CHAPTER FIVE
ERIS
Big Shoes
†
I SIGHED HEAVILY AS I shut my laptop. “Why do I even bother? This is just not coming together,” I lamented aloud over my sorry situation.
I was running out of ideas trying to find the right subject for my assignment and time was running out, waiting for no man… or woman. I had a second chance at passing my course, but the process was slow and frustrating. The more I stressed, the more panic seemed to set in. I still had some time left before my final submission and I thought about my promise to Professor Dalton. What started as wishful optimism had given way to a feeling of apprehension.
I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about it as I stared out of the library window at the rain that had now become only a grey drizzle, matching my melancholy mood.
Damn it, Eris. Snap out of it and girl up!
The annoying truth was that my mind kept drifting back to Kyle Hampton. It was fine with him traveling the globe, but now that he was here, in close proximity - that was unsettling. The very thought of him made me shiver. I felt the now all too familiar sweet pulsation between my legs as I, once again, gave my imagination free reign, running wild with thoughts of him tracing the contours of my body with his long fingers, lingering at my breast… the curve of my thigh…
Oh, for crying out loud! This was ridiculous!
Frustrated, I tossed my pencil aside, grabbing my notebooks and stuffing my now collected belongings into my oversized backpack before turning to leave.
†
Lisa Preston had been my roommate since we started college together. She was my age and perfectly likable. We just clicked and seemed to hit it off from the start. Lisa had zero boundaries though. She ate my snacks, used my toothpaste and even went as far as wearing my clothes at times. What was more peculiar was the steady stream of eccentric décor trash she loved to collect. She potted tiny plants in cracked soda cans, made a chandelier out to empty pill bottles and crocheted a small doormat out of recycled plastic bottles. It was like living inside an animated Pinterest page.
Truth be told, I didn’t mind it that much. I liked to think we were kindred spirits of some sorts – both being a bit awkward in our own way.
Our differences were, however, also glaringly obvious - I liked books and she liked boys. I was shy while she was not.
“Eris, are you listening to me at all? Lisa snapped, throwing her hands in the air in a display of mock irritation.
“Sorry, what?” I apologized, stifling a yawn.
“My point exactly. You haven’t heard a word I was saying,” she cried, her concern genuine as she sat next to me on my unmade bed, taking both my hands in hers.
“Honey, you know I love you, so I’m going to say this as nicely as I possibly can… You. Look. Like. Shit. What’s going on with you lately?” her voice soft but stern. “What’s up with those dark circles under your eyes?”
“I eh… I’m just a little… you know… tired.”
She glared at me in clear disbelief. “Really? Tired. That’s your explanation for talking to yourself, looking like death warmed up, and tossing and turning in bed? Which, by the way, interrupts my much-needed beauty sleep!” she cried, waiving her index finger at me.
“Who do you think you’re talking to? Something’s up, I know it. Now – let’s have it. And the truth this time, please,” she said firmly with raised eyebrows, her lips pressed together determinately as she tilted her head slightly.
I sighed, realizing there was no point in hiding it from her.
I told her about my failed presentation, getting a second chance and my sad inability to come up with a suitable topic. I confessed my debilitating fear of talking in front of audiences. “If I don’t pull this off, Lisa, I’ll fail. I feel so inept. So hopelessly lost!”
Lisa nodded sympathetically, although her gaze intensified, “So that’s the only thing keeping you up?”
No.
I bit my tongue and nodded my head, feeling a little bit guilty at withholding such important information.
“Well I know just what you need,” she started, dragging me to my feet. “You need a change of scenery and a magic brew to get those creative juices flowing again.”
My half-hearted protest fell on deaf ears, with Lisa completely ignoring me. She threw my coat over my shoulders and wound the first scarf she could find around my neck.
“Bundle up, dearie,” she said as she all but shoved me out the door. “Don’t want you to catch a cold on top of everything!”
“Yes, mother!” I growled, pulling at the scarf that was now choking me. “Where are we going?”
“Don’t concern yourself with that, baby girl. Mother knows best,” she smirked. We both burst out laughing at her playful jab as we ran headfirst into the soft rain.
