My head was in a whirl on the walk back from the farm. The pain in my knee had subsided but the much-needed phone conversation with my mum was playing over and over in my mind. What was I going to say? And how was she going to react? I had no idea.
The second I stepped into the hallway of Wild Rose Cottage, Grace beckoned me into the kitchen.
‘You look like you’ve got the worries of the world on your shoulders,’ she noted, placing two glasses of water on to the table alongside the mouth-watering prawn salad she’d prepared for dinner.
‘You don’t say. That was an afternoon I wasn’t expecting,’ I said, deflated, kicking off my pumps and plonking myself down heavily on the kitchen chair.
I blew out a breath and folded my arms on the kitchen table. Immediately the smile slid from Grace’s face. ‘It’s serious, isn’t it? What’s happened?’
For the next ten minutes I told Grace everything, from the discovery of the secret room to the newspaper article and the unexpected arrival of Grandie, home from the hospital, and our emotionally draining chat.
‘That’s an awful lot to take in.’
I nodded. ‘Am I okay to ring Mum before we eat?’ I was frightened that if I didn’t call her that very second, I wouldn’t do it at all.
‘Of course you can, the food will keep.’
‘Thanks, Grace.’
‘You must be genuinely considering Ted’s proposal, otherwise there would be no need to mention it at all to your mum,’ she raised her eyebrows at me.
‘You know what, Grace Anderson? Sometimes you are just too clever for your own good. All I can do is give her the choice to do it with me.’
‘Not just a pretty face,’ she grinned. ‘Good luck.’
Feeling nervous, I disappeared upstairs clutching my phone and settled cross-legged on my bed. With my heart thumping, I braced myself. This was the hardest conversation I was ever likely to have with Mum, but she must have known there was a possibility that once I was here, I might not want to go back.
Was it such a crazy plan to up sticks to England and move into Honeysuckle Farm, leaving my life in New York behind?
‘You can do this, Alice.’ The words rattled inside my head over and over again. ‘The sooner you talk to her about this, the better it’ll be.’
Deep breaths, deep breaths.
Feeling apprehensive, I began to dial the number.
Needless to say, the second the phone connected I was shaking like a leaf. My head was throbbing and my hands were sweaty but there was no going back. I couldn’t play piggy in the middle forever.
After three rings, Mum picked up the phone.
‘Hi Mum, how are you?’
‘Alice, it’s lovely to hear from you. It’s stifling hot and the air conditioning is playing up, but I mustn’t grumble. What’s the weather like there?’
‘Sunny at the moment but we’ve had a lot of rain too. I’ve been to The Old Teashop café for cake. Dorothy and Bert pass on their best and said it would be lovely to see you again.’
‘How lovely of them both, pass on my best too.’
‘Grace and Connie say hi,’ I chirped, thinking I would lead her into the next conversation gently.
‘Are you getting on okay?’ she asked.
‘Yes, it’s like we’ve never been apart.’
Then there was a slight awkward silence, but it was now or never.
‘Mum,’ my voice faltered, ‘there’s something I need to talk to you about.’
Again silence.
‘Are you still there?’ I checked, feeling uneasy while fiddling with the top of my sock.
‘I’m here,’ she said finally, her voice quivering. Deep down I think she knew the conversation with Grandie would happen sooner rather than later. I tried to keep my voice upbeat: ‘I’ve been back to Honeysuckle Farm and guess what, Marley is still there and Billy. I couldn’t believe it.’ I knew I was beginning to babble.
I could hear Mum breathing on the other end of the phone and could visualise her sitting at the kitchen table, staring out of the window.
‘How lovely.’
There was another long pause.
‘And I’ve visited Grandie in hospital, but he’s back home now.’ There, the word Grandie was out in the open, hanging in the air, so there was no going back. I decided to bite the bullet and just keep talking. Even if she wasn’t going to enter into a conversation about him, at least I knew I had her attention and she was listening.
‘He’s had a fall.’
Still Mum didn’t say anything.
‘He’s okay, but he’s very frail, Mum.’
I thought I heard a sniffle at the other end of the line – or was it just a crackle? – I couldn’t quite decide.
‘There’s something else too.’
‘What is it, love?’
I was taken aback by the sound of her voice. She definitely sounded shaky. I knew I had to tread very carefully.
‘He’s not getting any younger and I think the time has come when he wants to put all his affairs in order, for his own peace of mind. He wants to give me the farm, Mum, and the annexe, but there’s one condition.’
‘Which is?’ She spoke slowly but I could hear the intrigue in her voice.
‘He also wants to give me the dancing school. He wants me to move back to England and re-open it as a business.’
I heard a sharp intake of breath from the other end of the line.
‘We could do this together, Mum, we could move back to England and re-open the dance school together in partnership.’
For a moment, there was silence.
