“Bailey, shut the hell up. You don’t have all the information.” He is arguing with her, but I take this moment to sprint back towards the condo. This is the second time I’ve been accused of being a whore. Bailey may not have stated those exact words, but they were implied. I’m just fucking up friendships left and right. I can’t face Jordan right now. Instead of heading back to our unit, I head towards the pool. The gates are locked so I take a seat on the ground and lean against them. I let the tears fall freely now for the chaos that is my life. All facets of my life can never line the hell up. As soon as one aspect is going well, something else plunges me pack into misery.
I smell his expensive cologne without looking up. “Get up baby. You’re going to get sick out here.” I look up at him and he grimaces at my tear-stained face. He pulls me up and kisses my eyelids. “Our road won’t be an easy one sweetheart, especially because of the way we started, but you’re worth it for me. Bailey was out of line. I’ll talk to her once she gets over the initial shock and calms down. For now, I had Stanley take her home. Now come on, let’s get you inside.” He takes his suit jacket off and wraps it around me. I’m hurting so I smart off, “Yeah, let’s get your dirty little secret inside before someone sees you.”
He steps closer to me until my back is against the gate. “Don’t you dare fucking do that. You already know how I feel about you. Don’t ever let someone else’s words or misconceptions make you doubt the love I have for you. I’m not good at expressing my feelings so I need you to believe in us.” He grabs my hand and starts pulling me along. “I’m taking your ass inside. I need to fuck you into a good mood again. You need my attitude adjuster.”
“Your attitude adjuster?” I struggle to keep pace with his brisk walking.
“My cock love. It’s your personal attitude adjuster,” he smirks.
“Oh. My. God. You are so crass. Your cock is not a fix all smart ass.” I can’t help but smile. His serious intent on making me feel better with his penis is so out there, it’s funny. He has a way of making everything fade in the background except me and him. I can’t stay upset around him. He won’t let me. His cocky ways are endearing and infectious.
“So you say babe, but the mere mention of my cock, and those tears are gone.” He winks at me and I slap his arm. Crap, he’s right. “You’re even smiling. In a few minutes you’ll be screaming out in pleasure. If that is not an attitude adjuster, I don’t know what is.”
We enter the condo laughing, but Jordan is in the living room pacing. “Shiv, are you okay? Bailey called me upset. She shared with me the lashing she gave you.” Grayson pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. He doesn’t want me to slide back into my somber mood.
“Let’s talk later, okay?” I give her a hug to reassure her that I’m okay. For now.
“Thank fuck,” Grayson exclaims.
The minute we enter my room I’m surprised by Grayson’s actions. He takes out his phone and scroll through it for a few seconds before placing it on my iHome docking station on my nightstand. Lifehouse’s “Everything” begins to play from the speakers and I’m so moved. I can’t help the tears that fall, but these are happy tears. He knows how much music means to me. He said he has a difficult time expressing himself so he is using the music as a form of expression. He saunters over to where I’m still standing by the door.
“Listen to the lyrics baby. They convey my love for you so perfectly.” He uses his thumb to wipe away my tears before placing a chaste kiss to my lips. He eases me down to the chair I have in the corner and places my feet on the ottoman. “Sit here. I’m going to run us a bath. Have you eaten?” I simply nod because I’m still in shock at his tender side. Satisfied with my answer, he walks to my bathroom and closes the door. I can hear the bath water running. What had escalated to a shitty day is now looking up. Grayson doesn’t see that the attitude adjuster is him. His cock is just an added bonus. I’m so irrevocably in love with this man. He has managed to not just alter my mood, but my perception and receptiveness to love as well. I’m now willing to let go and let love in.
