Chapter 10

“I’ll just be a minute,” I told Bella. “I’ll grab Camp and be right back.” I didn’t want her coming into my mom’s house and having my sister grill her. I knew how Charlie could be, and Bella didn’t have the armor to fend off barbs from my bitchy sister.

She gave me a smile. “Sure.”

We had barely slept the night before. Maybe two hours this morning. She looked tired, her face free of makeup, shadows under her eyes. But she didn’t seem upset. If anything, she exuded a sense of peace and calm. Like she knew she’d made the right decision even if her entire world had exploded. I reached out and tweaked her nose. “Be right back, pretty girl.”

Bella and I had talked easily in the middle of the night for hours, until the fire died down and the sun had risen. She wasn’t the entitled rich girl I had assumed she was. She wasn’t even the superficial material girl she seemed like she could be. She was exactly what I had thought she was—sweet and kind. But she was also intelligent and thoughtful and passionate.

Man, I had fucked up. I had thought I could just have sex with her and be done with it. Things were getting way too complicated already and it had only been a day.

I went inside my mom’s house and spotted my son in his high chair. “Hey, buddy!”

He gave me a grin, his mouth smeared in oatmeal.

“Hey,” I said to my sister, who looked tired. “Where’s Mom?”

“Church. It’s Sunday.”

I lifted Camp up and hugged him to me. There was just something about his baby smell and the weight of him in my arms that made life worth living. He was awesome. I started pacing the kitchen, just so I could bounce him up and down and see him smile. “I’m taking Camp for the day.”

“Where are you going?” Charlie sipped her coffee, her hair sticking up.

“The camp. I’m staying there with Bella.”

Charlie choked on her coffee. “Dude, are you insane?” she squawked at me. “There is a missing person’s report out on that girl! Her dad is a fricking billionaire and her fiancé is a lawyer.”

I couldn’t exactly argue that I wasn’t being stupid. Because I was. “Why the hell would they file a missing person’s report? I didn’t kidnap her. She texted me asking me to pick her up. So I did.”

“And you hid her in the woods and screwed her.” Charlie rubbed her temples. “Oh my God. I’m going to have a father and a brother in prison and another one in rehab. This is just great.”

That annoyed me. I stopped pacing. “I didn’t do anything illegal. And neither did she. She’s an adult. Walking out on your wedding isn’t a crime. Now get me some of your clothes for her to wear. All she has is a wedding dress.”

“I think that makes me an accessory.”

“To what? What crime did Bella commit? Failure to yield to a dickhead? Aggravated assault on a wedding veil? Illegal possession of crystals?”

This was all fucking ludicrous.

Despite herself, Charlie cracked a smile. “You’re having a lot of fun with those, aren’t you?”

“Yes.” I shrugged. “I helped a friend if that’s what you want to call it. Bella’s family is out of control if they’ve involved the cops. This is all an overblown misunderstanding.”

There was a knock on the door. We both froze. I don’t know why. But given what Charlie had just told me my first reaction was that it was danger.

“What do we do?” Charlie whispered. She started to walk backward like she could disappear down the hallway.

“Answer it,” I told her. “Bella is in the car. We have to get rid of whoever it is.” Bella was my concern. I wasn’t worried about me.

“I hope it’s a guy cop,” she murmured. “I can get them to do what I want.”

And she thought the men in our family were the fucked-up ones? I rolled my eyes as she fluffed her chest by yanking on her bra straps.

But when she pulled the door open, me hanging back in the kitchen, I saw it was Bella.

“Sorry to interrupt,” she said. “But it’s very hot in the car. Can I come inside and get a glass of water?”

“Sure,” Charlie said, her voice flat. She opened the door wide, turned, and left Bella standing in the doorway.

“Sorry,” I said when Bella stepped into the living room. “I didn’t think I was going to be this long. I’ll get you some water.” I shot Charlie a death stare. “Charlie, this is Bella. Bella, this is my sister, Charlie.”

“It’s so nice to meet you,” Bella said, holding her hand out.

Charlie snorted. “Christian says you need to borrow my clothes. Sorry they aren’t designer. And my boobs and hips are bigger than yours so I’m not sure how this is going to work, but I’ll find you sweats or something.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”

“Whatever.”

“Charlie,” I snarled at my sister. “Don’t be a dick.”

But she was unmoved. She was nothing like our mother in personality. She was like her father. The real one. Not the one she thought she had.

