ELIJAH CLOSED THE DISTANCE BETWEEN us in a few steps then backed me up against the counter. “Hello, Freckles.” He buried his hands in my hair and kissed me like he hadn’t seen me in days. “Damn, I like you in my space.”
My heart raced over his confession. I feared my presumptuous actions would have the reverse effect. Hell, it wasn’t that long ago that he completely flaked on me. Would he do it again once the case was over?
“I like being in your space, Elijah.” His stomach growled ferociously making me laugh. “Hungry?”
“Famished.” He turned loose of me to lift the lid off the containers. “Oh my God,” he said on a low groan. “Enchiladas, refried beans, and rice.”
“Dinner kind of went tits up, so I decided to bring leftovers ho… here to you.” I laughed nervously hoping he didn’t catch my slipup.
“What happened? How’d you get here? Your SUV isn’t in your driveway.”
“Well, I was too tipsy to drive, so Van dropped me off here. I’m not sure where to begin with how wrong our night went.”
“Start anywhere you want as long as you do it while we eat.”
“Deal,” I said, heaping food onto a plate and handing it to him.
We settled at the small table in the kitchen and Elijah practically dove into his food. I would’ve thought he was consuming it too fast to taste it, but his moans and groans said differently.
“Oh, Maegan. This is so damn good. I can’t get enough.”
Those were things he usually said when I had possession of his cock—either in my mouth or pussy—or he had his head buried between my legs. I was suddenly in the mood to push back from the table and throw myself at him. Only his obvious need to eat stopped me. Let the man refuel, Mae. He’s going to need it.
“God, who made this?”
“Vanessa made it,” I told him.
“Which one was she?” he asked before he shoveled another bite in his mouth.
“Why do you ask?”
Elijah’s head snapped up and he met my suspicious gaze with widened eyes. He shook his head. “Just curious.”
“It’s the one thing she knows how to make,” I told him. “A man can’t live on enchiladas every day.”
Elijah dropped his fork and wiped his mouth. He looked a little skittish. “I didn’t imply that I was going to ask her on a date or anything. I was just curious which of your friends made this dinner.”
“Which one of my lovely friends, you mean?”
“They are lovely women,” Elijah said. “I’m not going to pretend I didn’t notice.” He licked his lips nervously. “Are we fighting?”
I burst into laughter then because my reaction—or overreaction—was ridiculous. “No, Elijah. I’m sorry.”
“It must’ve been some night with your friends, Freckles.”
“You have no idea.” I told him about everything that happened at Vanessa’s house, minus the wedding talk, of course. “Then we all climbed into Vanessa’s car—she’s the tall brunette, by the way—and went over to Violet’s house.”
“Which one is Violet? I’m guessing that didn’t go well either?” he asked.
“Violet is the petite blonde with the pixie haircut.” It was clear he had no idea what kind of hairstyle I was talking about, but there was only one other blonde in the mix. “She wasn’t home or at her parents’ house either. We’re not sure where she went. She wouldn’t answer her phone.”
“So which one is the redhead and the shorter brunette?” he asked. “Sometimes people just need some quiet time to lick their wounds.”
“Candace is the redhead and April is the shorter brunette.” I tilted my head to the side and studied the gorgeous man who sat adjacent to me. “You sound like a man with experience,” I said softly. I was dying for him to tell me about the shadows I saw in his eyes from time to time.
“You can say that again,” Elijah replied. “Let me tell you about a naïve fool who trusted his heart to a woman who cheated on him with his brother while he was serving his country.”
I gasped. “No!”
“It happens a lot, Freckles. I just never thought Brandy would do that to me.” Elijah shook his head like he still couldn’t believe it. “Imagine the horror of finding my wife pregnant with my brother’s baby when I returned home. It not only destroyed my relationship with my brother and father, but has made my mom’s life hell.”
“I’m so sorry, Elijah.” I knew it had to be hard when your man went off to war, but on what planet was that an acceptable way to treat someone? “You do realize that their behavior is a reflection on their character, not your worth. Please tell me that you know that.”
Elijah nodded slowly. “It’s a recent epiphany.” A slow smile crept across his face. “Sitting here with you makes me glad that I wasn’t ready to trust again until now. I’m sure I met some real nice girls over the past ten years, but not a single one of them made me want to tear down the walls I built around my heart until you.”
“Me?” I asked pointing to my chest.
“You, Freckles.” He reached for my hand and brought it to his mouth. “You’re genuine and honest, loving, and so loyal to those you love. You keep a man on his toes without using manipulation to accomplish it. You make me want to believe in forever again.”
“Wow.” Hearing that was sweeter than any three-worded declaration.
“You wow the hell out of me, and I can’t believe that you’re still single. How the hell is that possible? That loser Clayton couldn’t be the only guy in this town interested in you.”
I’d already told Elijah about my biggest hang-up, but it was time I told him the entire story. “I told you that I couldn’t have kids, but I didn’t tell you why.” I released a shaky breath. “When I was seventeen, I developed a large bruise on my leg. At first, I thought I got it from playing soccer, but couldn’t recall an incident that would have caused it. Then it wouldn’t go away. I started feeling run-down and weak, so my mom took me to the doctor. They thought it was mono, but decided to do a blood panel to be sure nothing more serious was going on. I had leukemia, Elijah.”
“I’m sorry, Freckles.” He ran his hand over my hair again, then pulled me to him for a kiss.
