I slapped my leather work gloves against my jeans, knocking the dirt loose, and glanced to Lucy who stood beside me, hands on hips as we surveyed our work.

“Are you sure that weird corner window they want isn’t going to be a nightmare?” Lucy asked, turning to face me. She had dirt streaked on one cheek, her blonde hair was tumbling loose from its ponytail, and she looked as weary as I felt.

We’d pushed hard today and finished the framing for the home on this project. With Cade’s absence an ever-present ache in my heart, so strong it was visceral, I’d thrown myself into work. I looked up to the corner Lucy was referencing. The owners wanted a corner window that was sort of a bay window times two. It wasn’t common and involved some extra angles, but I wasn’t concerned.

“Nah. We already did the hard part today,” I replied with a shrug.

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Yeah, and it was a pain in the ass.”

“Right, so we’re done now.”

Lucy glanced to her watch and back to me. “Damn. It’s almost nine o’clock. You’re a workaholic with Cade gone. It’s a good thing I have no social life.”

I laughed and turned to walk toward our work truck. “You have a social life. You just act like you don’t.”

Lucy walked alongside me. “Not really. My social life consists of hanging out with you and maybe a few others. Hanging out with you has taken a serious hit since your lover boy moved back. I never thought I’d say Earl was great, but you and him didn’t do much together. You and Cade are glued to each other,” Lucy grumbled good-naturedly.

I tossed my gloves in the back of the truck and took the toolbox Lucy handed me from where it had been sitting on the ground. I leaned my hips against the truck and eyed Lucy. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to seem like I was blowing you off.”

Lucy’s eyes softened. “Hey girl, just teasing. I’m happy for you. Cade obviously adores you. It’s just an adjustment for me. Even though you weren’t single, you kinda were with Earl. Now I have to get used to my bestie actually having a life.”

I felt my cheeks heat and was relieved for the wispy light of the late evening. “I guess it’s been so good to have Cade home that I kinda shut everything else out. My mom stopped by last night and said something along the same lines. Even when he’s back from the fire, let’s make sure we have girls’ night at least once a week. But before that, let’s plan to finish work at a halfway decent hour tomorrow and grab some dinner and drinks at Wildlands.”

Lucy flashed a grin and stepped close to throw her arms around me for a quick hug. When she stepped back, her eyes were warm. “I really was just teasing, you know?”

“I know, but still. Even if it’s awesome to have Cade back and things seem to be going great with us, I can’t let him take over my life.” I paused and eyed Lucy. “Plus, are you ever even going to think about dating? Man, woman, fish, bear? Anyone?”

Lucy burst out laughing and swatted me on the arm. “It just never seems worth the trouble. You know the bears, the fish and the women aren’t my thing. But then men aren’t really either. I think I’m too me.”

I snorted. “You’re too you? What the hell does that mean?”

Lucy crossed her arms and shrugged. I could feel her defensiveness. Lucy might have become my closest friend over the last few years, but Lucy definitely had stuff she preferred not to talk about, most particularly relationships. I knew enough about her to piece together that something had gone sideways at some point before she moved to Willow Brook in high school, but Lucy never spoke of it and was an expert at friendly evasion.

Maybe it was because I’d just had my own major jolt of awareness when I almost married a man I didn’t love and who didn’t love me. Maybe it was because it seemed like now was an okay time to push a little, but I did. I looked over at Lucy when Lucy looked away and pressed her. “Seriously, Lucy. I could care less if you told me you wanted to be single for the rest of your life, or if you said you were an alien who couldn’t consider mating with a human, but that’s not it. You’re so awesome and funny and even though you dress like a man, you are fucking gorgeous and don’t even try to argue with me on that. Something happened and you don’t have to tell me about it, but maybe think about what it means to let something rule your life like that. I get it because I did. It may not seem like much, but I fell apart after everything blew up with Cade. I let that rule too many choices I made and almost made a huge mistake because of it. I don’t know what it is that makes it so you try to act like no one is ever worth it when it comes to romance. Maybe they’re not, but let it be because that’s what you really want not just because you’re scared.”

Lucy went still while I spoke, so still I started to worry I’d miscalculated. “Hey, look…”

Lucy shook her head sharply, her blue eyes blazing bright in the dusky light. “It’s okay. I’d say something about like this to you if the situation were reversed. I’ve been beating myself up for not being more pushy with you about Earl. I probably would’ve if I’d seen you and Cade together the first go-round.”

