Chapter Twenty-One
Trent
She’s finally free. Free to live the life she was meant to. Clove was never mine to begin with; she was always my brother’s. Even when she told me she loved me, she was his. And yet, I held onto that little thread of hope that she would eventually fall in love with me, forgive me for all the wrong I had done to her.
The funny thing about a black soul is that, no matter how much you might want to save it, when it’s too far down in the abyss of hell, life gives up on it, leaving it there without a second glance. I lived my entire life in that abyss, until I met her.
She knew the entire time I was with her that I wasn’t him, and yet she let me in just the tiniest bit to see the true meaning of love. I was blinded by her beauty. My jealousy of her love for him burned fire through my veins, leading me to attempt to kill my own brother. I will never be able to convince anyone that I am thankful he survived so Clove doesn’t have to suffer anymore.
Now I lay in here handcuffed to this hospital bed watching the morning news as reports from all over the country mock me, throwing in my face the fact that both Tina and Caleb are out on bail. I don’t know what Caleb will do, but I have no doubt in my mind that Tina will make a run for it and disappear, but not before she tries to seek revenge on Clove.
Tina has a way of manipulating people with her fake charisma. The way she can light up a room with that persona makes you believe anything that comes out of her mouth. She plots and schemes, forcing even the strongest person to bend to her will. And then when she finally has you right where she wants you, she will lure you into doing any damn thing she wants.
I have never hated someone more in my life, not even my father who was just as high on the ‘fucked up in the head’ scale as she is. Little did I know the bullshit Tina blew straight up my ass was filled with lies. The day she told me she planned on killing her daughter was the day I decided there was no way in hell I was going to let her. So I planned, waited as long as I could to help Clove escape and get back to her life with my brother and their baby, but Tina fucked that shit up, too.
A picture of Tina leaving her house last night pops up on the television screen, her car swarmed by the media as she tries to weave her way out of her gated driveway. She’s free and here I am stuck in this bed with no way to warn or help Clove and her family. I flick the television off, not wanting to see any more of this shit. Instead, I turn my gaze to the window and enjoy one of the last days I will see the sun rising.
I’m smart enough to know I will be spending the rest of my life in prison for the crimes I have committed. I deserve it. I took an innocent family, my own family, and tore their lives apart, all for money.
I don’t feel sorry for myself, not one goddamn bit. I feel sorry for the mother and brother I will never know because it was me who brought this to their doorstep. Me, who became so obsessed with wanting the life that Turner had to be my own. I cannot erase this past year. I’m helpless, trapped in a room just like Clove was. And now I know exactly how she felt to be separated from the people you love. I haven’t seen her beautiful face for days now. I miss everything about her. I always will.
I think back to a few days ago when Tina told me she was taking Clove and Journey, either with or without me. I did my best to try and convince her to just take Journey and leave. We fought hard, screaming and yelling at each other. The realization that I was trying to save Clove tipped her over the edge. She pulled out her gun and shot me point blank in the stomach.
Such a fool I was. I should have beaten the shit out of her, or grabbed my own gun and blown her fucking head off, then taken the two of them and run while I had the chance. Instead, all I could do was claw my way down the stairs to the front door in a trail of blood, trying not to pass out from the pain as I tried to get to them before it was too late.
That mistake will haunt me forever. I should have stopped this way before that day ever came, but my selfishness in wanting to keep Clove stood in the way. Now all I have left is hope. Hope that Clove and Turner and their beautiful little daughter can move past this and live. Hope that the love that they have for each other can survive. I’m confident that being home with her family again is a start to help to heal, to have everything she deserves and more.
A knock at my door takes me away from these painful thoughts. My head turns toward the sound as I watch the FBI agent assigned to keep watch over me go to answer it. The door closes as he steps out and the sound of Clove’s brother’s loud voice has me wincing in pain as I push the button on the bed to sit myself up. I refuse to take pain meds. The pain I welcome, I deserve.
The door opens and in walks Zack followed by my lawyer and several agents, along with the District Attorney and my doctor. The lawyer I have spoken only a few words to. I don’t need him. I plead guilty, so why in the hell is he even here?
