I didn’t want to be a dick, but I couldn’t help myself. From the moment I’d seen Rae, I’d wanted back between her thighs, but more than that, I’d wanted to get to know her too. And yet every time she tried to get to know me, I pushed her away. It was self-preservation at its worst.

The truth was, I wasn’t used to opening up to people, much less women. Since Sonia, I’d been strictly a one-and-done type of guy. Which was all well and good when I’d been in the Army and could use that as my excuse, but I wasn’t getting any younger. Sooner or later, I imagined I’d want to settle down and start a family. Not that I was looking to do that now, but that didn’t mean I should be treating Rae like one of those disposable women from my past either. Especially since I’d been the one to pursue … whatever this was growing into.

With Gage’s warnings about her past echoing through my head, and knowing the demons she carried, I’d tried to keep my distance, but the second I’d seen those lyrics she’d written about me—about how she’d never stopped thinking about our first night together—there was no fucking way I could keep my hands to myself. And now here we were, locked away in the middle of the goddamn woods, and I couldn’t even bring myself to have a motherfucking conversation with her. Maybe if we talked about something other than my family or my past, I could get through it like a civilized human being. Eventually she was bound to ask why discussing these topics was off limits, and I was pretty sure she wouldn’t accept being told they just were.

But before I could figure a way out of the mess I’d created, Rae was standing in the doorway, her arms crossed over her chest, her face unreadable.

I stood and gestured to the seat across from me. “I poured you water with lemon.”

“Thanks,” she said, sauntering forward and picking up the glass and taking long, slow drink, her throat bobbing gracefully as she swallowed. Remembering how she looked swallowing down something else entirely, my dick thickened. Down boy.

Setting the empty tumbler back in its place, she strolled to the counter and hopped up, eschewing the seat I’d offered. “Earlier,” she started, “you mentioned something about Staufferson’s updates, and how none of them are ever important. Have there been ones other than what you’ve already told me about?”

Shit, I knew that tone. She was itching for a fight. I might not have a lot of experience with relationships, but I liked to think I was a smart man, and when a woman talked to you in that voice, you were in trouble. At least I didn’t have to wonder where I’d made a wrong turn. My stunt in the studio when I’d left her sitting naked on the sofa was to blame for her barely restrained fury.

I stared at Rae for a beat, willing her to return to the sweet woman I enjoyed spending time with, but it was like I was looking at a statue. She gazed right through me, stone faced with cold eyes. She wasn’t just pissed; she was fucking livid.

“Can we talk for a second before I jump into that?”

“I’d like to stick to discussing Staufferson’s updates, if you don’t mind,” she answered.

Her tone was condescending and clear: she was the client and I was the employee. We were on her dime, and I needed to fall in line. Well, fuck that. I was good at my job because I could read situations and predict outcomes better than most; could read people and know what they were thinking and what their next move would be. I’d excelled at being a soldier because my intuition was always spot on. And right now, everything about what Staufferson had relayed two days prior seemed like a false lead. I didn’t have anything to back that feeling up except for instinct and training, but both were telling me his latest news had nothing to do with Rae’s stalker.

And yet I knew that if I kept this information from her—even if I thought it was for her own good—would make her go ape shit when she eventually found out. Because that was the crux of it. Whether it was Rocky or Charlotte, or even Staufferson himself, every piece of information about her case would eventually make its way back to Rae. Withholding details about a wild goose chase might make my life easier in the short term, but in the long term it would only backfire. So as much as I hated being the goddamn messenger, I geared myself up to fill her in.

“Noones isn’t the only problem.” She winced, but otherwise her face remained impassive. “There’s another lead, and the police are trying to determine whether there’s a connection between the two. There’s also some online drama that’s causing difficulty with the case.”

While she’d tried to put up a brave front, the longer I spoke, the more her façade broke down. I could see in the white of her knuckles pressed into the countertop, the firm set of her jaw, and the rigid posture of her spine that Rae was fighting to hold onto her thin veneer of calm. She was holding herself in check, but she was barely holding it together. One wrong word from me and she’d be flying off that counter in a rage, all her ire directed at me. On the one hand, the hate fuck afterward would be explosive and the make-up sex after that extraordinary, but I wasn’t really an asshole. I only played one on TV. I genuinely liked Rae, and didn’t want to hurt her any more than I already was.

