Chapter Ten
Elliot
I’m an ass.
I get up from the couch to pace around the suite. Watching Madison stalk away just about killed me, but it’s for her own good. I lied about touching her just to see the color of her lingerie. I lied because it was too much. I lied because no way in hell would I have been able to stop if I’d kept going, and Madison deserves more than a quick fuck on a hotel couch. That’s how gone I was for her. Ready to bang her and worry about the aftermath later.
Worry about her feelings later.
This is uncharted territory for me. Yes, I’ve screwed a coworker before, but not anyone I work directly with on a daily basis. Not anyone who wasn’t equally experienced and in it for nothing but a quick release. And definitely not when it’s against office policy.
Damn, she tasted good. Felt good. Smelled good. She is everything good. An innocent in a new land of work and travel, while I’m anything but.
I press a few fingers to my sternum. Further complicating matters is a rare tugging in my chest. I didn’t fucking give my heart permission to get involved.
Too late, asshat. You care about her.
And therein lies my reason for hurting her. We’ve agreed how important our jobs are and that means even in friend mode, we have to play on opposite sides of the sandbox. I can’t park my shovel anywhere near her bucket.
I still owe her an apology for being a dick, though.
“Madison?” I say against her closed bedroom door. When I get no answer, I knock lightly. “Mads?”
She’s either asleep or ignoring me. I contemplate trying the handle, then take a step back. It doesn’t matter what she is, I shouldn’t disturb her. Instead I go back to the couch, pick up my cell, and text Mateo and Levi where I’m at.
They both respond in less than a minute.
Mateo: Thanks for the update. Don’t get any ideas.
Levi: Thanks for letting us know. And what ideas? Why don’t I know about these ideas?
I contemplate sending the middle finger emoji, but take too long and Levi texts again.
Levi: Wait. Are these ideas about Madison? Dude.
Mateo: Caught him checking out her ass.
Levi: Bad idea, man. She’s the best thing to happen to you at work.
Mateo: Yep.
Levi: Harper will kick your ass if you do something stupid.
Mateo: She’ll have to get behind me. He knows this, though.
The texts are popping up one right after the other, so I see no reason to break up their little conversation. The fuckers are probably sitting next to each other at home.
Levi: What happened to that HR girl? Leave a deposit with her again.
Mateo: Good idea. In the meantime, Dick meet Jack.
Levi: Twice if necessary.
Jesus. My best friends are telling me to jack off.
Me: You done?
Mateo/Levi: Yes.
Me: Next time I’m not checking in.
Mateo: Touchy.
Me: Annoyed. I’m going to sleep now.
Levi: By sleep you mean…
Mateo: Alone, right?
Me: Good to know I’ve got your support, assholes.
Mateo: More than you know, asshole.
Levi: Brothers from other mothers, asshole.
That’s the truth. We’ve been best friends for more than a decade, and I know they’ve got my back. Just like I’ve always had theirs. I look out the floor-to-ceiling window. Rain pelts the glass, the storm showing no signs of calling it a night.
Me: How’s the weather there?
Mateo: Big-ass storm here, too.
Levi: It’s supposed to let up tomorrow.
Me: Okay. Talk then.
Mateo: Remember two-foot berth, dude.
Me: What happens in Seattle, stays in Seattle.
I press the home button and toss the phone onto the other couch. I’ve gotten enough warning, thank you very much. I also have no plans to tell him that two feet is bullshit and I’m no saint. If Madison walked out of her room right now and wanted me, I don’t think I could refuse her.
Would my conscience make it difficult to look James in the face afterward? No doubt, yes. With that thought in mind, I drop to the side of the couch and bang out some push-ups. I need to do something to relieve the tension in my muscles, and pushing myself until they burn with exhaustion is about the only way I’m going to get any sleep tonight.
I’ve counted to forty when I sense Madison’s eyes on me. I turn my head and find her standing in the doorway of her room.
“Don’t let me stop you,” she says.
I do another ten. I could keep showing off, but I’d rather not waste any more time when I could be talking to her. I’m winded when I get to my feet, my muscles tired and my breathing shallow. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“I’m sorry for being a jerk.”
She lifts a brow as if to say, for what exactly?
I deserve that. I acted like a dick on several counts. “I’m sorry for taking advantage of our situation and forgetting myself. I should have left you alone, and I’m really sorry if I hurt your feelings.” I’ve never been more sincere in my life.
“Apology accepted. I’m sorry if I—”
“You don’t owe me any apologies, Mads. This is on me. I didn’t act like a gentleman, and it won’t happen again.” I walk to the small kitchen to grab a bottle of water. “Would you like a water?” I ask, pulling one out of the fridge. “There’s juice bottles and sports drinks, too.”
“Water would be great. Thanks.” She takes a seat on the couch.
I do the smart thing and sit across from her.
She twists off the cap and takes a long sip. I watch her throat work, mesmerized by the tiny flex of her smooth skin. I lick my lips, remembering the taste of her and wanting another so badly I ache. “Want to watch a movie?” she asks. “I’m not tired enough to fall asleep.”
“Sure.” I scramble for the television remote before I let my thoughts get too carried away. Unfortunately the TV is behind me, which means I need to get my ass up and park it next to hers in order to watch anything.
“Elliot.”
“Yeah?” I sit as far away from her as I can.
“I don’t want things to be weird again.”
I settle down and look at her. “I don’t, either. Truth, though?”
“Yes, please.”
“Weird isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It will remind us to keep some distance.”
“Okay.”
Ten minutes into a romcom she wanted to watch—she hates anything scary or violent—weird disappears and we couldn’t sit any closer if we tried. She’s snuggled against my side, our feet are on the coffee table, and we’re laughing at the same jokes. It’s comfortable.
Dangerous.