†
I stared at Lisa over the rim of the mug, the smell of sweet Spanish latte filling my nostrils as steam formed tiny little droplets on my nose.
“Thanks for bringing me here. You know this is my favorite spot,” I conceded with a smile. I hadn’t returned here since my lunch with Kyle. I pushed the thought aside as I took another sip of the sweet, warm liquid.
“Anytime, honey. You just need to relax and soon something will come to mind for your paper. I just know it,” she said, her confidence contagious.
She was right. I could do this! I was completely capable. Feeling my confidence return, I straightened up a bit as I shuffled back in my seat. “You’re right. I’m a damn good writer. Why should this one little setback get me down?”
“That’s the spirit!” Lisa chuckled, lifting the mug to her lips, sipping her coffee.
She froze, swallowing too quickly and spluttered, trying to wipe away some of the coffee running down her chin.
“Oh. My. God. Take a look at that magnificent specimen!” Lisa gasped breathlessly, her eyes widening as she craned her neck to get a better view.
Used to Lisa’s flair for exaggeration, I smiled indulgently, slowly turning back to looking over my shoulder. My shock was instant at seeing Kyle walking over to the corner table.
Our table.
And he wasn’t alone. He was walking half a step behind a gorgeous brunette, hand in the small of her back as he pulled back her chair before taking a seat next to her. I cringed inwardly, outwardly hunching my shoulders and keeping my face down.
Great. Just great! Another day that just couldn’t get any better!
“Now there is a man that will put me straight at the top of Santa’s naughty list,” Lisa drooled. “The perfect kind of trouble, wouldn’t you say Eris? Oh spank me, Santa, spank me hard!”
“I guess,” I shrugged, trying to appear as disinterested as possible, deliberately ignoring Lisa.
I darted another quick glance in their direction and as soon as I did, I regretted it. The brunette leaned forward to whisper in his ear, pressing the side of her breast against his arm. Whatever she said had Kyle throwing back his head, laughing in amusement.
I felt the ugly tinge of jealousy creeping up my spine, a bitter reminder that he was clearly out my league.
“You are such a prude! Don’t tell me you don’t see it. His mouth makes me wonder what the rest of him would taste like – know what I mean!” she winked, flashing me a wicked smile.
“Oh, Lisa, stop it. You have a boyfriend, for God sake,” I snapped, scowling.
“So what. A girl can’t fantasize?” she shot back. “Shit, did you see that body? How powerful would it be when he presses me up against a wall? And, my God, those feet! You know what they say: the bigger the feet, the bigger the…”
“Lisa!” I practically yelled, wanting to reach out and clamp my hand over her mouth.
Lisa giggled and grinned mischievously, a naughty twinkle in her eyes. “… the bigger the shoes honey, the shoes. What did you think I was going to say, hey? Cock?”
This time, I smacked her on the arm. She yelped and jokingly started to complain at how much it hurt. Then she burst out laughing as she took hold of my hand and squeezed it tightly.
“You’re so sweet.”
“Sweet?” I asked, confused.
“Yes sweet… and gullible. You know I am mad about Mark… and his dick”. She giggled again, clearly amused at the red color flushing my cheeks.
“Come on. Let’s get you home, little Miss Prim.”
I gave her a tight little smile, deciding not to respond to the little nickname. I was just glad that we were leaving. Hopefully unnoticed. Truth be told, I couldn’t stand the thought of Kyle sitting there at our table, only a few feet away from me, completely unaware of my presence.
I had to resist the urge to take a final look as I made a quick exit.
†
I gazed at the soft moonlight streaming through my window as I stretched out on my lonely bed, my thoughts once again drifting to Kyle. I closed my eyes in sweet agony as I turned, snagging my pillow between both my arms, tucking it under my head. I could see him so clearly – his black wavy hair, strong arms, the gorgeous spread of his broad shoulders, tapering down to the narrow thrust of his hips… Then there was his mouth; the top lip not as full as the bottom; it being… well, perfect. Something to sigh over. I let out a soft moan.
I drifted off to sleep, the pulsating ache at the bottom of my stomach a sweet reminder of my longing for him.