Chapter Nineteen

~Nicole~

 

I woke up in the dark, my stomach rolling, and I stumbled to the bathroom. For being something that was supposed to stick to the first trimester, my morning sickness was certainly still kicking my ass.

I knelt there for several moments, completely tossing the contents of my stomach, before slumping to the floor. At least the carpet smelled fresh and-

Wait, there wasn’t carpet in my car. Where the hell was I?

I sat up with a star, my mind supplying everything from alien abduction to kidnapping, before the rest of my brain woke up and filled in what really happened.

Holy crap. Had all of that really happened?

I looked around and the fancy bathroom I was in confirmed it. It hadn’t been a dream! Scrambling to my feet -as much as a pregnant woman could scramble- I stepped out into the main room.

James was sleeping on the couch, his mouth slightly open as he breathed deeply. How was it he still looked so handsome when I always looked like a slack jawed slob whenever I was passed out?

The very first tendrils of morning light were just beginning to shine across his chiseled features, highlighting his strong nose and killer cheekbones. His hair was mussed, but in the perfect, bed-head sort of way that a lot of models in magazines tried to affect but didn’t get quite right.

Huh, even with him laying there, looking like Prince Charming, I still had a hard time believing he was real. Surely, he had to be an alcoholic. Or a woman beater. Or a drug lord. There was no way someone could be so nice, rich and attractive. There were only so many good traits a single person could have before I had to get suspicious.

Well, even if I was suspicious, I had his promises certified in a legal contract. Which was crazy.

But I’d wasted enough time worry about what would or wouldn’t happen. I was being a beautiful gift in the now, and I needed to take advantage of it. Stress wasn’t good for the baby and if I wanted to be the best mommy I could be, I needed to wind down and appreciate the leg up I had been given.

Well, since he was doing so much for me, the least I could do was make him breakfast. I went to the kitchenette that was honestly bigger than some of the whole kitchens I had had when we lived in trailers and rooted around the fridge. It wasn’t quite as well stocked as the fridge in Vegas had been, but there was bagels, condiments and cereal bars, fresh fruit and a couple juices. I could make due with that. Sure, it wasn’t going to be some grand banquet, but it would still be something nice to wake up to.

I busied myself with getting stuff ready. I started up the fancy coffee machine and put one of those little cups into it, then cut the bagels. It took me a little longer to find the toaster, which was tucked away in one of the cabinets, but in about ten minutes or so I had a couple of plates made up.

I didn’t know if it was the coffee or the bagels, but James because to stir just about before I was done. I watched him from the corner of my eye until he sat up, looking adorably groggy. “I don’t remember ordering room service this morning,” he said, voice raspy in that just-woke-up sort of way.

“Consider this complimentary,” I answered. “Do you prefer coffee, water, or juice in the morning.”

“Coffee,” he said quickly. “And water.”

“Coming right up.”

I filled up two glasses and a mug, stacked the plates on my arm and headed over to him on the couch. He took them from me as I sat, and soon we were both digging into our carbo-loaded meal.

We didn’t say much, but mostly because our mouths were full. After my morning sickness I was feeling a lot better, but also extremely hungry. It was good to get something solid in me that I hopefully wouldn’t toss into the toilet in an hour or so.

“Thanks.” James said when we were done, setting our plates to the side. “You ready for more shopping?”

I laughed, nervously of course. It was like each morning I woke up at square one and had to work myself all the way back to a new level of trust by the end of the day.

“You’re certainly eager for being a man’s man.”

“That’s sexist,” he retorted, picking up the plates and heading for the kitchen, where he dumped them in the sink.

“You got me there.” I stood as well and headed for the bedroom. “After today, you’re going back to your company, right?”

“Yup. It’s a quick four-hour fight so we’ll have to organize our schedules for certain events.”

“Events?” I asked curiously.

“Yeah. Like our meeting with the divorce attorney, signing papers. Things like that.”

