London

Crewe didn’t come back to the room at his regular time. Even when dinner was served, he still didn’t show up. I knew he had a lot of work to catch up on, but I was surprised he hadn’t popped in for at least a visit.

I started to get worried.

I hadn’t shown my face to the rest of the castle because I knew everyone hated me. If I ran into Ariel in the hallway, nothing good would come from it. None of the men would touch me, but Dunbar would strangle me with just his eyes.

But the later it got, the more concerned I became.

I didn’t have a cell phone to call him. My only option was to search for him in the castle. If I didn’t find him, one of his men would know where he’d disappeared to. I put on a pair of jeans and a sweater and walked downstairs. The first person I came across was Dimitri, the man who took Dunbar’s place when he’d been put on guard duty. He gave me a quiet scowl but didn’t say anything. His hands were held together at his waist, his gun on his hip. He didn’t draw his weapon or insult me, but his eyes did enough damage on their own.

I walked into Crewe’s office and found it vacant. His laptop was closed and everything was neat and tidy, like he hadn’t used it at all. I took a look around to see if he left any clues behind, but there was nothing.

I walked back outside and saw another guard in the hallway. He gave me the same derisive look as Dimitri and kept walking.

At least they wouldn’t touch me.

I walked to the front door where Dunbar stood. In dark jeans and a black jacket, he looked as deadly as Dimitri. He kept his arms over his chest like he had no intention of hurting me, but I wouldn’t push my luck. “I’m looking for Crewe. Do you know where he is?”

He stared at me in silence.

I knew I wasn’t going to get an answer out of him. “When I do see Crewe, I’ll let him know how accommodating you were.” I turned around and retreated, knowing Crewe would turn up sooner or later.

“He left a few hours ago.”

I turned around. “Where did he go?”

“He took the Jaguar and left on his own. I’m not sure where he went.”

He and Ariel must have gotten into a fight. “Can I call him from your phone?”

“Unlikely that he would answer.”

“Can I at least try?”

He sighed before he pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it over.

I found his name in the address book and hit send. I listened to it ring four times before Crewe finally answered.

“Yes?” The single word told me exactly how he was feeling. He was in a particularly bad mood. Something must have happened with Ariel today.

“It’s me.”

He sighed into the phone like my voice was displeasing to him.

“When are you going to be home?”

“Stop acting like my wife. I’ll be home when I feel like being home.”

He was definitely drunk. “A heads-up would have been nice.”

“Don’t owe you a damn thing.”

I could actually hear the sound of his glass hitting the hardwood table at the bar where he sat. Or maybe it was just part of my imagination. I didn’t want to start our new relationship like this, but I couldn’t let him talk to me that way. “We can do this in two different ways. You can be a real man and come home to me. You can tell me what you’re so pissed off about, and I can help you through it. Or you can keep acting like the biggest asshole on the planet and sleep alone tonight. Which path do you want to take?”

Silence.

“I’m hanging up, then.”

“I’ll be home in twenty minutes,” he said with a growl.

“Can you drive? I’ll have Dunbar pick you up.”

“I’m fine.”

I wasn’t buying it. “Dunbar is picking you up. Tell him where you are.” I handed the phone back to Dunbar. “Get him home in one piece.”

Crewe got home after midnight. His suit was no longer crisp because he’d been slouching in it all night at the bar. He tossed his expensive watch on the table like it wasn’t worth more than a car. When he took off his jacket, he threw it on the floor like he didn’t give a damn.

I was sitting up in bed reading when he walked inside. I hoped he’d had a chance to sober up on the drive home, but my expectations weren’t high. The fact that he was happy last night and took such an unexpected turn told me something significant happened. He didn’t just have a fight with Ariel. Something serious went down.

He didn’t look at me as he undressed. He made a pile of his clothes on the floor and kicked his shoes off like he was a child. He stripped all the way down until he was naked, and in all his glory, he looked nothing like a child. He was over six feet of man vertically, and nine inches of man horizontally.

