“Yeah?” I rasped into the phone.

It was after midnight, and I’d been involved in a very detailed dream re-enacting the other night with Cassidy. Only this time it wasn’t Jonah interrupting us. It was Devlin.

“Bowie, I could use a favor,” Devlin announced crisply in my ear.

“Now?” I asked, staring blearily at the clock.

“It can’t really wait.”

“‘Kay.” I came to a seated position.

“I need you to drive over to my place and grab the billfold out of Scarlett’s underwear drawer.”

“Don’t go diggin’ around in there!” I heard my sister shout in the background.

“Billfold. Underwear drawer,” I repeated, pulling on a pair of jeans from my dresser.

“Then I’m going to need you to drive down here to the police station.”

“You’ve got to be shitting me.”

“I assure you. I’m not shitting you. There was a little altercation tonight—”

“I told you. Did I not tell you to watch those girls?” I was wide awake now, grabbing a sweatshirt and sneakers on my way out the bedroom door.

“What the hell’s going on?” Jonah demanded from his doorway. “Why does shit always happen in the middle of the night in this house?”

“Girls got arrested,” I filled him in.

Jonah perked up. “Lemme grab my shoes. I’ll come with you.”

“Thanks, Bowie. Appreciate it,” Devlin said.

“That’s what family’s for.”

I did the math and told Jonah to drive separately.

Deputy Bubba Rayhill was pacing the sidewalk in front of the police station when I pulled up. “How’s it goin’, Bubba?” I called, sliding out from behind the wheel. Jonah hopped out of his vehicle and joined us on the sidewalk.

“Thank god you’re here. We gotta get this mess cleared up before Sheriff Tucker gets wind that I had to arrest his wife and daughters,” Bubba said, wringing his hands.

“I’ve got the cash,” I said, waving Dev’s billfold like a Willy Wonka golden ticket.

“Thank you, sweet Jesus,” Bubba said throwing up a prayer to the winter sky.

Jonah and I followed him into the station, and it took all of half a second to know why the man had been waiting on the sidewalk for us.

The noises coming from the holding cell were an unholy cacophony.

“Y’all started it!”

“No, you all started it!”

“Girls, I don’t care who started it because I’m gonna end it by dunking all your heads in this toilet.” That last one came from Nadine Tucker, who was standing between Cassidy and Misty Lynn. The cell was so crowded that Devlin was pressed up against the bars in the corner, holding Scarlett around the waist as she tried to join the fight.

“If this is how eating my feelings ends, I’m never attempting it again,” June grumbled from the cot. Two women I didn’t recognize were taking turns wailing and blowing their noses.

Lula looked unruffled, pressed up against the stainless-steel sink mounted to the wall. She was admiring her nails as if she were contemplating a manicure color.

“Ladies…and Devlin,” I said.

They all launched themselves at the bars, talking at once and pointing fingers.

Cassidy was flush-faced and was glaring pitchforks at Misty Lynn, who was reaching for me through the steel bars. “Hey there, Bowie. Nice of you to come down and see me,” she purred.

“That’s it! You keep your hands off of the Bodines, you herped harpy.” Cassidy grabbed Misty Lynn by the bleached-blonde hair and pulled.

Devlin waded in as the women rolled around on the cement floor.

“We’ve been through this, ladies,” he said, prying them apart. Unsupervised, my sister climbed up on the cot like it was the ropes of a wrestling ring.

She hurled herself down on top of Misty Lynn, and the fighting began again.

“I’m so gettin’ fired for this,” Bubba muttered under his breath as he fumbled with the door keys. “Y’all stop that, right now!”

June scooted over two inches to avoid the hair extension that Scarlett threw in her direction.

Bubba hurried inside and made a grab for Misty Lynn, knowing better than to try to go for Scarlett. She was a biter in close quarters.

