Emme
We walked back out to the kitchen where Zane grabbed plates and I sliced the pie. It was still just warm enough. I pulled the frozen yogurt out of the freezer and placed a scoop on top of each piece. After putting the frozen yogurt back, I turned to find Zane holding both plates and walking back into the great room. I wanted to jump for joy that we were going to that room, but didn’t want him to think I was completely crazy so I kept it together and followed behind him.
Zane set the plates down on the coffee table and walked to the fireplace to turn it on. The only lights on were the two recessed lights spotlighting the fireplace. They were already dimmed. When he came back to the couch he asked, “Are you going to sit?”
My body and my heart were currently battling with my brain over where to sit. My brain wanted to wait until Zane sat so that I could make sure enough distance was between us. Unfortunately, he called me out so now I had to sit first. Sure enough, as soon as I sat Zane was right next to me. At least the other two parts of my body were satisfied.
He picked up the plates and handed one to me before he focused his attention on his own plate. I watched him while he took the first bite. He closed his eyes as he savored the taste of it. I knew in that moment he really liked it and that made me smile.
More happy for the day.
“Good?” I asked as I brought my first bite to my mouth.
“Fucking amazing, Emme. Where did you learn to cook?” he asked while taking another bite.
“Mostly self-taught. I have a few things I make that are family recipes from my mom or my grandmother, but most of the stuff I cook is my own. If I’m looking for something new to make I’ll search online for different recipes and then tweak them to my own personal tastes or ideas on what I think will be good together. The apple pie is one of my own recipes and I’m so happy you like it.”
“So, there’s another thing I can add to the list,” he offered.
“List?” I asked, as I realized he was nearly done with his pie and I was barely halfway through mine.
“Of things you’re good at.”
I chewed and swallowed another bite, but said nothing. Zane set his empty plate back on the coffee table and used his fork to slice through a piece of my pie. After he put the forkful of the pie and frozen yogurt in his mouth he looked to me and winked. Curiosity got the best of me and I said, “Dare I ask what’s on that list?”
“Well, baking pie for one,” he began. “Dinner is another. I’ve had two dinners you’ve made so far and both were incredible. Cookies. You’re very good at making those. Haven’t seen a ton of your work, but saw one picture today that I particularly liked. Seeing just that one, I’m willing to go out on a limb and say you’re a really good photographer. Our friendship is relatively new, but you have these long-standing friendships with three other girls that you’ve known for years so I’m guessing you’re a great friend, too.”
“Wow, Zane. That was very nice to hear. Thank you,” I said as I put my now empty plate on the coffee table.
“Sweetheart, I didn’t even get to the best part of the list.”
“Oh. Well, what else is there?” I asked curiously.
“Kissing. You’re a great fucking kisser. I’d even go so far as to say it’s the best of all your talents I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing,” he shared with a bright intensity in his eyes.
I thought back to the last kiss I shared with Zane. I looked to his lips, licked my own, and swallowed hard. Zane’s hand came up to wrap around the side of my neck just under my jaw as his thumb swiped across my bottom lip.
“Can I kiss you again, Emme?” he asked, the gravelly tone of his voice sending shivers through my body at the same time it warmed my soul.
I couldn’t speak so I gave him quick nods of my head.
He leaned slightly toward me, but mostly pulled me toward him. His lips captured mine and I fell into him. It was a feeling of such relief having his lips against mine that I moaned. I turned the rest of my body toward him with my feet curled up under my bottom. As soon as I turned I felt Zane’s other hand come to my waist while the one at my neck went behind my head. He fell to his back on the couch and pulled me with him. I was now on top of Zane, my mouth still connected to his, and one of my hands resting on his chest while the other wrapped around his bicep. He deepened the kiss, his velvety tongue gliding against mine. His hand at my hip traveled to my ass. The hand that had been at the back of my head moved to the same spot. I tore my mouth from his and stared into his smoldering eyes. When I said nothing, Zane squeezed my ass. Even though I was already pressed to his body, it was like I wasn’t close enough for him. I continued to stare at him. Now, Zane didn’t move. I think he was waiting for any indication from me that I was ok to keep going.
