I knew Cam agreed to dinner because he was as tired of being cooped up as I was, but the second the thought crossed my mind, I planned to make the most of it.

I'd never really done things in a proper order. I didn't go out with my first boyfriend in high school until after I'd jacked him off in a secluded corner of the PE field. I jumped straight into a career where some guys expected me to be a porn star who'd show up, get naked, and get down to fucking. No foreplay. No introductions. Nothing.

Over the years I'd settled into a routine where I got to know my clients beforehand, but it wasn't anything like proper courtship. It wasn't meant to be. And now with Cam...

We'd gone out to eat a few times as friends. I'd teased him, flirted with him, and sometimes he'd flirted back. But I'd never counted those as actual dates. Now--after I knew what his cum tasted like on the back of my tongue--I'd figured out a way to get him to agree to a date. Mostly by not telling him that's what it was going to be.

It was silly, and as I got ready to go, I felt like I was sixteen again. There'd been something so magical back then about going out with a guy, showing the world he was mine. The situation with Cam might have been different, but I couldn't let go of what he'd said to me when he lay beside me. He wanted me. He wanted this. He was just afraid to have it.

With nothing else to do, I'd had a lot of time to think, and I knew I wanted him, too. I had no idea how we were going to figure it out, or what would happen once I went back to work, but I was tired of dancing around something that had been building between us for years.

Cameron McCabe was mine. He knew it. I knew it. It was about time everybody else realized that fact, too.

So I twisted his arm until he agreed to let me choose the restaurant, and then I called ahead to get us a table, with a nice bottle of house wine ready to go when we got there. When we got ready to go, I picked out an outfit I knew he liked. A dark, almost velvety shirt with a slim-fitting blazer that highlighted the taper of my waist and made my tailored pants look even better on my ass.

When I stepped out of the guest bedroom, hair perfectly coiffed, Cam's eyes were immediately drawn to me, and the sudden flare of heat in them was more than enough confirmation that he liked what he saw. I almost felt his gaze like a frenzied caress as his eyes roved over me from top to bottom. It was nearly enough to make me cancel our dinner plans altogether and see where the night led from the privacy of his apartment.

But I just winked at him and all but skipped out of the apartment.

"Should I change or something? What the hell kind of place did you book?" he asked, gesturing to his black button-down shirt and dark blue jeans.

"Up to you. But let's be real, you could probably show up in a tube top and look better than ninety percent of the people there."

Cam scoffed, seeming almost embarrassed as he retreated into the bedroom. A short time later he came out wearing a black blazer that was just a shade darker than his shirt. The jeans remained, but he'd traded his work boots for a pair of dressier shoes. It was somehow the perfect mix of function and style, and very, very Cam. So much so I had a hard time not crossing the room to him. I wanted to slide my hands over the seam of that shirt and just tear into him like he was a present on Christmas morning.

Tearing my gaze away, I managed to make it out to the parking lot without mauling him. I set up the GPS on my phone and shoved it into the vent dock Cam had in his truck, still not bothering to tell him where we were actually going. When the voice told him to turn into El Gaucho, he shot me a look.

"Seriously? I can't afford this place. It's like twenty bucks for a salad here," he grumbled.

"Okay, first off, if all you get is a salad I will order every single thing on the dessert menu and eat it in front of you," I shot back. His brows scrunched together in that cute bulldog way. "Second, it's on me, so don't worry about the cost."

"I'm not letting you pay for my dinner, Noah."

"Oh, I see what this is. You can't be seen letting the femme guy pay, right?"

"That's not what I--" he started, and I very nearly bit the inside of my cheek.

"What's next? Men letting women pull out chairs for them? Society as we know it will crumble!"

I laid it on thick, just so there wasn't any mistaking the fact that I'd been fucking with him the whole time. Cam caught on and smirked, rolling his eyes skyward.

"Asshole."

"Maybe after, if you're good," I said sweetly, a shiver running through me as Cam's gaze turned liquid.

He looked for a place to park, but I pointed out the valet area. Partially to tweak him, and partially for the reaction on the valet's face when we pulled up with Cam's busted up old truck in a sea of luxury cars and SUVs. I wasn't disappointed. The valet looked the vehicle over like it was some kind of alien craft, and I had a hard time holding my laughter in as Cam passed over the keys. Grudgingly, of course.

As we made our way inside and I gave our reservation confirmation to the host, I started to feel a little more at ease. Growing up, my family rarely ate out, and never at a place like this. My dad was always a stickler about not doing things we didn't need, to the point where whenever we did eat outside of the house, he'd hand-select everything for us, order water for everyone--as long as it was free--and demand the check before they could "push" dessert on us.