I sighed and followed him inside. I wasn’t afraid of Scarlett’s canines. Not after having grown up with her. Hell, we’d taught her all her fight moves. It made it easier for me to anticipate the elbow she threw at my jaw.

“Chill the fuck out, Scar,” I growled at her. Cassidy was trying to kick at Misty Lynn while Devlin picked her up off the ground.

“Trade me,” I shouted. We swapped the women we were wrangling, and I got Cassidy cornered up against the cinder block wall. “Hey there, Cass.”

She stopped squirming against me and hiccuped. Drunk Cassidy made very few public appearances. It was usually my sister drinking to excess, and Cassidy playing the responsible one. I had to admit, she was one hell of an adorable drunk.

“Hey, yourself,” she responded, tilting her head until her ear touched her shoulder.

“Whatcha doin’?” I asked, ignoring the commotion behind us.

“You’re really, really good-looking,” she announced, her eyes wide.

“Why, thank you.”

She frowned at me. “I think I’m forgettin’ something.”

“What kind of something.”

“Something that has to do with you,” she said, closing one eye and tilting her head to the other side. She brought her finger up to my nose and poked me probably harder than she meant to. “I like your nose.”

“I like all of you, Cass.”

She brightened and then her face immediately changed to a fierce frown. “I know what it is! I’m mad at you! Very, very mad.” She poked my nose again.

“Why’s that?” I asked, grinning at her.

“I don’t know, but when I remember, you’re gonna be in b-i-g trouble.”

“Well, I’m sure I deserve it.”

She nodded fiercely. “Yep. You definitely do. So, what are you doin’ here?”

“I came to get my girl,” I told her.

“Your girl isn’t Misty Lynn, is it?” Cassidy demanded. “Because she’s a stupid face and a terrible human being.”

“You’re my girl, Cassidy Ann.”

“I am?” She grinned at me like I’d given an entire orphanage Christmas presents.

I nodded. “You sure are.”

She frowned again, trying to do some figuring. “Was I always your girl? ‘Cause this feels kinda new.”

“Oh, Cass,” I sighed, stroking a thumb over her lower lip. “Always. You’ve always been my girl.”

“Misty Lynn said she was gonna show up on your doorstep and be neighborly.”

“She did now?” Fucking Misty Lynn. Her two main superpowers were seducing stupid men and pissing off anyone with lady parts.

“She didn’t show up, did she?” Cassidy asked very seriously.

“No, honey. She didn’t. She’s trying to kick my sister’s teeth out right now.”

“Oh! Good! That’s really good,” Cassidy breathed a sigh of relief that smelled like blueberry moonshine. I made a mental note to keep her away from open flames for the next hour or two.

“Cass, honey, can you stand right here and not move while I help Jonah and Bubba and Devlin?”

She looked at me like a cartoon deer, all big eyes and sweetness. “I sure can,” she promised chipperly. “Question: Do you think you’ll kiss me again tonight? ‘Cause I really, really like it when you do that. Asking for a friend.”

I was definitely enjoying this momentary amnesia. I wanted to bundle her up and take her home and let her pass out on me. “Cassidy, I promise to kiss you every chance I get.”

“Yay!”

I propped her against the wall and went to work separating Misty Lynn’s henchwomen, who’d started arguing about God knows what. Bubba had scratch marks on his neck. Devlin had tossed Scarlett over his shoulder and was spinning her around until she was too dizzy to fight anymore.

Jonah had cornered Misty Lynn who—enjoying the attention—flashed him her tits.

“Look away, Jonah!” Scarlett screeched. “Look away! She’ll hypnotize you with them and then cut your dick off!”

“Fuck you, Scarlett!” Misty Lynn hollered.

“I’d say fuck you, Misty Lynn, but just about everyone in this town has had their turn already,” Scarlett shot back.

“What do we do?” Bubba demanded, picking the second henchwoman up off the floor and leaning her against the bars.

“Okay, this here’s what we’re gonna do,” I announced, adopting my best vice principal tone.