He pulled the sheets back and got into bed like nothing happened. He lay on his back and immediately closed his eyes.

I didn’t say a word because I assumed he was so drunk he was about to pass out. Maybe it was best to let him sleep it off before I interrogated him in the morning.

He suddenly turned over and got on top of me, pinning me to the mattress and sticking his tongue down my throat. He didn’t give any warning before he kissed me and separated my thighs with his knees.

For a moment, I just went with it because that’s what my body was used to. But when I remembered he was being a dick all night, I shoved him off. “Crewe, what the hell are you doing?”

“Fucking you. Was that not clear?”

“Well, I’m not in the mood to be fucked right now.”

“I’ve never heard you say that before,” he said with a dead serious expression.

I pushed my hand against his solid chest and forced him on his back. “Just go to bed, Crewe.”

“You expect me to sleep with this thing?” He nodded to his hard cock that lay against his stomach.

“You can do whatever you want with it. But I’m going to bed.” I set the book on my nightstand and turned off the lamp.

He lay back and sighed, his hands finally off me.

I’d never seen Crewe this drunk before. That meant he’d exceeded his personal record in scotch drinking—which was a lot. I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t even go to work tomorrow. Having a deep conversation about his problems simply wasn’t possible right now.

“Lovely?” His hand moved for mine in the darkness.

“Hmm?”

His fingers wrapped around mine, his fingertips warm. “I apologize.”

“For?”

“For earlier,” he whispered. “The way I spoke to you. I can’t remember what I said, but I know it wasn’t good.”

He wasn’t the kind of man to apologize for anything, so when he showed his remorse, I knew it was heartfelt. “We can talk about it in the morning.”

“Just accept my apology.”

“I will later.” When we could have a completely coherent conversation.

“I just…need to know you’ll be here when I wake up. So please accept my apology.” His heavy words surrounded us even though he didn’t raise his voice. They contained more emotion than I was used to hearing from him. Crewe was an aggressive drunk, but he was also honest.

“I’m not going anywhere, okay?”

“When you were gone…I was so fucking miserable. I had all the money in the world but still felt like shit.”

I turned to look at him in the darkness. His eyes were closed and he faced the ceiling, and his eyebrows moved as he spoke to me.

“So…don’t leave.”

“I won’t.”

“Promise me.” He’d never expressed any hint of need. He showed his affection but always kept me at a distance. But now all his walls were down.

“I promise, Crewe.”

He finally dropped the argument and relaxed, his hand still in mine.

I was still angry with him, but I couldn’t resist his vulnerability. Crewe didn’t show his true colors to anyone, including me, but he let me see his heart on his sleeve. I moved to his side of the bed and wrapped my arm around his waist and rested my head on his shoulder.

His arm immediately moved across mine, and he turned his face into me, his lips resting against my hairline. His smell washed over me, along with the overpowering scent of gin. Maybe it wasn’t gin, but I was so used to smelling scotch on him that I could tell he hadn’t been drinking it.

He fell asleep almost immediately, his breathing changing.

I stayed that way for another few minutes and listened to his heart beat against my palm. Crewe could be cold and cruel, but he was just a man underneath that exterior. He had a heart of gold that he couldn’t hide as much as he tried.

That’s why I forgave him so easily.

Crewe’s alarm went off at the same time as it did every other morning, and this time, he smashed his fist against it, shattering it into pieces across the nightstand.

Damn.

He didn’t open his eyelids as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes, his mood already black like it was last night.

I assumed he wouldn’t go to work at all today.

He dragged one hand down his face and finally opened his eyes, squinting as he took in the early morning light. He turned to me and focused on my face, taking a few seconds to recognize my features.

“I’m pretty sure your alarm is busted.”

He released a quiet growl before he sat up. “Jesus Christ, my head hurts.”

“Already got you covered.” I grabbed the two tablets off my nightstand along with the glass of water.

