Twenty
Libby
“Oh my gosh, Libby. You look spectacular.”
“I still can’t believe this is happening. Joanna, I... I’m getting married.”
“If I looked that good at eight and a half months pregnant, I would’ve gotten married then, too,” Joanna said.
“I still can’t believe he threw this together so quickly,” I said.
“I told you. All you had to do was be honest with a man like Graham. That man out there loves you. He’d give you the world if he asked for it.”
“All I want is him, Joanna. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“And in a few more minutes, he’ll be all yours,” she said.
The dress I was wearing framed my very pregnant body wonderfully. It had a heart-shaped bodice made of shining fabric and light, lacy sleeves that slipped off my shoulders. The body of the dress fell around my stomach nicely and hung towards the floor, billowing out at my ankles. Every time I moved, it swished against my legs, making me feel like the princess I had always wanted to feel like at my own wedding.
“Ready for the finishing touches?” Joanna asked.
My veil was a full-length veil that had a beautiful lacy train behind it. My makeup was minimal, but Joanna insisted on the ruby red lips. Graham had left me a gift that morning in my room before we parted ways to get ready, and I was wearing it around my neck: a beautiful pearl necklace with matching stud earrings that went well with my hair piled high on my head.
I’d never felt more beautiful in my entire life.
“Is it normal to be nervous?” I asked.
“I was petrified,” Joanna said.
“So… I should be,” I said.
“What? Nervous? Not all brides are. Why, are you not nervous?”
“No. I’m really not.”
“That’s a good thing. It means you have one less thing to worry about,” she said.
“I think my biggest worry right now is going into labor during my wedding.”
“You’re getting married today even if I have to hold you up with my bare hands. Nothing is stopping this from happening. By the time today is over, you will be Mrs. Graham Alexander.”
“Joanna?”
“Yes?”
“Thank you for being my matron of honor.”
I turned around and hugged my friend, holding her as close as I could get her. This was it. We were minutes away from walking down the stairs to get ready for the ceremony. I tried to keep the tears at bay as Joanna rubbed my back, cooing in my ear that things would turn out just fine. It wasn’t that I was worried about my future. A life with Graham was the only thing I wanted from the moment I watched his daughter dance on that stage.
But I was worried about raising three kids that technically weren’t mine.
“You’re going to be a spectacular mother,” Joanna said breathlessly. “To all of those kids.”
“How can you always read my mind?” I asked.
“It’s a gift,” she said. “And it comes with a great deal of responsibility.”
“You’re insane.”
“And you’re ready. Want me to help you down the stairs?”
I took Joanna’s hand and we went to take our place at the same altar I had watched Logan say his vows at all those months ago. The music struck up and she processed down the aisle, her beautiful bouquet of flowers in hand. I gripped my flowers tightly as I focused on the beautiful pinks and yellows and reds. Neither Graham nor I could decide on which two colors to pick, so we simply went with all three. Pink for the dress I wore that he first saw me in, yellow for the sun Graham claimed that shined against my body in the mornings, and red for the fiery passion that had been stoked between us.
He was such a romantic, and it was one of the main reasons I loved him.
The music changed to my processional and I drew in a deep breath. I raised my head as two men opened the doors for me, and I felt the air leave my lungs. There was Graham, in a tailored tuxedo, looking straight at me. With his crimson-red button-down shirt and a pale-yellow tie, he had a light pink flower attached to the collar of his tuxedo jacket. He looked spectacular with his piercing eyes and his strong stance.
I wanted to go to him.
I wanted to run into his arms and never let go.
“Are you ready, princess?”
I looked over at my father as he offered his arm to me.
“Are you okay, Daddy?” I asked.
“I have to admit; your mother and I were worried about how quickly the two of you were diving into this. But I see the way he looks at you and I see the way you look at him. It’s reminiscent of the way your mother and I used to look at one another.”
“Probably not the best omen to start my marriage with,” I said with a grin.
“If there’s one piece of advice I can give you, princess, it’s this. Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in the small things. Your mother and I did that. We focused so much on you that we lost ourselves. The anger from our arguments made us focus on things that didn’t matter. Where we were spending holidays, what presents to get you for Christmas, stupid things like that. Take time to be with Graham. It’s okay to use the nanny if you need time off. And never, ever, ever go to bed upset. Always resolve. Always compromise. And always cling to one another. Even if you can’t stand to look at him.”
“Thanks, Daddy,” I said breathlessly.
I threw my arms around my father, willing my tears to stay at bay. I linked my arm in his and we started down the aisle, my mother peeking her head around from the crowd to get a glimpse of me. Lizzie was standing by Joanna up at the front and Jake was wrangling Deacon and Daniel in his arms. It had been a doozy meeting Jake, and he sure was a wild one. He was insistent on Graham having a bachelor weekend in Las Vegas, and when the two of them returned Graham looked like he had been run through a wood chipper.
He was a good friend to Graham, and though he was wild and very boisterous at times, I enjoyed being around him. He was supportive of the two of us and very excited at the idea of Graham having another child.
Despite him being a party boy, he really was good with the kids.
My eyes locked with Graham as my heart thundered in my ears. This was it. This was my chance at my own happily ever after. My father lifted the small veil over my eyes and kissed my cheek, then he handed me off to Graham as our fingers laced together.
