11

“Happy graduation, honey. Here’s a little something from your mom and me.” April’s father opened a manila envelope and spread a handful of colorful travel brochures across the restaurant tablecloth.

“You’re giving me brochures?” she teased. “How original, Daddy.” The graduation ceremony was over. April had been one of three students in her class who received top academic honors. She had sent her college applications late, so she didn’t know yet where she’d gotten in. But her academic honors, along with her high SAT scores, would improve her chances for entry into several elite schools.

“Not brochures,” her father declared, “but a gateway to the world.”

She studied the assortment. Greece, Hawaii, Italy, Japan, and China made an exotic fan on the tablecloth. He was offering her a trip to anywhere in the world she wanted to go. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Just pick your spot. I mean it, sweetheart. I’ll take a month off and away we’ll go,” her father urged.

“How about a cruise to the Greek isles?” April’s mother joined in.

“Or the Galápagos Islands,” her father suggested. “Wouldn’t you like to see the place that inspired Darwin to formulate his theory of evolution?”

“Hold it. We can’t all just take off for a month. What about your job, Dad? And Mom, what about the store? What would Caroline say?”

“She’s perfectly capable of running the store without me. And any place we go can be a potential treasure trove for the antique store. Why, a month hardly seems long enough. Why not longer?”

April shook her head. “Stop. Please. I appreciate the offer, but I don’t want to go away right now. If I go anywhere, it’ll be to the beach with my friends.”

“But, honey, this is such a wonderful opportunity,” said her mother. “You can do both.”

“No, I can’t.”

“But we’ve always had such a good time on trips,” her father interjected. “I thought it would be our last big vacation before you pack off to college.”

But it wasn’t college that April was thinking about. It was leaving Mark for a month. When they’d spoken on the phone the night before, he had sounded hoarse and wheezy. “Just a cold,” he’d said, but she knew that for him a cold could turn into pneumonia. How could she leave him when the slightest complication could land him in the hospital? How could she expect to have a good time when she didn’t know if he’d be well from day to day? The beach trip was local. She could return quickly if he had problems. If she was halfway around the world, it wouldn’t be so easy.

“Can’t we save the trip?”

“But why? You’ve always liked traveling with us before.” Her mother sounded hurt.

“And I still do. Just not right now. It’s my final summer before college. I’d like to hang around, get reacquainted with my friends. The last few months haven’t exactly been the most normal time of my life, you know.”

Her parents exchanged glances; then her father said, “We don’t want to pressure you into anything, April. We only thought an extended vacation would be a good way for you to put those months behind you.”

“And,” her mother added, “a way for us all to spend time together without the distractions of everyday life.”

April couldn’t help wondering how much her affection for Mark was entering into their decision. “I don’t want to go.” She shook her head stubbornly. “Not now. Maybe some other time.”

“But—” her mother started.

Hugh Lancaster put a restraining hand on his wife’s arm. “We can talk about it later. Tonight is supposed to be a celebration. Let’s just have fun.” He raised a glass of champagne in a toast. “To you, April. We’re very proud of you.”

“Yes, darling,” her mother said. “Very proud.”

April smiled at them, happy that the question of traveling with them could be set aside for the time being. Tomorrow night she’d be with Mark. Mark. The person who became more important to her with each passing day. The one person she wanted to be with more than any other.

Mark took her to the tiny Italian restaurant in his neighborhood that April had come to think of as their place. It wasn’t fancy, but the food was delicious and the booths were encircled by red curtains, so they could be together in privacy. “Are you sure you feel up to eating out?” April asked.

“I’m doing better,” Mark told her. “I’m on antibiotics and my respiratory therapist has been keeping a close watch on me. I’m going to be fine.” He grinned, but she wasn’t convinced.

“I’m not sure I believe you.”

“Do you want me to prove it?”

“Right here in the restaurant?”

“The curtains are closed. We’re alone.”

“How can you?”

He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a red balloon. “Want to watch me blow this up?”

She stared. “Are you kidding?”

“Do I look like I’m kidding?” He took the balloon and gave a few puffs. It swelled, but April could see the effort it was costing him. She wanted to tell him to stop. It was painful watching him huff and puff to fill the balloon with his precious breath. But she knew she couldn’t stop him. He was proving something to both of them, and she knew she must wait and watch and keep her mouth shut. At last, he tied the balloon and handed it over. “Told you I could do it.”

Gold lettering on the balloon spelled out HAPPY GRADUATION, APRIL. A lump rose in her throat. “You couldn’t have just bought me a card?”

He smiled, his face still flushed. “I made it in my uncle’s print shop. Are you impressed?”

“Totally.” She tied the balloon to the strap of her purse.

He reached for her hand. “After dinner, I have something else for you. It’s a surprise.”

April begged him to tell her what he was planning, but he wouldn’t. She ate quickly, and when the meal was over they walked to his apartment, several blocks away. The summer city night felt steamy, and lights shone brightly from store windows. April had never been to Mark’s apartment, and she was curious to see where he lived.

“My roommate’s out,” Mark said, unlocking the door. “I told him to make a night of it.”

April’s heart began to beat faster as he led her inside. The place was small and stuffy; an aging air conditioner struggled against the New York summer night. “Where’s your room?”

He gestured toward a closed door.

“Can I see it?”

“It’s a mess.”

“But you’re still going to let me see it.”

“Maybe later. We’ve got a date up on the roof right now.”

“We can go up there in a minute. I want to see your room first.” He didn’t budge. Slowly she said, “Come on, Mark. What’s the big deal about me seeing your room?”

“My room … I told you, it’s a mess.”

“So what? My room’s a mess too.”

“Because it may scare you off.”

“Is there a dead body in it?”

He laughed without humor. “Hardly.”

“Then show me.”

He led her to the door and opened it, and she stepped into his private world. At first glance, the room was ordinary. There were a bed, a dresser, a desk, and posters of beautiful racing cars on the walls. But she also saw that the top of his dresser was lined with medicine bottles. And there was a portable oxygen tank tucked into a corner near his bed. The odor of medicine hung in the air. “Welcome to my world,” he said. “Just like everybody else’s. Except for the CF.”

She walked around it slowly. The number of medicine bottles stunned her, but she tried not to show it. She stopped in front of his desk, where a computer sat beside a pile of books, most of them about medicine. “I didn’t know you were planning on going to medical school,” she said.

“I’m not. But I study everything I can about my condition. I surf the Net looking for information too. I have friends in cyberspace. You know what’s really nice about cyberspace?” April shook her head. “No one can see you. So everybody’s equal. People only know you by your signon name.”

“What’s yours?”

“Speedman.”

She chuckled. “Sounds like a superhero.”

He stepped closer to her. “I’m no superhero. If I were, I’d be free of CF. You might say it’s my personal form of kryptonite.” He took her hand. “All this medicine just keeps me going.”

“I’m glad you showed it to me.”

“I had to.”

“But why? You could have hidden the bottles.”

“My mother cornered me last time I went to dinner. She said that if I cared about you—really cared—I should give you the total picture. Not just the fun stuff.”

“We met in the hospital, remember? I already know you’ve got medical problems.”

“More than problems, April. A lifelong condition. Barring some medical miracle, I’ll never be well.”

“Have you forgotten that I have a medical problem of my own?”

“I don’t think of you as sick. It’s possible for you to get well. Not me.”

April swallowed hard. She knew it was true. “Why did you pick tonight to tell me all this? You must have a reason.”

Mark’s gaze never left her face. “Because I’m in love with you, April. And before we go any further, I need to know how you feel about me.”