As soon as I was making my own money, I went out to eat at least once a week. There was a lot of guilt at first, but it wasn't a waste to spend money on myself; to treat myself to a nice meal. And it definitely wasn't a waste to bring Cam along, because I was seriously going to earn back the price of admission just in how funny it was to watch his eyes bug out of his head.

"This is too much," he whisper-hissed as the host led us to a table in the back room.

Everything was nicely lit by chandeliers that cast dim light over the tables below, but the room where we were led also featured candles on the tables, adorning a fresh centerpiece. I was tempted to pull out Cam's chair for him, just to see how he might react, but it was probably best not to poke the bear any more than I already had.

"Too much for whom?" I asked, settling into my own seat.

"For anybody. I feel like I'm about to be propositioned. Next thing I know you're going to tell me you'll pay my rent if I agree to go to some fancy business party with you."

I grinned wide, trying to imagine what kind of fancy business parties I'd ever get invited to. "You don't have to be my arm candy," I assured him. "We can make some other arrangement."

Cam's gaze was a mix of heat and hesitation. I knew what he was thinking. This was the kind of thing I did. I let clients wine and dine me for the privilege of getting into my pants. But that wasn't what was happening with Cam.

The tuxedo-clad waiter made his way to our table with the bottle of wine ready to go, and after a few more grumbles, Cam seemed to figure out that I wasn't going to back down on this. He ordered the peppercorn New York strip steak, and I decided to order the same thing, with a side of baked mac and cheese for us to share, because what was a night of excess if you couldn’t indulge in seven kinds of cheese?

After enjoying my food--and a hefty amount of wine--I finally figured out how to approach the topic I'd been grappling with since that day I finally felt his mouth on my body. I knew instantly I wanted more of that, but Cam was always the barrier.

"I lied earlier," I admitted, lifting my wine glass to my lips.

Cam looked at me in dubious concern, swallowing down a bite of steak. "About what? Being my sugar daddy?"

"Oh, I'm not cut out for the role of daddy," I said with a wink. "I'm way too rebellious for that. I'd make a much better boy, if you're willing to show me a firm hand."

I thought I heard him groan, but that could have been my imagination. What I hadn't imagined was the attention of an elderly woman who looked one naughty suggestion away from clutching her pearls. I just waved at her, wiggling my fingers as I gave her a salacious grin. That at least got her to look away.

"I do have a proposition," I said, schooling my features and shoring up the defenses around my heart. "I know you think we’d never work out, but maybe it doesn't have to be as complicated as you're trying to make it."

"Noah..."

"I like spending time with you. I like making you calm the hell down and just laugh every once in a while. But--let's be real," I leaned over the table to whisper. Some things didn't need to be overheard by little old ladies, "I also like making you come so hard you almost black out."

That time I definitely didn't imagine the groan. He looked at me with fire in his bright blue eyes, like he planned to devour me the same way he'd devoured his steak.

"I can't..."

"You can't do a relationship, and neither can I. I'm not asking you to hand over all your baggage, Cam. Keep it if you need to, and I'll keep mine. But we should be free to spend our time however we want." I rapped my knuckles just below my breastbone. "I'll be healed up soon, and even before that happens, I can think of plenty I want to do with and to you."

Honestly a big part of me wanted to crawl underneath the table, undo his fly, and take his thick cock into my mouth until he couldn't take it any longer. Barring that, a quick trip to the bathroom would do nicely. I'd had my ass stretched open in places far worse than this, by far lesser men. We might get thrown out, but it would be worth it. I knew it would.

"So just... physical?"

My heart flinched at that word and the way he said it. I knew that wasn't all he wanted from me. It wasn't all I wanted from him, either, but we'd both have to make do. Because kissing him, touching him, experiencing him sounded a lot better than never getting the chance.

"Friends with benefits. Anything we do together, it'll be in that moment, just between us. Outside of that, we live our normal lives."

Cam sucked in a breath, and I could imagine what he was thinking. My normal life involved fucking other men. Was I worth it to him? I was choosing him. Concocting some insane way to be with him and act like it wouldn't matter to me beyond the physical; like we wouldn't grow closer every time. But at the end of the day, the ball was in Cam's court.

"If we do this," my heart leapt into my throat. He wasn't saying no, "it can't affect anything else. I don't want to lose you as a friend, Noah, and your information is way too important to Grizz to not have you as an informant."

"Just us," I agreed, my heart threatening to pound out of my chest.