Then the ceremony began.
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in front of God and family to celebrate the union of these two people. If there is anyone here who objects to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace.”
I scanned the audience and saw someone stand. Who the hell was that?
“That’s okay. If they have issues, they know where the door is. Don’t panic,” Jake said.
As I looked up again I recognized the woman walking out of the wedding. It was Graham’s ex. She had finally given up. She had let him go. Let the kids go. I didn’t even know why she showed up, honestly. Except maybe, this was her way to make peace. To know that he was okay. That her kids would be taken care of. That she could finally let go.
Graham was mine.
A massive smile peeled across Graham’s face. He was free.
“Thanks, Jake.”
“Not a problem, Libby,” he said with a wink.
“I hear the couple have written their own vows,” the minister said. “Mr. Alexander, I’ll hand it over to you.”
“Libby, there are no words to describe what this moment means to me. But that’s all this is. It’s a moment. A triumphant celebration in a long line of celebrations I want to have with you for the rest of my life. This isn’t an end point, or a final leg of the race. It’s the beginning of something new between us, and I want you to understand that I know that. I know it doesn’t end here. I know this isn’t the end goal for us. And no matter what I have to do—no matter where I have to go—as long as you are happy and taken care of, I don’t care. Nothing else matters to me. I love you, Libby. I loved you the moment I saw you hold my sons, I loved you the moment you told me you were pregnant, and I will always love you. No matter what comes our way.”
I watched as Graham slipped my wedding ring onto my finger, my tears no longer held back. I felt them dripping down my cheek and I watched as they fell to the top of Graham’s hand. He cupped my chin and raised my head, then swiped his thumb along my tears.
And then my own vows flew from my lips.
“I never saw this for myself,” I said. “I knew I wanted it. I wanted a husband. Children. A family. But I never saw it happening. I never saw it coming to fruition. The day I met you, when you came to my rescue at that wedding, I was taken by you. Entranced and completely confused as to why a man like you would stick by the side of a woman like me. You, a strong, capable, confident man… and me. A quiet, timid, lifeless woman. But you taught me something, Graham. You taught me that I was none of those things. You showed me what it meant to be better with someone. You dug out within me what was always there, but I was too blind, or scared, or isolated to see it myself. I’ve loved you even before you had a name. Even before you had a face or a personality or a purpose… I have loved you. And I will do whatever it is within my power to make you happy. No matter what it costs me.”
I watched Graham’s eyes well with tears before I turned my gaze to Lizzie.
“I have something I’d like to tell you, Lizzie.”
I slipped my hands from Graham, then bent down to her level and looked directly into her eyes.
“Hey there,” I said with a smile.
“You look really pretty,” Lizzie said.
“Thank you. So do you,” I said. “I want to tell you something.”
“Is everything okay?” she asked.
“Oh yes. Everything’s fine,” I said. “But I have a promise to make you, too.”
“What is it?” she asked.
“I promise to love your father, but I also promise to love you. I promise to always be there to tuck you in at night and read you a story. I promise to love you as much as I can for as long as I can. You and both of your brothers.”
“And my sister?”
Her hand planted against my stomach as tears sprang to my eyes again.
“And your sister,” I said breathlessly. “I promise to always be there to cheer you on. I promise to be the biggest fan of your life. I promise to protect you in all the ways I can and fight with you as you grow older to make sure you stay on a path that is good, just, and worthy of the pride of your father. I promise that I will never try to replace anything you don’t want me to replace, and I promise you—no matter what, I will always be there to love you. No matter what you do. Good or bad, no matter where it lands you. I will always be there to love you.”
Lizzie threw her arms around my neck and buried her face into my body. I felt her shoulders shaking as tears barreled down my cheeks. Lizzie was so precious to me. They all were. Deacon and Daniel were clapping and giggling as Jake struggled with them in his arms.
“I love you, Mommy,” Lizzie said in my ear.
I curled my lips into my mouth as I picked her up in my arms.
“I love you, too, Lizzie,” I said breathlessly.
I turned around to see Graham’s cheeks stained with tears. I watched him take Deacon from Jake’s arms as Joanna handed me his wedding ring. I slipped it onto his finger, bringing the back of his hand to my lips to kiss.
Then the minister cleared his throat.
“By the power vested in me by the State of Illinois, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Mr. Alexander, kiss your beautiful bride.”
Graham wrapped his arm around me and planted a kiss directly onto my lips. Lizzie wrapped her arms around our necks, pulling us both in for hugs. The audience behind us erupted into glorious applause, a ruckus of noise that drowned out Daniel and Deacon’s grunting and groaning to get down and run around.
“Should we let them take off?” I asked.
“I think we should,” Graham said.
We put the kids down and they took off down the aisle. I held Graham’s hand tightly, leaning into him as I waddled down the aisle. I could hear Jake and Joanna talking about the reception behind us and which one of them was going to field which kid. But all I could think about was the man at my side. The strong, handsome, intelligent man with a heart of gold, a body of steel, and a soul filled with pride.
“I love you, Graham Alexander,” I said as we walked out to the limo.
“And I love you, Libby Alexander.”