Everything Has Changed - Three years ago

“Is she hurt?” Frantic cries meet my ears, but I can’t move. There’s something weighing me down, squeezing the life out of me. Breathing hurts, and my top is wet… Why am I so wet?

“I don’t know! Fuck! Help me get this bitch off her.”

Sawyer … I’d know his voice anywhere. He’s going to save me, help me breathe easier.

“Why did you shoot?” another voice screams, and it’s not Noah.

“I had the shot. Even if I didn’t, she would have killed her if I didn’t try.” Mac. What is going on? I try pushing myself up and a groan escapes me. My arm is tucked under my body; it fucking hurts.

Suddenly, air fills my lungs and the pressure is gone. Gasping heavily, I blink my eyes a few times, but everything is blurry, tinged in red. Someone pulls me free and begins wiping my face with a cloth. That’s good, maybe I won’t be so wet now.

“Princess … fuck. Are you okay? The ambulance is on its way. Please tell me you’re alright.”

The cloth presses harder against my eyes, scrubbing at them. “Why can’t I see, Sawyer? Where’s Noah?”

“She’s okay,” he calls out. “Alive,” he corrects as he carefully pulls my arm toward him, causing me to squeal in pain.

Fuck, that stings like a bitch.

“He’s here, and he’s still breathing. Help is coming, Princess. Your eyes are okay now, you just got … something in them. We’ll get them flushed and you’ll be fine. Help will be here soon.” Sawyer wraps me in his arms and hugs me close to him. He’s not wearing a shirt; there’s nothing but bare skin under my embrace. That doesn’t hold my attention long because from the way he’s breathing and the moisture dripping onto my cheeks, it’s obvious he’s crying. Poor Sawyer, he must have been terrified. But why?

Sara … she was going to shoot me. Then, I remember the shot.

“She shot me?” No, I don’t feel shot … I don’t think. What the fuck just happened?

My frantic cries are muffled as Sawyer tightens his arms around me. I’m trying to blink my eyes open and closed, but whatever is on me is sticky and my eyelashes keep sticking together.

“J, how’s he doing?” Sawyer calls out, still holding on to me in the SUV.

“He’s okay. He’s starting to move. I think she just knocked him out.” The relief in J’s voice is shadowed in fear. Hearing the trepidation in his tone kicks me into gear.

“You left … and she … shit … Noah!” The fear I felt earlier floods back into my heart.

“Ryan hit the panic button on his phone and Mac turned right back around. Thank God he did … we were a split second away from her killing you. Jesus, Princess, what happened?” With his pleading tone, I pull away, blinking my eyes harder and faster, finally getting my lashes to separate and open fully. Sawyer glances from my face to my arm, but my arm wins his attention as he presses his shirt to it.

“Shit, that stings.” I hiss.

“Sorry,” he winces, “I think the bullet grazed you. It’s not too bad, but you’ll probably need some stitches or something. It’s still bleeding.”

“Is that why I’m wet? Why is there so much blood?”

He avoids my question and looks over his shoulder. “It’s going to be okay,” he reaffirms as the sounds of the sirens grow closer. Mere seconds pass before their lights are flashing in the window behind us.

“I need to be with Noah.”

He nods reluctantly and carefully helps me out of the SUV. The paramedics are surrounding Noah, hooking him up to IVs and machines. My eyes take in the scene around us. Sara lies on the ground about three feet away from us. Her eyes are wide open, lifeless, and she’s covered in blood. So am I, I realize, as I look down at my chest.

Oh my God.

The scream escapes my mouth long before it ever catches up to my ears. My body begins to collapse, but Sawyer catches me and holds me steady. Instantly, the rest of the memories flood my mind, but my eyes close and before I know it, I’m floating on a cloud.

The steady beeping of a monitor burrows itself into my head. My eyes flutter open and Sawyer is at my bedside, holding my hand. No longer covered in blood, I’m wearing a blue and white hospital gown and he’s wearing scrubs. My head feels a bit heavy, but I’m calm. There’s a bandage wrapped around my upper arm now, too, but there’s no pain.

When our eyes meet, his pain is palpable. Sawyer wears every emotion he’s got in the depths of his eyes. He looks like a broken man, and I’m terrified to ask about Noah. Tears gather in the corners of my eyes and as they begin to fall, he wipes them away.