He swallowed the pills dry before he downed the water.

“You should just go back to sleep. You’re gonna feel like shit all day.”

“I can’t.” He kicked off the sheets and got out of bed. He was in a pissy mood like he was last night, before he apologized to me. He obviously didn’t remember that conversation at all.

“Why not?”

“I’m meeting with Ariel.”

I hoped it wouldn’t lead to another fight that would send him to the bar. “You guys work it out?”

“No.” He ran his fingers through his hair as he stood upright, looking sexy completely nude and with an impressive morning wood. “She’s leaving my company.”

I stopped thinking about how hot he looked. “What? She quit?”

“Yeah. Now I have to buy her out for her portion. It’s really a meeting between lawyers.”

I hopped out of bed. “She’s quitting because of me?”

“She’s not your biggest fan.” He walked into the bathroom and got the shower running.

I followed him inside. “Do you realize how stupid that sounds? I have nothing to do with your partnership.”

“I agree. But she doesn’t trust my judgment anymore.” Crewe acted like he didn’t give a damn, like we were talking about what color we should paint the bedroom, but I knew that was just a front. They’d been working together for nearly ten years. They were more than just business partners—they were family. He grabbed a towel and hung it on the rack outside the shower door.

“That’s not fair.”

He shrugged before he stepped inside. “I did just fine without her once. I’ll do fine without her again.” He shut the door and stood under the water, his ass muscles thick and tight.

I didn’t have much time to think about my actions before I did them. I threw on jeans and a t-shirt before I left the room, knowing Crewe wouldn’t realize I was gone for at least ten minutes. She might not be there yet, but since she was so punctual all the time, she probably would be early.

I walked into Crewe’s office and saw her sitting on one of the sofas, accompanied by a man in a black suit.

When she looked at me, it was like she saw right through me. She was indifferent to my appearance, as if I was a cloud of air she couldn’t see. She turned away as soon as she saw me, examining the bookshelf stored with old classics.

I shut the door and took a seat on the opposite sofa, not backing down despite her attempt to ignore me. “Ariel.”

She turned her gaze back on me, giving me a look colder than winter. “Will Crewe be in shortly?”

“He’s in the shower and doesn’t know I’m here.”

“Oh, good,” she said sarcastically. “This should be fun.”

I didn’t have time to be sensitive to her insults. I had an objective. “Ariel, I don’t think this is a good idea—for either of you.”

“I’ll be fine. Thanks for the concern.” Her lawyer sat there in silence, watching our interaction with little interest.

“Are you really leaving because of me?”

“Yes.” She adjusted her glasses before she looked down at her folder. “I can’t trust a man who behaves this stupidly.”

She could insult me, but not the man I loved. “He’s not stupid, Ariel.”

“How does that saying go? Stupid is as stupid does? That describes him pretty well.”

“That’s not true, and you know it. Things didn’t work out the way I wanted them to. I didn’t mean for Joseph to come here. I didn’t mean for Crewe to get shot. I didn’t mean for anyone to get involved in this. I was going to speak to Crewe about our situation and ask him if I could have my freedom. But I never got the chance.”

“But you had the chance to call Joseph?”

I gritted my teeth. “To tell him he didn’t need to ambush Crewe, that I had a better plan to get out of here.”

Ariel stared at me without blinking.

“Joseph and his men came to the distillery opening in Edinburgh.”

Her eyes narrowed.

“He was waiting until Crewe left me alone before he could snatch me. I didn’t want that to happen, so I stuck to Crewe’s side like glue. When I saw Joseph in the hallway, I pulled Crewe inside another room so he wouldn’t get shot. I could have betrayed you before, but I didn’t. I always tried to protect Crewe and Joseph at the same time, while trying to get myself out of harm’s way.”

“Crewe isn’t harm’s way.”

