Brooke drove us home, and I was thankful. Even though she had made me feel significantly better, I couldn’t stop the tears from falling down my face. I was too overwhelmed. Too sensitive. Too raw.
When we pulled up outside our apartment building, I was ready to jump out of the car to get to Tucker. I didn’t realize how badly I needed him until that moment. The feeling consumed me.
I opened the door to the car and was climbing out, when Brooke grabbed my wrist to stop me.
“Kennedy, hold on just a second.”
I wasn’t listening though. I had no interest in sitting there a second longer. My only thought was getting to Tucker. His touch would take everything away. I craved it.
I should have listened to her though.
When I turned back toward our apartment, my heart came to a complete halt.
Tucker was standing in the doorway to our building talking to a woman. He was facing me, and I could only see the back of her head. He ran his hand over her forehead and tucked her hair behind her ear. Something he constantly did to me. Something that I loved.
I couldn’t catch my breath.
His body shook with laughter as she said something to him. When he tugged her small body into his and kissed her on the forehead, I stopped torturing myself and looked away.
He knew I wouldn’t be here.
I knew that this was too good to be true.
There was a valuable lesson to be learned from my parents, and it was that no one could be trusted. No one except for Brooke.
She was still in the car, and she was looking up at me with pity in her eyes. It was a look that I hated. I despised it.
“Get in, love. Let’s go for a drive.”
I didn’t have to think long on what she said. I wasn’t walking into our building, I was running, and I didn’t care where we ended up.
…
It was one o’clock in the morning by the time the taxi pulled up in front of our building. I was drunk as a skunk and so was the guy who was sitting beside me. Brooke was giving me dirty looks from my other side, but I was avoiding looking in her direction.
We had drive around for about an hour before we ended up at a hole in the wall bar. The tequila shots were flowing and although Brooke begged me to slow down, I didn’t listen to her. I just wanted to completely erase the day, and alcohol was my only option to do so.
The only time I did listen to Brooke was when she reminded me that my final shoot with Rock Bottom was the next day at noon. Her words penetrated my drunken brain enough for me to realize that I needed to go home, but not enough for me to realize I needed to go home alone.
“What about you and Liam?” I asked, curiously.
“What about me and Liam?” She looked away from me as she took a sip of her drink.
“You never told me what happened between you two. Do you like him?”
She stared down at her drink for a moment before looking back at me. “It doesn’t matter what happened between us. It’s in the past. Liam doesn’t want anything with me and that is all that matters.”
“Guys fucking suck.”
She nodded her head in agreement before raising her glass to mine.
“Cheers,” we both said in unison before downing the rest of our drinks.
Tucker had blown my phone up around eleven, and I tortured myself by listening to one of his voicemails. He sounded sincere as he talked about him being worried that I hadn’t made it home from my parents’ yet. It made me want to march into his apartment and demand to know if he was worried about me when he was with another woman. Instead, I turned off my phone and didn’t look at it again. I wasn’t his business to worry about anymore.
I wasn’t his concern.
The guy sitting next to me was only concerned with one thing and that was exactly what I needed. He could help me forget this day. To forget Tucker.
I giggled as I missed a step but my newfound friend, whose name I couldn’t remember, caught me and smiled down at me. Brooke wasn’t smiling though. She was pissed.
She had no right to be though. She was always the one telling me that I needed to get out more. That I needed to get laid.
We followed Brooke to our floor, his arms wrapped around my waist. They felt foreign on my skin, wrong almost, but I wouldn’t let it get to me. I needed this. I didn’t care who he was.
Brooke stopped suddenly when she walked into our door, and I ran into her back.
“Whoa there.” The guy whose name I forgot pulled me back against him. I turned my head to smile at him but I stopped short when I heard his voice.
A voice that had no business talking to me.
“Who in the fuck are you?”
I looked over at Tucker and drew in a sharp breath. He looked like shit. I had never seen him look anything other than perfect, but there he stood completely disheveled. He looked worried, he looked upset, and I wanted to run to him to take it all away. Then thoughts of him with that other woman flashed into my mind, and I straightened my spine and hardened my heart.
“Ummm, Kennedy.” The guy’s hands on my hips tightened as he looked at the rage in Tucker’s face.
“Don’t fucking talk to her.” Tucker stormed toward us. “If you plan on living through the night, I suggest you get your fucking hands off my girl and leave immediately.”
“Fuck you, Tucker,” I yelled. “You do not have to leave.” I looked behind me.
“I think I’m going to go.” His hands let go of my hips and he backed toward the door while keeping his eyes on Tucker.
When the door closed behind him, I walked past Tucker to my bedroom.
“Where in the hell do you think you are going?” He grabbed my wrist before I could completely get away, and I saw Brooke sneak into her bedroom out of the corner of my eye.
“I’m going to bed, Tucker. I’ve had a horrible day, and I’m tired.” I jerked my arm but his grip held strong.
“What happened? Why were you with that guy?” His voice was still angry but I could see the vulnerability in his eyes. It almost broke me. Almost.
“Why not, Tucker? We’re nothing more than a couple fuck buddies, right? We should be able to fuck whoever we want.”
He jerked back from me like I had physically hit him and my arm dropped to my side like it weighed a hundred pounds.
“So, this past weekend meant nothing?” His brown eyes were boring into mine waiting for me to answer.
“Apparently not.”
He stared down at me for several seconds. It wasn’t a look that I liked. It was as if he had never truly seen me before, but I guess it was fitting considering I had never expected to see this side of him either.
He didn’t say another word. He just turned his back to me and walked out. The sound of the slamming door echoing throughout the empty room.
…
The sound of my alarm going off sliced through my head as if it was actually assaulting me. I could barely open my eyes even though my room had very little light shining into it. I managed to hit my phone enough to make the noise stop before I ran to my bathroom to empty the contents of my stomach.
Memories of the day before ran through my head, and I prayed that it was all a nightmare. Every last bit of it. But I knew it wasn’t. The pain was too real. Too raw. I felt it everywhere.
Brooke walked into my bathroom as I wiped my mouth with a piece of toilet paper.
“How are you feeling?”
“Please don’t yell at me.” I laid my head against the toilet.
“How are you feeling?” she whispered while leaning against the bathroom wall.
“Like shit.”
“You should after last night.”
I flopped onto the bathroom floor and let the coolness of the tile seep into my skin.
“I barely remember last night.”
“Do you remember destroying Tucker?” She crossed her arms over her chest.
“You’re taking his side?” I peeked up at her.
“I’m not taking anyone’s side. What I am saying is that he looked fucking destroyed last night. He didn’t look like someone who was cheating on you just a few hours before.”
I thought about what she just said, but it didn’t make any sense. I knew what I saw. I wasn’t crazy.
“But you saw him.” I sat back up and grabbed my stomach when I felt like I was going to lose its contents again.
“I know, but maybe there is an explanation. Maybe we didn’t see what we thought we saw.”
“My life isn’t a romance movie, Brooke. I’m the girl who gets cheated on and ends up alone surrounded by her books and cats. I’m not the one who ends up with happily ever after.”
“I don’t believe that.” She shook her head.
“Well, you should start believing it. The sooner we figure it out the less likely we are to get hurt.”
“Maybe you should just talk to him,” she said softly, knowing I wouldn’t like her idea.
“I have to get ready for work.”
She turned her back and walked out of my bathroom with a shake of her head. I could feel her disappointment radiating off her, but it didn’t change anything. I didn’t want to see Tucker. I had trusted him, completely, and the only thing that got me was heartbreak.