Chapter 47

Naomi walked to Dean Morgan’s office slowly, trying to keep her body from quaking with anxiety. This was it. The day she’d find out if she won the award. The day she would either vanquish her enemy or be vanquished by him.

The thought of Sebastian as her enemy made her heart ping painfully in her chest, but it wasn’t the time to focus on that. She had to infuse resolve and animosity into her veins if she was going to make it through the meeting.

The bitterly frigid air made her breath appear in puffs with every exhale. She began breathing out more forcefully, as if every large cloud that appeared before her face were proof of her strength. It was moronic, but it made her feel powerful and that’s what she needed in the moment, so fuck it. Breathe away, Naomi.

She arrived at the door to the building that housed the Faculty Affairs offices and slipped inside. The heavy wooden doors shut firmly behind her, leaving her feeling isolated from the outside world as she stood in the dimly lit corridor. It would be the perfect setting for a horror movie, and Naomi prayed the meeting wouldn’t actually turn into one for her. Forcing herself to put one foot in front of the other, she made her way to the dean’s office. As she turned a corner, her eyes immediately locked on Sebastian sitting on the pew. His forearms were resting on his thighs as he rubbed his hands together. He hadn’t seen her, and Naomi was grateful because she couldn’t seem to stop staring at him. There were so many feelings, both good and bad, that she couldn’t parse them. It was as if they all melded together to form one intense sensation that made her want to smile and sob at the same time.

“Good morning, Dr. Price. I’ll let Dean Morgan know you’ve arrived.” The voice of the secretary made Naomi startle, a gasp leaving her throat before she could swallow it.

Sebastian’s eyes darted up to meet hers and his face seemed to soften as he took her in.

Fuck him and that look. Naomi didn’t need his pity or whatever the hell that expression was supposed to mean. She marched over to the pew and sat down, angling her body away from him.

“Well, isn’t this familiar,” he muttered, no doubt remembering the last time they’d both been called here.

Naomi shrugged. “Thankfully one of us won’t be here for an entire semester at some point, so we’ll at least get a break from one another.” The words were acidic on her tongue, and she told herself it was because there was a good chance it would be him who enjoyed the time off. Having to postpone your dreams would leave a bad taste in anyone’s mouth.

Sebastian didn’t respond, and Naomi was grateful for it. He’d said enough to her to last a lifetime. The silence between them was heavy and tense, but it didn’t last long.

“The committee will see you now,” the secretary said as she stood before them.

Naomi stood slowly, wishing she were anywhere else. She felt Sebastian move up behind her, but he remained silent. The two of them followed the small woman to a closed door, which she opened to reveal a large boardroom. Seated on one side were Dean Morgan and the members of the committee, most of whom Naomi knew only in passing. They’d come to the Lit Day event, but her interaction with them beyond that was limited. Ron was also there, and he offered them each a small smile as they came in and took seats across from everyone else.

After exchanging greetings, Dean Morgan cleared his throat. “We want to thank you both for the great job you’ve done, not just throughout the past semester, but also throughout your time at Hainamor. We’ve been proud to have each of you as part of our faculty.”

Naomi and Sebastian murmured their thanks, and Naomi silently willed them to get the hell on with it. The suspense felt like a tangible thing that was slowly strangling her. There was sure as hell no need to drag it out.

The dean continued, “Let me begin by saying—”

“If you’ll excuse me for one moment, Dean,” Sebastian interrupted, “there’s something I’d like to say.”

The dean looked slightly annoyed but gestured for Sebastian to continue.

“First of all, I want to make it clear how inappropriate this entire ordeal was. Forcing two colleagues to compete for an award like this is, quite frankly, disgusting and an embarrassment to the mission of Hainamor. You claim it’s to honor distinguished service, but then you make us fight for it, which hardly brings out the best in people.”

The committee reared back almost in unison. Naomi would’ve found it amusing if she didn’t feel on the cusp of vomiting. What the hell was Sebastian doing?

“We’re sorry you feel that way,” Dean Morgan said gruffly. “That wasn’t our intention.”

Sebastian released a dry laugh. “I disagree, but that’s not important at the moment.” Sebastian rested his hands on the table and stared intently at the committee. “I love this school. I respect it as an institution of higher learning, and I feel that I’ve made a real difference in the lives of my students. And because of that, this university has made a real difference in my life as well.”

Naomi rolled her eyes, tired of having to politic with Sebastian for this award. If he wanted to sell himself to these people, he could. Her actions over the past semester should speak louder than any words she could offer, and if they didn’t, then fuck them. If the committee didn’t appreciate what she had to offer, then they were clearly missing out on something special. So was Sebastian, but that was an emotional crisis that would have to wait until later.

“But…”

Here it came. Sebastian’s climactic declaration.