It was like she didn’t listen to anything else I said. “Ariel, I don’t have any ill will toward Crewe or anyone else he interacts with. Joseph won’t be a problem ever again. I told him how I felt about Crewe, so he’ll never touch a hair on his head. I wish Crewe and I started out differently, but it doesn’t change the way we ended up. When I say I love him, I mean it. Why else would I be here?”

“I don’t give a damn how much you think you love him. That man has been to hell and back, and he doesn’t deserve any kind of disloyalty. You betrayed him—stabbed him in the back.”

“Uh, he kidnapped me. Why is that important fact never included in the conversation? What would you do if you were kidnapped? Would you ever give up, Ariel? I sure hope not.”

Her gaze remained steady, her eyes unflinching. “And that would be fine. I expected you to try to escape. But you chose to manipulate him to do it, and the idiot actually fell for it.”

“I fell for it too,” I snapped. “While I was trying to get him to fall in love with me, I fell in love with him instead. I wanted to talk to Crewe about having a different kind of relationship, one where I had independence. If I’d really wanted to betray Crewe, I would have let Joseph kill him at the distillery. I would have stabbed him in the neck while he was sleeping. I would have bashed a vase against the base of his skull while he was in the shower. But I didn’t.”

She rolled her eyes and looked away. “If you’re done, I’d like to wait for Crewe—alone.”

Geez, she was a bitch. “You can’t leave, Ariel. He needs you.”

“Not as much as he needs what’s between your legs.”

I chewed on the inside of my lip as I swallowed the insult. “What can I do to prove myself to you?”

She grabbed the glass of water from the coffee table and took a long drink. “You want to know what you can do?”

“Yeah,” I snapped. “I just asked.”

“Leave. Leave him and never come back. Then I’ll stay.”

That was impossible. “Then he’ll be miserable. He’ll be miserable if he loses you too. He needs both of us, Ariel.”

“Leave,” she repeated. “Let him get his life back on track.”

“Back on track? I’m the one who’s gotten him to cut back on drinking. I’m the one who gets him to crack a smile once in a while. I understand business is important to both of you, but it’s not everything. He needs more than that.”

“He didn’t before.”

“It’s a good thing he does now.”

She glanced at the lawyer then returned to ignoring me.

“Ariel, come on. We can work this out. You’re like family to Crewe.”

“I was—until he picked you.”

“Why does he have to pick at all? Ariel, why am I such a threat to you? I would never hurt Crewe.”

“Oh, really?” She raised an eyebrow. “Crewe is supposed to marry someone of his station, and not just for business. He needs to carry on his bloodline through someone of noble birth. That’s how it works. And you’re telling me you’re just gonna step aside and let that happen?”

The idea of Crewe spending his life with someone else made me sick to my stomach. Watching him walk off with a princess or a duchess while I slowly faded into the background would make me hurt worse than anything else in my life. I didn’t know what the future held for us, but I knew letting him go would break my heart.

She cocked her head to the side when I didn’t answer. “That’s what I thought. You’ve done nothing but ruin Crewe’s life. You’re a fucking cockroach that just won’t die. You’re selfish and inconsiderate. I can’t stand by and watch Crewe throw away his legacy like this—because he’s family.”

“If he’s family—”

Crewe walked inside in a gray suit and black tie. With a look of consternation and professionalism, he didn’t seem hungover at all. Maybe a hot shower and a few painkillers had been enough to straighten him out. “London.” He walked to the couch and looked down at me, his hands in his pockets.

I didn’t appreciate the cold way he spoke to me, so I spoke just as coldly. “Crewe.”

He didn’t give a smartass comment like he normally would. “Give us the room.”

My eyes narrowed even more. I didn’t appreciate being bossed around when I was only trying to help him.

He picked up on the tension. “Please, Lovely.”

I stood up and ignored Ariel as I walked around the couch. Before I passed Crewe, he grabbed me by the elbow and leaned into me, pressing a gentle kiss to my cheek.

I knew it was the only form of apology he could express.

He let me go then walked to the couch.