I’m pulled out of my reverie by the sound of the bathroom door opening. Grayson strides past me and out of my room. He briefly converses with Jordan before returning to the room with two wine glasses and a bottle of pinot grigio. He doesn’t say a word to me, he just grabs the iHome and takes it all to the bathroom. I don’t have to wait long, he is at my side in seconds pulling me up. “Come love.” Wow. The lavender aroma permeating from the bath is heavenly. Little tea lights are placed along the tub and help to create a romantic ambiance. He shuffles through the music on his phone until he finds the playlist he’s looking for. Joi’s Lick starts to play and I giggle. So gone is the lovey-dovey music. He has replaced it with music that conveys he wants to fuck. I gather that my assessment is correct from the sudden wickedness in his eyes. He slowly unbuttons his dress shirt and I’m spellbound. His chest and abs are a picture of perfection. Every etched line screams to be licked. He sees the lust in my eyes and begins to remove his pants just as slowly. The massive bulge in front of his boxer briefs is unmistakable.
He walks over to me and lifts my tank over my head before licking the swells of my breasts pushed up by my demi-cup bra. “I love these,” he murmurs. He unsnaps the front clasp and my double D breasts falls heavily against my chest.
He cups them in his palms and massages them. “I want my dick right here,” he smiles. He yanks off my sweats and panties as one. His eyes peruse my body, yet I’m surprisingly at ease with my nudity. “Damn, your body is so amazing love.” He spins me around and grabs my ass. “This ass is my favorite.” I can tell that he has removed his briefs because his naked erection is nudging my ass. He tilts my head to the side so that he can place tender kisses along my neck. One hand splays across my stomach while the other hand fists my hair. A small moan slips past my lips as I melt into him.
“Hmmm, I think you like it a little rough. I like the way your body responds to the hair pulling. I plan to find out what else your body likes.” He gives my hair a slight tug to test his theory and I nearly come undone. I grind my ass against his erection, desperate to soothe this ache he is causing between my legs.
“Please Grayson.” My voice cracks as I struggle to maintain control. He smiles knowingly and guides me to the tub.
“Patience love.” He gets into the bath first before assisting me to take a seat between his legs. “Let me take care of you.” He pours us a glass of wine before leaning us back against the tub. His hand in my hair is gentle now as he massages my scalp.
We listen to slow romantic music by various artists and continue to finish off the entire bottle of wine. I’m relaxed and horny as hell. The wine has heightened my libido and is driving my boldness. I want this sex god now. No more swooning. I turn to face him and inch forward until I’m straddling his thighs. I rub myself against his hardness while I capture his lips in a searing kiss. He is caught off guard by my forwardness for a second, but then he returns my enthusiasm. His tongue duels mine in a punishing kiss. In my continuance of taking the lead, I grab his cock and place it at my entrance. I slide down, taking each delicious inch until I’ve taken all of him. “Grayson,” I moan.
“That’s right baby. Take what you want from me.” He grips my hips and I begin to move. His girth stretches me wide as my slow grind already threatens to push me over the edge. I can feel Grayson’s corded thigh muscles tighten beneath me as we begin to pick up the tempo. And just like that, my lead is taken away. He sets an Olympic pace as he impales me on his cock faster and so much harder. Gone is the tenderness. The man in front of me is raw and unapologetic with his fucking. “Damn, your pussy is so good baby. Fuck, I can’t get deep enough.” He angles his hips and I damn near feel his length in my stomach. Water sloshes over the side of the tub as the rhythm picks up even more.
I’m sure Jordan is getting our sexcapade in surround sound, but I can’t bring myself to care. Grayson yanks my hair back, exposing my neck to him. His teeth sink into my skin and it is enough to send us both over the edge. I scream out his name, extending the syllables as I ride out my orgasm.
“Damn, I love how vocal you’ve become love. I bet the neighbors know my name with that pronouncement. So fucking hot!” I flush crimson. I may as well have given Jordan front row tickets to the show. I cover my face, but Grayson is not having it. “Don’t be ashamed of your sexuality. Own it. Embrace it.” His erection rises above the water line between us and I smile. Seems like I’m not the only insatiable one.
“Well that was fast,” I say looking down at his cock.
