Maci Kate
Oh, my God. Oh My God. OH, MY GOD! My breathing is a little choppy, and my heart is racing. I place my hand over my heart and rub a little, trying to get it to slow down. Damn, Reece Atwood! This man was the obsession of my teenage heart.
We grew up together, constantly in each other’s lives because our parents are best friends. They have been since I was born and he was four. I was like the nerdy little sister that followed him around like a lost puppy. He never made me feel unwanted, and always tried including me when he was around his friends. He stood up for me if his friends ever made fun of me or tried to get rid of me.
As we grew up, we stayed friends, but he became super hot—thus becoming the standard by which I judged all other boys. Nothing ever happened between us, although I wanted it to. I knew he was too old for me. We flirted harmlessly and continued to be friends, but nothing ever moved beyond that.
When he went off to college, I still crushed on him. However, he was way out of my league and never around anymore, except during holidays and a few times over the summers. Things were different when I did see him. Our once close friendship had changed to one of indifference, and it seemed he would purposely ignore me when I was around. It hurt, but I got over it. I told myself it didn’t matter, since I was going off to college soon, anyway.
He graduated college the summer I graduated high school. Our families had a barbecue to celebrate. He and I started talking, and things seemed easier than they had been in the past few years. We talked and laughed all day, so I soaked up all my courage and asked him what I had been dying to know for years.
“Reece, what happened between us?”
He looks at me, like he is confused. “Not sure what you’re talking about, Maci.”
I continue, brave now that he is talking to me again. “I don’t know. I mean, did I do something to upset you? For the past couple of years, you’ve treated me like, I don’t know, like you couldn’t care less if I was around. We used to be so close.”
He stares at me for a few beats, and then his demeanor changes, and he shut down again.
“You’re my parents’ best friends’ daughter, Maci. How did you expect me to treat you?”
Well, that wasn’t what I expected to come from him. My throat closes with tears, and it becomes painful to speak, “I—I just…We were friends, and then you…Never mind. I’m just being a silly girl.”
“You were always a silly girl, Maci. Have fun. I’ve got a date tonight.”
He wiggled his eyebrows and walked away from me, showing me that whatever we had when we were younger meant nothing to him. As my eyes filled with unshed tears, I watched him get into his old pickup truck and back out without even looking at me, taking my young heart with him.
After that, I gave up on Reece and any feelings I ever had for the asshole. He reduced me to nothing in a matter of minutes that afternoon. I knew I was something. I was someone, and even if he thought nothing of me, I knew someone would someday.
I shake my head at the memories of our past. I’m not that person anymore. I’m not that shy and reserved girl who allowed people to beat her down and treat her like shit. I’m worthy of love. And who the hell does he think he is, calling me ‘baby’ like he has a right to? I’m not looking to be treated like shit by one man, let alone two. Even if he has changed, I’m not ready to be with someone. Not after David’s crap this morning.
I walk into the kitchen, shaking my head, still confused at what all that was about. Why now?
“What’s up, Maci Kate?” Asks Reece’s mom, Anna. “You look all shook up over there in that head of yours.”
“It’s nothing, Ms. Anna. Just a weird day so far. How have you and Mr. Paul been?”
I’ve always loved Reece’s mom and dad. They have been like my aunt and uncle for so long, and they treat Bennett as if he were their own grandson. It’s fun watching them try to one-up my parents when we’re all together to see who Bennett loves more.
“Oh, you know how it is—working and playing, More playing than work, these days. We’re happy, though, so it’s good. Where’s my baby boy? I need some of that lovin’ only he can give.” I laugh, knowing exactly the kind of lovin’ she’s talking about. Bennett’s hugs and kisses are the best things ever.
“He was throwing a ball around the house, so I kicked him outside.”
I laugh, picturing him hitting Reece in the back with it. Reece deserved it, the douche.
“Actually, he hit Reece with the ball.”
Her eyes go wide with mischief. “And how did that son of mine react?”
“Oh, he laughed it off. I didn’t even realize it was him there for a minute. I haven’t seen him in years. He looks so different now.” I watch as her eyes go sad for a moment.
“Yeah, he’s different than he used to be. I guess war does that to a person. He’s getting better. He likes his job; it keeps him busy and out of trouble.”
I didn’t even think about what he has gone through; I’ve been so caught up in my life and all that’s going on there. God, what kinds of things did he see over there? How has that affected his life now? Is he okay? Does he have PTSD? Did it bother him when Bennett hit him with that ball?
“Well, he looks good.” Shit, why did I say that? My cheeks heat up with what I’m sure is a nice pink blush. “I mean, you know, healthy and all.”
Ms. Anna smiles at me, puts her arm around my shoulders and pulls me to her side. “Yeah, Maci girl, he looks healthy.” She rolls her eyes. “How have you been doing? You’re over that asshole, right?” I nod. “Good, because I’ve been thinking. It’s time for you to start getting yourself out there again. You should join one of those sites online. Like Tinder or something.”
