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Gentlemen and Brides: Regency Romance Collection by Joyce Alec (80)

7

“M’lady, will you be getting out of bed?” questioned Lizzie’s maid.

Lizzie stared at the ceiling. She had barely slept for the past four days and couldn’t remember the last time she ate. All the secrets she had tried to hide away had come spiraling back. She had always known her past could never be kept a secret. She could not run away anymore. What was the point? The future was bleak and she was sure she’d live out her life as a disgraced spinster.

“Lord Malmesbury called again yesterday, m’lady. He seemed quite upset.”

“I see,” answered Lizzie, in a daze. She wasn’t listening to what the maid was saying, but it seemed she was waiting for a response.

Loud noises and arguing coming from downstairs startled Lizzie. The maid rushed out of the room to check on the commotion. Within moments, Lizzie heard loud shouting coming her way. Struggling to sit up, she was astonished when a familiar, burly looking man threw her door open.

Her voice a croak, she mumbled, “Papa.”

Her father took in her wane complexion, dead eyes, and the bags under them and he moved towards her, pulling her into a hug. Holding her close, he spoke in her hair, “My darling, are you all right? Why are you in such a state?”

She tried to speak but the familiar warmth which surrounded her, broke her out of her shock, and then the tears would not stop. As she sobbed and let herself break in the safety of her father’s arms, the maid moved about the room, pushing apart the curtains and opening the windows to let in some light before heading out to the kitchen.

Now that her father had arrived, Lizzie found the strength to eat. Her father demanded food be brought up immediately. Listening to Lizzie’s account of Lady Malmesbury’s accusations, the duke continued to stroke his daughter’s hair and reassure her that the world was not all evil. Father and daughter prayed together, which brought Lizzie peace.

Outside, Matthew frowned at the presence of another carriage. After calling on Lizzie for many days, he was determined to see her. Hearing sounds, he moved towards the gardens and then he heard the raw, unrestrained sobbing which was undoubtedly Lady Elizabeth’s. He was about to rush inside, when he heard another voice, a male voice which was soothing.

Matthew rang the bell and the butler appeared.

“My lord, Lady Elizabeth is unwell and is unavailable today.”

Clenching his teeth, Matthew wouldn’t be refused one more time. “She is inside and I will see her. Tell Lady Elizabeth that I will not leave until I have seen her.”

He pushed past the butler, walked towards the drawing room and paced, angrily. Nothing was making sense. He had learned the disgraceful woman who had married his cousin had been none other than Lady Elizabeth. Matthew couldn’t accept his mother’s side of the story. He just had to know what transpired. He didn’t care. He knew Lizzie was holding a dark secret and was sure of her innocence.

As Matthew waited in the drawing room, he heard a murmur of voices followed by a male voice shouting. Matthew stood up ready to fight when the Duke of Wellington walked in, his face red with anger.

“What is the meaning of this, Lord Malmesbury? My daughter is unwell. She will not be pandering out of bed just to see what you want.”

“Your Grace, I did not mean to intrude.”

The duke ignored his words. “Are you the reason she is in this state? You had better not be.”

“Papa!” Dressed haphazard, Elizabeth’s appearance rocked Matthew to the core. She looked terrible.

“Lady Elizabeth,” stammered Matthew, “I couldn’t bear the thought of you being here alone. I did not realize you were being cared for by your father. I will see myself out. I do apologize.”

She was gripping the doorway for support, and she had no pallor. Her legs were trembling and her eyes looked haunted, “I – I apologize for my father’s outburst, but it is best that you leave. Please understand we will not be able to see each other again. Although it pains my heart, this must be our final farewell.”

The duke glared at Matthew as he wrapped his arms around his daughter, giving her the strength to stand. “Thank you for your concern, Lord Malmesbury. I will see that she is well cared for.”

Matthew stared at their retreating backs. The maid stood there quietly, waiting to see him out.

“Is she sick?” he asked, not quite expecting an answer.

The maid shook her head. “Ever since she returned from your estate, she has been like this. We do not know what is wrong with her. She has refused to see a doctor.”

Matthew could see the maid was not going to reveal anything else and he could see the accusation in her eyes. The woman blamed him for the health of her mistress.

Matthew left.

* * *

It was a few days before he received a letter from Lady Elizabeth, asking to see him. He was shocked and pleasantly surprised, especially since she had wished him a final farewell.

When he arrived, she was resting on a chair, reading a book. She looked better, albeit tired.

“How are you feeling?” asked Matthew as he took a seat next to her.

She smiled, but there was no life in that smile. “I am better.”

Matthew waited patiently. This was her opportunity to say anything she wished and he did not wish to rush her.

She was quiet for a few moments before saying, “You asked me for a reason why we can never be together. Let me give you one now. I am leaving for America in one month and I will not be returning.”

Her face was calm, and as he looked at her, Matthew realized he could not let this happen. “Leaving? Why? Your whole life is here.”

“Events have transpired that you could never hope to understand. At this time, I need to start fresh. My Uncle James will be joining me as a chaperone.”