“What the hell is going on?” I say through gritted teeth, the pain so damn intense in my stomach, it’s difficult to even breathe.
“I’ll tell you what’s going on, asshole. Your lovely girlfriend disappeared last night. Any idea where she might be?”
Zack’s heated glare along with the hot tone of his voice pisses me the hell off.
“How the fuck would I know where she is? I knew this shit would happen. I fucking knew it would. Now she won’t stop until she has her revenge on Clove. Jesus Christ.”
I sink back into my pillows, my thoughts immediately going to Clove’s safety. I would give anything to be able to see her right now, if only to make sure she was all right.
“You let me worry about my sister, you’re nothing to her. Now where the hell is my mother?”
His heated glare burns into me, showing he is ready to attack. Fuck him. He can. I welcome it.
“I told you, I have no clue where that bitch could be. You’re the super cop, so you tell me,” I say condescendingly.
I decide to leave his jab about Clove not being my business alone. It doesn’t matter where I am, she will always be my business.
“You’re a fucking liar!” he shouts, looming over my bed. “You’ve been with her for over a year, you piece of shit. You know damn well where she would go.”
“Didn’t you hear what I said? I have no clue where she is,” I say harshly.
“Fuck you! You have all but destroyed my sister, not to mention your brother. I swear to God, you’d better tell me.”
“Or what?” I yell. “Are you going to kill me? Make my life a living hell? Beat me to death? Well bring it on, motherfucker, because there isn’t a damn thing you can do to me that I wouldn’t do to myself if I could. I love her.”
We engage in a stare down, but he knows damn well I can’t do shit in here.
“You love her?” he scoffs. “Let me tell you what love is, asshole. Love is what Clove and Turner have for each other. Love is the daughter they made together. Love is about family, and protecting them. It sure as fuck isn’t about kidnapping and stalking and pretending to be someone else. And if I didn’t love my family as much as I do, I would fucking kill you.”
“Zack. Enough. We will take it from here,” says one of the agents.
He places his hand on Zack’s shoulder, but Zack shrugs him off.
“Fuck that shit! You won’t rest until the two of you have completely destroyed her, will you? My sister got one night, one goddamn night alone with her family in their new home, and now I have to go over there and crush her, and tell her my mother has disappeared.”
He turns and lashes out at the agents
“You’d better make sure this son of a bitch co-operates with you, or I swear to God I will make him myself. I’ll be waiting in the chopper. Get this asshole to talk. I need to get to my sister.”
He turns on his heel and slams the door on his way out.
“I want charges pressed against him for threatening my client,” my lawyer pipes up.
“Jesus Christ! Would you shut up?” I spew at him in anger. “What the hell are you doing here, anyway? I told you I didn’t want your help.”
His shoulders square back, his beady little eyes squint.
“Well, if you want to spend the rest of your life in prison then I can leave, but if you don’t then you will listen and do everything that these men here ask you to do.”
The DA pulls out a tablet and begins typing into it.
“Are you telling us you have no idea where she could have gone, Mr. Calloway?”
“That’s what I said, isn’t it?”
I stand my ground. I have no clue where she could be. Skipped the country, I hope.
“Now hold up, here,” the doctor pipes up. “I agreed to let all of you in here to talk to my patient and I specifically told you his health is my top priority. This is not a jail cell, this is a hospital room, and I will not stand here and watch you get him all worked up. Do I make myself clear, gentlemen?”
They all take a step away from me while the doctor pulls the drape closed and lifts my gown to examine my wound. I’m no help with one arm in a sling and the other cuffed to this bed.
“The wounds seem to be healing nicely. Are you sure you don’t want anything for your pain?” he asks for the hundredth time.
“No. I’m fine,” I snap.
“Well, I am staying in here until they finish up with you. It’s my call, not yours or anyone else’s, if I think they have pushed you too far, understand?”
I nod and he opens the curtain back up.
The DA gets right down to business, no time wasted as he offers me a plea bargain to help reel in Tina.
“We’re prepared to offer you a fifteen to twenty year sentence in a maximum security federal prison instead of life if you can help us find her. That’s one hell of a bargain, Mr. Calloway, considering all the crimes you have committed,” he says with authority.