Sometimes I wanted to tell her, especially when she got like this. But I just couldn’t do that to her. How did you explain to your sister that she was the result of your mother having an affair with a rich guy while her husband was in prison? You didn’t. Though I was tempted when she got all high and mighty about “rich bitches” to blow the lid off and point out her biological father was exactly that. A rich bitch.

But I never did.

Charlie just walked away with a parting shot of, “I’m not the one with a son to lose custody of.”

That was a direct hit. I winced. I couldn’t help it. Bella saw it.

“What does she mean? Are you in a custody dispute?”

“Nope. Not at all. Ali is in town, as you know, but she hasn’t asked to see Camp.” I played it off. I sounded confident. But there was a trigger of fear that had started to pull back with Charlie’s warnings and I didn’t like it. I couldn’t lose Camp. That would kill me. I couldn’t have him subjected to Ali’s apathy.

I reminded myself this was temporary, this time with Bella. I couldn’t take on her problems and she couldn’t take on mine. And neither of us wanted that anyway.

Bella chewed on her bottom lip. Her hair still looked overdone for a casual Sunday. All those curls were intact, despite me keeping her in bed most of the afternoon the day before. Even her lips still looked stained. Money clearly bought some kick-ass makeup and hair.

She reached out and tickled Camp’s belly, giving him a smile. “Hi, little guy,” she whispered. Then she looked over at me with troubled eyes. “I don’t want you to get in trouble, Christian,” she said. “Maybe you should just take me to a hotel.”

“That’s probably a good idea,” Charlie agreed before I could speak.

I shot my sister a glare. “You don’t need to go to a hotel.” I handed Bella a glass of water.

“Well. Maybe I should just call my parents. I mean, I’m going to have to eventually.”

“Did you text them last night that you are okay?”

She nodded. “Yes. I don’t think they are worried about me so much as they are probably angry and upset.”

So she clearly didn’t know there was a missing person’s report filed on her. Though now I wondered if Charlie had just made that up. I watched Bella sip her water. “Do you want to go home? I can take you home right now if that’s what you really want.”

There was a touch of both panic and passion in her eyes. “No. I don’t. I want to stay with you.”

If I had to label what I felt right then, I guess I would call it satisfaction. “Then you’re staying with me.”

Even if it was stupid. Even if my gut clenched when she reached out to hold Camp and he readily moved into her arms. Even if I felt shit I had no business feeling when she cooed to my son and looked every inch a woman who should be a mother.

“Can I talk to you for a second?” Charlie asked. “In my room?”

“Sure.” I followed her, knowing exactly what she was going to say. “Save your breath,” I told her once we were out of earshot of Bella. “I know this is stupid.”

“If you know it’s stupid, why are you doing it?” Her normally snappish voice was soft and filled with concern. Her eyes held worry.

That unnerved me a little. Charlie was an unemotional badass. She didn’t worry. “I don’t know,” I told her honestly. “I really don’t. But I can’t stop myself.”

“Tell her she has to call her family. Like, now. So they chill out.” She turned and dug in her dresser and pulled out some shorts and a T-shirt. “Here. Just, seriously, be careful.”

“This isn’t a big deal,” I told her. “So she bailed on her wedding, so what? Don’t people do that all the time?”

“It happens. But it doesn’t mean you should roll around in other people’s mud with them.”

That made me grin. “Damn, sis, you don’t know me then. I’m all for rolling in mud.”

“I know. Which is why you’re an idiot.”

“I’m not going to argue with you there.” I took the clothes from her. “Thanks. I’ll make sure you get them back.” I was trying to be nonchalant, but Charlie had given me a touch of fear. Ali didn’t like Bella. If she found out Bella was with me she was not going to be thrilled. “I’ll be back later today.”

When I got back into the living room Bella was on the floor with Camp, reading him a book. It made me want to punch a hole in the wall. I wanted that for my son, damn it. I wanted him to have a mother. And whose fault was it that he didn’t? Mine.

I didn’t know how to make that up to him.

I couldn’t. But that was also the reason I couldn’t date right now. I couldn’t bring someone into his life who would disappear. He had already suffered through that in losing his mother. That was why I stayed casual with women.

It didn’t explain why I was handing Bella clothes to wear and ushering her and Camp into my car like we were a family going for a fucking day at the park.

Maybe Bella had planned a fantasy wedding, but what would we call this?