Oh. Right. That was his ultimate goal in coming down here. I guess that I had gotten so swept up in the niceties and the chemistry between us that I had forgotten for a moment. Maybe I could blame it on pregnancy brain, because I certainly wasn’t acting like myself.

“Sounds like a plan. I’m going to go get dressed.”

“Great, bet you I’m still done before you are.”

“Probably,” I answered, closing the door.

But my heart wasn’t in it. I was in a sour mood and I couldn’t quite say why. Looking at my clothes, I decided to worry about what I was going to put on rather than what was going on with the painful squeezing in my heart.

*

 

I let out a long sigh, resting my body against the passenger’s seat like it was a life line.

“Do you need a break?” James asked from beside me, chuckling slightly.

I looked at him and blew a hard bit of air from between my lips, making them sputter like an engine. “A little,” I said once I finished the exhausted gesture.

“We’re only halfway through the day, you know. There’s still a whole lot more to come.”

“I know,” I groaned, closing my eyes. “And I’m grateful, I really am, but my shoes are killing me and so is my back. My heart is excited, but my body is less than willing.”

“No wonder with those shoes you’re wearing.”

“Huh?” I looked down at my feet to see I had definitely put on the comfy flats that I remembered. “What’s wrong with my shoes?”

“No arch support, no heel padding, and I’m sure that pregnant women need even more feet care. You really should be wearing something that takes better care of your feet.”

“Wait, really?”

He nodded. “I spotted a nice maternity section in one of the stores we went shopping in during our baby registering stint. We’ll swing by there to see if they have anything.”

“I mean, if you want to,” I responded. “I’m still kinda getting used to this, you buy things whenever I need it, so it’s a little weird.”

“To me it’s weird that you wouldn’t just go and get them.”

“Two different lives, I guess.” I reached over and patted his hand. “Let’s go get some shoes so I stop being a big baby while having a baby inside of me.”

He smirked at that and we drove off, heading back to the mall. I was pretty sure that James had been to the shopping center more times with me than the rest of his years combined.

We arrived on the side of the mall opposite of the food court -my least favorite side- and where a lot of the higher end stores were. I followed James in, and instantly recognized the store we were walking towards.

It was one of those super fancy stores with entire rooms for dressing areas, and refreshments set about. The kind where if you went in without looking like one of their clients, they’d have someone tail you to make sure you found your way out quickly.

I remembered registering for a few things in there and they were just so expensive. It figured that this was the one place that James remembered.

We made our way to the maternity area, which of course was right next to the baby area that we had spent so much time exploring previously. I had to be honest, their selection was great, but I could already feel sticker shock starting to sink in.

“Ah, I think I see shoes over here,” James said, pointing.

I looked over but was surprised to see that the racks and displays were too tall for me to make out where he was pointing. That was impressive considering that I was no shorty myself. How were the average women, or shorties like my mother, supposed to reach anything?

I didn’t know, but I supposed it didn’t matter, because I followed James and sure enough, there was a whole section of cushioned and specially designed shoes for pregnant women.

And they weren’t hideous either, which seemed pretty amazing. They ranged from practical to full glam, but none of them were the overly designed shoe-boats I expected. Whoever said money couldn’t buy happiness didn’t take into consideration that it could certainly buy a lot of style and comfort.

James picked out several pairs and I willed myself not to look at the tags attached to the overly pricey box.

“Shall we try these on?”

“Sure,” I answered, wobbling over to the lush seats they had next to the shoe displays.

But before I could quite make it, something caught my eye. It was a pair of teal, leathery type pregnancy leggings and they just looked so nice.

I reached over, feeling the material, and despite it’s leathery look, the inside was soft and buttery. I bet it would be so comfortable to wear, but a quick glance at the price tag had me grimacing and walking away. The day I spent a hundred and fifty dollars on leggings was the day I was dressing to meet the Lord himself.

“What were you looking at?” James asked from behind me.