Objectively, I knew Lucy was a petite person, but I tended to forget because Lucy carried herself with such a sense of forcefulness. She came across as strong, confident, and independent, and she was all of those things. But right now, she looked diminished. Her small shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath.

Lucy looked away and then back again. “Someday I might talk about it more, but let’s just say high school sucked for me. When we moved here, it was amazing because no one knew me and pretty much left me alone and that was so much better.”

I wasn’t sure what to say, so I stepped to Lucy and pulled her into a hug, trying to impart the same kind of strength I felt when Lucy hugged me. When I drew back, Lucy’s expression had regained some of its zest. She chewed on the inside of her cheek and eyed me. “You driving?”

“Yup.” I tugged the keys out of my pocket and hopped in the truck.

In short order, we were in the back parking lot behind the office. Lucy waved as she climbed into her car and drove away. I checked to make sure I’d locked up and headed out in my car, aiming straight for the grocery store. In the short time Cade had been away, I’d slid right back to my old habits of eating mostly takeout and quick dinners. With Cade around, we both liked to cook, but without him here, I wasn’t much interested.

Before heading home, I stopped by the grocery store. I was meandering through, laughing at myself as I shopped because I kept wanting to buy items for meals I wanted to make with Cade, yet I didn’t even know when he’d be home. I was dawdling in the produce section when I felt someone stop beside me. I glanced over to see Shannon standing there. A fierce flash of anger jolted me. On its heels was a spinning, falling feeling where everything felt off kilter, and I was hot and cold inside. I hated the fact Shannon had any effect on me, but she did.

Shannon’s long dark hair was drawn away from her face with a bright blue headband, which matched her eyes. She rested a hand on her hip and eyed me. “Hello,” she finally said.

I stared at her, trying to beat back the sick feeling churning in my stomach and wondering what the hell to say. Shannon had once been my friend, or so I’d believed. We’d both grown up in Willow Brook and been close in middle school and high school. We’d gone to college in different areas, so we’d grown apart, but I had never worried about Shannon trying to make a move on Cade back then. As I stood there, considering what to say, I realized I didn’t owe Shannon a damn thing. There was that and the fact I could hardly stand to see her. I didn’t like it, but those old seeds of doubt she’d planted inside about me and about Cade were still there. Cade and I were too fresh, too new again for me to feel solid yet. It was also terrifying to think about allowing myself to trust in us again because I had before. Completely. After a moment, I turned and started to walk away.

I stopped abruptly when I felt Shannon’s hand curl around my arm. I gave it a rough shake and spun back. “Don’t.”

Shannon shook her head, her cheeks bright and her eyes angry. “Grow up, Amelia. Are you going to pretend like I don’t exist forever?”

My mouth fell open. I snapped it shut. “Shannon, you manufactured the whole fucking thing with Cade before. All of it was you and all of it was a lie. I guess you can feel proud because it worked, but not anymore. Leave me alone, and leave Cade alone.”

Shannon shook her head in disgust, something shifting subtly in her eyes. “Tell yourself whatever story you want. Cade’s gone again, isn’t he?”

I forced my expression to stay calm, but instantly my thoughts were spinning. How did Shannon know anything about where Cade was?

Shannon drummed her fingertips on the cart handle, a sneer curling her lips. “I’m sure you’re wondering how I might know anything about Cade’s schedule. Why don’t you keep on wondering?”

I didn’t dare let Shannon dictate this encounter. Fury knotting in my chest, I forced myself to stay calm. Without a word, I turned and walked away. I wanted to run, but I didn’t. I measured my steps on the way to the checkout register.

I managed to get through that without losing my shit and walked quickly out to the parking lot. I set the groceries on the passenger seat and climbed into the car. My phone chirped, and I slipped it out of my pocket to see Cade’s name flash on the screen. Tapping the banner, his text opened up.

Hey babe, got some cell reception when we flew over just now. Won’t be back for three more days at least. Miss you.

That did it. I should’ve been happy he texted. Instead, all the ugliness and doubt I thought I’d cast aside were spinning in a tight circle in my mind. Seeing Shannon made me feel physically ill. Everything was all tangled up, and I just wanted to go home and forget about it all. My heart was pounding in a frantic, shallow beat and my breath was short. I couldn’t love someone the way I loved Cade and fall apart like this. I kept trying to tell myself Shannon was just playing games.

I was so fraught, I never replied to Cade’s text.