****
A week went by and we still hadn’t found an antidote for the virus. We worked around the clock and took naps when one or both of us were tired. Knox had us under constant supervision, worried that Ramon would lose consciousness and go rogue at any moment. He came by occasionally to check on us himself, but he mostly had Trent watching over us while he kept an eye on Cassidy.
There were a few scares. There were times where we’d have to stop working because a part of Ramon’s body would shift, and towards the end of the week, Trent and I grew worried as he began to growl in his sleep.
“I’m not sure how much longer he’s going to be able to hold this back. I can tell he’s fighting it, but the virus will take over completely at some point,” Trent admitted as we watched Ramon snarling and twisting in his sleep; his symptoms always seemed to be the worst at night.
“We’ll just have to be on guard. The second he fully shifts or stops responding to us, we’ll have to take him in.” My heart ached with every word that escaped my lips. I didn’t want Ramon behind bars, but I knew once the infection progressed to the point where we would have to secure him, he wouldn’t be ‘Ramon’ anymore. He would just be his bear, rabid and ferocious.
The next day only made me more afraid.
Ramon and I were extracting some fresh samples of the virus from a new tick for our next round of testing. Ramon was holding the scalpel, ready to make an incision into the tick’s belly, when his hand began to shake. At first, it was a slight tremble, but it quickly advanced into a violent vibration.
“Ramon?” I looked up at him and he was just staring at the tick, shaking uncontrollably. “Ramon! Are you okay?”
He didn’t answer me, but his eyes met mine, and they were pitch black. His pupils had fully dilated, and a low rumble began emanating from his chest, growing to a terrifying growl seconds later.
“Min, back away.” I could hear Trent’s voice, but I couldn’t take my eyes off Ramon. He was looking at me, but his eyes went through me. “Min, you’re going to want to start back up…Now!”
In the blink of an eye, Ramon was gone, and a bear stood where he once did; growling, snarling and towering over me. I screamed and immediately scampered back.
Suddenly, another bear came from the side and tackled the one in front of me, pinning it to the ground. I watched as Ramon’s bear struggled against Trent’s, but Trent’s bear was much larger and just had to lay on top of Ramon’s to overpower him.
I watched the bear below Trent’s submit, and Trent’s bear rose, holding his paw against the smaller bear’s back.
Slowly, before our eyes, Ramon appeared again, unconscious; Trent used that as a cue to return to his human form as well.
“It’s time, Min.”
I could feel my chin quivering as I nodded. I knew he meant it was time to have Ramon locked up, and tears trickled down my cheeks.
“I don’t know if he’ll still be himself when he comes to, so I think you should be prepared for that.” Trent’s voice was grim; I could tell he felt my pain. I was losing a mate, but he was losing a good friend.
I was suddenly overwhelmed.
“Do you think if I talk to him, he can hear me? Or understand me?” I choked through my tears, holding back a sob.
“Who’s to say? It’s worth a shot. Just let me get him in cuffs, just in case he experiences another setback.” Trent seemed very tentative to handcuff Ramon. He was hesitant, but his sense of duty seemed to overpower any other thoughts as the he restrained his friend.
I walked over to them slowly and knelt down by Ramon’s head. I reached out my shaking hand to touch his hair, terrified that he’d glare at me with those eyes again. But, he didn’t stir as I stroked his sweat drenched head. I touched his forehead and his fever was worse than ever. A sob finally escaped me, and Trent padded over to console me, rubbing my back.
“Ramon…I don’t know if you can hear me, but I want you to know—I need you to know—I love you! And I will keep working on this antidote day and night until it clicks. I will not let you die…but you have to fight, too, okay, baby? I know you can’t promise me, but I need you to fight this until the very last second. If not for me, for our child.”
I was not much of a crier; in fact, I couldn’t remember the last time I cried. But in that moment, I was sure I sobbed more than I ever had in my life. I wanted Ramon to survive; I needed him to.
“Alright, I’m going to take him to the holding cell. I know you said that you’d want to work on the antidote at the lodge if he’s locked up, and I want you to know that’s still okay. Behind bars, he can’t harm you; they’re specifically designed to withstand bear strength, so there’s no way he could escape and hurt you. Either way, I will be there to make sure of it. So, if you’d like to go there, you’re still welcome to.” Trent rested a hand on my shoulder and gave me a reassuring look.
I tried to wipe my face and nodded. “You go on ahead. I’ll take my car; I remember the way.”
“Okay, I’ll see you soon. Try not to take too long or I’ll worry you ran for the hills or something.” Trent smiled, but I couldn’t find it in me to return the gesture. I appreciated his effort, but all I could think about was never being able to talk to Ramon again, never hearing his adorable Spanish phrases and smart-ass jokes.
I watched Trent lift Ramon’s naked body and carry him out. My eyes followed them until they disappeared out the door and a whole new wave of sobs crashed over me.
How can I raise a bear shifter? I hardly know anything about them! I need Ramon. He has to make it through this!
I wasn’t particularly religious, but in that moment, I prayed as hard as I could. I prayed to anyone listening, whoever was up in the sky, to give me the guidance to find the antidote for Ramon, for our child. And I kept repeating that prayer, hoping that the more I said it, the higher it would reach. If I could speak it into existence, it would happen. I just had to keep praying, keep saying it. I could will it to happen if I tried hard enough.
Or at least, that’s what I kept telling myself.