Cam's gaze pinned me from across the table, and for a moment it seemed like it really was just us. The rest of the people, the entirety of the restaurant faded away. My blood caught fire in my veins, rushing downward to fuel my aching cock. I'd wanted this for so long--wanted him for so long--and now there was a way I could have him. Not in all the ways I wanted, but tonight... tonight was about indulgence.

"What are we still doing here, then?" he asked, his voice rough with want.

Dinner didn't last much longer. I couldn't focus on anything, couldn't taste the wine or the food when all I wanted to taste were Cam's lips on mine. I'd already started daydreaming about pulling him into a store room or finding some secluded place outside that would last just as long as we needed it to. I had a packet of lube and a condom ready to go. If he wanted all of me, I was more than ready to give it to him.

But somehow we managed to make it to the valet stand without tearing each other's clothes off. At least not physically. Every time Cam looked at me, I felt him undressing me with those sexy bedroom eyes of his. I'd never felt more wanted, and I knew there was no way we were making it back to his place before the dam broke. All that energy was too pent up between us, and the taste of release we'd had wasn't nearly enough.

I tipped the valet more than any sane person would and climbed into Cam's truck, my whole body vibrating with need. He slid in beside me, and the console was up far enough that I could just scoot closer to him on the bench, going as far as my seatbelt would allow.

I wasn't even able to wait for him to pull out of the parking lot before my hand slid over his thigh, his skin so incredibly warm beneath the fabric. "How quickly can you get back to your place?"

My breath tickled his ear and he shivered before I even connected my teeth with the lobe, biting down just enough to exert pressure. The pained growl that rumbled in his throat shot my dick straight from interested to painfully hard, and I shifted on the uncomfortable bench. My thigh brushed his, the sensation sending a pulse of lust through me that would have weakened my knees had I been standing.

"Not fast enough. But if you get any handsier I'm not going to make it out of this parking lot."

A devilish smile curved my lips and my hand moved inward from his thigh, my destination clear from the moment he said the words. My palm settled over the bulge in his jeans, my fingers curling around his dick. "So I shouldn't do this, then?"

"Fuck," he hissed, his hands tightening on the steering wheel.

I felt the muscles in his thigh tense and flex as he worked the pedals, his hand moving the stick with sharp jolts as I massaged him through his jeans. He breathed in and out through his nose, with the concentration of a man made of much stronger stuff than me. I wondered if it was something he'd developed overseas, but imagined this wasn't exactly how he came about his iron willpower.

Either way, my heart thumped loudly in my chest, my whole body tuned to Cam's. I was getting so wound up that it wouldn't take long for him to get me off, and I knew the same was true for him. All he had to do was park somewhere with a little bit of privacy, and we could work this problem out before heading back to his place to take care of things the right way.

When Cam pulled off the highway and onto a low-traffic side street, it looked like I was going to get my way. I stopped rubbing him, but kept my hand where it was, feeling all that delicious heat, just waiting for the moment he'd throw the truck in park and turn the tables. My whole body hummed in anticipation, and I bit my lip hard to keep myself grounded in the moment; patient and willing to let him do whatever he wanted to me.

This was what I wanted--what I'd always wanted, and never got. Some of my clients used me. Some of them needed me to hold their hand. But I'd never been with a guy who took the reins not because he thought I was just his property to do with as he pleased, but because he was confident that he could handle what I needed.

I would've given everything for that. I know I'd said it was only physical, but I also knew it would be impossible for me not to get attached. That was a problem for future Noah, though. Present Noah was...

Seeing the headlights of a car that was way too close.

The shine of them caught my attention as they quickly filled up the rearview mirror. Where had that guy even come from? There was tons of space between us and the nearest car. We hadn't been close to anyone else since Cam pulled off the highway. But there he was, riding Cam's ass in a car that would've been flattened by the big truck.

My hand must have betrayed my tension, because Cam looked over at me. I saw the glare of the headlights reflect off his eyes, but when I looked again, they were gone. Street lamps were blocked out by a dark car as it sped around us, into the lane for oncoming traffic.

"Fucking asshole," Cam said, breathless.

I thought that would be the end of it. He'd speed around us and zoom up on the next person. But the car didn't seem to have an interest in passing us. It kept speed, even as Cam shifted gears. And while at first I thought it was a trick of my mind, it only took a few moments to convince myself that he was drifting closer and closer, crossing over the double line that separated the lanes.

I heard the contact before I ever felt it. Metal collided, scraping together. Cam's truck veered, the steering wheel tearing itself out of his hands as the car bore down on the side of his vehicle. A bend in the road came up on us all too quickly, and when the car dipped away from us only to drift closer again, I realized one paralyzing fact: We were about to be run off the road.