“It’s you sweetheart. I just can’t get enough. Come on, let’s get out. I want you in the bed.” When we get into the bedroom, Grayson picks me up and throws me on the bed. Sexual deviance stares back at me as he stealthily climbs into the bed. He grabs me by the ankles and pulls me the rest of the way to him. My body hums from his dominance. He wraps my legs around his waist and I tingle with anticipation. He leans down and kiss me ever so gently, but I don’t want gentle. I want to scream. Take me damn it.
His right hand slides down to the base of my neck and a small gasp slips past my lips. My back arches on its own accord as I grip the sheets. Grayson smiles wickedly as he tightens his grip. He watches closely for my reaction so I can’t hide my desire to have him squeeze tighter. Moisture pools between my legs and I begin to claw at his arms. I need more. This is a side of me that I’m not familiar with. He loosens his hold and I can’t help the disappointment that ensues. “Interesting,” he says. He plunges his shaft in me and I grip his ass so that he’ll go deeper. He wanted me sexually uninhibited, well here I am.
“Please don’t stop,” I beg.
“Not a chance love.” His hands find my throat again and I begin to tremble with need.
“Please Grayson. Do it.” I don’t have to explain what ‘it’ is.
“I need you to tap my arms if it gets to be too much baby.” I nod my understanding, but this is unsatisfactory. “No. I need you to verbalize that you understand,” he insists.
“I understand. I will tap your arms if your hold is too much,” I assure. The predatory gleam in his eyes is back as his smile broadens. His grip tightens on my neck as he fucks me with fervor. He alternates the intensity of his hold around my neck with each stroke. The feeling is intense.
The initial sensation of oxygen loss brings about an uncertainty. Before I can panic though, Grayson slightly releases his hold again and holy hell. Stars begin to dance behind my closed eyes as the feeling of falling takes over. He continues this erotic strangulation sequence as he pounds me into oblivion. I can feel the build-up and I’ve never felt this orgasmic. I’m completely euphoric when my orgasm ripples through me. Grayson finds his own release and we ride out the waves together. I don’t know what the fuck that was and the aftermath scares me. I can’t believe I asked him to choke me. Who is this person I’m becoming? I’m so ashamed. When he pulls out, I turn on my side to face away from him.
“That was fucking earth shattering love.” He forces me to turn to face him. “Don’t hide from me. You’re discovering your sexuality, that’s all. You’re learning what turns you on. If you enjoy breath play, that’s okay. I’ll make sure you’re safe.”
“What the hell is breath play? How can I like something if I don’t know what it is?”
“Breath play is what we were doing. It is also called erotic asphyxiation. Basically a fancy term for purposefully withholding oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal. It can be quite dangerous if not practiced right. You naturally gravitated toward this type of play from the mere touch of my hands to your neck and that’s perfectly okay.” He strokes away the hair that is drenched in sweat and sticking to my face.
“Ha. You didn’t say perfectly normal. You think I’m nuts. Who the hell in their right mind asks to be choked?” I went from being sexually inexperienced to sexually dark in the blink of a relationship.
“To hell with normal babe. We’re creating our own normal and that is all that matters. I love that you trust me enough to allow yourself to be sexually free. I won’t let you fall. Ever.” His promise to protect me warms my heart while simultaneously frightening me that he has experience with such an act.
“Grayson? How is it that you’re so comfortable with breath play?” The smile drops from his face in an instant. He momentarily looks away before facing me again. He studies my reaction as he carefully chooses his words.
“Siobhan, my sexual history is extensive—some I’m not proud off. I’ve experimented with the many facets of sex and have very distinguished taste. My sexual appetite is pronounced and my stamina can be intimidating. This is my past and part of our future. My past sexual encounters have no bearing on our relationship as I’m clean and always tested regularly. I do want to introduce you to my predilection of sex, but I will take it slow. You’re on your own journey right now.” His admittance of his extensive sexual history slightly disturbs me, but it is just that— history. This fact doesn’t stop me from digging deeper though.
“Is this why you’re considered a sex addict by your therapist?” He sits up and pulls me into his lap.