It would be so much easier to stay like this—tangled together in bed with Leo for the rest of the day.

I did something to him last night, I think. Frightened him, maybe. And I’m not sure if it was how I nearly left after Stephan twisted my arm to go or if it was the conversation we had last night in my closet. But the way he’s behaving today—it’s the same as always, but there’s something else. His actions all seem to be tinged with…something. Almost desperation. Like if he lets me out of his sight for even a moment, he’s going to lose me.

The thought of going to see his mother for tea this afternoon seems to be almost as terrifying for him as it is for me—just different. I’m afraid of the questions she’s sure to ask me. Leo seems to be afraid of allowing me to leave my room at all. Especially if we aren’t hand in hand.

The tour of the palace he’s promised me never materializes. The few times I’ve actually managed to extricate myself from his arms since our tea this morning have met with some excuse for us to return to bed. He needs to kiss me one more time. He needs to feel me in his arms just once more. And it’s pretty difficult to argue with him—I barely want to admit it to myself, but I need those things almost as much as he seems to. But I’m sort of hating how fragile all this seems—how it seems like one wrong move by either of us is going to cause this whole relationship to come crashing down at our feet. And I’m afraid it will—terrified and almost certain it will. And it’s making everything that could be so beautiful—so right—almost suffocating instead.

He’s exhausted himself and is asleep again when I’m finally able to slip out of bed and into the shower. I lock the door—as much as I might like to shower with Leo again, I need a few minutes alone. I know he thinks he’s taking my mind off whatever is going to happen this afternoon, but in some ways, he’s making it worse. There’s something about what’s going on right now that is almost unbearable—stifling. And I know the only reason he’s acting this way is because of my constant threats to leave.

I get into the shower and try to weigh my options. Leo has already said that if I should run away again, he’ll find me. It’s a little stalkerish, but I don’t think he really means it that way. I’m pretty sure he has no idea what a relationship is supposed to look like. I’m not much help in that department—the few relationships I’ve had haven’t been anything like this. I’ve never felt anything like what I feel for Leo, so I can almost understand his need to hang on—it’s just a little overwhelming.

So, I guess I can’t leave. Not without Leo, anyway. And being anywhere outside this palace with Leo presents its own problems—namely the paparazzi. And he’s on a short enough leash with his father. As nice as it would be to not be under the thumb of this stuffy palace and its outdated traditions, the alternative seems a lot worse. I don’t think I can ever live again with camera flashes popping in my face. The few days I had to put up with it when he was at my house were bad enough. If we leave Montovia, it will only be worse.

The only other alternative seems to be for us to agree to part ways. I could tell him that this life isn’t for me and hope he would agree to stay here—out of my life. The way he’s behaving now, though, doesn’t make it seem like this is a likely scenario. And after the past few nights, I’m not sure that it’s one I want, anyway.

I turn off the shower and pull on a robe—dressing gown. Oh, hell. I’m never going to learn the traditions of this place.

I’m combing out my hair when I hear the knock on the door. At least he knocked… It somehow wouldn’t have surprised me if he’d found a way to pick the lock.

I crack the door open, and Leo grins at me. The glint in his eyes tells me exactly what he’s thinking about doing with me, especially when his gaze drops to the open neckline of my robe.

His voice is low, almost a growl. “Elle…”

I groan and swing the door the rest of the way open before I step back to the mirror to finish with my hair. “I have to finish getting ready, Leo.”

He walks behind me, sliding his arms around my waist and places a kiss on my neck. “You’re beautiful.”

“Well, I have my doubts that your mother will think so if I walk into tea wearing only a robe…dressing gown.”

He grins at me through the mirror and gives my neck another hasty kiss before he pulls away. “She’s going to love you.”

I pull my hair up, twisting it into something of a loose bun before I glance back up at him. “I would like to believe you. But…” I spin to face him. “I have my doubts.”

His smile falls a little. “She will love you. She’ll love you because I do, Elle.”

I frown and edge around him without answering before I walk back into the bedroom. I take the dress Leo chose for me last night off the hanger and pull it on.

He steps behind me again, sliding the zipper up my back.

My eyes close, and I try to hide the shiver that runs over my skin at his touch. I’m still not sure how he’s able to do this to me—make an action as simple as pulling up my zipper turn into something so erotic.