“Noah?” His name falls from my lips like a whispered prayer. Sawyer’s expression falls slightly, but he recovers quickly.

“He’s okay … as far as we know. He woke up briefly, and he’s having a CT scan and an MRI. The doctors think it’s just a bad concussion. He’ll need some stitches and some time off, but he’s okay … both of you are.” Squeezing my hand tighter, he chokes out the words as his own tears fall. I can’t imagine what this was like for him.

“Sawyer, I’m sorry … I know this must be your worst nightmare come true.”

He shakes his head and scoots as close to me as he can get, leaning his head against mine. “No, my worst nightmare would have been if I’d gotten there a second later. You’re safe, Princess, and so is Noah. That makes everything right in my book.”

I feel safe curled up with Sawyer, especially since I can’t be with Noah right now. “What about Ryan? Please tell me he’s okay?”

“Yeah, Ryan is fine. He feels awful, but he’s okay. It looks like Sara had a few friends helping her out. I don’t know much, just that they’ve both been arrested pending further investigation.”

“What kind of friends would help someone do what she did?” I’m furious—for all of us, Sara included. They should have gotten her psychological help.

“I don’t know, I’m just glad Mac got her. I only hate you got shot in the crossfire,” he says with a reluctant sigh.

“I was shot?”

“It’s technically a superficial gunshot wound. The bullet went through her and grazed your arm. The doctors cleaned it, gave you a tetanus shot, and started antibiotics. You don’t even need stitches … just wound care. God, Princess, you were so fucking lucky tonight.” His pained words send shivers through my body. We were all lucky, except for Sara.

“I heard the shot. She had just put the gun against my head. Then there was a flash of red and nothing but blackness. I thought …”

Sawyer nods, understanding my unfinished sentence. “She almost did,” he whispers reluctantly. “When we pulled up, she was screaming at you. We used her distraction to inch closer. As soon as she put the gun to your head, Mac took the best shot he had. Fuck, I’m not sure I’ve ever been so scared.” His hands tremble in mine with the wavering of his voice. Gripping my hand tighter, he continues.

“The blood from her wound sprayed you, and when her body fell onto yours, I guess it knocked the wind out of you, or you passed out from the pain and shock. I’m not sure, it all happened so fast. J and Mac were checking Noah … I couldn’t.” His tears begin falling again, but this time he shakes his head and pushes forward. “I had to maneuver around them all, but Noah was almost directly in front of the door. We didn’t want to move him because of his head. I had to climb over Noah, without disturbing him, to get to the door so I could pull her off you. All the blood was hers, not yours. You’re perfect, Princess, and you’re still here with me.”

“I don’t care if Jesus Christ himself is in there with her, you’re going to let me in to see my sister!” Belle’s screams echo from the hall, and her tirade is the first thing to bring a small smile to my face.

Sawyer brings my hand to his mouth and kisses me softly, then drops another kiss to my forehead before standing to diffuse the situation so my pregnant best friend can calm down.

“Oh my God, Mel!” she cries out when she sees me. Her tear-streaked face tells me all I need to know about how scary this was for her. Darren waits by the curtain with Sawyer and gives me a small wave and a smile to match. The sadness in his eyes is unmistakable.

“I’m okay, Belle. Calm down, it’s not good for the peanut.”

“The peanut is just as worried as I am, and she’s manifesting her fear through me. Don’t ever do this to me again!” She climbs up and lies down next to me, crying as she hugs me fiercely.

“Belle, I’m sorry.” My mind is still a bit foggy, and I want to cry, but for some reason the tears aren’t coming.

“Sawyer, did they give me something? I feel … strange?”

He looks up with a half-smile and nods. “You probably will for a while. They gave you something to calm you down and it knocked you out immediately. Then they gave you some pain meds and antibiotics in your IV so they could clean your wound and run some tests. The doctor said you’ll probably be a bit out of it until tomorrow.” Sawyer is really keeping track of the details. I’m so thankful for him tonight.

“Belle, have you seen Noah?”

She looks up at me and wipes away her tears. “No, babe. I just got here, and you were my only priority.”

“Can you get someone to take me to him? Please?” I need to see him and make sure they’re not lying to me.