“It was horrible, and I pray every night that I never know sickness like that ever again.” I offered him a smile because he looked so miserable on my behalf. “I wouldn’t trade the experience for the world though. Um, prior to that, my mother and I fought constantly. Nothing I did seemed good enough and I felt like she wanted me to be someone I wasn’t. That all changed when I got sick. She just wanted me to be healthy. She said it over and over, sometimes when she wasn’t aware that I heard her.” I took a deep, shaky breath so I wouldn’t cry. “I never want to put my parents and Milo through that kind of pain again. I used to think that not being able to have children was the end of the world. I think that the sting will always be there, but you helped me realize that I can have the life I’ve always wanted. I just have to go about it in a different way.”
“Did some dickhead say that you weren’t good enough because you couldn’t have kids?” he asked me.
“Not directly to my face, but there were whispers and rumors.” He looked like he was ready to rough someone up, so I covered his hands with my own. “You weren’t the only one with a recent epiphany. Maybe some of the guys I dated would’ve been okay with adopting kids, but I wasn’t willing to take a chance to find out.”
“Maegan, I’m beyond rusty at dating since I spent the last ten years trying to avoid it. I’m going to fuck up, piss you off, and probably drive you nuts at times, but I’m hoping that you’ll take a chance on me.”
“Well, how could I refuse with a ringing endorsement like that?” I asked. “I have one favor to ask.”
“Name it.”
“Please don’t start treating me like I’m made of fragile glass. Never stop dirty talking to me either. God, Elijah, it makes me crazy and melts my insides.”
“Yeah?” he asked eagerly. “You’re going to regret telling me that.”
“No, I don’t think that I will.” I smiled ruefully. “There’s a saying that men want a lady in their parlors and a harlot in their beds. I don’t think women are all that different. I like a gentleman in the parlor and a filthy-mouthed man in my bed.”
“Really?” Elijah didn’t sound too sure.
“I’m sure there are some women who won’t agree with me, but we don’t care about what pleases them. I prefer to hear all the things you want to do with my tits and cunt.”
Elijah blushed profusely, and I thought perhaps I’d gone too far, but he tossed me over his shoulder and hauled me upstairs to his bedroom where I practiced being his harlot while he put his filthy-fucking-mouth everywhere on my body. We both took what we wanted—immense pleasure from each other’s body. Although neither of us declared love to the other, there was no doubt that there was a deeper connection and meaning in everything we did together.
Much later, Elijah cradled me against him on the couch and told me about his day. I shook hard in his arms when he confirmed that Renzo most likely targeted me as one of his victims. My heart broke for Kayla and Jessica Hansen. I knew that we wouldn’t solve violence with more violence, but I couldn’t imagine the hell that Kayla had lived through. Was I capable of harming someone who hurt Milo or one of my friends like that? Yeah, I thought I could. I hoped like hell that I never had to test the theory though.
“I think it was the first time I hated arresting someone for the crime they committed,” Elijah said.
We sat together for a long time taking comfort from each other without talking. It was nice to know that we didn’t have to fill every second with chit chat. I glanced at the clock on the wall and was surprised at the late hour.
“I need to go home and get some sleep. It’s my turn to open Books and Brew tomorrow morning.”
“Stay here,” Elijah said, tugging on my hand when I got to my feet.
“I can’t. I think it’s best I go back to my own house so that you don’t get sick of me.”
Elijah pinned me with a dark look. “That’s not likely to happen, but you should probably make me court you properly.”
“Court me?”
“What’s wrong with that term?” he asked.
“Nothing if you’re a duke looking for a future duchess,” I teased. “We call it dating these days. I was thinking it’s best to ease you back into dating. Besides, you’ve had all of me, so it’s not like playing hard to get now would get me anything. And as you pointed out, I don’t play games.”
“I haven’t had all of you, Freckles. I need to earn that though.”
My face flushed hot when I realized what he meant. “Oh, honey. We ladies don’t give that up unless it’s for birthdays, anniversaries, or we’re trying to talk you into buying a new car.”
Elijah threw his head back and laughed heartily, causing me to place my hands on my hips. “I was talking about your heart, but it’s good to know what I can expect next week.”
“Next week?”
“It’s my birthday.” He waggled his eyebrows and rubbed his hands together gleefully like he was already picturing parting my ass cheeks and sliding his cock inside me.
I cupped his face in my hands and lowered my lips until they hovered above his. “You can stay over tomorrow night. I take Wednesdays off and I always make French toast and crispy bacon for breakfast.”
“Being your neighbor sure has perks that the landlord never told me about.”
“I might not be your neighbor much longer,” I told him.
“Where are you moving to?”
“This historical home is about to go on the market, and I’m pretty sure I can get it for a good price.”
“You’re not seriously thinking about buying that Scooby-Doo haunted house.”
“I will if I can get the price that I want and Andy tells me the renovations won’t exceed what I want to spend. Will you be too afraid to visit me if I do?”
“Can I pour a circle of salt around the bed?” Elijah countered. “There’s no ghost or ghoul that can keep me away from you, Freckles.”
“Dinner tomorrow?” I asked. “I make amazing spaghetti and meatballs.”
“I wouldn’t miss it.”
Elijah walked me and Lulu to our front door. The goodnight kiss he gave me was long, soft, and full of promise, longing, and so much hunger that I nearly changed my mind. I knew if we were going to do this right, then we needed our relationship to be healthy. That meant we needed to take a few steps back, possibly even start all over.
He took a step backward after our kiss ended. He smiled softly at me and said, “The lady rocked my world, but in all the right ways.”