I left the room and shut the door behind me. I lingered outside the doorway in the hope I could catch a word or two, but his door was so thick and the room was so big that I couldn’t make out a single word.

All I could think about was what Ariel said to me. The only way I could make her stay was if I walked away. I had to let Crewe move on and marry someone who was more worthy of his affection. I was okay with not knowing what would happen between Crewe and me, but I didn’t like the idea of knowing nothing ever could happen. But if that was the case, why did I move all the way here?

Crewe returned to the bedroom a few hours later. He was still stiff in his suit, his mood black and palpable. He looked the same as he did last night, pissed off and drunk. Except he hadn’t been drinking—at least to my knowledge. “What did you say to her?”

“She didn’t tell you?” I asked in surprise.

“She’s not my partner anymore.” He immediately moved for the liquor cabinet, needing booze the second he walked into a room. He couldn’t even carry on a conversation without having a glass in his hand.

“Crewe.”

He held the bottle as he looked at me.

“We can’t erase all the progress you’ve made.”

He turned around and poured a glass. “I erased all my progress when you left.” He took a drink and faced me. “So, we’re back to square one.”

“Whether I’m here or not, you should take it easy.”

“We both know you’re the key to both my health and happiness.” He took another long drink before he set the glass down. “What did you say to her?”

“I asked her to stay.”

“That obviously didn’t work…”

“I told her she was overreacting, that my feelings for you are genuine and I would never hurt you…again. But that wasn’t enough for her. She said I already betrayed you.” I left out the part about marriage, knowing that put unnecessary stress on our relationship. “It’s frustrating because I explained my side of the story, but she just won’t listen. I know she’s not stupid. She’s just…”

“Stubborn,” Crewe finished. “Yeah, I know.” He chuckled. “I’ve known her for a long time. She hasn’t changed since I first met her.”

“You didn’t fight for her?”

“No.” He fell back into one of the high-backed armchairs in the living room. “She made her decision. I’m not going to chase her. The money has been handled. I don’t owe her anything, and she doesn’t owe me anything.” He finished his glass then set the empty cup on the table.

“There’s more to your relationship than business.”

His eyes fixated on my gaze. “What are you implying?”

“That you love her.”

He shook his head slightly. “I’ve never had feelings for her. You know she’s gay, right?”

“That’s not what I mean, Crewe. I know you love her like family.”

He looked away, as if admitting it was too difficult. “She’s one of the few people I trust…”

“You can’t just let her go, Crewe. Maybe you can give her some space then talk to her.”

“It won’t do any good. She gave me an ultimatum, and I made my decision.”

Me. “There shouldn’t be an ultimatum at all.”

“I understand her point of view. I’ve made some unusual decisions, so she questions my judgment.”

“Your personal life has nothing to do with your work.”

“That’s not completely true. If you have a DUI, it’s a lot more difficult to get a job. That has nothing to do with a position you’re applying for, but it’s relevant. If you make bad decisions off the clock, will you make good decisions on the clock?”

“First of all, a DUI is a traffic offense. Not the same thing. And second of all, are you implying I’m a bad decision?”

“If you were, would I still be here?”

“You never answered the question.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Objectively, yes. You are a bad decision. You aren’t a suitable partner, and we started off in a complicated situation. But you shouldn’t take that personally.”

“Yeah, that’s easy to do…”

“You asked me a question, and I answered honestly.” He crossed his legs, resting his ankle on the opposite knee. He ran his palm up the side of his face, feeling his five o’clock shadow that had already started to come in. “Forget about Ariel. She’s gone, and we need to move on.”

“I just don’t think it’s fair that you’re losing her because of me.”

“I don’t either. But that was her choice.”

“And you’re really okay with this?”

“Okay with what?” He looked at me, his fingertips resting under his chin.

“Losing her so you can be with me.” She was far more valuable than I ever was. I was the reason he had a scar over his chest at that very moment. I didn’t help him with his business or anything else. I was easily replaceable; Ariel wasn’t.