“His bed is right on the other side of yours, Princess. That’s why the curtain is pulled back in the middle. They’re supposed to wheel him back here after his tests. I couldn’t be in two places at once, so I managed to convince them to keep you both together.”

Darren wraps his arm around Sawyer’s shoulder and squeezes him tightly. “You did good, man.” Sawyer pulls him into a massive hug and sobs. The night is catching up to him; it’s heartbreaking to witness.

“Where are Jordan, Ryan, and Mac?” I’d really like to get eyes on everyone who was there tonight. I think it would make me feel a lot less apprehensive.

“Jordan is in the waiting room with Ryan, waiting for everyone to get here. Mac is still at the scene talking to the police.”

Poor Jordan, I hope this doesn’t mess with him. The two of them have been through so much already; I hate they’re going through it again. Sawyer runs his hands through his hair in frustration. He’s getting anxious Noah’s not back, too, I think.

“You have no idea how scared I was tonight, Mel. I can’t lose you, and I’m glad that bitch is dead after what she did.”

“Belle …”

“Don’t Belle me! You’re the other half of my heart and soul. I’d be lost without you.”

“Eh hem …” Darren fake-coughs to pull Belle’s attention to him.

“Don’t be so easily offended … you know what I mean. You’re all of that and a bag of chips for my romantic heart, but she’s it for my family and best friend side. I’ll never get another sister just like I’ll never get another you.”

Darren covers his heart and stumbles backward as if catching her love. It makes me giggle and for a split second takes my mind off what could possibly be taking them so long with Noah.

“I’m going to see if everyone is here and fill them in. Princess, do you need anything before I go?”

“No, thank you, Sawyer. I’m okay.”

“I’m going to go with him and let the two of you talk.” Darren says as he leans down and kisses Belle and then leans over and drops a kiss against my forehead. “Don’t scare us like that again,” he whispers before leaving.

“Are you really okay?” Belle asks softly after Darren and Sawyer leave the room.

“I’m not sure … I think so, but I can’t even think about myself until I know how Noah is doing. I poured my heart out to him tonight, Belle. Maybe I shouldn’t have. Maybe this is a sign I’m not supposed to get close to anyone.”

“Oh, Mel,” Belle says as she softly strokes my hair, “you deserve love as much as anyone, even more so. I’ve never told you the real reason I live by the motto ‘live today, like there’s no tomorrow’ but maybe it’s time.”

“I always assumed it was because that sums up who you are in a nutshell.”

She nods and squeezes my hand. “In part, yes. But the reason I live that way is because of you.”

“Me?” I’m surprised and more than a little curious.

With a sad smile, she continues, “You’re my sister, Mel, and a part of you died when you lost your mom. It took a while to get you over that hump of pain and sadness, but then you picked yourself up and went back on tour with Eli. Then, when your dad died, it was worse, and it took a lot longer to get you to recover, but you eventually did.”

“Okay …” I’m not quite following her, but maybe it’s because of the meds.

“I admired you for that, for picking yourself back up and moving on. I know you had a lot to deal with, but you made the best of it. It’s just … I also saw those dark days you lived before you moved on and the only thing I wanted for you was happiness. I promised myself, no matter what it took, I was going to try and keep your dark days to a minimum. So that’s when I adopted my motto.”

“Was I really that bad?” I whisper, leaning my head against hers.

“No, babe, you were that brave. I just wanted you to know that instead of dwelling on what you can’t change, you have to live for now. You did that tonight, Mel. When you told Noah how you felt, you were living for the moment. And if things had gone differently, you’d be so glad he knew how you felt before either of you were gone.”

“Thanks, Belle, I needed to hear that.”

“Anytime,” she says, snuggling in closer. “So how did Noah react to the news?”

A smile creeps onto my lips as I recall how happy he was. “He was thrilled.”

“That’s not a big surprise. He already gave you the stars, but if he could, I’m sure he’d give you the moon, too.”

“Ms. Greyson, how are you feeling?” A tall doctor with salt-and-pepper hair walks in, and Belle scrambles out of the bed and into the chair.

“Okay, a bit loopy. Mostly, I’m concerned about Noah.”

He smiles as he finishes putting on his gloves and walks to my bedside. He shines a light into my eyes and checks my monitors. “Do you remember me from earlier?” he asks, taking a seat on a rolling stool.