Stupid. That’s what I called it.

---

Camp was the sweetest, quietest little baby I had ever seen. He watched his father and me with wide, intelligent eyes. He didn’t laugh when I played patty-cake with him. Instead he kept reaching for my face, like he was on to me. Which he probably was. He obviously wasn’t a nine-month-old, he was double that. But it was easy to mistakenly think he was younger because he didn’t talk much. Or maybe he was just solemn. He had the words but didn’t care to use them.

I imagined this was what Sophie was like as a baby. Intelligent, watchful. Quiet. Serious.

I wanted to coax as many smiles from him as I could.

Christian was grilling us burgers back at the cabin for lunch and I was sitting in the same chair as the night before, Camp on my lap. I was tired from lack of sleep but I felt oddly serene. I didn’t even mind that I was hiding out and should be taking advantage of this time to have sex with Christian and instead we were entertaining his son.

It was like I had dumped every worry and fear from my head and was living someone else’s life. Just for a minute. It was bliss.

“You seriously want two burgers?” Christian asked me as he expertly flipped the patties on the grill.

“Yes. I’m starving.” I couldn’t get over how hungry I was. I was making up for lost time, clearly. “I can’t wait to eat meat. I mean, other than chicken and fish. I’ve been eating lean for…forever.” I couldn’t remember the last time I had a burger with a bun; probably my senior year in college.

“Did you ever think maybe life should be about balance?” Christian loaded a burger onto a bun and then a plate. He made quick work of putting the remaining three on the plate, which he carried across the yard. “They’re ready.”

“You think my life isn’t balanced?” I stood up, stroking Camp’s soft cheek. He made happy sounds and reached out to touch my necklace. It was a horseshoe. Just a tiny delicate silver piece my father had given me for my sixteenth birthday. It had been in my overnight bag, intended for me to wear on the plane to Bora Bora for good luck. I had found it and put it on.

“No, I do not think going eleven years without a doughnut is a balanced life.” He opened the door for me. “Or years without beef. And no, that is not an innuendo.” He winked at me as we sat at the table to eat.

That made me laugh.

The burger was heaven. No question about it. It was like an explosion of flavor, the meat tender and juicy. “Oh my God.” I handed Camp a French fry from the pile Christian had baked in the oven. “Here you go, baby. Don’t be like me. Don’t deny yourself.”

Camp crammed it into his mouth without hesitation. It must be nice to be guilt-free.

“Again. Balance.” Christian took a bite of his burger and nodded. “Damn, I’m the grill master. This is good.”

That made me roll my eyes. “Modest too.”

Christian put down his burger and frowned. “Is that a car pulling in?”

I froze and listened. There was the distinct sound of tires on gravel. “Yes. I think so. Is it your brother?”

“If it is, I’m going to murder him. This is the last night I can really stay here with you. I want to enjoy it.”

I knew that Christian wouldn’t be able to stay with me more than a few days, but hearing him say it out loud, so casually, bothered me. I didn’t want to think about reality, but I had to. “Should I go, uh, strip the bed?”

Christian grinned. “I forgot about that. Let’s see who it is first.”

We both stood up.

Unfortunately, it was not Christian’s brother. It was my father. He saw me as he was stepping out of the car and just shook his head. “What are you doing?” he asked me. “Everyone has been worried sick about you. No one knew where the hell you were!”

Dad looked tired, but mostly annoyed. He was wearing khakis and a golf shirt, his Sunday uniform.

“I sent you a text,” I said, feeling a little defensive. “I told you I was fine. I called Bradley.”

“For the record, Bradley Alexander can go to hell.” Dad slammed the door shut. “That kid is not who I thought he was. I don’t appreciate his behavior yesterday.”

I didn’t even want to know what he had done, but I imagine it had something to do with the boozing and the boob pics he had posted. That was validating. “Right? Daddy, he’s got something wrong with him, seriously. I think he’s a pathological liar or a narcissist or something.”

“Or both.” Dad eyed Christian, who was holding Camp and frowned. “Aren’t you the tent guy?”

That made me want to wince. God, sometimes my father was so unintentionally pretentious. And other times he meant to be pretentious. But this time I don’t think he was going for ironic. He had just convinced himself Christian was someone we had hired.

“No. I am not the tent guy. I’m Christian Jordan. My brother Cain is dating Sophie.”