Oh no, I knew that tone. He was about to do that billionaire thing again, wasn’t he? “Nothing,” I answered quickly. “Let’s go try on these shoes!”

“What are these, leggings? They seem nice.”

Damn. That man really never missed a beat. I turned to him, smiling sheepishly. “I guess they might have caught my eye.”

“Why don’t you try them on?”

“Eh… that seems like a lot of work. I have to take off my current pants, put those on and then take them off and put my original ones back on.”

He fixed me with such a charming look that my legs almost went out from under me. “Would you try them on? For me?”

I licked my lips, trying to think if I could refuse him, but I decided it would be less work and stress to just try on the thing. “Sure.”

He handed them to me and wrapped one of his arms around my waist, guiding me towards some other area which I guessed was where the dressing room was. We walked together, stride in stride despite the difference in our leg lengths, until we were in the fanciest dressing room that I had ever seen.

It was basically the size of a small bedroom with one of those trifold-mirrors and a little stage. There was the type of lighting that made you feel good in anything rather than making you feel like a washed out, beached whale.

There were two, thick and comfy chairs, complete with plenty of pillows, a small corner table with a bucket of ice and sparkling water in it, really anything you could ask for.

“Here you are,” James said, handing me the leggings and closing the door behind him. I knew once I put those leggings on I would absolutely love them, but for some reason -even after everything he had already done for me- I still felt guilty for him spending money on something just for me and not our child.

But I didn’t see a way out of it, I struggled out of my pants and into the leggings. They were just as creamy and buttery as I had thought they would be, and I instantly felt like doing a cartwheel. Not that I ever could do a cartwheel, but that was beside the point.

“What do you think?” James asked from the other side of the door.

“They’re pretty nice,” I answered, crossing over and opening it for him. “Tadaa.”

“I like it,” he said, nodding appreciatively. “It looks comfortable.”

“Just comfortable?” I countered, giving him a mock-offended look. “They’re supposed to look effortless and sexy.”

He took a smooth step forward so that his chest was practically touching me. “I thought that went without saying.”

I figured I had two ways I could play this. I could step away and brush it off with a blush and a laugh then we would go about our day… or I could bounce that ball right back into his court.

I closed the distance between us, pressing my breasts against him -which was impressive considering my belly. “Well, maybe a girl wants to hear it once in a while.”

“In that case, you look like some sort of sexy, but slightly brash secret agent who puts a little too much care into their appearance for someone being incognito. You look like the kind of woman that would seduce me, just to find out my greatest weakness.”

“Oh, do I?” I went onto my tiptoes and pressed my lips against his, deciding to forget all about keeping our distance and indulge in all the desires pooling in my belly.

It was like a switch flipped inside of James and suddenly his mouth was devouring mine, heat rushing through my body. Our hands were all over each other, and the now familiar rise of lust between us was overflowing.

I pressed myself entirely into him, hoping he would pick me up or bend me over or any other number of positions, but instead he gently pushed me away. I looked up at him, concerned and confused, but he pointed to the chair behind me.

“Sit,” he ordered, firmly, but not rudely, and a thrill washed over me. But just when I was about to lower myself into the chair, he commanded, “Take the leggings off first.”

“Really?” I shot back. I didn’t know what it was about him being so masculine and in charge that made me want to saucily rebel, but it happened every time without fail. “You want me to take off my super sexy spy leggings that make me look like I want to seduce you for information?”

He took two single steps and then suddenly he was right in front of me, using that height and muscle to intimidate. “Yes.”

“Al…alright then.”

He gave me a bit of space and I went about doing what he asked, keeping my eyes on him the entire time. I tried to make a show of it, or as much of a show someone in my condition could make, slowly sliding it down my long legs and letting it pool on the floor. I went to hook my thumbs into my panties and pull them down too, but he stopped me.

“Leave them on.” I raised my eyebrow, surprised by his order, but he paid me no mind. “Sit down.”