“Tinder? Who should join Tinder?” my dad walks in and asks.
My eyes go wide. My daddy does not need to hear me talk about joining a dating site, let alone Tinder. That’s what the girls at work call ‘the hookup site.’ I disengage from Ms. Anna and clear my throat. “No one in this kitchen is joining Tinder. I do not need a hookup.”
My mom snorts from her corner of the kitchen, and I send that crazy woman a glare. She may be one of my very best friends, but she’d better not start talking about me hooking up with some random guy while my daddy is around.
“I think maybe a hook up would be good for you—loosen you up a little. Relieve some of that stress you’re always carrying around with you these days,” Mom says.
I raise my eyebrow at the woman who birthed me. “Now, you listen up, crazy lady. I’m stressed because I’m a single parent. I’m teaching America’s future hoodlums. My ex thinks we should get back together—”
Whoops, I didn’t mean to blurt that one out. Everyone in the kitchen snaps their eyes to mine. Oh shit.
I point at Momma. “This is all your fault! If you hadn’t started goading me in front of Daddy, I wouldn’t have opened my mouth,” I say, disgruntled, now that I have to spill the beans about this morning.
Daddy is looking at me like I’d better start talking. He’s never been a patient man. So, I cave and tell them everything that happened. They listen quietly until I’ve finished.
“He still has a key to your house?” Daddy asks, a little louder than necessary.
I sigh in defeat. “I took the one he had with him this morning, but I’m not sure. I told him I wanted any copies that he made, but who knows what he has.”
I stop and think for a minute. “What else does he have that I don’t know about?” My eyes fill with tears, and I stare at my daddy, the only man I can count on to hold me up when I can’t do it myself. He pulls me in for a hug and squeezes me tight.
“The fucker better not have any more,” he says as he rubs my back.
“Any more what?” I hear Mr. Paul ask.
I pull away from Daddy and see Mr. Paul and Reece standing in the now crowded kitchen. I quickly wipe my eyes, not wanting Reece to see me like this. I dare a glance at him, and he looks murderous as he listens to my father relay what happened this morning.
“You think he would do something, Maci?” Reece asks. I’m surprised, but a little touched, that he’s acting like he cares. It’s probably his instincts kicking in from his job.
I bite my lip and shrug my shoulder. “He’s been more intense than usual. I have no clue what’s going on with him, but he’s definitely been acting strange. He even has it in his head that we should get back together.”
“Yeah, that isn’t fucking happening” he mutters under his breath, but everyone hears. “He shouldn’t have keys to your house. That’s an invasion of privacy. Keep an eye out and see if you notice things missing or out of place. Call me immediately if you do, Maci.”
I eye him, appreciative that he cares that I’m safe. But also, I’m pissed. Like, who. The. Fuck?
“I’ve got this, you guys. He’s not going to do anything.”
“Maci. I’m not fucking playing around here. You better tell me if anything happens,” Reece warns.
I lose it. Walking up to him, I push my finger into his chest. His hard chest. Damn.
“I’d better tell you? Who the fuck do you think you are? I haven’t talked to you in years, Reece. Years!”
I poke him again and he snarls at me.
“The last time you talked to me, you basically told me that I was nothing to you and never was.” Poke. “Then, you left me there feeling about an inch tall,” I say, shoving my thumb and pointer finger an inch apart in his face. “So, excuse me if I don’t listen when you command me to do what you say. I can handle MY shit—HAVE been handling MY shit—for a long time now. I will continue to handle MY shit in the future. I don’t need anyone to swoop in and save the day, when I can, in fact, do it my own damn self!”
Reece’s mouth hangs open in shock. Fire burns behind his eyes and I know he’s pissed. He also doesn’t have a leg to stand on in this argument. He did treat me like shit the last time we talked.
Looking away from him, I stare at everyone surrounding me in the kitchen. Our parents look at me with shock and pride. Zoning in on them, I decide it’s time to leave.
“Bye, Momma and Daddy. It’s time for me and Bennett to skedaddle. See you all later,” I throw over my shoulder with a wave and go to find my son.
I collect Bennett from outside where he is throwing the ball with some of my parents’ friends.
“Okay, buddy. We gotta get going.”
“Ah Mom, the game isn’t over. I don’t wanna go yet.”
I ruffle his hair, and I crouch down in front of him. “I know, buddy, but we can finish the game at home. I’m tired, okay?”
“Okay, Momma. I love you.” My strong little boy knows when I’ve reached my limit. I hug him to my side.
“I love you too, Boo Bear.”
When we get home, Bennet finishes watching the game and plays in the living room. I put in a load of laundry, then fold the clothes that have been in the dryer for a few days now. After I’ve fed, bathed, and tucked my son in for the night, I curl up on the couch with my iPad. I bring up my Kindle app and begin reading where I left off this morning. After about an hour, I start to get sleepy and decide to head to bed. I promise myself that I will be more motivated tomorrow and will finish all my laundry. I might even get some cleaning done. Proud of myself for my adulting plans, I check the house to make sure I’m all locked up.