“I don’t give back to it as much as Dr. Price does.”

Wait…what now? Naomi’s head jerked toward Sebastian, and she knew the look on her face had to be comical. She was surprised her eyes were still inside her head.

Sebastian didn’t return her look, though. His intense focus remained on the committee. “She is the embodiment of what we tell prospective students Hainamor is all about. To not acknowledge that is a disservice to the entire school community. And I respect this school too much to let that happen. So, it is with a heavy, yet determined, heart that I withdraw my name from consideration.”

There were so many thoughts flying through Naomi’s mind she wasn’t sure which one to give voice to. “You insolent prick.” Okay, so maybe that had been a poor choice.

Sebastian smirked in response, goddamn him.

Naomi stood so hastily she likely would’ve knocked her chair over had it not been on wheels. “You do not get to hand me an award I’ve earned, Sebastian. You’ll have to put your cross away for another day.”

Sebastian leaned back on his chair and regarded her in that arrogant way he had that made her blood boil. She was going to fucking kill him.

“What?” she continued. “Afraid you weren’t going to win so you decided to pull out of the race? So predictable.”

“Was it now? Because you sure look surprised.”

Naomi glared at him before turning her attention back to the committee. “I verbally attacked a coworker on numerous occasions. Granted it was him,” she jerked a thumb at Sebastian, “and he deserved it, but it was still unprofessional, so I’m no angel.”

Dean Morgan looked over at Ron, confusion clear on his face, before returning his eyes to Naomi. “I honestly have no idea what’s happening right now.”

Sebastian stood then, and said, “I threatened a student.”

“A student who I, however inadvertently, encouraged in developing inappropriate feelings for me,” Naomi countered.

Sebastian snorted. “You did no such thing,” he said to her before redirecting his attention to the committee. “I bribed students to join my clubs at the activities fair.”

“I knew it!” Naomi spat. “Well, I harassed students into signing up at that same event. I’m pretty sure one was even contemplating calling campus security. Oh! And my banner was a giant painting of female genitalia.”

“I went on a bender and didn’t show up for my classes for days following Thanksgiving break.”

“I caused further harm to a person’s preexisting disability.”

Sebastian’s eyebrows rose. “Who did you do that to?”

“You. When your leg hurt, after we, you know…in your truck.” Maybe she shouldn’t have mentioned this one. She felt her face growing warm as she realized what she’d just revealed to a room full of her colleagues.

Sebastian turned so he was facing her completely. “I’m not disabled, you twit.”

Naomi faced him, hands on her hips. “You actually are. I’m pretty sure your arrogance has reached a level where it would qualify.”

“Face it, Naomi. You can’t win this one. I’m a way better bad person than you are.”

“That doesn’t even make any sense. Aren’t you supposed to be good with words?”

Sebastian smiled. “That’s why you should get the award over me. What would this school do without someone to rhyme love and dove ad nauseum?”

She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned into his space. “God, I hate you.”

“Yeah, well I love you, but this probably isn’t the best time to discuss that.”

If Naomi hadn’t been leaning so far forward, his words would’ve likely knocked her back a step. As it was, they made her body go a little slack as she was somehow filled with both warmth and anger. “You are such an asshole for saying those words to me right now.”

“I’m pretty sure we can agree that I’m always an asshole.”

“I’m not sure exactly what’s going on right now, but it is probably best you continue this conversation in private,” Dean Morgan said. “As it is, you’re already making us reconsider awarding the honor to either of you.”

“That actually sounds like a wonderful idea. You should keep the award. I don’t want it,” Naomi said as she made to move away from the table so she could get the hell away from there. But Sebastian’s hand on her arm stopped her. “If you don’t remove your hand from me you’re going to pull back a bloody stump.”

Ignoring her threat, Sebastian said, “You have to take the award, Naomi. You need it more than I do.”

Shaking his hand off of her, she squared off with him. “I don’t need anything. I’ve gotten by on my own for a long time.”

“But it shouldn’t be that way. You deserve to have what you want. And you can have it if you just stop being so damn stubborn.”

“I know that you didn’t just call me stubborn.”

Sebastian took a deep breath in and sounded calmer when he spoke next. “Can we just talk before you make any decisions you can’t undo?” he asked.

“That’s the problem, Sebastian. I think I’m at the point where I don’t want to talk to you anymore.”

He sucked in a deep breath and said, “That’s fine. You can just listen.”

Naomi wanted to say she didn’t want to do that either, but Dean Morgan spoke before she could. “I think we should reschedule this meeting for a later date. Perhaps when you’re both a little more…calm.”

And as everyone on the committee filed out of the room, leaving Naomi and Sebastian awkwardly behind, she resigned herself to hearing him out. Maybe it would give her the closure she needed to move on from this debacle. And him.