“No, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, you’ve had a rough night. I’m Doctor Martin, head of the emergency department. Mr. Weston and I are old friends.”

“You sent the cactus.” I state matter-of-factly, and he chuckles.

“Yes, I did. Now, let me fill you in on what’s been going on while you were napping. Noah has been asking for you. He’s as concerned for you, as you are him. But Noah is going to be fine, you both are. As a precaution, and as a favor, we’re keeping you both overnight for observation. The two of you were extremely lucky tonight.”

Noah is going to be fine; the doctor wouldn’t lie to me. Finally, I feel like I can breathe.

“I’ve had Noah taken directly upstairs to a private room. Your nurse will be in shortly to move you up there as well. People are already trying to sneak into the hospital for updates, so the sooner you’re out of the emergency department the better. Your vitals are stable and your gunshot wound is superficial. Once your medication wears off you’ll be a bit achy, but a few days of pain medicine and antibiotics should fix you right up.”

“And what about Noah?”

His eyes soften as they meet mine. “Noah received some stitches, staples, and has a pretty severe concussion. Fortunately, we found no brain swelling or bleeding on his scans, but he will need to take a month off from touring. Concussions are serious. Movement and light could aggravate his pain, he may be forgetful, irritable, emotional, anxious, have trouble sleeping, or sleep a lot. He may also become dizzy, especially during the first week or two. Plan on spending a lot of time with him and giving him more patience than normal. He’ll likely be frustrated because there’s nothing you can do to promote healing a concussion except taking it easy.”

“Noah’s going to hate that, but at least you two will get some one-on-one time,” Belle says optimistically.

“He can hate it all he wants. He’s alive and that’s all that matters. I’ll tie him to the bed if I have to.” My face flushes as I realize what I just said, but Dr. Martin only chuckles.

“You’re not the first woman to threaten that. Tomorrow, one of the hospital psychologists will be coming up to speak with the two of you. After a traumatic incident all of our patients go through an exit exam. It’s only precautionary. You’ll be given signs and symptoms to watch for, as well as treatment referrals and options if you feel you may need them.”

Great. Nothing like trying to figure out if I feel traumatized before what happened has sunk in. But Noah … he might be, so I need to keep an open mind.

“Okay, can I see Noah now? Please?” I’m not above begging at this point.

“Young love, I remember those days. You two take care of each other and tell Noah I’ll see him tomorrow before he’s discharged.” Dr. Martin opens the curtain, and a nurse enters pushing a wheelchair.

Jumping from the bed, I get a little dizzy and have to grab on to the bedrail for support.

“Mel, let us help you!” Belle chastises.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize I wouldn’t be okay.”

With their assistance, I get settled into the chair.

“I’ll be okay, Belle. Go tell everyone I’m fine and they’re moving me up to Noah’s room.”

“They already know.” Sawyer appears in the doorway looking even more ruggedly handsome, if it’s possible. And tired; he looks so freaking tired. “Darren is waiting for you in the lobby, Belle. Go home and get some rest.”

Belle hesitates but finally agrees with him. She leans down and hugs me gently. “I’ll see you tomorrow, get some sleep.”

“You, too, Belle. Thanks for being here.”

With a sad smile, she replies, “Thanks for not dying on me. That would have sucked.”

After the nurse tucks my IV bag in my lap, we start our journey to Noah’s room, with Sawyer walking alongside us. I’m used to his quietness, but it feels like Sawyer has a lot he’d like to say right now.

We take an elevator up several floors, when the doors finally open and we’re let out into a dim hallway. This floor looks like a hotel, not a hospital. The nurse pauses at a door at the end of the hall.

“Let me go inside and get rid of the visitors. They’ve been here longer than hospital policy allows.” When she steps inside, Sawyer releases a deep sigh.

“Sawyer, are you okay? You can talk to me, you know … about anything.”

“I’m not ready to talk but when I am, I promise I’ll talk to you. I’m so fucking grateful we got to you two in time. I don’t want to even think about what would have happened if we hadn’t.”

Reaching over, I pull his hand into mine and squeeze. “Me, either. You saved me tonight, Sawyer. You saved us … and I’ll never forget that.”

