine days.