He paced the room, restless. “Did I do something?”

“This has nothing to do with you.”

Matthew clenched his fist and then beseeched her. “Won’t you marry me, Elizabeth? I don’t know how, but in this short period I’ve known you, you have not left my thoughts for a moment and I seem to be desperately in love with you.”

She seemed to have expected that from her calm expression. “Love doesn’t solve every problem, Lord Malmesbury, and as much as I appreciate your sentiments, I cannot marry you. My future is decided.”

He moved forward, kneeling by her. “By whom? Your father? Your mother? All of whom are so focused on keeping me out of your life?”

“There is not one in my family who despises you. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. My father was quite impressed with your concern for me. It is complicated and I cannot tell you more than that.”

“Do you make light of my feelings?” Matthew said bitterly, taking a step back.

Lizzie looked horrified. “Of course not! You have been nothing less than wonderful,” she gasped as the tears welled up in her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. She refused to speak because any move would guarantee she would not be able to hold back her emotions.

He gently raised her hands to his lips. She was so frail and he knew she had been through something terrible. He didn’t care. He would accept any past indiscretions and welcome her into his home and his heart.

He pleaded, “I want to provide you with the happiest life within my power. I want to shower you with love so that there is never a day that you question your worth.”

For the first time Matthew got his wish. He saw Lady Elizabeth lose control. The tears fell as her eyes shimmered like emeralds. Her composed demeanor dissipated as she lashed out with anger. “I am damaged and the source of gossip. I was married. Your cousin’s actions, along with his twisted tale of our marriage, have taken away every chance of happiness I had hoped for. Although it has been kept a secret, your cousin will continue to spread his web of lies and I cannot defend myself from the gossip. I will not bring that shame upon you or your family.”

Lizzie was trembling with such force that Matthew was sure she would shatter. “My dear, Elizabeth, tell me what happened. I will defend you. Together, we can find the happiness that we both crave.”

Lizzie stood. “Matthew, I saw the look in your mother’s eyes when I tried to defend myself. Your mother didn’t know I was the woman who married your cousin, but her complete disgust was quite apparent,” cried Lizzie.

Up until that moment, she had only shared her experience with her parents and God. She couldn’t stop talking. “At a ball, Lord Livingston invited me on a walk. I knew that I shouldn’t, but we managed to sneak away without anybody noticing.” Lizzie choked, “Henry forced me into the stables. I begged and begged and he didn’t stop. He threatened my reputation and the reputation of my family unless I agreed to marry him.”

“Oh, Elizabeth,” cooed Matthew as helped her back to the chair as her legs were not supporting her. “That is too much for anyone to bear. You did nothing wrong.”

“It took me a long time to realize that,” said Lizzie, started to gain back her composure. “When I married him, I insisted that it be a small, private ceremony. I wouldn’t even let my parents announce the wedding. It was too devastating. My mother sensed something was wrong and I told her the whole story before Lord Livingston and I left for our honeymoon. When my father was informed of Henry’s actions, he wanted to kill him, but refrained.” Lizzie continued, “Because of my wishes, my father had the marriage records destroyed, but did not pursue legal action against Lord Livingston. I didn’t want to risk people hearing about this. I was embarrassed and broken.”

Matthew spoke, “Well, then it’s as if the marriage never happened. Why did you feel love was so out of reach?”

Lizzie looked up with love in her eyes. “I knew that I would never be able to keep such a horrible secret from my husband. I just couldn’t live with the guilt, so I decided that love was never a realistic option.”

Matthew stayed silent as he allowed Lizzie all the space she needed to tell her story. “Healing was a process, and to be honest, I am not sure I feel completely healed. My faith in God and my parents’ support are what keep me going.” As a final thought, she added, “I did not take a penny from that horrible man. Also, he has accused me of being a social climber, even though my father is a duke. His biggest concern was my large dowry, because it would help with his failing estate.”

Matthew felt it was time to speak. “Do you think so little of me? That because you have been married, that will impact my feelings for you?! I love you. I don’t care what gossip comes about because of this. We will stand up to all accusations together. And as for Henry, we will make him pay.”

Once again, Lizzie began to cry. How could this perfectly wonderful man be saying all the right things?

“Darling Elizabeth, if you could only see yourself from my eyes. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Your strength, courage, and faith are to be admired, not to be looked down upon. Please, do not go to America. Marry me and start a beautiful, new life.”

Lizzie began to protest, “I don’t – I want to – but—”

“Just say, yes, Elizabeth.”

Those green eyes looked up at him and he saw the tiny flare of hope in them.

“I hold grudges,” warned Elizabeth with a smile.

“I will tease you so much that you will be forced to let go of your anger.”

“I don’t like attending balls,” said Elizabeth.

“Excellent. I despise them.” Matthew laughed.

“I dislike tomatoes.”

“Even better. More for me.”

Matthew pulled her up and kissed her till she was gasping for breath. “When can we get married?”

Lizzie smiled in acceptance, and for the first time, saw a new, bright future ahead.

* * *

THE END