Sawyer’s parents come out of the room, and Karen immediately bends down and gives me a hug. “Amelia, sweetheart, I’m so glad you’re okay.” A fresh round of tears begins to trickle down her already tear-streaked face.

Owen pulls Sawyer into a hug and from the way Sawyer’s shoulders slump, it must be the first time he’s let his guard down all night. The overwhelming sadness pulling at my heart strings while watching them is surprising. This family has become everything to me in such a short period of time.

“Okay, time to get Amelia settled for the night.”

Karen releases me with the nurse’s words. “We’ll see you both tomorrow.”

Sawyer bends down and kisses the top of my head. “Night, Princess.”

“Goodnight, Sawyer,” I whisper softly, finding it hard to vocalize the words. All I want to do right now is see Noah, but part of me wishes I could stay with Sawyer to comfort him, too.

The nurse pushes me into the dim room and closes the door behind us. Only the soft glow from a nightlight and light seeping out from the cracked bathroom door illuminate our way.

“Amelia?” Noah’s voice is barely a whisper, but my body floods with relief.

“Yes, Noah, it’s me. Can I spend some time with him please?”

“Of course, but not too long, you both need your rest. I’m going to go get your medicine and we’ll get you settled when I come back.” She pushes my chair next to his bed, and I reach for his hand, immediately bringing it to my lips. My tears are falling freely now that it’s just the two of us. I almost lost him tonight, and there’s no world where that would be okay. He’s my lifeline.

“Don’t cry, baby. I’m okay, but are you?”

“I’m fine, Noah, I was just so worried about you.”

Fuck the nurse. With one hand, I hold my IV bag and with the other, I hold on to the bedrail and climb into bed with Noah. I’m careful to squeeze in between him and the rail so I don’t move him, but right now I have to feel him against me.

After tucking myself in next to him, I lay my head over his heart. Even after everything, it sounds the same—strong and steady. It’s all I can do to choke down a sob; the last thing I want to do is upset him, but I’m so relieved.

“Mel … what happened to us tonight?” His words are soft and unsure. Maybe it’s for the best he doesn’t remember.

“We had an accident, Noah, but we’re both okay. What’s the last thing you remember?”

“Leaving the club, I think. I remember saying bye to Sawyer and J, but it’s all blank after that.”

That’s good, he hasn’t lost much time. Maybe it will come back to him, or maybe not.

A painful hiss falls from his lips, and I try to get up, but his words stop me. “Don’t, Mel, please stay. You’re the only thing taking my mind off the pain.”

It’s not fair; after all he’s been through, he can’t even have medicine to numb the pain. His hand lies loosely on top of mine, but his breathing has slowed and I know he’s already sleeping again. I’m glad; he needs his rest, and I’m more than content listening to his heartbeat until the sun rises.

A few minutes later, someone sighs behind me; this nurse isn’t going to let me stay here any longer. “Come on, Ms. Greyson, I promise you won’t even miss him once your medication kicks in. Tomorrow you can go home and recuperate together.”

Her hand wraps around mine as she helps me out of the bed and into my own. At least we’re together in the same room. “You’ll be getting sleepy pretty quickly. If you need anything, just hit the call button here,” she says, showing me where it is before turning and leaving the room. She wasn’t joking; one minute I’m waiting for her to leave so I can crawl back into Noah’s bed and the next my lids are so heavy I can’t even keep my eyes open.

“Stop!”

“Shh, Princess, it’s okay.” Warm hands close over mine, and my eyes flutter open as my heart continues to race.

“Sawyer?” The room is barely lit, but my eyes slowly adjust to the lighting. “What are you doing here?” My mouth is dry, my voice scratchy. He releases my hands and hands me a cup of water from the bedside table. The water is cold and feels amazing going down my throat.

“I’m not going anywhere. I didn’t convince them to admit you both for observation to leave you alone. I left you once tonight and look where it got us.”

“This isn’t your fault, Sawyer.”

“No, it’s not,” Noah croaks out from behind him. “Are you okay, Mel?” he asks softly, and Sawyer turns around and lifts a cup of water to his lips. Noah sips it slowly, and Sawyer remains at his side, helping him until he’s had his fill. Then they both turn to me expectantly.

“I’m fine. Just tired, I guess. I don’t know what woke me up.”