He shrugged. “I’m not happy with the way things turned out, but I know I can’t live without you. Been there, done that.” He avoided my gaze, his fingertips moving over his chin.

When I walked toward him, he finally looked up, his gaze intense and vulnerable at the same time. It was a look I’d been seeing more of, particularly last night. Sometimes it seemed like he wanted to be more open with me but was afraid of doing it.

I stood at his side and ran my fingers over his forearm as it rested on the armchair. “Why did you go out last night?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why didn’t you just come to me upstairs?”

He looked away again. “I don’t know that answer either.”

“I think you do, Crewe.” My fingers slid underneath his sleeve so I could feel his bare skin. His corded veins were prominent across his forearm. I traced one with my fingertip.

He didn’t give me an answer.

I lowered myself to my knees in front of him, sitting between his knees.

His gaze shifted to me instantly, his jaw hardening.

My hands started at his knees and moved up, pressing over his thighs all the way to his waist. When I creased the fabric of his slacks, I defined the outline of his hard cock as it sat over his left thigh. “Why didn’t you come to me last night?”

He watched my hands. “I was angry.”

“And when have I ever not helped you with your anger?” My hand slid over his hard cock on the way to his fly. I undid his belt and popped the button.

His eyes moved to my face.

“Why didn’t you come to me, Crewe?”

His eyes darkened with arousal. “Because I was afraid Ariel was right.”

I unzipped his fly and pulled the front of his pants down so I could see his black boxers underneath. “Right about what?”

“About my judgment. About my leadership. About you.”

I grabbed his boxers and pulled them down, his nine-inch length coming free. “Why couldn’t you confide this to me?”

“It’s hard for me to let you in.”

“Why?” I pulled his slacks and boxers down to his ankles, letting his cock lie against his stomach and his balls hang over the edge of the chair.

“Because you betrayed me.” His eyes were mixed with both sadness and arousal, two very conflicting emotions.

“I would never betray you again, Crewe. I promise.” I pulled my shirt over my head and unclasped my bra. “No more going out whenever you’re upset. I want you to come to me.”

His eyes moved to my tits.

I grabbed his length and ran my tongue from the base to the tip. When I got to his head, I tasted the arousal that had already begun to seep out. I positioned myself closer to the chair so I could press his dick between my tits. “Okay?”

He moaned quietly as he felt his dick slide through my tits. “Okay.”

I pressed my tits together so there was a smaller gap to slide through. My tits weren’t impressive, but I had enough cushion to make this work. He had a long enough dick that I could straighten my back and be eye level with him. I pressed my mouth against his and gave him a slow kiss as I moved up and down, sliding his dick between my tits.

His mouth trembled against mine slightly before his hand dug into my hair. His tongue moved against mine, and he deepened the kiss until he possessed me. A moan entered my mouth, but I couldn’t tell if it came from him or me. I got more of his tongue than I had before, and I liked feeling it in my mouth. I liked feeling his arousal through him and not just his dick.

“I want to be what we were before I left…” I knew I was asking for the impossible. The kind of trust we had was built on a six-month relationship. Now we had to start over, come back from a tragedy. The only thing keeping us together was the fact that we loved one another, but everything else was working against us.

He kissed me harder then sucked my bottom lip into his mouth. “I do too. But I need more time.”

“Time for what?”

He breathed hard against my mouth as he rubbed through my soft flesh. “It’s hard for me to trust people. You know that.”

“You can trust me.”

He pressed his forehead to mine and squeezed my tits in his strong hands. “I know, Lovely.”

“Then do it.”

He looked into my eyes as he thrust his cock through the valley between my breasts. When he was aroused at this magnitude, he was even more handsome than usual. His jaw was tighter because his mouth was slightly parted. “Alright.” He grabbed the back of my neck and guided my face down to his lap, telling me exactly what he wanted.

I opened my mouth wide and gave it to him.