I slipped in the apartment as quietly as I could, taking off my shoes before I headed to the bedroom.  The lights were off, but he'd forgotten to shut the blinds in the living room, and a full moon shone through the windows.  Zach had been going through a lot, physically, emotionally, and mentally.  If he'd fallen asleep, he needed it.

We had a lot to talk about, but he could use the rest.  What I had to say could wait.

Then I saw him sprawled on the couch.  His body barely fit in it.  His head rested on the armrest, and his legs hung over the other side.  Kneeling, I crept closer, leaning down to admire him.

He looked peaceful, despite the fine line on his forehead.

His lips were parted slightly, and I could hear each inhale and exhale from his mouth.  I missed kissing him.  I leaned my head lower, and stopped a breath short from his lips.  With a soft, subtle touch, I grazed my lips over his, and inhaled his scent.  A quiver erupted in my belly.

As I drew back, his eyes slowly opened into slits.  

My heart hammered in my chest as he raised a hand and it hovered over the side of my face.

"Maggie," he whispered.  The moon's rays illuminated his face as he lifted his head off the couch.  With the pads of his callused fingers, he drew a line from my temple down to my jaw.  I ached for this.  I ached for him.  

I closed my eyes, committing how it felt.  He hadn't touched me like this since the incident.  I hadn't pushed it, but god, I missed him.  Zach continued to explore the angles, the dips, rises, and grooves of my face—the edges of my eyelids, the tip of my nose, and when he reached my lips, I captured the tip of his thumb between my teeth, and tasted him.

He groaned, and thinking he was in pain, I opened my eyes.  I saw hurt.  I saw pain.  But I also saw desire, need, want.  I couldn't let him suffer any longer.  Releasing his thumb, I pressed my lips on his and accepted everything he was willing to give.

His hands threaded through my hair as I knelt closer to his body and wrapped my arms around his neck.  When he released me, he rasped, "Maggie...I can't...I..."

I stopped him, pressing a finger over his lips.   Tonight, he didn't have to explain anything.  He didn't have to warn me.  He didn't have to try to convince me that he was all wrong inside, that I should be afraid, and I should keep my distance.

He twirled a lock of my hair around his finger while he studied my face.  He wasn't anyone I should be afraid of, not when all I felt for him was love.  I took his hand and stood, waiting for him to understand whatever I didn't say, and led him to the bedroom.

I let him sit on the edge of the bed, while I turned a lamp on.  Then I stood in front of him, not hiding.

I started with my shirt, followed by my shoes and shorts.  Then I reached for him and helped him with his clothes.  Slowly.  My hands shook in anticipation.  My breath came out in ragged whispers.  The chill hit my exposed skin, and goose bumps spread all over.

"Maggie."  It almost sounded like a plea.  A tear rolled down my cheek when I bent down and removed his shoes and socks, one after the other.  I fumbled over his jeans, but he still wouldn't touch me.  Zach just let me undress him, and after every breath, he'd whisper my name.

After I was done, I straightened again and removed my bra and underwear.  My gaze met his.  I didn't cover my body.  I left myself exposed.  I let him see me before I claimed his lips again.

I trapped his face between my palms as we kissed, the type of kiss that burrowed to my soul.  With eyes closed, I ran my hands down his arms and intertwined my fingers with his.  I lifted both our hands over his head as I nudged him down on the bed, stretching my body along his.  The hard planes of his body didn't feel rigid to me.  With my lips, I roamed over his jaw, feeling the roughness of it on my lips, and continued down his neck.  I kissed the lines of his collarbones, down the center of his chest.  Then I pressed my ear to hear his heart beat for me, for him.

Every single second, a tear would drop, and I would sob.  

When I slipped lower, Zach let go of my hands, and he held my shoulders, stopping me from moving.  Instead of putting a stop to it, like I thought he would, he rolled me onto my back, and braced his arms along my sides.

Zach brushed the wet trails on my cheeks and placed soft kisses on them as he slid in me.  His body rocked, and I waited until my body adjusted to him.  His lips continued to move against my skin, like he was saying something to me, but I couldn't hear them.  Or maybe, he didn't want me to.  I didn't take a moment to figure out those soundless words.  All I could do was feel him, every part, every breath, every beat.  My hands were everywhere, on his back, gripping his arms, through his hair.  The heat of his lips felt as though they left burns on my skin.  

Time didn't matter.  All I had was Zach, and he had me, all of me.  We went on like this until I was pushed past the edge, and with him, I fell...and fell...and fell...

* * *

For the next few days, Zach and I got into a comfortable routine. He even let me use his truck to travel to and from his mother’s nursing facility and I was able to visit her whenever I wanted to. Lisa’s mood remained unpredictable, but Zach swore he’d seen positive changes since my first visit. I wasn’t a miracle worker, as he claimed. All I thought was if Zach was happy, his mother was as well. But he had difficulties seeing that.

He continued to focus on his training for the fight of his life, which helped take his mind away from any concerns on his mother, or so he’d told me. I knew in the back of his mind he had his mother’s condition, that he wasn’t just fighting for him; he was fighting for her. I’d watched him spar with some of his friends and oftentimes, I had to look away. There was nothing but determination in his eyes, in each purposeful move he’d make. He was a beast, a warrior in the cage. He executed each step with careful thought, and even though I’d never really seen an MMA match, there wasn’t any doubt he could win.