Dad’s eyebrows shot up. “Sophie isn’t dating anyone. And you’re doing what exactly with Bella?”

My father was intimidating. He hadn’t earned his money by backing down. A lot of men would have looked away or fumbled over their words under that hard stare. But Christian looked perfectly at ease. He never broke eye contact.

“I’m giving her a place to stay for a few days.”

My father actually just nodded. I had expected him to be more inquisitive.

“So, Dad, how did you know I was here?”

“The GPS on your phone. For the record, honey, don’t ever try to fake your own death. You wouldn’t get very far.” He actually looked kind of amused.

“Oh, right, my phone.” That I had thrown into the woods. “I wasn’t trying to disappear. I just needed to be alone. But I’m okay. And I’m sorry about everything. Honestly. I thought I could do it.” Just saying that made my throat constrict. “And then I couldn’t.”

He nodded. “I know. It’s okay. All I want is for you to be happy.”

I wasn’t sure what else to say. This was awkward. My father didn’t seem pissed off at me. I wasn’t sure what he was feeling or thinking. Then I had a thought. “Oh, Daddy, hang on. I have something for you.” I started running down the path to the caboose.

I heard my dad say, “Where the hell is she going?”

“I have no idea,” Christian said.

I dashed into the dim interior and glanced at the rumpled sheets and the sex toys. I would die if my father followed me in here, so I grabbed my engagement ring and left immediately. Slightly breathless, I returned to the driveway and held it out for him. “Here. My ring from Bradley. You can sell it and keep the money. It should help pay for some of the wedding bills.”

He took the ring from me and gave me a long look. “Why don’t I hold on to it for a while? You might decide you want it later.”

“For what?” I asked, astonished.

“The money.”

I shrugged. I didn’t want Bradley’s blood money. “No, thanks. You should keep it. So it’s not a total waste.”

“Just a warning, Bradley went to Boston last night but he’s coming back tomorrow to take care of some business.”

“What business?” Everything related to the wedding had been handled by the wedding planner and my parents. The thought of running into him made me cringe.

“He bought you a house here as a surprise and I think he plans to just put it right back on the market so he doesn’t lose the summer selling season.”

“He bought you a house?” Christian asked. “Damn, that’s a wedding gift.”

For some reason it embarrassed me. It also ticked me off. “You know what, if you think about it, not only was it his way to keep me happy without having to be monogamous, it’s kind of rude to pick out a house without consulting me. What, my opinion doesn’t matter?” The whole thing seriously annoyed me. “A bracelet is a surprise. Earrings. Even a vacation. Not a house. It’s just a way to control me.”

“Not anymore,” Christian said.

I smiled at him. “Yep. Not anymore.” Then I went over to my father and wrapped my arms around him. So he wasn’t a hugger. So what. I was. Why did I let him intimidate me still? He did love me. There was no question about that, and it was high time I made it clear that even though I was his daughter I was an adult. I wanted to be treated with respect, not patronized.

So I was going to hug him even if it made him uncomfortable. Even if he resisted.

Surprisingly, he didn’t. He hugged me back, tightly. Then he pulled away and eyed me. “I sorry if what I said to you last week influenced your decision to go ahead with the wedding. I feel like if I had kept my mouth shut, you would have called it off sooner and we could have avoided the whole wedding day fiasco. I thought I was doing the right thing.”

That meant a lot to me. “I know. Thanks, Daddy. I can’t really say what I would have done. It was just so awful and confusing. So don’t feel bad.”

He nodded and cleared his throat. Then he glanced over at Christian. “So this is your son?” he asked him, clearly wanting to change the subject.

“Yes. His mother left when he was three months old.”

I felt like Christian said that so my father would know he wasn’t being unfaithful.

“That’s a shame. I’m sorry to hear it. Some women aren’t cut out to be mothers. My daughter Sophie might be that person.” My father jerked his thumb at me. “This one will be fantastic at it.”

This was literally the world’s most uncomfortable conversation. I wasn’t sure if he was warning Christian I might attach or he was endorsing it. Either way I was standing there barefoot with no makeup just a few feet away from the man I had let strip me naked after only knowing him for a few hours, really. And on my other side was my father. Awkward.

“Well, thanks, Dad.” I tucked my hair behind my ear. “I’ll be home tomorrow, okay?” Christian had to return to his regular life. I knew that. So I would go gracefully back to my own. I couldn’t hide forever.

Yet I was selfish enough to want just one more night.