Chapter 17

Keagan

After seeing Mason, work suddenly became chaotic. Something went wrong with a system, and I had to slave away with my team to sort it out as quickly as possible. When something goes wrong with a social media platform, the world goes mad. Not only is it poor form, but users are selfish and won’t allow for mistakes.

By the time I pull into my parking space, my head feels like sponge, and it throbs dully between my temples. I’ve been in meetings all day, arguing back and forth about what would be the quickest route to take. When I wasn’t arguing, I was staring at a screen, trying to figure out what the hell was wrong.

The smell of food lingers in the corridor leading to my front door, and I breathe in deeply. Living in an apartment building has its downsides. I hate it when I can smell everyone else’s supper, and I still have to go inside and cook my own.

When I push open the front door, the smell of food greets me, and the apartment feels warm and cozy. Dana is busy in the kitchen, and I spot pots on the stove. A carving board with a half-chopped salad sits on the counter.

“I’m home,” I say.

Dana turns around and smiles when she sees me.

“Perfect timing,” she says. “We can eat in five.”

I look at the food again.

“This is nice.”

She nods, smiling. “I thought I would do something nice for you, since you’re being so kind, letting me stay here.”

I scrutinize her face. I’m not sure what to make of her good mood. Earlier today, when Mason made that comment about us possibly being more than casual, her reaction was guarded. She ended up not staying for lunch, fleeing after her coffee. A part of me thought that she would still be upset when I came home.

She doesn’t seem upset at all.

“Go get changed into something more comfortable while I serve everything,” she says.

I must admit, coming home to a warm apartment with food almost ready is a great feeling. It gives me a taste of what it might be like if we were really together. I push the thought away. I can’t get my hopes up. I don’t know where we stand, and putting that kind of pressure on her and expecting something more is unfair.

I change out of my work clothes and into jeans and a t-shirt. When I rejoin Dana in the living room, the plates are steaming with a home cooked meal. She made rice, a stew of some kind, and a salad.

“This looks great, Dana,” I say and sit down on one of the bar stools at the counter. She pushes my plate toward me, hands me a knife and fork, and she walks around the counter and sits down on the barstool next to me.

I spear a piece of meat with my fork and put it in my mouth.

It tastes like heaven.

“I appreciate the effort,” I say, and take another bite. “This is delicious.”

“I was hoping we could sit down and just spend some time together,” she says. “We live in the same apartment, and sometimes we still manage to forget to communicate.”

I wonder if that is because of how much sex we’re having when life doesn’t get in the way. I don’t say it, though.

Dana makes small talk, asking about my day and how I managed to fix the crisis at work. I tell her what happened, and she listens attentively. Then she tells me about her interview and how relieved she feels having finally found a job. The conversation falls quiet for a while.

She clears her throat. “Can I ask you something?” she asks.

I nod.

“What would it mean for you to go public with this… thing that’s happening between us?”

I look at her. It’s a big question to ask.

“Well,” I start. “Seeing that I’m a public figure, so to speak, there will be a reaction. Some won’t like it.”

“How will it affect Sociable?” she asks.

I think about it for a second, before I shrug. “I don’t think it will affect it that much. We’ll be a scandal for a while, but in the business world, these things don’t mean as much as in the entertainment world. Besides, the platform is popular right now. I doubt I’ll be boycotted because people don’t like something in my personal life.”

Dana nods slowly. She’s pushing her food around on the plate.

“Why, are you going thinking about going public?” I ask.

When she glances up at me, she looks shy, unsure.

“I was just asking,” she says.

I turn to her, my food forgotten for the moment. “You made it clear we weren’t together like that, Dana,” I say.

She shrugs. “I didn’t know that this was more than fucking to you. We agreed on something. I didn’t think it meant anything more.”

I reach for her hand. “You’ve always been more to me. Being with you isn’t just some kind of dirty fantasy.” I hesitate and then grin. “At least, it’s not just a dirty fantasy.”

She smiles, but she still looks conflicted.

“Talk to me,” I say and reach for her, brushing my knuckles against her cheek.

She takes a deep breath.

“What did you tell Mason about me?” she asks.

“I’m glad you want to know,” I say. When I told Mason, I didn’t mean for him to reveal it to her directly. “I told him that I’ve always wanted to be with you, and that it was more than me just being horny and perverted. You’ve always been special to me.”