But there’s too much to remember. Too many rules about manners—too many possibilities for me to fuck this up. As much as I hate to admit it, I really want to impress his mother. Maybe impress isn’t quite the right word—I suppose I just don’t want her to hate me. I don’t want her thinking I’m some sort of trollop the way Stephan and probably Andrew and the king already do.

I need another ally here if I’m going to make this work. I’m already too prone to running away from my problems, and having the queen hate me isn’t going to help me break that particular habit. It’s only going to make me want to run even more.

I pull on my shoes and give myself another quick look in the antique full-length mirror that sits in the corner of my bedroom before I turn back to Leo. “I guess if you can tell me how to get there, I should—”

“Nonsense. I’ll walk with you.” He smiles and extends his elbow to me. “You’re going to be fine, Elle.”

I shake my head as I place my hand on his arm. “There’s too much to remember. And no mnemonic devices for the etiquette rules. If I could make something up, I think I’d be okay. But there’s too much. Too many don’t-clink-the-glass and cross-your-legs-at-your-ankles kind of rules. Nothing as easy as memorizing the cranial nerves or anything.” Fuck, I would almost rather be taking exams in medical school right now than trying to remember these arcane rules.

He only lifts a brow, giving me the amused smirk he shows me when he thinks I’m being ridiculous.

“Cranial nerves, Leo. Twelve of them—and there’s a saying to remember them. I still say it to myself when I’m trying to remember what cranial nerve number five is or whatever. And there’s no On-Old-Olympus-Towering-Tops saying to remember not to take something from the second tier of food before everyone has eaten something from the first. Because what if I don’t want a fucking finger sandwich? What if what I really want one is of those raspberry pastries from the bottom tier? I really have to force myself to eat two other things I don’t even want—?”

He interrupts me by pressing his lips against mine, sliding his arms around my waist. He pulls away after a moment and tips his forehead to mine. “You’re worrying far too much about this, Elle. It’s tea—not an inquisition.”

My breaths slow a little in his arms, but not much. I shake my head. “It might as well be, Leo. I’m going to do something stupid—you don’t know me. It’s what I do. I’ll let an f-bomb slip or I’ll chew with my mouth open. Or—God, forbid—I might clink my spoon against the antique china.”

He chuckles and places a kiss on my cheek before releasing me from his embrace. “I’ll look forward to hearing about that tonight, then.”

“Oh, God.” I shake my head—if he didn’t seem so amused by this, I think I’d be crying. “You really have no reference point, Leo.”

“I know.” He pulls my hand into his and opens the door to my suite, motioning me out. “I don’t mean to make light of the situation, Elle. But I wish you would believe that you have nothing to concern yourself over. You look beautiful—more beautiful than any woman with whom I’ve ever had the pleasure of having tea. Not that my mother has invited me to tea this afternoon.” He smiles and glances over at me as he leads me down the hallway. “Allow her to lead, and you’ll be fine.”

Right. I let out a long breath—I probably am making too much of this, but I can hardly help it. It takes quite a bit to get me to freak out—and having tea with a queen seems to be up there with the things that are capable of sending me over the edge.

My whole body stiffens when I hear the voice behind us. “Your Highness. Miss…”

“Doctor,” I grumble under my breath. Not that I expect Stephan will ever honor my title.

“Yes, right.” He clears his throat, the sound of disgust obvious. “Miss, Her Majesty is waiting for you. I will accompany you to her sitting room.” He clears his throat again. “The presence of His Highness is requested by His Royal Majesty in his office at this time.”

Leo spins around to face Stephan. “I will be accompanying my guest. You may inform my father that I will be with him shortly.” His grip on my hand tightens and I can see his other hand curl into a fist. He almost snarls at the man. “You are dismissed.”

Stephan chuckles. “Your Highness does not possess the rank to dismiss me.” His gaze darts to mine for a moment. “And this woman—”

“Doctor.” Leo almost growls the word. “Has she not requested that you address her by her title—?”

“I am under no obligation to address her by anything, Your Highness.” He smiles and tilts his head over toward me. “You have no objection to that, do you, Miss?”

“I…” I snap my mouth closed. I fucking well do have an objection to that, but I can tell he’s trying to upset me. It’s a little too convenient how he’s shown up right before my tea with the queen. He seems to know exactly what to do to get me riled up. And I’m not about to give him the satisfaction. “No, Stephan. Call me whatever you want. I think I’m going to start calling you Stevie. You have no objection to that, do you?”