“You were screaming in your sleep,” Sawyer whispers as Noah’s eyes close again.

Poor Noah.

“I’m sorry. I don’t remember, but I didn’t mean to scare you, or wake Noah. I feel awful.”

“Don’t,” Sawyer says firmly as he sits next to me again. “He’s been awake off and on all night. His pain is keeping him up, not you. And even if you were keeping him awake, it’s how he’d want it. But he can’t be there for you in all the ways he’d like to be, so I’m the next best thing.”

In the shadows, I see the outline of a small smirk creeping up on the corner of his mouth.

“Always so pompous and yet somehow still a gentleman.”

He replies with a snicker, “I’m no gentleman.”

“Keep telling yourself that, Sawyer, but I’m starting to see the light,” I answer with a yawn. “What time is it?”

He reaches to the bedside table and clicks on his phone. “A little after four. Go back to sleep. It will almost be time to go home when you wake up.” He continues to look down at his phone, and I study his profile in the shadow of the light. He’s got the outlines of stubble growing in, and I bet he’d look even more handsome with a close beard. But it would cover that striking jaw line of his; that would be a damn shame. I may be in love with his brother, but Sawyer is still one of the best-looking men I’ve ever laid eyes on.

His eyes slowly meet mine and he looks at me expectantly. “Well?” he prompts, and I sit up a bit in bed.

“Does he know yet?” I whisper, hoping Noah can’t hear me.

With a slight shake of his head, he answers, “I don’t think so. He hasn’t said much. He’s mostly been moaning. It blows they don’t want to give him anything for pain for a few days other than acetaminophen.”

“How do we tell him that? And what about the police? They’re going to want to talk to him.”

“Shh, Princess, we’ll handle it. Tony is already handling the police. They won’t get near either of you until he says it’s okay. When Noah is ready, we’ll tell him … together. Okay?”

“Yeah, okay.”

“You know, Belle was right tonight,” he says suddenly.

“About what?”

“About how bad it would have sucked if you would have died. Don’t ever do that, Princess, okay?”

“I’ll try my best.”

I’m tired, but as strange as it sounds, I’m also enjoying this special time with Sawyer. I’m sure it makes me a horrible person, but I love his vulnerable side. When he gets like this, all I want to do is bottle our time together and make it last forever. Someday, I hope he lets someone in enough to see this side of him all the time. She’ll be one lucky girl.

“Sawyer,” Noah calls out softly. Sawyer swivels his chair around and faces Noah, giving him all the attention he needs.

“Hey, Noah, what do you need?”

“Do we have security set up outside?”

“No one is getting in here, Noah. The hospital is locked up tight. We’re good. I’m not letting anything else happen to you. I promise.” Sawyer reaches over and clutches Noah’s hand. I can’t see his face, but the way Sawyer’s shoulders slump defeatedly tells me all I need to know. He blames himself for what happened tonight, but it’s not his fault.

“You saved us, Sawyer. Stop thinking anything other than that because it’s the absolute truth. If you guys hadn’t come back, there would’ve been a completely different ending. One that would have sucked,” I joke lightly. He nods but keeps all his attention focused on Noah.

“Is everyone okay?” Noah asks, sounding a little more clearheaded than before.

“Yeah, man, everyone is good. You two will be discharged in a few hours, and then we can focus on the two of you getting better.”

I close my eyes and listen to the two of them talk about random things. The sounds of their voices comfort me as I fall back asleep.

“Sawyer, it’s okay.”

“I wouldn’t do that to you, Noah. You have to know that.” Sawyers words are desperate, and I wonder what they’re talking about. I’ve got a feeling it has something to do with me, so I keep my eyes closed a bit longer.

“I do,” Noah replies softly. “Aside from Mel, you are the most important person in my life, Sawyer. Don’t ever forget that.” His words aren’t cautionary; they’re pleading with Sawyer to realize how much he means to Noah.

“I know, and no matter what you might think, I’m glad you found her. The two of you are sickeningly perfect together.”

“What I think, Sawyer, is you put up a brave front, but deep down inside you’re ready to settle down, too.”

Before Sawyer has a chance to reply, I yawn. I’m not sure why I feel the need to save him from answering Noah. When I finally open my eyes, the room is bright from the sun peeking through the blinds.

“Good morning, Sleeping Beauty,” Noah says with a small smile.

