Chapter
Thirty-Five
I’m trembling. My entire body is shaking so hard, my teeth are chattering. “You drive like an absolute maniac.”
“I know.” He laughs even harder. Now he actually sounds like a maniac. “I didn’t know I had it in me.”
I want to hit him. Just beat the shit out of him for scaring me so damn bad. “You’re crazy.”
“You know it.” He’s grinning like a lunatic and that’s it. I give in to my urges and punch his arm. Hard. So hard, my knuckles hurt because he is solid muscle. I hit him again, then one more time for good measure. “You scared the shit out of me!”
“Ow.” He rubs his arm, glaring at me. “I told you it was going to be scary.”
“You could’ve killed us!”
“But I didn’t.” Oh, he has some nerve to sound smug.
“You are such an asshole.” I just let loose and start pummeling him, hitting him where I can, smacking and punching his arms, his chest, his shoulders. Cass finally grabs hold of my wrists, wrapping his fingers around them so tight I can’t hit him anymore.
“Chill out. We’re okay,” he murmurs, his gaze locked with mine. We’re both breathing heavily, our frantic inhales and exhales loud in the otherwise quiet of the car’s interior. The windows are still down, and I can hear the chirp of the bugs outside, the howling wind, the occasional dog barking.
“Duck,” Cass whispers, jerking me down so we’re both practically flat across our seats, facing each other over the center console. It’s so freaking uncomfortable, and I’m about to tell him he’s overreacting when car lights sweep over us, illuminating the SUV’s interior for the briefest moment.
I’m still trembling. Even harder this time, but I realize fast the car was coming down the hill and has already driven by. Cass sits back up, running a hand through his unruly hair, messing it up even worse. “The car’s gone. It wasn’t them.” He glances down to where I’m still curled up, half hanging over the seat, my lower body curled onto the floorboard. “Pen. You okay?”
I look up, my gaze meeting his. He must see something in my eyes because the next thing I know he’s pulling me up, up, into his arms. He’s somehow pushed back his seat to give us more room and he’s cradling me in his lap, rubbing his hands over my arms. Holding me close, murmuring nonsensical words into my hair as I continue to shiver.
“Hey.” He nudges me and I pull away from him so our gazes meet. It’s dark, but my eyes have adjusted, so I can just make out his features. The air between us is crackling. Electric. I can feel him. His body is vibrating with this sort of restless energy and it’s pulsating from within him and straight into me. “You’re coming down from the adrenaline rush,” he says as he reaches out and tentatively touches my hair.
I say nothing. What can I say? I’ve never felt anything like this before. It’s almost…sexual, I swear.
“Pen,” he whispers, and I feel his breath. Feel it waft across my face, warm and soft and reminding me that he is very much a boy and I am very much a girl and we are sitting together intimately. I’m on his lap and his arms are around me and I have my hands on his chest and somehow, they move of their own accord. Until they wrap around his neck and my fingers are in his hair and his mouth is just a hair’s breadth away from mine.
And then his lips are on mine and I feel sparks spread all over my skin. My lips are hot. Tingling.
“Did you feel that?” he asks, just before he kisses me again, deeper this time. “Pen. Did you?”
His hands grip me tighter and his legs shift beneath me. Yes, I feel him. I feel him all over me. “Feel what?” I whisper.
“This.” He kisses me again, his tongue sweeping inside my mouth, circling around mine, and I moan. It’s like I’ve lost all control with this boy, and I never do that.
Except with Cass.
“Tell me,” he urges, and I whisper yes against his lips, because I do feel it. I feel the energy between us surge under my skin, and it sings in my blood. I wiggle against him and he groans low and deep, his chest vibrating with the sound.
It is the sexiest sound I’ve ever heard. Hands down.
“That was a wild ride,” he whispers against my mouth, and I nip at his lower lip with my teeth, making him smile. “Did you like it? Tell me you liked it.”
“No, I didn’t.” I try to bite his lip again but he gently pushes me away.
“Don’t lie, Pen. You fucking loved it.” His mouth lands on my neck and he’s whispering close to my ear. “You felt the rush. You wanted more of it. I saw it written all over your face.”
“It was too dangerous. You could’ve killed us.” So dangerous, yet somehow also sexy.
“But I didn’t. You’re fine. I’m fine. It’s okay to like dangerous things.” His mouth lingers on mine, the kiss gentle until he sinks his teeth into my lower lip and tugs.
“What are we doing?” I ask him, running my hands across his shoulders.
“We’re just coming down from all the adrenaline.” More kissing. It’s hot and deep and wet and our hands wander. I readjust my position, straddling his hips, and he groans.