“I… I…” He sputters the words. “I absolutely do object. My name is Stephan—”

“Hm.” I shrug and turn to walk down the hall. “I think I like Stevie better.”

I glance up at Leo and see his lips pressed into a line—he’s trying not to laugh.

Stephan huffs behind us as we speed down the corridor. “Yes, well, I wonder what a certain doctor would have to say about your impudence. Yes, let’s see… What was his name again? Doctor Kroll, I believe…”

I stop walking and stare down the hallway before I turn slowly to face the man. “What did you say?”

Stephan grins. “Yes, I thought perhaps that name would be familiar to you, Miss.”

My heart pounds in my chest and I glare at him for a moment before I lift my chin. “You have no right—”

“Oh, I have every right, Miss. My only objective is to protect His Royal Majesty, King Edmund. Your presence here is shameful at best. And potentially damaging to His Majesty at worst.”

“You’re trying to upset me before I see the queen. I know what you’re doing, Stevie. And believe me—”

“Elle.” Leo interrupts. He’s frowning and the line between his brows is as deep as I’ve ever seen it. “What is he talking about?”

My frown matches his. “My little…incident in medical school.” I turn back to Stephan. “Which is why you’re refusing to call me Doctor, I take it?”

He shrugs. “It doesn’t seem appropriate.”

“Well, considering I retook that class the next summer—and passed my licensing exams the next year—it probably makes about, oh, I don’t know—zero difference.” I shrug. “I earned my title and my degree, regardless of how you feel about it.”

He smiles, staring at me for a long moment. “Shall we go and see Her Majesty? She’ll be waiting for you, Miss.”

Leo is almost trembling—his knuckles are white, his fist is clenched so tightly. He speaks through his clenched jaw. “How…how did you find out?”

“I heard you speaking with Her Highness, Princess Sophia some time ago. I did some research and it wasn’t very difficult to find out the name of Miss Parker’s professor. Should news of your…relationship go public, it is only a matter of time before the world knows of Miss Parker’s behavior.” He glances between the two of us with a smug smile. “I would suggest that if you don’t want your father to know of your…companion’s indiscretions, you will see to it that she leaves the palace at once.” He motions down the hallway. “After she sees Her Majesty for tea, of course.”

My jaw drops a little and I turn to Leo. “You told your sister about that?”

His face turns a shade of red I can’t even name. “It was in confidence. I only told her…” His voice drops and he places a hand on my shoulder. “We can discuss this in private later, Elle. I’ll not be discussing anything in front of the weasel—”

“Prince Leopold was trying—rightly, I might add—to convince himself that he should not be pursuing you, Miss, when I overheard the conversation between His Highness and the Princess. I only took it upon myself to investigate further when he insisted upon bringing you here.”

I don’t even turn to look at Stephan. I can’t seem to tear my gaze from Leo’s. And my stomach is twisting in a way I don’t like at all—it almost feels like Leo has shoved a knife in it. And I’d wanted so much to believe that Stephan was the bad guy here…

Leo’s voice drops to slightly above a whisper and there is something pained in his expression. “I’m so sorry, Elle.”

I shake my head and finally look away from him as I pull my hand from his. I blink back the tears I hadn’t realized were starting to swim in my eyes.

I have a fucking tea to attend, after all.

* * *

I wish I could pay more attention to everything else in the room. Under normal circumstances, I would be standing up, looking at the artwork on the wall. Examining the—clearly antique—trinkets on the fireplace. Trying to drink in and remember every detail about this room.

Especially now—now that it seems like this might be the one and only time I’m ever in this particular room. The queen’s drawing room is elegant in a different way than the other rooms I’ve been in so far. It’s regal, like everything else I’ve seen here. But there’s something much more personal about this room and the way it’s decorated. Each item seems to have an intimate meaning for her.

Whatever Stephan knows about me, it’s pretty clear he hasn’t told the queen. Yet. Though I suspect my prior indiscretions may be the reason Leo has been called to a meeting with his father and Andrew. They have to figure out what to do with the wanton harlot, no doubt.

She pours my tea, smiling. “How are you finding Montovia so far, Elle?”

