Chapter Twenty-Six – Kris

 

“Wait,” Tabitha said, her voice exhausted, her eyes red-rimmed and bloodshot. She looked worse than I did as we stood in the middle of her circle, with her desperately trying to stay upright without wobbling. And I’d even been shot at multiple times the night before. “You want me to stop looking into the PDB? Why?”

I crossed my arms more tightly over my chest. “Because I’m on board, that’s why. I don’t need you digging any more than you already have. It’s not safe.”

“It’s not safe?” she asked. “What the fuck do you think I’m standing in, Kris? None of this shit is safe! I don’t deal with safe, you don’t deal with safe, none of us deals with safe! We don’t deal with safe!”

“That’s not what I mean,” I said, pinching the bridge of my nose. Don’t get me wrong, she was right, on pretty much every level. But not like this. These people weren’t the usual group, and I knew it. “Look, Tabitha,” I continued, reaching for her hands, “I’m joining the colonel, and that’s it. End of discussion.”

She looked down at her hands in mine, blonde eyebrow raised, before yanking them away. “So, let me get this straight? Whoever it is that you’re going up against sent hitmen after you, with bullets specifically to kill a dragon, and you don’t want to know more about who you’re joining, or what you’re going up against. This is ludicrous, Kris!”

“Look, Harrington and I think his organization has a leak, okay?” I said. “We know it’s not you, but he thinks you poking the ant pile while you’re looking around isn’t going to help matters. Especially not with your contacts.”

“Oh, I see,” she said, nodding emphatically. “So, his organization has leaks he knows about, but suddenly my contacts are too risky. His organization is the one who got you shot at, but I’m the one who might make things worse.”

I sighed, looking to the ceiling. “That’s not what I’m saying, Tabitha. I’m just saying that I’m out of the organization, and you don’t need to feel beholden to me, okay? That’s why you can stop looking into it. I’ve already made my decision.”

“Kris, these guys took a shot at my fucking boss!”

“Not anymore,” I said, my voice pleading. “Please, Tabitha, understand where I’m coming from here. I’m not your boss anymore. Harrington doesn’t want anyone else on this thing. Just me.”

“Why just you?” she asked. “Seriously? Why not the rest of the guys? Or me, even?”

I shrugged. “Because I don’t have anything to lose.” I swallowed a lump in my throat. “All I’ve got is my service, Tabitha. My stupid duty.”

“We have that, too,” she said, her voice abruptly soft. “Duty, I mean. Service. I don’t have anyone, either, Kris. You’re really my only friend, for chrissakes.”

I flared my nostrils, took a deep breath. She was my only friend, too, when I thought about it. Kind of weird to admit something like that, even to yourself.

“I know you have your duty. And the colonel knows it, too. Knows it about each and every one of you. He or I could snap our fingers, and you or any of the guys would jump at the chance to go fight whatever this is, and we know it as surely as I know the sky is blue, and gravity makes you fall. Don’t you see, that’s why I’m the one who has to go.”

“You agree with him, then? That we should all stay out of this?” She gestured to the room around her. “Just, you know, stay in our hole?”

I sighed. One hand on my hip, the other crossed and locked around my wrist, all I could think to do was nod. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I do. He just doesn’t want you guys throwing your lives away, but he knows you will. And he knows the guys will think it’s a slight if they find out.”

Tabitha sighed. “But we’re a team, Kris. You can’t just break us up like this.”

“What’re you talking about?” I asked, smiling a little. “I’ve been gone for three months, and this place hasn’t fallen apart. You’re all doing your jobs, hunting down ghosts and goblins and such, and still taking care of the normal ones. Who’s saying this place won’t work without me around?”

She frowned, shook her head. “It still just doesn’t feel right. None of this does. You just leaving the agency like this. What do I even tell the guys?”

Now it was my turn to frown as I looked away. I didn’t even want to think about having to tell the guys. Goodbyes are never easy, especially when you’re talking about saying them to men you’ve bled with, men you’ve sweated with, been shot at with. Whatever happened, they’d always be my brothers-in-arms.

“I don’t know,” I said, my voice quiet. “You’ll come up with something, though. Maybe just tell them I’m retiring. Going to live on some beach somewhere, like Aruba or some shit.”

“Bora Bora, I think. That’s a good one they’ll never look up.”

I laughed, feeling a smile grow on my face before dying again. I shrugged. “Whatever it is, it’s got to be better than what Harrington did, right?”

Tabitha snorted. “Well, not much could be worse.” She paused, looked down at her feet. The rings under her eyes were somehow more obvious from this angle, and I had a sudden pang of regret for how little I’d thanked Tabitha over the years for her work. Even if it was part of her service and duty, and doing her part, same as for everyone else. She looked back at me. “I just don’t want to lose you, that’s all.”

“I know,” I said, putting my arms out and pulling her into my embrace. “Thank you,” I whispered as I hugged her close. “Thank you for more than you know. You’ve made this place bearable, some days. And I know you’ll take good care of your guys.”

“They’re your guys too, you know,” she said.

“Not anymore,” I replied, smiling a little. “Passing that torch over your way.”

“When do you leave?” she asked as we pulled apart.

“Soon,” I said. “Real soon.”

As if on cue, Tabitha’s phone chimed with the front door’s intercom, which fed to each of the phones in the office.

“You expecting someone?” she asked as I stepped out of the circle and went to answer the call.

“Kind of, yeah,” I said as I picked up the receiver and put it to my ear. “Kris Cole, Full Moon Security. How can we be of assistance?”

“Hello, Kris,” the voice on the other end of the line said in a distinctly matron-like British accent. No surprise about who it was, either. I’d grown to almost dread the sound of her voice over the last year when she’d call in to give us small jobs here and there, or tip us off to bigger supernatural cases somewhere else in the country. “Imogen Smith. Mind if I come in for a little chat?”

“Of course. I’ll be right down.” I hung up the phone and turned back to Tabitha.

“Already?” she asked, stepping out of the circle.

“Already. Think he knew which way I was going to swing before even I did.”

“He was always good at this kind of thing. Look at how he got all of us in here.”

“Yeah,” I said, nodding absently. I let out a long, tired sigh. “Well, I better go get her. And you, Tabitha, should go get some sleep.”

“Don’t tempt me,” she said, sagging down in her chair.

“Tempt you? I’m fucking ordering you.”

“But—”

“No buts,” I said, cutting her off. “I’m still your boss until otherwise noted. Now, get some rest. And not in that cot I know you keep off in the corner, either. I want you home, and in bed. You look like death warmed over.”

“Geez, Kris, you really know how to sweet talk a girl.”

I chuckled. “Look, I’ll try to drop by before I leave. But, if I can’t…”

She didn’t say anything, even as I trailed off. Her eyes just grew a little distant, as if she were looking somehow past this room and deep into the past. Maybe to the first time we’d met, or the first time we’d worked a case file together. I didn’t know, but it was the second time I teared up that day.

I turned and went to leave.

“Hey, Kris,” Tabitha said as I pulled open her workshop door.

“Yeah?”

“I’m going to miss you.”

“Going to miss you, too, Tabs. See you when I can, okay?”

She wiped a hand across the bottom of her eye as she sniffled a little. “Yeah. Same here.”

Gently, I closed the door behind me, and headed down to the front door. I’d been keeping Agent Imogen Smith waiting for long enough already.