“We should leave. I don’t want to get caught.”
He kisses my neck, his damp lips blazing a trail of fire across my skin. “Don’t worry. No one will find us.”
“I don’t want to get in trouble.” I tilt my head back, loving the sensation of his mouth on my neck, his hands on my waist. Being with him is addictive. Like eating a sinful dessert when I should be on a diet.
“Not everything’s black and white, you know,” Cass mutters against my throat. “You’re allowed to be bad every once in a while.”
I frown and try to pull away from him, but he won’t let me go. Was he trying to prove a point with that crazy stunt? Trying to bring a little danger into my life because…what? I’m too boring? Haven’t I been through enough? I lost my best friend, my two other friends, and my life has been turned completely upside down. Now he’s trying to scare the hell out of me and possibly even kill me?
“What do you mean about the black and white thing?” I look at him, our gazes meeting.
“You’re too rigid,” he whispers, gently touching my face. “You need to relax and trust me.”
I try to shove him away. He thinks I’m boring. He believes I see things one way or another and there’s no in-between. Maybe old Penelope thought that way, but I don’t think like that anymore. Not with Cass.
Not with anyone.
“Don’t,” he murmurs, grabbing hold of my arms again and keeping me still. “Why are you fighting me?”
“Why are you being so mean?” My voice cracks and I hate it. I need to be stronger. Yet he makes me feel weak.
“I’m not,” he whispers. “I’d never be mean to you, Pen. I like you too damn much.”
His words are just what I wanted to hear. I still want him.
Desperately.
And then we’re kissing again. Wildly. No finesse, no precise skill or teasing tongues and lips. It’s raw and it’s carnal and his hands are everywhere and my hands are everywhere and then I hear the quick chirp, chirp of a police siren. I open my eyes to see the flash of blue and red lights illuminate the SUV’s interior.
That’s when I realize there are two police cars parked on either side of the SUV, their lights going but not the sirens.
“Shit,” Cass mutters, and I lean into him, my face pressed against that warm, solid spot between his neck and shoulder. He is strong and comforting yet also terrifying, all at once.
He scares me. And I don’t know what to do about it.
There’s a knock on the window, and I jerk my head up to find Detective Spalding standing next to the driver’s-side door. He peers in closer, and Cass rolls down the window.
“That was some crazy ass driving, son,” Spalding drawls, slowly shaking his head.
My heart falls into my toes. “Wait a minute. You were following us?”
Spalding ignores my question. “Why were you two running?”
“We thought someone else was following us,” Cass admits.
Spalding frowns. “Like who?”
I’m about to open my mouth, but Cass shoots me a look. One that says, keep quiet. So I do.
Hughes suddenly appears, shoving Spalding out of his way. He looks ready to reach through the open window and grab Cass by the throat. “What the fuck was that little stunt?”
“Calm down—” Spalding starts, but Hughes cuts him off.
“That was some bullshit driving, Vincenti. You could’ve gotten yourself killed.” He points a finger at me. “And her!”
“I didn’t, okay?” Cass sounds just as irritated as Hughes. “I had no idea you guys were cops. Why didn’t you flip your lights on?”
“We were following you in our car,” Spalding tells us. It’s like Detective Hughes can’t even speak, he’s so angry. He stalks away from us, pacing in front of the Lexus and glaring in our direction every few seconds.
“You should’ve given me a signal,” Cass mutters.
“Like what, a bat signal?” Detective Spalding starts to laugh, shaking his head. “You’ve got some explaining to do, son. Afraid we’re going to have to ask you to come down to the station with us.”
“There’s nothing for me to explain,” Cass says, running a hand through his hair, trying to fix it.
I slide off his lap, straightening my skirt, my hair, utterly embarrassed. They just caught us making out after Cass drove like a crazy man to get away from them. I bet we look guilty.
It doesn’t help that I actually feel guilty.
That moment was so intense. I can’t believe I actually became—aroused by that car ride. And the way Cass talked to me, touched me, kissed me…he was aroused, too. It was crazy. If the detectives hadn’t interrupted us, I bet we would’ve taken that moment further.
Like get naked and have sex in the back seat of the Lexus further.
“Can’t we just talk here?” Cass asks. “It’s been a long day. The last place I want to go is the police station.”
“Then tell us exactly what you two were doing this afternoon.” He sends us both a stern look. “And no bullshit, either. We’ve been tailing you two since you left the school. We know where you’ve been—first Courtney Jenkins’s house, then Brogan Pearson’s. What are you up to?”
I look over at Cass, who then turns to Spalding, possibly ready to spill, but Spalding puts a halt to it.