“Morning,” I answer, looking between him and Sawyer. Neither of them look great. “How do you feel today?” I ask, turning my gaze to Noah. He’s got a big bruise on the side of his face I didn’t see last night in the dark. It looks beyond painful, but I try not to focus on it because I’m sure he hasn’t seen it yet.

“My head hurts but I can’t sleep. I just want to go home and get into my own bed.”

“Did you get any sleep at all?” I ask, turning my attention to Sawyer.

“Sleep is for pussies. I’ll sleep when you two are home safe and sound.”

“Did someone mention pussy?” Wyatt asks with a forced smile as he peeks his head inside the door.

“What are you doing here so early?” Noah asks him. It’s only then I realize they’re still talking in low tones. Noah’s head must hurt worse than he’s letting on.

Wyatt shrugs and puts his hands in his pockets, propping himself at the foot of my bed. “I didn’t get to see any of you guys last night, and I didn’t sleep for shit. My best friend and his girlfriend were almost killed. Can’t blame a guy for wanting to see for himself they’re okay.”

Noah releases a frustrated sigh. “What aren’t you guys telling me?”

“Nothing, Noah. There’s nothing you need to know right now that you shouldn’t try to let come back to you organically.”

“Mel, I love you, but you’re a bullshit liar.”

Sawyer and Wyatt chuckle at his words and then Sawyer shrugs, deferring to me. “It’s your call.”

Great. Put it all on me. “Fine. But first, you two go out for a few minutes. Let me pee and make sure I’m not going to flash you all my ass. Then we’ll talk.”

“It is a mighty fine ass,” Noah quips, making us all laugh.

After they step into the hall, I gather my gown around me and make my way into the bathroom. At least the last time they came in to check my vitals they removed that stupid IV, so moving around is much easier.

After relieving myself and washing my hands, I go to Noah’s bed and climb in with him. He scoots to the side and wraps his arm around me, hissing with the movement. “Noah, it’s okay, I’ll go back to my bed. You really should stay still if you can.”

“The hell I will. I might not be able to do much, but if I have to lie in bed for a week or more, I’m going to at least be able to put my arms around my girl.”

“Okay,” I reply, kissing him softly before reaching across the table and grabbing my phone. It only takes a second for them to come back in after I text Sawyer it’s okay.

“It’s bad, isn’t it?” Noah questions after Sawyer and Wyatt perch themselves on my bed.

“It depends on your definition of bad,” Wyatt answers truthfully.

“What’s the last thing you remember?” Sawyer asks.

“Leaving the club with everyone. Mac and Ryan were checking the cars. After that, it’s all a blur.”

“We left. Me, J, and Mac. The cars were clear.”

I pick up where Sawyer leaves off. “There was someone screaming. Ryan told us to get in the car and call 911 while he went to check it out. You had me climb in first, and you were right behind me, but then …” I’m choked up even thinking about it.

“Then what?” Noah presses.

“Then she hit you on the back of the head with a gun. Split your head wide open and knocked you out cold.” I absolutely hate having to tell him this.

“Sara?” he whispers as he clutches me tightly.

“Yeah, it was Sara,” I confirm.

“Crazy bitch left you on the ground bleeding out.” Sawyer picks up my slack and continues the story. “She had Princess at gunpoint when we got back. Ryan hit the panic button as soon as the screaming started, so we turned around and came back. Sara was …”

“What, Sawyer?” Noah pleads.

“Damn, Noah, she was insane. She was about to kill her. Her finger was on the trigger, and the gun was pressed against Princesse’s head. I thought we were too late. I thought we were going to lose you both.” Sawyer takes a deep breath and moves to the window overlooking the city below. When he turns around, anger flashes in his eyes.

“She was almost successful. If Mac hadn’t taken the only shot he could get, this would be a different conversation. Even so, it was a long few minutes before we knew if Princess was okay. There was so much blood.”

Noah trembles against me as he begins to understand what Sawyer went through last night. Not only because of Sara but because of his past.

Sawyer continues, “After Mac shot Sara, her body flew into Princess with such force. There was so much blood everywhere. I had to get inside the car and pull Sara off her just to make sure she was alive.”