However, there was one day I’d overheard a couple of the guys training talking about Zach’s opponent. Lucas St. Honore had been a pro-fighter for much longer, and he’d been undefeated in the ring. I’d asked Zach about Lucas and all he did was smirked at me, called his opponent an asshat and asked me not to worry about it.

That proved difficult the next day when I attended a press conference and had the chance to watch Zach face his opponent in person. Lucas was taller than Zach, with broader shoulders, tattooes from head to toe, and an angrier demeanor. Throughout the media craziness, Zach kept a slight smirk on his face. I couldn’t get used to the flashes of the camera. I didn’t know how he did, but Zach kept calm, almost cocky. Questions were directed at them and either man answered or some rep replied for them. When it came to facing Lucas toe to toe, Zach kept his head high, proud, mighty, unmoveable. Somehow he spotted me in a back corner and winked. Then I caught sight of Lucas staring at me, and a slow intimidating grin spread on his lips. With the microphones out of the way, I couldn’t hear what Lucas said to Zach, but it was bad enough that Zach lost his cool. He’d charged at Lucas, snarling profanities at him. All the guys on the stage came between them and I could hear Rick yelling to save the fight for the octagon.

I was shaken by the whole thing and rushed to the back to talk to Zach but was turned away by his manager, Patton. I was out of my realm. Worse, Zach was out of my reach. After several minutes, Rick came and asked me to follow him, weaving through the back of the stage and through back hallways until we got through the backdoor to a waiting limo.

“Zach,” was all I could say as soon as I saw him inside but he barely shot me a glance. He had his head down and he punched his palm continuously until we arrived at his training center.

Rick pulled me aside while I waited for Zach by his truck. “Just give him a few minutes. He’ll be fine. That boy is the toughest of the lot.”

I nodded, not really understanding what had happened. What did Lucas tell him that got him so riled up? I might never know, and even if someone told me, I’d most likely have a hard time comprehending.

When Zach came out of the center, bee-lining for the truck, he kissed me on the cheek and to my surprise, didn’t say goodbye to Rick.

“Where are you guys headed?” his friend asked.

“Gonna see his Ma,” I replied.

“You driving?”

Before I could answer, we both watched Zach walk to the passenger side and slam the door behind him.

“I guess so.”

“Good. Take care.”

It was a quiet drive for the most part until Zach opened up. It turned out Zach and Lucas had been long time enemies, and I was too afraid to askany more details since I couldn’t get past how much bigger, seemingly more brutal-looking and intimidating this Lucas guy was than Zach. When I voiced my concern again, Zach chuckled and told me he could bring a man twice his size flat on the ground in a matter of seconds.

“Have faith, babe,” he said to me. And that was all I could hold on to. “As long as you’re there, I know I’ll beat the shit out of him.”

I nodded, recalling the night I’d promised him I’d attend the match but was honest enough to say I didn’t think I would be able to stomach watching the whole thing. I’d seen photos of men with their faces bashed in after these fights. I’d be fine to take care of Zach afterwards but to witness how he’d put his whole life on the line was another matter.

It was a bad day, and it was evident even before we stepped in Lisa’s bedroom. She was kicking and shouting hateful words at a couple of wards and her nurse. Zach hesitated at the door and I could see the war in his eyes. Should he help the staff or his mother? He’d been his mother’s protector for so long that I doubted he’d opt for the former, despite knowing his mother’s condition. When I placed a hand on his shoulder, they were harder than boulders in the canyon. His nostrils flared and his hands fisted at his sides. He was ready to hurt the people trying to help his Ma.

“Zach, wait outside. I’ll help here. You don’t need to see this,” I urged him. He didn’t move. He didn’t even look at me. His eyes filled with obsidian darkness. “Please. We’ll take care of her. I’ll take care of her.”

That he believed. He gripped my arm and when my gaze met his darkened one, it frightened me at first. This was the same rage I’d seen in him the night I’d woken up to his hand on my throat.

“I’m here,” I said again, trying to get through the nightmare he must be feeling.

He loosened his grip on my arm, and nodded before ducking out of the room. I went straight to Nurse Debbie’s side and helped as much as I could, which wasn’t much.

They’d eventually sedated her. Nurse Debbie informed me that it was a sudden change of mood, unexplainable, but she’d be out for the rest of the night and there was no point of us staying.

“You’re good with her. If you hadn’t showed up it would have been more difficult sedating her. You’r a natural caretaker, Maggie. Ever thought of nursing?” Nurse Debbie asked. I smiled at her and shook my head. “You should. You’re emphatic. You’re caring and you have patience.” She patted me on the shoulder before I left the room.

I had to explain to Zach that his Ma would be asleep the entire night, and he didn’t say anything. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration and stomped out of the building.