“Step out of the car, Cass. You, too, Penelope. Come outside and let’s hear what you have to say.”
I can’t look at Cass. I can’t look at the detectives, either. My entire body is vibrating, and I inhale shakily, trying to calm my racing heart. The adrenaline is wearing off quickly, and now the only emotion I’m experiencing is…
Fear.
…
We told them everything we could, only leaving out our suspicions and theories. They don’t need to know what we’re thinking. Let them figure that stuff out on their own.
After an hour-long interrogation behind an abandoned house on a moonlit night, they finally let us go.
“I’m too tired to go to dinner,” I tell Cass as we start to drive. “Can you take me home?”
“Sure. You’re not hungry?”
I shake my head. I just want to take a shower and go to bed. Today has drained everything out of me.
“I’m glad you didn’t tell them what we talked about,” Cass says, his voice soft.
I glance over at him. “They don’t need to know.”
“Exactly. I’m sure they have a bunch of theories and suspicions and they’re not telling us dick,” he says irritably.
“As well they shouldn’t. They are the cops.”
Cass sends me a look. “Spalding mentioned the FBI is coming back to Cape Bonita to investigate further. They think there’s a serial killer on the loose.”
“Duh. Glad they finally realized it.” There’s too much cover-up in this town, all for the sake of image. They won’t reveal too many details about the crimes for fear it’ll taint the reputation of our bucolic seaside town. It’s complete crap. “I don’t understand why they won’t reveal any details to the media.”
“Because they’re looking for the killer. If you withhold information, the guilty party could slip. Give up details that no one else knows but the killer,” Cass explains, like he has lots of experience with this type of stuff.
“Is that what your mom did? About your dad?” I ask quietly.
He slowly shakes his head. “She fessed up right at the start, claiming she killed him. Then she turned around and said she didn’t do it when she had to plead in front of the judge. That’s why they went to trial. It was a mess.”
“Sounds like it.”
We’re quiet as we drive back into town. I’m still a little shaky, I realize as I hold my hands out in front of me. They’re quaking, and I link my fingers together, trying to calm myself down.
But it’s hard. I still feel shot full of adrenaline. I wonder if Cass feels it, too.
We don’t really talk again until he pulls up in front of my house fifteen minutes later. The windows shine with golden light, and I can imagine my mom still in the kitchen while my dad watches TV in his recliner. I wonder if they missed me. I know I’ve missed them.
What I miss the most is normalcy. The mundane things in life. There’s nothing mundane about what I’ve experienced these last few weeks. I wish I could get my friends back. I wish I could get my old life back.
“I hate this,” I tell Cass, turning to look at him.
He’s already watching me. “You hate what?”
“Everything that’s happened. Gretchen and Lex and Dani dying. Courtney’s turned into a mental case. We’re running for our lives from the freaking police like we’ve lost our minds. My life has turned into a made-for-TV movie!”
“I’m sorry, Pen,” he says, his voice soft. “I probably shouldn’t have driven like that.”
“You definitely shouldn’t have done that,” I agree. “You could’ve killed us.”
“You think I’m the killer, don’t you.” His voice is flat. It’s not a question, more like a statement. I must hesitate too long, because now he’s glaring at me. “You do.”
“I don’t know what to think anymore,” I admit, my voice quiet. Shaky. I can’t even believe he said that. It’s like he’s peering into my brain and can see all my worries and fears.
“You know me, Pen—” he starts but I shake my head, cutting him off.
“No, I really don’t know you at all. I wish I did.” I take a deep breath and let it all out before I speak again. “It’s like we were on the run from the police, Cass. Like you didn’t want to get caught. Is that what you were doing? Did you know the detectives were following us?”
“I didn’t realize it was the cops, Pen. Swear to God. They were chasing us in an unmarked car. I thought it was Courtney or Brogan or whoever the hell is doing this!” He punches the steering wheel, making me jump. “I don’t know how to fix this. I don’t know how to make it stop.”
“I don’t either,” I whisper. I grab my backpack and reach for the passenger door handle. “I think we might need…a break. Just for a little while. Until we both get our heads on straight.”
I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore. Or what I want.
He looks away from me and shrugs. “Whatever.”
What do I say to that? Tears threaten, and I close my eyes for a quick moment, fighting them off. “Good night, Cass.”
He says nothing. Doesn’t bother looking in my direction when I climb out of the SUV, slam the door, and start toward my front door.
“I wish you could trust me,” he calls out.
I turn to find him watching me, the driver’s-side window rolled down. “I wish I could trust you, too.”
He says nothing. Just stares at me with that intense gaze of his before the window slides closed, he starts the engine, and pulls away.