I’m trying to remember the rules Leo taught me this morning. I pour some of the milk into my cup and stir my tea with the little spoon, careful not to touch the sides with it. I pull out the spoon and set it back next to my saucer. So far, so good.

I return her smile. “I haven’t seen very much of it so far, Your Majesty—”

“Please. After all this time, I still find it awkward to be called by my title in social situations. It’s easier to tolerate during formal affairs, particularly when Edmund is so fond of being fussed over.” She grins and looks down to take a sip from her own cup. She looks back over at me as she sets her cup down. “Please call me Penelope.”

“Okay.” I force a smile, already thinking about how I’m going to try to avoid using her name or title altogether.

She holds the tray of sandwiches out to me and I take one. She does the same and sets the tray back down on the fancy silver platter-thing that’s been set up at the table.

She takes another sip of her tea and smiles at me again. “I suppose you are fairly nervous. I still remember the first time I took tea with Edmund’s mother. It was ages ago, but it still seems like yesterday.” She chuckles. “That woman…” She sighs a little, shaking her head. “She was a little less enlightened than Edmund, if that gives you some idea.”

I can’t help but grin. I take another sip of my tea, careful to only look down at my cup as I drink.

“Leo is quite taken with you, Elle. I hope you don’t mind my saying so. I’ve never seen my son like this. So…happy.”

I nod and look down into my cup again. Something about holding the warm china in my hands is almost comforting. And I’m not shaking quite as much as I was at first—hopefully I’m a little less likely to drop the damned thing. But thinking about the possibility makes me set it back down on its saucer. And of course, none of this is helped by the memory of what happened with Stephan a few minutes ago.

“Are you, Elle?”

I look over at her. “Am I…what?” My heart starts to pound in my chest. I’m sure I must have missed part of the question—and sure that she’s bringing up the damned thing about medical school again. I never should have opened my fucking mouth about that… I still don’t understand why I have that tendency to run off at the mouth. Why I can’t just shut up and keep my secrets to myself.

At least I’m an open book, I guess, not that it’s doing me much good at the moment.

“Happy?” Her smile falls a little and there’s something in her expression that I can’t read. “I hope you don’t mind my asking. I realize it’s quite…forward.”

“Oh.” I look down at the sandwich on my plate, realizing I’m going to have to actually eat the damned thing—wasn’t that one of the rules? I have to eat whatever I take? I’m pretty sure it was, and I pick up the tiny sandwich and cram the entire thing into my mouth. I don’t even realize I’ve forgotten to take tiny bites the way I’m supposed to until I’m swallowing the damned thing.

The queen only smiles and takes another sip of her tea—she either didn’t notice my rudeness or she’s ignoring it. Either way, I think I love her for not saying anything.

I take a deep breath. “I…I think I could be. Happy.” I grab my cup and take another sip of the warm liquid. I suppose I should have said could have been, but we don’t need to talk about that right now.

She nods. “I’m very pleased to hear that, Elle.” She sips at her tea and I realize she’s breaking one of Leo’s rules—she’s watching me while she’s doing it.

I look down—I have no idea what that means. If she’s challenging me or something. Whatever it is, it’s making me uncomfortable. I’m trying so hard to remember all the little things—crossing my ankles. Not swearing. Not shoveling food into my mouth—okay, I totally failed at that one. But I’m trying.

She sets her cup down again and holds out the second tray to me—the scones. I take one and I feel heat rise in my cheeks. I try to push away the memory of Leo feeding them to me this morning before everything else happened.

“Our scone chef is one of the best in the world. Edmund is quite fond of his scones.” She smiles. “You’ll have to meet him—remind Leopold to introduce you. Nigel is quite a character.”

“Leo mentioned that.” I spoon some of the raspberry preserves onto my scone before biting into it.

“Hm.” She smiles, staring at me for a moment. “Have you thought about your future here, Elle? About what you might want to do?”

I gulp down my bite a bit too quickly and start to cough. I take a quick sip of my tea. “My…future?” I almost croak the words.

She nods. “Your role in the kingdom. Leo’s role, of course, is that of the second son. I’m sure he’s explained that to you. That he is required to learn all that Andrew has.” She gives me a slight shrug. “No one wants to discuss such matters aloud, of course. But as I’m sure Leo has told you, Edmund himself was the second son—”

“No.” My jaw drops slightly when I realize I’ve interrupted the queen. I sink into my chair a little, almost disgusted with myself. My voice drops. “No, he hasn’t mentioned that.”