My brain was screaming at me to stop, but my body wanted more…much, much more. My heart, well, my heart would either survive or it wouldn’t because today I was determined to soak up all the happy I could get.
As I looked him in the eyes I spoke softly, “I’m sorry. I’m going to kill the moment here by talking too much.”
“It’s ok, Emme. You aren't ruining anything and if you need to stop just tell me.”
I took in a deep breath and searched his face.
“I’m not ready for all that you have to offer,” I started and pressed my hips into his a bit so he’d catch my drift. He groaned. “Which, by the way, congratulations. From what I can tell there is a lot there to offer.”
He chuckled.
I continued, “It’s just going to be friendship for me, Zane. And I’m not sure I’ll ever get to a point where I can give more than that. In fact, I’m certain that I won’t ever be able to give more than that, but I think you are one of the good ones.”
I paused a moment. Zane waited patiently while I took the time I needed.
Finally, I said, “Thank you for giving me the chance to feel some happiness this morning, this afternoon, and tonight. Even now, Zane, you have no idea what you are giving to me every time you kiss me. I don’t want to stop now, but I don’t want to mislead you either.”
“Em, we don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for. I’d never pressure you to do that. Whatever you can handle is all we do.”
I stared at him wishing things had been different, wishing that my life hadn’t been total shit for the past couple of years, and wishing that I could follow my heart.
“Tell me sweetheart, what do you want?”
My voice just a hair over a whisper, I answered, “I want you to kiss me, Zane. And I want you to touch me.”
“I need you to be clear, Emme. You want kissing and touching. Anywhere off limits?”
We could easily see each other up close, but it was dark enough that I wasn’t worried about Zane seeing my scar. Confident in that, I shook my head before I whispered, “Help me find my happy tonight.”
Zane’s eyes heated and he rolled me to my back on the deep cushions of the couch. He settled his hips in the space between my legs. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my hands went to his hair. His head came down and he kissed me good. Insanely good. One of Zane’s hands was at my waist. As he kissed me, that hand traveled slowly up my side and came to rest just beneath my breast. I wanted him to keep going, but he stopped. I moaned and I moved my hips trying to get him to do what I wanted, but his hand stayed put. I pulled my mouth from his finally and begged, “Zane, please.”
“What, Emme? What do you want?”
“Touch me, please.”
That was all the encouragement he needed because his thumb stroked from the underside of my breast, back and forth across the fabric covering my hardened nipple. It took me to another level of excitement and I was aching to find that release. Zane’s hand finally moved to cover my breast and he gently squeezed. I’m not sure how long passed before he pulled back to rest his ass on his heels. His hands went to the hem of the shirt I was wearing. I lifted myself up enough so that he could pull the shirt up over my head. Wanting to feel (and see) the skin of his chest and abdomen I sat up in front of him and my hands went to the hem of his shirt. I began to push the shirt up and Zane used one arm to reach behind his neck and pull the shirt over his head.
I took in the sight of him. He was flawless.
“Wow,” I murmured and swallowed hard.
“What is it, Em?”
I looked up at him through hooded eyes and asked, “May I touch you?”
He grinned at me and confessed, “Be pretty fucking disappointed if you didn’t, sweetheart.”
I smiled and touched my fingertips to his abdomen. It was solid muscle and even though he had just had a huge dinner followed by dessert you couldn’t tell. His abs were rippling. I trailed my fingers up his solid chest and brushed my fingertips across his nipples before gliding my hands back down. At that moment, I felt his hand at the center of my back, right at the clasp of my bra.
I looked up to him and he asked, “Ok?”
I nodded.
Zane effortlessly unclasped my bra and put both hands to my shoulders. He leaned forward and gently pushed me back so I was lying on the couch again. His fingers grasped the straps of my bra and slid them down my arms. When he pulled back to look at me I kept my arm close to my side to hide the scar just in case there was enough light for him to see it.
“Christ, Emme. You are so damn sexy,” his gravelly voice filtered through my ears.
Zane settled his hips once again between my legs. His lips came to mine for a moment to kiss me quickly before he began trailing kisses down my throat. I felt his hands at my breasts and I moaned at the feel of his strong hands on me while his solid body covered mine.
It felt safe.
It felt good.