“I didn’t think this was more than just sex,” she says again.

I shrug. “It is. I can’t help it. You’re amazing.”

She smiles. Her cheeks color and dimples appear. She’s beautiful when she blushes.

“You’ve never told me this before,” she says.

I nod. “You’re right. I didn’t know how to. I didn’t know how you would feel. Until now, you’ve been the biggest secret crush in my life, a fantasy that I could turn to, but never realize.”

She blinks at me. Her blue eyes are large and serious. She’s drinking in everything I’m telling her.

“The ball’s in your court now,” I say.

“My court?” She frowns and turns back to her food. She jabs at a piece of potato with her fork and studies it without eating it. “Why?”

“Because I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want to do. But if you want to do this, if you want to take this further, it’s what I want, too.”

She finally takes a bite. I look at my own food and take a few more bites while she’s quiet and thinking. I’m almost done with my food when she looks at me again.

“It’s going to ruin your reputation,” she says. “You’ve had a clean slate until now. Even Liz ended before you became Mr. Famous, so they had nothing they could point at. If this comes out, it has the potential to be a huge scandal.”

I nod. “I know. But I still want to be with you.”

She takes a deep breath.

“Look,” I carry on. “What we feel for each other is all that matters. We’re not related, and we liked each other way before our parents got together. We are adults, and we can decide what we want.”

“You make it sound so easy,” she says.

I put my hand on her cheek, cupping it. Her eyes find mine.

“It is that easy,” I say. “We do what we want to do, and if the world doesn’t like it, well, fuck them. They can’t make us be any different than we are, and they won’t change what we feel.”

She smiles, but it doesn’t stick.

“And if things get harder?” she asks. “What if the tabloids say terrible things, and it does end up affecting your job, and everything goes wrong?”

I shake my head until she stops talking. “I’m not going to bail on you. I’ve never bailed on you, right?”

“You’ve always been a friend, a brother.”

I nod. “And even then, it was important to me to be there for you. It’s not going to change. No matter what they say about me, I’m still going to be the same man, and I’m still going to feel the same about you.”

She leans her cheek into my hand. She doesn’t say anything, but her eyes are still unsure.

“Let me prove it to you,” I say.

“How?”

“This Friday. We’re going out to celebrate your new job. Let’s go out to a restaurant. Together. None of this hiding and arriving separately nonsense. We’ll go out together. It will hit the public by storm, and I can prove to you that I don’t care about what they say.”

“You want to do it so soon?” she asks.

“I don’t want to wait. I want to show you that I am serious. There is no reason to wait. I don’t need give our relationship more time or slowly build up to a big reveal. I know what I want.”

Finally, she nods. “You look so sure about everything,” she says. “It’s why everyone always listens to you and follows you.”

I shake my head. “I look this sure about it because I am this sure about it. There’s nothing else to it.”

She smiles, and this time, it looks sincere, calm, and happy. It’s what I want from her. I want her to feel that I’m here for her, that I’ll make it work if I put my mind to it. If Dana feels this way about me, I couldn’t have dreamed of a happier ending, and I will do what I need to do to make this work.

I’ve always been a problem solver.

Now that we’ve talked about things, Dana relaxes, and we finish our meal, talking and laughing about trivial things again. My stomach is tight, though. I am suddenly nervous. I have no doubt that this is what I want, and I will go through with it as promised, but it’s a big step. It won’t be easy.

When we’re done eating, we wash the dishes together, pack away leftovers, and head off to bed. Dana kisses me goodnight and walks to her room.

“Dana,” I call after her. She turns to look at me.

“Come sleep in my bed tonight.”

I want her with me. I don’t even want to fuck. I just want her to be with me so I can wrap my arms around her. I am overwhelmed with emotion, and I want her warmth pressed against me and the sound of her breath in my ear.

She nods and disappears to change her clothes. When she’s finished, she comes to my room. I’m already in bed, and I lift the covers for her. She pads across the carpet and climbs into bed. I switch off my bedside lamp, and the room plunges into darkness. Dana lays against me, and her body heat soothes me the way I needed it to.

She cuddles against my chest and throws an arm over me. The smell of her is in my nostrils, and her curvy body melds into mine. My body responds automatically, and my cock hardens, but this is not what being this close to her is about right now. I kiss her on her hair, stroke her arm, and close my eyes.