CHAPTER FOUR

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

W hen she opened her eyes, the morning sunshine illuminated her dorm room. A new day had arrived. Her head ached; a result of too much booze and far too many tears. The pillow had never been more inviting. As her head nestled into the sack of feathers she closed her eyes, refusing to start the day. Only she couldn’t fall back to sleep.

The encounter with her ex had rattled her. She rolled over and her eyes shot open. It hadn’t been a sick and twisted dream. He was really there. Benny Wilder was back, and he wanted a second chance. A ripple of arousal raced across her body.

The prospect of being with him again wasn’t as repulsive as it should have been. The man had broken her heart. Now he wanted an opportunity to make it right; or do it again. She couldn’t be sure of his motives. Their conversation replayed in her mind, leaving her with more questions than answers. His charm had been every bit as alluring as always. She blamed the booze for almost kissing him. She shouldn’t give into temptation.

No matter how handsome or how fucking good he smelled; he was still the enemy.

No matter how much her body craved his touch; she had to stay away. Right?

What kind of doormat would she be, if she took him back? No, she had to stay away. She had too much self-esteem to crawl back to an ex who’d tossed her aside like a used condom. Beth rolled over again and punched the pillow, but it did nothing to soothe her conflicted soul. Not when the devil himself invaded her thoughts. Every time she closed her eyes, images of Benny rushed in.

“Morning,” Carly said from across the room, scaring her half to death.

“Don’t sneak up on people! When did you get here?” Her heart was in her throat. She hadn’t heard her roommate come home. She peered over and she was dressed in her work outfit: jeans and a black t-shirt. The country diner where she worked had a retro vibe, but they didn’t insist on their waitresses wearing period specific clothing. Though, Beth thought Carly would look awesome in a poodle skirt.

“I’ve been far too loud to be sneaky. I take it you’re more than a little hungover?”

Pushing her palms against her eyes soothed the sting from the daylight. “I’ve had better days. Why don’t you keep clothes at Theo’s? We all know it’s only a matter of time before you officially move in.” Beth’s voice sounded like she’d eaten a pack of cotton balls.

Carly scoffed. “I have no intention of moving out of this room until I have a degree in my hand. As amazing as Theo is, he gets that. Besides, I couldn’t leave you. Like it or not, you’re stuck with me bestie!”

“Awe, you’re sweet. Theo’s rubbing off on you because the misfit I met in September would never have said anything so sappy.” A pillow landed against her face. She hugged it to her chest and rolled onto her side. “He’s a rare soul. You both are. I’m glad I won’t need to break in a new roommate any time soon.”

“He is awesome, isn’t he? Speaking of sappy, he’s driving me to work before he heads to the rink so we can spend extra time together.”

Beth rolled her eyes and put her finger in her mouth. “Gross. I might barf yet.” She tossed the pillow back at Carly.

“That would make sense given how much you drank. You looked like a woman on a mission. Did Joe do anything to upset you? If he so much as harmed a hair on your head, I’ll kill him.”

“Joe didn’t do anything. You can relax.”

“I got concerned when you disappeared halfway through the night.”

She rubbed her eyes and yawned. “Sorry about that. I should have found you and said goodbye before I left.”

“Joe said you’d had too much to drink and needed to sleep it off. I’ve never known you to over indulge. What’s up?” Carly stood with her hands on her curvy hips. There’s no way she would accept being put off.

Beth blew out a large breath. Sitting up, she looked down at her wrinkled dress. The room tilted slightly but recovered. “My ex showed up. The one I told you broke my heart.”

“Bob? No, that’s not it. Brian. Damn, I’m rotten with names.”

“Benny. Wilder.” She gave her friend a moment to let the name sink in. She’d given her friend the abbreviated version of her dating history over the past months. They shared secrets and relationship failures. The women had both been scorned by hockey players. She’d told Carly she didn’t believe in love because it was fickle. Something Benny had taught her.

Carly’s eyes widened as the pieces fell into place. “You never told me your ex played in the NHL. He didn’t just show up; he’s here permanently. Well, as permanent as hockey allows. Fuck!” She flipped her auburn hair over her shoulder.

“Pretty much took the words out of my mouth.” She needed to brush her teeth. The flavors of mixed alcohol were less than pleasant.

“Did you two talk? What did he say? Wow, you have to tell me everything,” Carly said, crossing the room to sit next to her.

Beth twisted the sheets in her hand. “There’s not much to tell. He said he wants me back and we almost kissed.” She covered her face in her hands. Would it have been so wrong to feel his lips one more time?