As I’m about to plug my phone in to charge for the night, I notice that someone messaged me while I was getting ready for bed.
Old Friend: I’m sorry, Maci Kate.
Old Friend: I shouldn’t have talked to you like that.
I guess this is Reece. Should I respond? I’m not mad anymore. Slightly irritated, and confused, but not mad. If I’m honest, I’m curious about this beautiful man.
Maci Kate: No, you shouldn’t have.
Maci Kate: Old friend, huh?
Old Friend: We used to be friends, Maci.
Maci Kate: I thought I was just the daughter of your parents’ friends…
Old Friend: I was so fucking stupid to say that.
Yeah, you were, jerk! At least he realizes it now, though.
Old Friend: It was a lie, all of it, what I said that day.
Maci Kate: Why say it then?
He doesn’t answer for a few minutes, and that pisses me off. I’m too tired for his bullshit.
Maci Kate: Never mind. It doesn’t matter now anyway. Goodnight.
I put my phone on the nightstand and turn my light off. I pull my covers up to cocoon myself in, and I hear my phone’s message tone. I debate whether to check my phone, but I’m too curious to leave it be.
Old Friend: Of course it matters. I didn’t know what to say to you. Maci, I was leaving for boot camp in a few days.
Maci Kate: So what Reece? You had to be a jerk because you were leaving?
Old Friend: It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Maci Kate: Really, that’s your answer?
Old Friend: Ask me again.
Maci Kate: Ask you what?
Old Friend: Ask me what happened between us.
Maci Kate: You remember what I said?
Old Friend: I remember it all.
Old Friend: Because it killed me to lie to you. It still kills me.
Maci Kate: What happened between us, Reece?
I watch the dot, dot, dots at the bottom of the screen, waiting for a reply that doesn’t come. Tossing my phone on the bed beside me, I fling my head back against my pillow, pull the other pillow over my face and scream. What the hell am I doing? I pull the pillow off my face knowing I need to get back to reality. I have no business giving into an old fantasy.
Seconds after I close my eyes, James Arthur begins singing “Say You Won’t Let Go.” He wouldn’t be calling me this late, would he? Opening my eyes, I glance at the screen and see that it’s Reece. Fuck. Can I handle whatever he’s going to say? I laid my bruised heart to rest years ago, do I really want to dig it up where there’s a chance it could get damaged again?
“Hello.” I answer.
“When I left for school, I realized I was falling for you. I knew you were too young for me, and that I was going away to school, so we would never see each other. When I was at school, I missed you so damn much, but I knew I couldn’t have you, and it pissed me off. I dated girls, but they never compared to you, which pissed me off too. When I saw you that day, it was so good to be able to talk to you and laugh with you like we used to. I was done with school, and you were finally old enough, but I was leaving for the Marines. What was the point in starting anything with you? I figured it would be best to just push you away instead of giving you hope for a relationship that wouldn’t be able to start. Who knew when I would be home again? Who knew if I’d be home again?
“I regretted it as I drove away, but I thought it was the best I could give you. I never had a date that night. I thought about you all the time while I was gone. I wrote you hundreds of letters that ended up in the trash. I figured what I wanted to say would be best said in person. When I finally came back, I was determined to make it right, but you were married. I missed my chance with you.”
“You hurt me that day. Made me feel smaller than small.”
“I’m so sorry, baby.”
Every time he calls me ‘baby,’ I feel it down deep in my core. He is so fucking sexy. I bet he’s got some damn fine muscles under his tight t-shirts. I would lick those muscles, every single one. Shiiit.
“You there, baby?”
“You shouldn’t call me that.”
“What?”
“Baby.”
“And why is that?”
Fuck it, why not? He’s hot, and I haven’t wanted anyone in a long ass time. He’s also the guy who broke my teenage heart. Screw that noise, he told me why he said that stuff, not that I’ve decided to forgive him for it, but it makes sense.
“It makes me feel things.”
“What kinds of things, baby?”
“Makes me want things I shouldn’t.”
“You definitely should want those things.”
Frustrated, I let out a sigh. “What are we doing here, Reece?”
“We are doing what we should have done eight years ago. Baby, I want you, all of you. Those feelings never went away for me. Not sure how you’re feeling, but I’m hoping it’s at least a little bit of what I am.”
“And if I am?”
“You were so sexy today, baby. I didn’t like those jeans, though. Please don’t wear them again.”
“Why? I love those jeans.”
“I don’t like the idea of men seeing what’s meant to be mine.”
“Yours?”
“Oh, you’re mine, baby. I’m just giving you time to come around to that.”
This is just too much. It’s been a weird day, and I’m too tired to be having this conversation.
“I’m going to sleep.”
He laughs. Damn, is everything this man does sexy? “Night, baby. Call me in the morning.” I hang up. I can’t believe I told him all of that.