“For the record, I wanted you to hear all this from Charlotte or Rocky since you and I have differing opinions about what you need to know, when, and why, but I was out voted so …” I shrugged and shuffled the mail that one of my guys had delivered a few minutes ago. A stack of bills and advertisements for some stores the next county over made up the bulk of it. I looked up and my eyes found hers.

“Unfortunately, there’s been increased online speculation that you’re not actually recording your album in England. The talk is you’re back in rehab. Apparently, when the first promo for your interview with Trombley aired, some people picked it apart. The Sitka spruce and native Oregon pines found here aren’t exactly abundant in England. This new round of speculation has set off what Charlotte called a ‘Twitter war’ between your fans and your ex-husband’s and his girlfriend’s.”

Rae nodded. “Nothing new on that front. What else?"

I stared at her for a beat, and a million thoughts flashed through my mind. But the one that echoed the loudest was I hadn’t signed up for this. My job was to protect her; not the be the outlet for her misery. Even as I told myself I was being selfish, I couldn’t seem to push that thought away, and eventually, it bubbled over.

“Look, I know you’re pissed, but I’m your bodyguard; not your goddamn assistant or something. I’m an Army Fucking Ranger, so I’d appreciate you treating me like one or I’m telling Rocky he needs to find someone else.”

Her eyes flashed with fury. “No, you look.” She jumped down from her perch and pointed at me. “It’s your firm that came up with this stupid fucking plan to hide out in the woods with no one but you for company—and don’t think I don’t know what that was all about—so without my real goddamn assistant, one of you is going to have to step in and fill that void. As long as I’m paying McClintock Security, that can be you.” She took a deep breath and tilted her head. “Or you can fly one of your goddamn buddies out here to join us. Take your pick. Either way, someone is giving me a daily fucking update.”

I stared at her mutely, not knowing whether to shake her or kiss her. She had the power to irritate me like no one had ever before, but I was also damn proud of her for standing up for herself.

But rather than telling her any of that, I said, “My apologies. You’re right.” And because she was right, I launched right into the rest of my report. “Your label has fielded an increased number of calls requesting confirmation of your whereabouts. Staufferson’s team is looking into one particular caller. While the label has given everyone the same line about you being in England, this woman claims her call is a matter of urgency.”

“Did she leave a name?”

Something about Rae’s reaction—or rather, her non-reaction—set off my Spidey sense, and not in the typical way. If I wasn’t mistaken, she wasn’t surprised by this news at all. A part of me wondered. Rae had mentioned her childhood a time or two, about how hard she’d had it growing up, but she hadn’t spoken a word about her mother in anything but the past tense. It was almost as if the day she’d won that singing competition, she’d left her old life far behind, including everyone who’d been a part of it.

I watched her face for any sign that I was right, but her mask never cracked. “No, but the receptionist is certain it’s the same woman each time. She refuses to leave a message, and then curses them out for not patching her through. Almost as if she believes you’re just sitting there waiting to hear from her.”

Rae jumped down from her perch. “That sounds about right,” she commented before walking out of the room. And just like I’d done earlier, she never looked back.

I scratched my chin, deep in thought. Since it looked like Rae wasn’t going to tell me who the mystery caller was and I’d need that information for Staufferson so he didn’t go barking up the wrong tree, I was confident Gage could get Charlotte to fill him in. Over the years, he’d managed to pry loose much more valuable secrets than this from far tighter sources. Shit, at the rate he was going, the President would have to award a Medal of Honor to my cousin’s dick for all the intelligence gathering it had done in America’s name.

Which got me thinking about all the action my dick was no longer going to get as long as Rae stayed pissed at me. It didn’t take a genius to know that until I opened up to her, she was going to remain closed off to me. If I wasn’t careful, the longing I had for her body was going to push me to start talking about things I never talked about, just so I could have her underneath me again. That, or I’d wind up throwing her over my shoulder and tying her to my bed so that I could have her any time I wanted. She might not want anything to do with me anymore, but I knew I could make her body surrender to me with just a few expert touches.

I looked down at my shaking hands and groaned. Rae might be the addict, but I was hooked on the sweet, sweet taste of her. Desperately. And I already needed my next fix. Which was all the more reason to stay away.