Claire

After a few days of trudging through the city, shuttling Smitty down the elevator early in the morning and late at night to do his thing, I welcomed the sun and salt air of Smith Point, a small stretch of untouched beach on Fire Island.

We could also take the car, which was a must, according to Aiken.

His truck and his shitkickers were deal breakers. They either came with, or he didn’t go anywhere—his words, not mine.

“You going to miss all those hip dinners and expensive cocktails?” Aiken teased, his eyes sparkling, almost as blue as the water we’d driven past.

The windows down, my hair blowing along with Smitty’s ears, I wanted to freeze the moment.

Us laughing. Putting down our own roots.

“Not one bit. Not that they weren’t good, but too much of it in all one place. Way too much food and way, way too many people. I’m ready for some space.”

“Exactly. Glad I discovered this place.”

Aiken had found it when looking for a place with a decent dog park. Along with being quiet and low-key, Smith Point had a brand-new two-mile area set up for dogs.

If I thought Aiken was a bumbling romantic when he saw the dude proposing in Central Park, it didn’t even come close to when he unlocked the door to the rental he’d found. Water views off the second- and third-floor balconies, a gourmet kitchen, fireplace in front of the couch—it was a beachgoer’s fantasy.

He’d found the rental on Airbnb when someone had backed out of a reservation, and we certainly had lucked out. Pet-friendly, with a private swimming pool, hot tub, and a fire pit, it was simply paradise.

“Here you go, my lady.”

“Oh boy, please don’t tell me I’m going to be stuck on this island with the corny version of Aiken.”

“Come on, Smitty,” he called to my dog, letting him off his leash. With only a whistle, Smitty followed him into the yard. Picking up a Frisbee, Aiken tossed it into the pool. Smitty chased after it, and there went my dog, flying through the air, smacking into the water.

“Well, well, look at this.” Aiken propped his elbow on a hot tub for two. He flicked a switch, and the jets whirred to life. “Whaddya say? Let’s get naked and get in.”

“Um, we just dropped our bags by the door and Smitty’s all wet and what if someone sees and...”

Aiken paid no mind to my rambling. He’d already dropped his cargo shorts and was kicking out of his shitkickers (which, yes, he’d worn) and tugging his shirt over his head. Then he was in a pair of boxer briefs, the sun reflecting off his golden skin, his hair too long and curling around his ears. “Have you noticed the privacy shrubs? And Smitty looks mighty happy lying down in the sun.”

He did. His fur slick, tongue out, eyes never leaving us.

Off went Aiken’s boxer briefs, and in the water, he went, staring me down until I stripped and settled next to him. He pulled me into the crook of his arm, and I laid my head on his shoulder, my breasts grazing the top of the water.

“Sublime,” he mumbled, tilting his head toward the sun. There was a slight breeze, the trees around us rustling, making the temperature of the hot tub perfect.

“Sun feels good,” I admitted hazily.

“And this feels good on my tired feet. Christ, did we walk or what? That city’s too big for me.”

“Feels good, definitely.”

I closed my eyes and breathed it all in.

Aiken’s fingers were on my chin, and his lips hovered over mine as he directed my face toward his. Then they were on me.

Slow.

Luxurious.

He took his time, caressing my lips, biting at my lower one, gaining entrance, his tongue swiping against mine.

I moved to straddle his lap, my thighs on either side of his, my breasts touching his chest. Wet skin against wet skin. His hardness found my soft spot, and we moved together, creating friction, more heat than already was in the hot tub, and then he was sliding in…

In me, without protection. I knew it. I didn’t care. I tossed my head back and moaned. It was loud and the furthest thing from ladylike as he drove into me. I gave him everything back in earnest, sinking down as he pushed up. Time stood still until we were both close, and then everything sped up. Our pace, our breathing, our race to the finish.

Slumped over Aiken’s shoulder, placing chaste kisses on his shoulder blade, I heard him whisper in my ear, “This is it for me, Claire. You’re it. You’re everything.”

A deserving response eluded me. Instead, I let my silent acceptance of the gravity of his words speak for themselves.

Yet, he was everything I’d never imagined.

Later, in front of a roaring fire, glass of wine in my hand, my belly full of fresh fish and roasted vegetables Aiken had bought at the market, I leaned back into his chest. I was sitting between his legs, both of us on the floor, his back to the sofa, Smitty at our feet.

Aiken pulled my hair to the side and kissed the side of my neck, and goose bumps prickled my skin.

I was dressed in nothing more than an extra-large T-shirt of Aiken’s and lace panties. No bra, no pants, no makeup, no perfume. Nothing. Just me.

“Really like the shower here,” he said, reminding me of our predinner activities. “I can’t do what I did to you here when we get back home. Not enough room. And the two shower heads…”

“Hmm.” I continued to nuzzle deep into his chest, my eyes at half-mast as he assaulted my neck with feather kisses.

“We should put one in your house.”

“I haven’t done one thing to the house in years,” I mumbled.

“You should. Make it more about you.”

“I never wanted to change things, not since…”

“I figured, but maybe it’s time. Time for Claire.”

I wanted to argue with him, but he placed a long kiss below my ear, and chills ran up my spine. It felt too damn good and distracted me from the pain pumping through my veins.

“Maybe I’ll put one in my house, and you can use it anytime you want. Maybe one day, you’ll even think about moving in? With me? Starting over?”

This knocked me out of my haze. Sitting up faster than warranted, I shifted onto my knees and turned to face Aiken. “No, I can’t do that. Don’t ask me to do that. Start over or anything. Move in with you…” My words were fragments, shattered like my heart.

His hands up in front of him, he said, “Okay, okay. Calm down. I was being playful. I won’t say anything more. I was caught up in the moment. I thought it was appropriate.”

“Well, it’s not. It’s not ever going to be. I’m not leaving the house where Abby lived.”

I saw red. My mind felt as if it had snapped in half.

Why was I so prickly over changing things?

I stood up and snapped my fingers for Smitty to come with me. Snagging the leash by the door, I was fuming.

“I’m sorry. Really.” He stood to face me, the fire sputtering out behind him. “I thought we were in a different place, but maybe it’s just me. I just don’t want you to stay stuck forever.”

“I don’t care if I’m stuck. That’s me. That’s my life. I never hid that from you. Never.” I held Smitty’s leash taut at my side. He sat like the faithful soldier he once was. My dog.

“Abby’s room is still…”

“Don’t say it, Aiken. I know her room, and I like it the way it is. I don’t need you to point any of this out to me. That’s my place. Not yours.”

I flung open the door.

“Where are you going? It’s dark…let me come with.”

“Aiken, I’m a grown-ass woman. I’ve lived on my own for over a decade. I’m taking a walk with my dog to cool down, and I don’t need you to come.”

“Do you have your phone?”

“Christ, with the phone. I’ll be fine.” I walked out the door.

Aiken wanted me to move on, and I wasn’t sure I could do that—ever.

Abby wasn’t coming back. But I’d never believed I could be happy…after she was gone.