Present
Richard is here. This could go very badly…or this could be a good thing. I haven’t exactly told him Paxton is living here with me. It’s not that I’m hiding it from him, we just haven’t spoken much and it hasn’t come up. I need to tell him now though because Pax could be back at any minute.
When I open the door, he smiles and kisses me on the cheek. I invite him in and as he follows me into the apartment, he wraps his arms around my waist from behind, pulling me close.
“I’ve missed you.” His husky voice flutters over the skin of my neck, causing goose bumps to pop up.
Turning in his arms, I look up at him and smile. “It’s only been four days since I saw you, but there is something I need—” He pulls me against him, interrupting me by placing his lips over mine. One thing I’ve always loved about Richard is the way he kisses.
The kiss is warm and inviting, so very Richard, there’s just one problem—something is off. It’s reminiscent of the first days in our relationship. I enjoyed the way the kiss felt, but I couldn’t seem to lose myself in it then…and now suddenly I can’t all over again. My heart was confused before my birthday party, and now things are even more complicated.
“Cassandra.” Richard says my name, walking me backward until my back touches the wall. His hand travels delicately over my skin and he nips at me just the way I like it, making me feel weak in the knees. He moves his mouth back over mine, deepening the kiss. My mind reminds me of our history; my body reminds me of the familiarity. Richard deserves for me to at least pay attention to what we have.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I accept his kiss. As soon as I do, I hear the door slam behind us. We pull apart immediately, and I’m left staring at a stunned Paxton standing in the foyer.
“Who the hell are you?” I hear Richard demand then he glances my direction quickly before turning back to Paxton.
I have no words, especially when Paxton begins walking toward us. His eyes are trained on me until he is standing directly in front of us, and then they move to Richard. Sticking his hand out, Paxton greets him. “You must be Dick!” I cringe at the nickname because I know Richard hates it, not to mention there’s a ring of sarcasm in Paxton’s voice.
Richard takes his hand reluctantly and responds, “Richard…and you are?” My eyes are still bouncing between them.
“Paxton Luke, Laney’s brother.”
“And my current roommate!” I blurt out. They both look back in my direction like they’re just remembering I’m here. Richard looks like he just took a blow to his pride, and Paxton’s lips are turned up at both corners. I can read his eyes—he knows I’m uncomfortable, and he thrives on it.
“Well, that’s my cue,” Paxton announces, turning and heading toward his room. Just before he leaves the room, he turns back, grinning. “Oh, and pleased to meet you, Dick.” Then he disappears through his door.
I can feel Richard’s eyes boring down on me. Quickly, I face him. “I tried to tell you!”
“When?” He begins pacing, stopping with his hands on his hips as he waits for my answer. “Well?”
“Look, I did, or at least I was going to, but then we got a little sidetracked,” I say, trying to explain. I reach out and place my hand on his arm. “It’s Paxton. I’ve known him my whole life…he’s like my…” I swallow hard because I’m about to say something that’s never been true. “He’s like my brother.”
“He didn’t look at you like a brother looks at a sister, Cassandra.” His voice is hard.
Dropping my hand, I straighten my shoulders. “Are you kidding me? This isn’t an issue; it’s just temporary.” My anger is rising because he is both wrong and right at that the same time and I know it. Nothing is ever black and white between Paxton and me, but that doesn’t mean anything is going on. We got along for two days—barely; what’s the big deal? I just don’t want to explain myself to Richard about Paxton or anything to do with him.
“Is this why you didn’t want to stay with me? Is something going—”
Pointing my finger at him, I shout, “Don’t you dare finish that sentence!”
“What? I mean, he reappears in town and suddenly you start doing your Cass thing,” he accuses.
“My Cass thing? Jesus, Richard, this is ridiculous.” I’m getting angrier and angrier. “Paxton and our living arrangement have nothing to do with you and me. We’ve been doing this dance for years. Just last month you told me you weren’t sure you’d ever be ready for a real commitment. We go through the same old thing all the time, dammit. Everything is fine—or at least I thought it was,” I argue.
He walks over to me and pulls me into a hug.
“Not to mention, I’m on deadline, so if I’ve seemed distant, it’s that and nothing else.” I accept his embrace.
“I’m sorry. I just was surprised, that’s all.” I can tell he means it.
“Remember, we promised honesty will always come first,” I remind him.
Richard kisses me, hard and demanding, like he’s staking a claim, but it’s brief. “I gotta go because I have an early flight, but I’ll be back in time for New Year’s Eve on Saturday. What time should I be here?”
We walk over to the door as I answer. “Let’s say eight o’clock?”
“Sounds good.” He leans forward and kisses me sweetly on my forehead.
“Be safe, and see you when you get back.” I hug Richard and shut the door behind him.
When the door is closed, I lean my back against it and let out a long sigh. Everything feels wrong, even more so than it did a few weeks ago. Walking to the living room, I fall back onto the couch. I lie there a moment and listen carefully for any indication that Paxton is moving behind that wall.
I think about the look on his face—there was something in the way his eyes met mine, like he was asking me for something, but I don’t know what it is. I’m a little torn. Richard believes me when I say this has nothing to do with Paxton…the problem is, I don’t know if I believe me.