‘I’m sure that wasn’t your grandfather’s suggestion.’
‘It’s my suggestion. We could work together, doing what we both love doing best … singing and dancing, nurturing talent, preparing them for auditions. Our very own business … me and you in partnership.’ Even I could hear the sudden excitement and enthusiasm in my own voice.
‘I’m sure that isn’t what your grandfather wants.’
‘But it’s what I want. He’ll come round, especially if it means me moving back to England.’
‘Is that what you want? You want to move back to England? Where has this idea suddenly come from? You are only meant to be away for a few weeks.’
‘What’s keeping us in New York, Mum? What life do we have there?’
‘It’s where I live, it’s where we live now.’
‘I know all this must seem a little too much, out of the blue,’ I said softly, ‘but it’s not like either of us have jobs that are tying us there and we both rent apartments. You are wasted cleaning diners when you could be back here, teaching dance and living at Honeysuckle Farm. It feels like home here, Mum. It’s our home.’
‘And you think your grandfather is just going to let me waltz back into my old life, teaching dance and living at the farm? That’s never going to happen, Alice.’ She sounded a little hysterical now.
‘To be honest, Mum, one of you needs to make the first move. If the truth be told, we don’t know how long he has left, and could you actually live with yourself, knowing you had the chance to put it all right, but didn’t take it?’
‘That is a low blow, Alice, and you know it.’
Now it was my turn to remain silent. I recognised that tone of her voice, the tone when I knew I’d over-stepped the mark.
‘He made it crystal clear to me that I was never to come back – never to darken his door again – and since he has never told me otherwise …’
‘All that was said in the heat of the moment, all those years ago! Isn’t it time everyone let bygones be bygones?’ I tried to be the voice of reason, keeping my voice calm.
‘You’ve no idea what went on, Alice,’ she carried on without taking a breath.
‘Well, why don’t you tell me then?’ The frustration was now clear in my tone.
‘This conversation ends here, Alice,’ she said, firmly taking control.
Silence again.
I could feel tears pricking the back of my eyes.
‘Mum, this is ridiculous. He’s an old man and surely some sort of fallout from years ago can be put behind you?’ I said, wistfully.
‘I’ll ring you again next week to see how you are.’
‘Mum, please.’
Without saying anything more, she hung up.
Even though it was a relief to get the conversation over, I never even had a chance to tell her I’d discovered what had happened to Grandma. And as soon as I put the phone down there was a soft rap on the bedroom door.
Grace stepped into the room and gave me a hug. I’d been holding onto my tears but the second Grace’s arms wrapped around me they were unleashed.
‘Sorry, I was kind of eavesdropping outside … difficult conversation?’
I managed a nod as we both sat down on the bed, crossed-legged, facing each other.
‘What was the outcome?’ she asked tentatively.
‘Not the one I was hoping for.’
‘Did you discover what the falling out was over?’
I shook my head. ‘I’m still clueless.’
‘Do you think it’s anything to do with money? People always fall out over money.’
‘I’ve honestly no idea.’
‘How did she take Ted’s offer?’
‘I kind of put a new spin on it, told her he’d offered me the farm, the annexe and he wanted me to re-open the dancing school, but that I wanted her to move back to England with me so that we could open it together as a business, a partnership.’
‘Good plan, and her response?’
‘She hung up on me! This whole thing is just causing everyone more upset.’
‘Stalemate. Someone has to make the first move.’
‘That’s my point. I need some fresh air. Have you got time for a quick walk to the dance school? I’ve not even seen it yet.’
‘Absolutely. I’ve not been inside that building since the day you left.’
‘Come on,’ I said, grabbing my phone, ‘there’s no time like the present.’
‘You know what I think, Alice Parker? I think your mum will mull over that conversation and come to her senses.’
‘I hope you’re right, because I’ve made a decision,’ I announced, feeling my spirits perk up.
‘Go on …’
‘I can’t face going back to my dreary life and Grandie’s offer is too good to pass up. I’d be mad not to give it a go.’
‘You are definitely staying?’ Grace’s eyes widened.
‘I am. There … I’ve said it out loud.’
Grace threw her arms around me. ‘For what it’s worth, I think it’s a great decision.’
‘Me too. I feel like it’s my time now, I want to do something for me. Does that make me sound selfish?’
‘Of course it doesn’t.’
My decision was made.
Even though Mum was still firmly on my mind, I just had to accept Grandie’s offer. He had welcomed me back with open arms, and it wasn’t my job to sort out their relationship. That was down to them, especially if both of them were being stubborn and keeping me in the dark. What more could I do? I felt a great weight lifting off my shoulders.
‘Right,’ I said bracingly, ‘come on, let’s go and have a look around the dance school.’ I could hear the excitement in my own voice as I let out a breath.
Brook Bridge village was home again and as we grabbed our bags I felt a real sense of belonging once more.