She nods. “I imagine he hasn’t wanted to trouble you with his responsibilities. Come to think of it, he hasn’t much wanted to trouble himself with his responsibilities.” She smiles again. “But he’s home again and he seems to be finally accepting his role in the monarchy. Of course, we’ll find a suitable role for you, as well. When you’ve married—”

“Whoa. I don’t think anything like that has been…” I stop talking when I see her smile fall away. “I mean… I don’t know what I mean. I guess I just mean that there is no proposal on the table or anything. And I have a life in America. This is my first time even being in Europe, and I’ve only been here two days. I haven’t really been considering a future here…”

I can see by the expression on her face that I’ve said too much, just like I knew I would. At least I haven’t said fuck or shit. I don’t think I have, anyway.

She sets her cup down and folds her hands in her lap. “Has Leo mentioned to you that I, too, am not of noble blood?”

My heart is racing in my chest. I stare at her for a moment. “No. Leo hasn’t mentioned much of anything about Montovia to me.”

She laughs. “I can’t say I’m surprised. Grateful, though, that he seems to have given up the celebrity lifestyle that he had grown so fond of. I’m not sure what he ever saw in living like that.” She shakes her head for a moment, chuckling. “But that’s neither here nor there. I’m just pleased beyond measure that he’s found someone to love.” She tilts her head. “And someone who loves him back…?”

The fact that what she’s just said came out as a question is not lost on me.

She holds out the pastry tray to me and I take one of the raspberry-filled ones that I had this morning. She smiles and takes one of the same, setting it on her plate before she continues. “As I said, when Edmund and I met, we were in much the same situation as you and Leopold. He was the second in line for the throne and his marriage to me—well, it didn’t please his parents, I can tell you that much. Not that I’m not quite pleased with Leo’s choice in you as a companion. You seem positively delightful, Elle. I think we are all going to get on quite well.”

My mouth opens a little, but I can’t say anything for a moment. I take a sip of tea and set the cup back down. “Forgive me for saying so, Your Majesty—”

“Penelope.”

“Yes, right. I don’t mean any disrespect, I really don’t, but…” Fuck, I don’t even know how to say this. “Leo and I—it’s really new. I mean, I know it’s been a few months since we met, but we don’t know each other all that well. I’m still not sure how I even came to be here. And if someone had told me a few days ago that I’d be having tea with the fuhhh—” Holy shit, I almost said it. “With a queen…” I’m not sure I recovered in time, though her expression doesn’t change. “I don’t think I would have believed it.”

She grins. “I appreciate your candor, Elle. I think that’s one of the many things Leopold appreciates about you, too. He’s spoken with me at great length about you. And despite everything—despite your differences, if it is meant to be, it will certainly work out.” She reaches over and covers my hand with hers. “I can’t see into the future any better than anyone else. But I know my son. I know he loves you. And more often than not, love itself is enough.”

I stare down at her hand for a long moment before lifting my gaze to meet hers. “I don’t know if I can.”

She tilts her head. “You don’t know if you can what, Elle?”

“Love him.”

She smiles at me for a long moment. “If I believed that, you wouldn’t be sitting here with me now.”

I shake my head a few times. “I’m going to hurt him.”

She shakes her head, too, but her smile never falls. “Are you certain that’s what you’re afraid will happen?”

My heart pounds in my chest again and I frown. I had no idea I was so transparent. And maybe I’m not—maybe she just has some ability to see through the bullshit that even I can’t see.

She pats my hand before she pulls it away and takes another bite of her pastry. “Would you like to know what I think, Elle?”

I nod.

She smiles before she takes a last sip of her tea. “I think you already love my son. Or you would have never stepped onto his plane to begin with.”

“I… He… I didn’t know I was going to get on his plane until I did—”

“But you did.”

I press my lips together. “Yes.”

She grins. “Yes. And he has told you?”

My brow furrows. “Told me?”

“That he loves you?”

I nod. “Yes.”

Her smile falls slightly and she stares at me for a long moment. “You aren’t afraid of hurting my son, Elle. You’re afraid that he is going to hurt you.”

I don’t know how to tell her it’s too late for that.

He’s already hurt me.

* * *