I did, and he walked a few more steps back, looking me over like I was a good meal, and boy was I ready to be eaten.

“Spread your legs.”

I stared at him a moment, surprised by the direct order, but complied after a beat. I felt a bit exposed, vulnerable, but at the same time another thrill went through me.

“Good girl. Now touch yourself.”

“Wait, what?” A stupid response, I knew, but there was something so matter of fact about his order that it had shocked me clear out of left field. But then again, what had I been expecting? I felt the raw, animal attraction between the two of us ramp up the moment I kissed. How could I be surprised that the dominant man in front of me was indeed taking control?

So, I did as he said. My hand snaked around my stomach, fingers dancing just outside the light cotton of my underwear. I had never been so relieved that I hadn’t worn my torn up or worn out house panties, and I couldn’t help but wonder if I had chosen these subconsciously.

But that thought quickly died as my fingers slide further, causing a tickle of pleasure and excitement to lance up inside of me. I had never had sex somewhere so public, and even if we were in a separate room, the thought that a sales clerk could knock at any moment was making each and every move that much more impactful.

James neared me as I got more into it, his eyes locked on my center. My fingers were picking up in speed as the fabric covering me grew more and more slick, my body heating to the point where it felt like I might be on fire.

“James…” I whispered, using my second hand to caress my breasts, imagining it was one of his large, rough palms.

“That’s it,” he breathed, his eyes boring into me.

My fingers didn’t even have time to grow tired before I felt myself approaching the edge. I felt my cheeks flush, my heartbeat quicken, and my abdomen start to flutter. My fingers slipped lower, wanting to plunge within me rather than just focus on the hot button of pleasure at my apex, but then James was striding forward again and firmly gripping my arm.

“Get up,” he said simply.

I did, using his arm to help me, and then he was turning me around. I looked over my shoulder and the look he gave me was pure sex, making my legs shake even more.

With one firm hand on the middle of my make, he bent me forward until my hands were gripping the cushion of the soft chair and my knees were pressed against it. Then, I felt him crouch behind me, and my underwear was being slid down my legs.

I stepped out of it once he was down to my feet and I didn’t think that I had ever been so tightly wound before. I needed him inside of me as much as I needed air, and I worried that if I didn’t get it soon, that I might combust.

Finally, he stood, and I heard his pants unzipping. I got out a single gasp before I felt him pressing against my center and then sliding forward.

God! He was so big. I didn’t know how I forgot every time, but somehow, I managed. He stood there a moment, letting me adjust, then slowly pumped in and out of me.

Another sharp gasp escaped my mouth, so his hand came around to press over my mouth. It didn’t obstruct my ability to breathe, but it did help keep me quiet. The last thing we wanted was for someone to get wise to our little improvised mambo.

He picked up speed as we went along, drenching my brain and my entire being in absolute euphoria. I was already so close to the edge when we had started that it didn’t take me long to feel my end coming.

“Oh James, I’m close!” I managed to rasp, my breath a high-pitched whine.

“Don’t come yet,” he ordered, reaching down to grip my arms and pull them behind me so that he was supporting all of my upper body.

Of course, that made the angle chance and I felt like I had been shot with lightning. My spine arched, making me nearly form a U, and it took all of me to bare down and not lose myself.

It seemed like an eternity but was likely only a couple of minutes before I felt James throb within me, and I knew he too was about to reach completion.

“Now,” he ordered, giving me permission to lose myself to the white-hot pleasure at my feet.

And lose it I did. I let myself fall into paradise, and soon my whole body was enveloped by the indescribable pleasure that shook me from head to toe.

As if that weren’t enough, James found his own end too, and I felt him emptying into me, completing the moment. It was hot, and raw, and everything I had been craving for weeks.

Once the rush faded, we both sank onto the seat, breathing hard. I looked into him, and I had to fight the feeling that we were connected as more than just friends with benefits.