Noah grips me even tighter, but I still feel him shaking. “I’m okay, though. Just a superficial gunshot wound. It’s my battle scar,” I say, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

“And Sara?” he asks tightly.

“She’s gone, Noah. I’m so sorry.”

Sawyer and Wyatt throw daggers at me with their eyes, and Noah exhales on a sob. He pulls me closer and kisses the top of my head repeatedly. “Don’t you ever be sorry for living, Mel. If it weren’t for me, you’d have never been put in that situation.”

“Fuck no. Don’t put that shit on yourself. Sara’s death is Sara’s fault. That bitch was crazy, and the tragedy here is she never got the help she needed before she died. But this isn’t something either of you could have prevented.”

“What he said,” Wyatt agrees, pointing to Sawyer.

There’s a knock at the door and Dr. Martin comes inside.

“Noah, you’re looking a bit better this morning. How’s the head?”

“Hurts but I’ll live.”

Dr. Martin smiles wide. “You sure will, which is a good thing because I need someone to feed me next Thanksgiving.”

Noah chuckles. “I’ve got your back, don’t worry.”

“I have some good news, Ms. Greyson. We received all the labs back from the deceased, and her blood is clear of any infectious diseases and STIs. You won’t need any long-term antibiotic therapy or drug protocols. You got lucky.”

“I don’t understand,” Noah says, confused. Dr. Martin looks to Sawyer, realizing he may have said more than he should have.

“When Sara was shot, we were inches apart. Her body slammed into mine, that’s how I got the bullet wound. Her blood basically drained out of her onto me. Until Sawyer got her off.” I spare him the details about my eyes. He doesn’t need to know any of that.

“Motherfucker.”

I’m not sure I’ve ever heard Noah use that word in anger before, but I guess it’s appropriate for the circumstances.

Dr. Martin tries to ease the tense atmosphere. “I’ve written out all your discharge instructions and went over them with your parents and Sawyer this morning. I gave Amelia a breakdown of them last night. If you have any questions, you know how to reach me. Someone from psych will be down to ask you each a few quick exit questions and then you’ll be free to go home. Noah, you’ll need to follow up with a doctor or neurologist in the next week, but if you need anything in the meantime, you know how to reach me.”

“Thanks, Dr. Martin.”

“Always a pleasure, Noah, but next time let’s keep you out of my ER, okay?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Dr. Martin turns back to me. “Ms. Greyson, do you have any questions?”

“No, Dr. Martin, but thank you.”

With a nod and a smile, he pats Noah on the leg and makes his exit.

“Sawyer, get Mel some fucking clothes and get us out of here. I’m done. Do whatever you have to do and get us the fuck out of here.”

Wyatt and Sawyer exchange concerned glances. I’ve never heard Noah talk like that to anyone except Sawyer the night he did drugs.

“Mom’s got clothes for you both out in the hall,” Sawyer replies softly, obviously unsure how to deal with Noah’s mood.

“I’ll get them,” Wyatt offers, and pops out into the hall.

“It’s going to be okay, Noah,” I try reassuring him, but he shrugs me off.

“None of this is even close to being okay, Mel. Not by a longshot.”

When Wyatt brings the clothes back in, he and Sawyer leave quickly so we can get changed. Noah hisses as he tries to sit up.

“Here, let me help you.” I offer him my hand, and he looks up at me with tear-filled eyes.

“I should be helping you, not the other way around. I fucking failed you last night. I’m so sorry.” Noah’s shoulders shake with uncontrolled sobs, breaking my heart. Crouching in front of him, I lift his head and cup it in my hands, carefully avoiding his bruise.

“Don’t do this, Noah. You could never fail me. You pushed me into the car, you covered me with your body, protected me from what was coming, even if you didn’t know it. This isn’t your failure, Noah, it’s just something that happened. We’re still here and we’re okay. A little worse for the wear, but both alive. Don’t use this as an opportunity to push me away. Not after I bared my heart to you last night.”

Pressing our lips together softly, I use my thumbs to wipe away his frustrated tears. I’ve never seen him like this. I know the doctor said he could be emotional, and I’ve got all the patience in the world for this man. “I love you, Noah, and we’ll handle this together. Let’s just get home, okay?”

He presses his lips against mine and hugs me close. I’m trying to not lose my balance as I let go of his face and reach around his waist to hug him back.