“Oh, hell no. You didn’t? Tell me you didn’t.” Carly’s voice rose with indignation.

Beth remained silent. They hadn’t kissed, but she’d wanted to. Her lips still craved a taste.

“He treated you like shit. Isn’t this the same guy who dumped you the same week your dad died?”

She had it right. That happened. “Relax. We didn’t kiss.” She removed her hand from her face. “By the way, you have a great memory. Yes, Benny was traded the same week my dad fell into the coma. He moved and never talked to me again.”

Her eyes welled with tears. She’d been so close with her dad. They were two peas in a pod. There wasn’t a day that went by that she didn’t miss him like crazy. She’d needed Benny’s support, and he’d gone MIA. The last message she ever received from him was the day her dad passed away: I’m sorry. Two words that weren’t nearly enough.

“Okay, so he’s back. No big deal. It’s not like you’re going to give him the time of day. You’re dating Joe and seeing where that goes. Right?”

“Except, Joe and I aren’t dating. He’s Mr. Playing-The-Field and I’m not interested in any more games. We’re attracted to each other, but I don’t think it’s enough. We’re more friends than anything.”

“So, you want to give Mr. Asshole-Of-The-Century another shot?”

Beth crawled out of bed and paced the tiny space. “I’m confused. To be honest, I never expected to see him again. I expected hatred to be the number one emotion to surface if our paths ever happened to cross. But that’s not how I feel. In my head he’s a monster, but he’s also a man. A fucking sexy one at that. It’s totally wrong that I want him. Isn’t it?”

“You’re human. How long has it been since you had sex?”

Her cheeks flushed. This tidbit wasn’t something she’d shared. “Let me think.” She counted the months since Benny moved. “Over two years,” she answered bashfully.

“You haven’t had sex with anyone since him? None of the players you’ve dated. Not even Joe?” Carly’s mouth hung open in disbelief.

“Not everyone has sex on a first date. Don’t look at me like that. I haven’t been in a serious relationship since he dumped me. That’s not so shocking.” She pulled a bottle of water out of her backpack and chugged the contents.

Carly closed her mouth and shook her head. “You’re right. But hormones can cloud our otherwise good judgment. Don’t take him back. That’s my two cents. There’s no excuse for being that rotten.”

She was right. Nothing he could say would change the past. “He wanted to talk, but I wouldn’t listen. Then I think the chemistry between us took the reins. I took off before I did something I’d regret.”

“It’s not crazy for the attraction to linger. We don’t get to choose who we fall for. I never would have picked Theo, but fate put us together and I couldn’t be happier.”

Fate. She worked her magic for some people and tortured others. Cruel woman.

“You guys are meant for each other. I thought the same thing about Benny once. He’s a few years older than me, but we had so much in common. Our conversations were easy, and I thought the stars had aligned for us too. Hell, I’d skipped going to University after high school so we could spend more time together. We were so in love at one time. I still don’t understand what happened then or last night.”

“Do you still feel something for him?” Carly’s phone rang, and she silenced it.

“A whole lot of something and it’s freaking me out. Benny’s presence gives me goosebumps. I can’t explain it, but even though I should hate him, I don’t.”

“That prick will feel my wrath,” Carly said, shaking her fist at the ceiling.

“Please don’t. I’ll ignore him and get over the attraction.” She hoped the last statement was possible. Besides, she wouldn’t ever have to see him again, if she didn’t want to. Winnipeg was a big city.

“Are you okay, like really okay?” Carly tilted her head to the side like she was talking to a child.

Beth smiled. “I’m fine.” In reality she was anything but. In a few weeks this would all blow over. Until then she’d concentrate on school.

“Oh, fuck nuts! I accidentally gave out your number. This happened before I knew your history. Last night, Benny asked Joe for your number while we were all standing there. Joe said no, like an upstanding guy, but I gave it to him.” She held up her hands in surrender.

“Carly, why?”

“He claimed you guys had something to discuss. Sorry, but I got mad on your behalf because Joe was draped over some other girl. I figured it would make him jealous. I didn’t see the harm, seeing as he plays with the guys. It was a mistake.”

“Fuck. That sucks.” She clutched her bag and sat back down.

Her phone buzzed again. “Maybe he won’t call. Shit. I’m so sorry. If I wasn’t working I’d stay and chat, but I’m gonna be late and Theo’s waiting outside. I love you!” She blew an air kiss as she ran out the door.

Beth’s hangover had started to dissipate. She found her purse and looked at her phone. Ten missed calls. All from the same unknown number. Benny.