~Bladen~
The hours pass one into the next as I worship her body. She’s my every dream become a reality. Having her like this, I will never be able to leave her again. No matter the risk, there is no way I can walk away, not ever.
I hate that she’s struggled. Seeing her so skinny, knowing it’s because of her lifestyle, I promise myself to make sure she never feels this again. Money will never be an issue again.
Before I can wake her, my phone starts ringing. Looking to the caller ID, I see it’s Deacon.
“Rise and shine,” he greets as soon as I slide to accept.
“Deacon, sleep is a good thing, brother. Learn it.”
Tamalyn stirs, and I see the shock on her face that I’m still here. Well, I’m not going anywhere so she will get used to it. Morning after awkward time commences now.
“Tempy wants to talk to Tamalyn.”
I don’t hesitate in handing Tamalyn the phone. I know she’s close with her cousin. Even before we left, she would have secret talks with Tempest almost daily while her father was at work. Then to live so close for so long, this separation must be hard on them both.
I get up and take a leak behind the curtain, giving them a moment. Then I slide on my jeans before stepping outside.
The sun is shining, but the heat in Utah is nothing like the Carolinas—no humidity. I enjoy letting my skin soak up some rays while I think about getting Tamalyn back to Tennessee at least for a visit with Tempest. It’s not long before the dry air makes me feel like my skin is tightening and my pores are closing. Maybe the humidity isn’t so bad after all.
A spark catches my eye, and I look over at the pinwheel in the early morning glow. Damn.
My mind goes back to the prevention parade day.
“One day, we’re gonna have a yard and always keep a pinwheel out front, Bladen. One day, we’re gonna be on the other side of all this,” Tamalyn tells me proudly.
We were in our early teens, sophomores in high school. Tamalyn had a part-time job at a snow cone stand and used her own money to buy a pinwheel. Our first.
“Baby, I’ll give anything I can to see us there.”
I take a deep breath. Is this what it feels like to be on the other side of it all? Can we really have a life now?
Looking out toward the driveway, I see my bike. My freedom. It was the piece of me that kept me sane when I pulled away from Haven’s Harbor, leaving her behind and knowing I wouldn’t turn back. I had to get the distance between us and my bike gave me the opportunity. I held onto having her with me and never got a new bike because this is the one Tamalyn was on.
I hear the door open. Turning, I see her in a T-shirt and shorts. Her eyes meet mine, a calm within the storm looking back at me.
This moment is the most beautiful moment of my lifetime. She’s free from the past. No matter what the future holds, I gave her that.
“Good morning,” I say with a rasp in my voice as I struggle with my own emotions.
“Tempest wants me to come back to Tennessee.”
I see the war in her mind. She doesn’t want this.
“I promise it’s safe, Tamalyn.”
She blows out a breath. “It’s not that. I don’t know where I belong. If he’s gone, if the past is no more, then what do I do with my life?”
Taking her by the hand, I lead us back inside her shed. With only a chair in the corner, I sit down and pull her onto my lap.
“Good question. I’ve spent so many years focused on keeping you out of the line, I don’t know what to do, either.”
She pinches me, and I raise my eyebrow.
“Is this real?”
I laugh. God, when was the last time I could relax and laugh? I can’t remember a time, not ever. Even when we were together, I couldn’t relax. I didn’t know from one day to the next what she was going home to or what I would find in my own house.
“No more going it alone,” I say, knowing I need her in my life.
“Really?”
I did this. I took away her confidence in me, in us. Leaving like I did and not making contact, even if I felt it was the right thing at the time, it was wrong.
“Don’t know what the future holds except you’re in it, baby.”
“I can’t just up and leave from here. Benny is too old to be working behind a bar. Tommy is unreliable.”
“Love that you found a place and got comfortable, Tamalyn.”
She doesn’t relax, which has me on edge.
“It’s all too fast.”
Well, that isn’t what I wanted to hear, but it’s the truth.
“Made mistakes. Don’t want to waste any more time. I don’t want to be without you, Tamalyn. Did that. Hit the road, and every second was misery without you. Ride with me, baby. Let me square away Benny’s situation, and then ride with me. Let’s go see Tempest. From there, it’s wherever you want to go. The world is your map, and I’m your driver; pick your destination.”
“You make it sound so easy.”