“It’s a hell of a deal and one I agree you should take,” says my lawyer.
“So, let me get this straight. You want me to help you find her? How in the hell am I supposed to do that when one, I have no clue where she is, and two, I have no idea how I could possibly help you?”
“That’s for me to worry about. If you agree, we will set this plan in motion and do whatever is necessary to get her back to Atlanta.”
“I’ll agree to do whatever it is you want me to. You name it and I’ll do it, but the first thing you need to do is make sure Clove and her family are safe. You let her slip through your fingers once; she’ll do it again. On top of the fact that she’s fucking crazy, she has nothing to lose. That bitch doesn’t care about anything else but making her daughter pay for her not getting what she wanted.”
The D.A. and his entourage gather their things and head for the door.
“You're making the right decision,” my lawyer says.
I don’t even know what the fuck his name is, and I don’t give a shit, either. My only concern right now is finding the bitch who put me in the hospital and destroyed my life as well as my family.
“My family,” I laugh at myself.
They aren’t my family. None of them are. I have no family. No life. Nothing. I could lay here and blame my father for the shit I have done, but the bottom line is I had a choice, and I chose wrong.
After they all leave, I drift in and out of sleep restlessly, my thoughts on where in the hell Tina could be. I haven’t an indication at all. When I finally open my eyes, my vision is blurry at first. I tilt my head to the side, my eyes becoming clearer as I stare at the fair-haired woman sitting in a chair in the corner, with her hands in her lap and tears in her eyes.
“Mom?” I rasp out.
She stands with grace and comes to hover over me at the end of the bed.
“Hello, Trent.”
What do you say to the woman who gave you life? A complete stranger who stands at the end of the bed, unrecognizable to her son.
“What are you doing here?” I ask.
“I… I’m not really sure, to be quite honest,” she admits, stumbling over her words. “I tried to sleep last night and couldn’t, so I booked the first flight I could find. I guess I just needed to see you.”
I can barely stand to look at her. Not because I don’t want to. She’s beautiful, more so than any of the pictures I have seen of her or the times I saw her from afar with Clove when I was stalking her every move. It’s because she has guilt written all over her face.
“Well, here I am. In the flesh,” I say facetiously, my tone an attempt to protect me from the emotions that threaten.
She just looks at me, her face solemn. For some reason, that look has me feeling embarrassed, a letdown to my own mother for the things I have done. Finally she sighs and begins talking.
“I’ve made so many mistakes in my life, Trent. The biggest one was not looking for you harder. I have no excuse for that. It’s something I have lived with ever since the day your father took you from me. I could stand here and tell you I was young and naïve, but that would be lying to you. The fact is that I chose one of my sons over the other.”
Her shoulders slump as she continues.
“I cannot help you for the all the wrong you have done. But I can show you that it’s not too late for me to be your mother. I never once stopped loving you, Trent, but I failed you as a parent. I was a coward, and I’m asking for your forgiveness. Please forgive me for not being the mother that you deserved. You’re part of me, Trent, one of the best parts. Let me be your mother. I will welcome you with open arms if you’ll open yours and welcome me. I love you, son.”
I’ve never been a man to cry. My father believed that a man never shows his weakness, and crying was weak. I sure knew better than to cry in front of him while I was growing up. I did, once, after falling down and skinning my knees. After he beat the shit out of me, I vowed never to cry again.
But here today, in front of this complete stranger who is stripping herself bare before my very eyes, I cry. For every damned day of my life that I have been without her, I cry like a newborn baby.
All of a sudden her arms are around me, comforting me with the motherly love I have craved my entire life. More love than I deserve.
“I’m not even worthy of you being here. Or to even be called your son,” I mumble as she continues to hold me.
“That’s not true,” she says. “A mother’s love is unconditional. I’m the one who’s not worthy after letting you down the way I did, but today, the two of us are going to have a fresh start.”
I close my eyes as a foreign sensation washes over me. I wonder what it is, until it hits me. For the first time in my life, I am feeling what it truly is like to be loved.