Zane’s mouth traveled down the center right between my breasts. He used his hands to press them together next to his face as he inhaled. Then, he lifted his head just enough to one side to take a nipple into his mouth.
“Oh God,” I said, my voice ragged. It had been so long since I had felt this. It was too much.
Zane’s mouth worked one breast before moving to the other. The soles of my feet were pressed into the couch and I used them as leverage to work my hips. If I didn’t find my release soon I was certain I’d die. I’m not sure if it was his instincts or if he was just a ready for more, but Zane’s mouth traveled down my body at that moment. His hands came to the waistband of the leggings and he dug his fingers in. He looked up at me and confirmed, “Good?”
I loved that he was making sure I was ok before he did anything new. I nodded. Zane slid my leggings down my legs. He tossed them to the side and kissed his way up one leg before his face was right at my center. He inhaled my scent, growled, and wrapped his fingers around the strips of fabric at my hips. He pulled my thong down my legs and tossed it aside. His hand traveled slowly up my thigh, searching. Just before he reached the treasure he was looking for his eyes came to mine. With his eyes focused on mine, he gently pressed his fingers against my sex. My eyes fluttered closed and I took in a deep breath. I needed this. Zane didn’t move. I finally opened my eyes and looked at him. He smiled at me and pressed his thumb to my clit as he pushed one finger inside me. I moaned, loudly. Zane’s finger moved in and out of me while his thumb gave me the friction I’d been so desperately searching for moments ago. He took his other hand to my breast and bent his head to take it into his mouth. It felt glorious.
“Oh, Zane. Fuck, please don’t stop,” I moaned feeling myself coming closer and closer to the edge.
His head shot up with a grin; he looked at my face, but he gently pinched and rolled my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. His other hand was still working my sex, though he now had two fingers inside me, and I could feel it coming.
“Find it and take it, Emme. Get your happy, sweetheart.”
And that’s when I yelled out his name and found my happy.
It took me a minute or two to come down from my orgasm, but when I did I looked at Zane who was now lying beside me propped up on his elbow with his head resting in hand. Even though I wasn’t sure how it was possible I realized how hungry I still was for him.
“What is that look?” he asked.
“I don’t know. How do I look?”
“A few minutes ago, you were looking really fucking sexy. Now, still sexy, but you have a look I’ve not seen before.”
I decided to be brave. He just gave me the best kind of happy after giving it to me in different ways all day long. I figured he deserved to have a little bit of his own. I just wasn’t sure how he’d react. I swallowed hard, trying to find the courage.
“I can tell when you have something to say and you’re trying to figure out how to say it. You do what you are doing right now. Just say it, Em.”
I took in a deep breath and said, “Ok. So, the look you just saw is new because I’ve never considered doing what I’d really like to do right now.”
Zane looked down at me and the look on his face changed, but he said nothing.
“I’d like to taste you, Zane.”
I felt him go solid next to me before he said, “Emme, fuck sweetheart, I am not in any way turning that down, but you don’t have to do that. I don’t want you to feel like you need to do anything simply because I did what I just did for you. Seeing you like that was beautiful and easily its own reward.”
“I appreciate you saying that and reassuring me, but I really want to do this,” I began. I pulled my bottom lip in between my teeth for a moment to think and then said, “Please, Zane. Will you let me put my mouth on you?”
“Fuck me. I don’t think I’d ever be able to say no to you,” he admitted.
I smiled at him and pushed up on the couch. I put a hand to his shoulder and pushed him back on the couch. I maneuvered my body so that my scar was on the opposite side facing away from him. Then, I crawled down his body and settled in between his legs. I took my hands to the waistband of his jeans where I wrapped my fingers on the inside and kept my thumbs on the outside by the button. I looked up at him and could see the intensity in his face. I slowly opened the top button of the jeans before I moved to pull the zipper down. I did it agonizingly slow. My hands went back to the waistband of the jeans at his hips and I began to inch them down. He lifted to help me and then settled back again. I looked at him there on the couch in nothing but a pair of black boxer briefs and had all the proof I needed that this man was exquisite. Much like he did to me I ran my hands up his muscled thighs to the goods. I placed my hand over him and squeezed gently. He groaned. Deciding that torture wouldn’t be nice I moved to pull the boxer briefs down. Once they were gone I confirmed what I had pretty much felt to be true. This man deserved to be congratulated on what he was sporting underneath it all. I only hoped I’d be able to fit enough of him in my mouth to make it good for him.