A good amount of time passed before he sighed contentedly and let his head fall back.

“I suppose you should get dressed so we can actually buy those shoes.”

“I suppose so,” I answered, sliding out of his lap. I wobbled a bit, but he caught me, making sure that I was steady before standing up to clean up the bit of a mess we made. I couldn’t help but wonder how many couples had been there before us, doing the same reckless thing and never leaving the place exactly how it had been before.

But one thing was for certain, new shoes or not, I was certainly going to be walking a little funny the rest of the day.

***

 

I thought I had known exhaustion before. I thought I knew what it was like to have my feet hurt from a long day, and my back yell at me to sit down for a moment, but as I stood in my brand-new apartment, looking over the Mississippi river, I was more bone tired than I had been in ages.

But it was done. I had everything a girl could dream of. A full kitchen. A bedroom set with all matching furniture. A sofa, a love seat and a recliner. Even a dining room set! My life was more furnished than it had ever been, and I felt like I was still catching up to it.

Actually, I was still catching up to everything. James had been a dream the entire shopping spree, and when everything was all said and done, he had hired movers, so I didn’t have to lift a finger. He had hired movers and I was still exhausted. I couldn’t imagine how I would feel if I had to do any physical labor myself.

It was just approaching seven pm. We really had spent eight hours shopping and telling the movers where to put what, and now it was time for James to go.

The two of us stood there, facing each other, the workers long gone and the apartment now full of things.

“Well, I guess I better go now,” he said, filling up so much space in the room. Space that would be so empty without him. How could I miss a man I hardly knew? Was it the hormones? Had to be the hormones.

“There are flights going out this late?” I asked, trying not to sound too interested.

“I have a friend with a private jet who wanted to come see the new branch that I’m opening. We leave by eight, arrive by midnight, it’s pretty ideal.”

“Eight? It’s seven ten now. Shouldn’t you be on your way?”

“Yeah… I suppose I should.”

The moment hung heavy in the air between us, like both of us were locked in place by some type of impregnable sludge that wouldn’t let us move.

Ugh. Maybe impregnable was not an appropriate word to use in the situation.

“I guess… I’ll see you later?” I didn’t mean for it to come out as a question but that’s exactly what it was. I felt like I had been swept up in a whirlwind and deposited in the Land of Oz.

Did that make me Dorothy? Or Toto?

“Well, here’s my number,” he said, handing me his card. “Please call me if you need anything, or if there are any big updates.”

“Yeah… yeah of course I’ll do that.”

I took his card, holding it between my two hands like it was some sacred vessel. Why was I acting so strange? He was just a man and it was just a number.

“Well, I should be going.”

“Yeah…” I took a step towards him, my face tilting upward like it had the few times that we had kissed. My heart was thundering in my chest and my palms were clammy.

He took a half step forward to, his hand coming up like it was going to caress my face. I tilted my head, wanting to lean into it, wanting to feel his touch, but for some inexplicable reason, we stopped.

We stood there, frozen in time, and the second seemed to last forever. Neither of us moved, I couldn’t tell if either of us were breathing.

Then, as suddenly as it started, it was over.

“Please, take care of yourself.”

“I…I will.”

And then he turned around and walked out the door.

I stared after him, listening to his footsteps down the hall, but the door was so well made that once it closed, all sounds were muffled. I couldn’t even hear the elevator or know if he had taken the stairs.

I stood there, in a strange sort of bewilderment. I had everything I could ever want. I had a great apartment, insurance now. I wouldn’t have to worry about anything as long as I played it straight and kept my nose to the grind.

I sank to my knees, the hardwood floors stinging my knees, but the pain felt nice. It gave me something to be upset about. It gave me a reason to be on the edge of tears.

And so, I sat there, for goodness knows how long, wondering what the hell was wrong with me, well into the night. When I finally did have enough wherewithal to shower and put myself to bed, I found myself unable to sleep.

Whatever it was. I needed to get over it, and fast.