To think of how he’d have to go through this for years, to feel helpless, to feel like he couldn’t do anything for his mother, hurt me more than I ever thought. Only now did I trulyunderstood his determination to win. He saw this as his one and only opportunity. Lucas St. Honore better watch out. There wasn’t anyone more dangerous than a man with a purpose, with a lot on the line.

When we got to his apartment, it was more evident how hard he’d taken the entire day, heading straight to the shower without a word to me. We’d ordered pizza, which he barely touched. And soon after, he went to bed.

After cleaning up after our meal, I readied for bed and brushed my teeth. While I patted my face with a towel to dry it off after washing it, Zach came into view in the mirror. He’d gotten a haircut the other day in preparation for the press conference, but he still brushed a hand over his forehead. I watched him approach me with his head ducked low. From behind, he wrapped strong arms around my waist and he pressed his lips on my shoulder.

“I love you,” he whipered against my skin. I closed my eyes, letting myself get lost in his words, and reached up to cup his cheek. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Maggie.” I felt a wetness touch my thumb on his cheek and it rolled down to my shoulder. “I’m lost without you.”

I brought my hand down and pivoted, opening my eyes and cupping his cheeks with my palms. He’d cried a single tear but it was enough to tell me how afraid he was. It was enough for me to believe that he was a lost boy, and he looked to me for guidance. What did I know? I was young, naïve, inexperienced. But I understood pain. I understood heartbreak. I took his hand and pressed my lips on his.

“You need sleep,” I said in a hushed tone, inhaling his breath as we touched the tips of our noses together. He nodded and let me lead him to bed.

* * *

“I don’t want to get out of bed,” Zach said, snuggling closer to me. The sun was just starting to brighten the sky.

The whole night, Zach held onto me. His long legs tangled with mine, his arms circled me and I curved my body against him, in his warm cocoon. He’d had a restless sleep and I worried the entire night that he’d attack again while I was asleep. But I remembered the way he looked in the bathroom and whatever protective wall I built would tumble.

When dusk came, we made love. It was tender, but full of fervor. We breathed each other in, our lips tasting one another, bodies touching. Throughout it all, our hands were intertwined. I opened my eyes after my climax and all I could see was the earnest in his eyes when he whispered how much he loved me.

“You have training,” I reminded him.

He groaned and buried his nose in my hair. “They’ll have to come and pry me out of bed if they want me to do anything today.”

I laughed, imagining how Travis or Rick wouldn’t think twice of doing that if Zach insisted on staying in bed. “We’ll take it slow. We’ll have a hearty breakfast, have a shower together then you can go training.”

“I’d rather have you for breakfast,” he teased and his hands roamed between my thighs.

I swallowed my moan. “You need to get up. You know the guys won’t let you skip today. And now that I’ve seen Lucas, I don’t think I can let you skip training either.”

“Why? You don’t think I can beat him?” I’d be worried with his question if his voice didn’t have a teasing tone. “I can beat him with one hand behind my back and my eyes closed.”

“You’re so cocky.”

“Hmmm. You know it, but you still love me.”

“That I do.” I caressed his cheek , the tear had long died, and smiled at him when my stomach grumbled. “See. I’m starving. I’ll make us breakfast.” I kissed him again, longer, deeper, before slipping out of bed, despite his protest.

I was glad I had the mind to dress in one of his shirts and put on underwear before leaving the bedroom. I released a little yelp as soon as I spotted the girl with a dog on the couch.

“Oh good. I thought you’d never be done,” she said as she stood, flicking a curly blonde hair over her shoulder.

I squinted, trying to place her familiar face. But I recognized the dog first. It was the same dog in the only photograph in Zach’s apartment, which acoording to him was a dog he used to have. My eyes flew to it, then to her.

She’d put the dog down on the floor. “Go find daddy. and it immediately ran to the bedroom.”

“Who are you?” I asked as soon as I found my voice. She scoffed and rolled her eyes, ignoring my question as she headed to follow after her dog. On its own volition, my hand grabbed her arm and turned her to face me. “Who the hell are you and what are you doing in Zach’s apartment?”

“You mean our apartment?” the blonde said. She sneered at me and yanked free of my grip.

“What?”

Zach appeared soon after, with the dog at his heel. Anger washed over his face, but it was mixed with something else when his gaze flitted to me. “What are you doing here?” he shouted at the blonde who neared him.

“I missed you,” the girl said in a sweet, sultry voice. All I could do was watch her fondle Zach’s naked chest. He’d had the mind to put on a pair of pants, but I was already shaking and my mind brought me back to the night of my birthday. At the club. Amongst the sea of people, she stood out. The blonde girl who’d watched me.

Zach grabbed her hand. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

Before she could reply, I said her name out loud, “Kenzie. She’s…” I looked at Zach. Fear intensified in his eyes. “This is her apartment? That’s your dog?” I pointed at the furry animal by their feet. “Oh my god.”

I ran to the bedroom before I lost it. I couldn’t believe it was happening again. The betrayal gripped my throat. With shaky fingers, I pulled a pair of shorts, a bra and a shirt on. I grabbed my phone and my purse. Almost tripping at the yapping dog, I didn’t bother looking at Zach or Kenzie, his ex-girlfriend, or girlfriend, I wasn’t sure, before letting the door slam behind me.