I wrapped my hand around him and lowered my head toward his beautiful cock. With one last look up at his face I saw how much he wanted this and how much restraint he was using. Finally, I put him out of his misery when I wrapped my mouth around him and ran my tongue along the underside of his length. I heard the groans coming from the back of his throat and that only served to motivate me. Slowly, I lifted my head so that my mouth was just around the tip. I pressed a kiss there before taking him back in my mouth. Moving up and down his shaft, I changed my pace and was now moving quickly. Wanting to draw out his pleasure and make this really good for him I took him out of my mouth and moved to his balls. I licked and then sucked each one into my mouth before running my tongue up along the underside of his shaft.
“Emme,” he said, his voice the sexiest I’d ever heard it.
I pulled him into my mouth again and moaned. I would do this forever just to hear that voice. I kept my hand planted at the root of his shaft and worked him with my mouth.
Minutes later he said, “Sweetheart, you’ve got to stop.”
I froze immediately and sat up.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, thinking I had mistaken everything I had heard coming from him.
“Nothing at all, but I’m going to come if you don’t stop,” he answered quickly.
Relief swept through me and I said, “I want you to have a little happy today, too, Zane.”
I wrapped my hand around him again, took him in my mouth, and heard him groan. I picked up my pace, felt him swell inside my mouth, and took everything he gave me while he said my name in his sexy voice. When he finished, I sat up and looked at him.
He was already sitting up and coming toward me. I froze for a minute unsure of what he was doing when he got close and whispered, “You aren’t the only one who gets a taste tonight. I’m eating now.”
With that, Zane gripped my hips and pulled me toward him. My head fell back on the couch and Zane’s head disappeared between my legs. Within seconds his mouth was on me and he was eating. Even though I already admitted to myself (and Monroe) that he was good with his mouth, Zane proved that I wasn’t wrong in giving him credit where credit was due. He licked, sucked, and feasted on me. It didn’t take long before I felt the orgasm building.
“Fuck, don’t stop,” I moaned. “Zane, please.”
He didn’t relent. He kept giving. Seconds later I was coming and screaming his name.
I came down from the high and was utterly spent and useless. I rolled to my side, my scar against the couch, and buried my face in Zane’s chest.
“Wow,” I said.
He chuckled. “Tell me about it. Just found another thing to add to the list of things you do really fucking well,” he said.
I smiled against his skin and said, “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
He didn’t say anything. He just wrapped an arm around me and pulled me closer to him.
“Thank you, Zane.”
“For what, sweetheart?”
“For giving me these memories today. For making me feel good, in more ways than one. But, most of all, thank you for respecting me enough tonight to allow me to set the pace and to not push for more than I could handle.”
Zane went solid and said, “You’re welcome, Emme, but you don’t need to thank me for it. I understand your appreciation. I got something out of today, too, and I don’t just mean physically.”
“This feels nice,” I admitted, enjoying the warmth and security I felt wrapped up in his arms.
We stayed like that for a long while before he said, “Need to ask you something, Em.”
I pulled back to look at him.
“You thanked me for respecting you tonight. For respecting the limits and boundaries with regard to your body. Did someone ever not give that to you?”
I closed my eyes and exhaled. I didn’t want to get angry and ruin the day, but I’d said too much. It wasn’t his fault; it was my own. Instead of answering him I said, “Zane? Please don’t take away my happy today.”
He stayed silent a moment. Finally, he grabbed a blanket from the corner of the couch, draped it over us, pulled me closer to his body wrapping his arms tighter around me, and mumbled under his breath, “Motherfucker.”
And I knew he wasn’t referring to me when he said it. Thankfully, he respected me again and didn’t push me any further. That’s when I knew he was definitely one of the good ones. I only wished I could give him what he wanted.
I decided earlier that morning in Zane’s truck to make the day happy and to let go completely for just one day. I had done that. It was a huge step for me and I was proud of myself for it. On that thought, I forgot about the bad and settled into the good that Zane gave me.