Four
Chelsea
I’m nervous the entire fifteen-minute drive to Pres’ house. I’m not only having dinner with the girl that used to be my best friend, but also my boss. My boss that knows I upset his woman. The man who hasn’t said much to me in the past month. He hasn’t been mean, just different. He’s treated me as an afterthought when before he was kind and treated me like he cared how I was doing. It hurts, but I get it.
We pull down the unpaved driveway that leads to beautiful log cabin surrounded by woods. There are at least ten bikes parked near the garage and I can’t help the growing excitement that comes about being around this crew of bad ass men.
When Harrison parks, I wait for him to come around to help me out of his too high off the ground truck. Honestly, I just need the extra minute to get my bearings. He unbuckles my seatbelt as if I’m a child, and I secretly I love it.
“Ready Angel?” He asks softly. I nod my head, and he lifts me out of his truck until I’m at his side, my hand clasped reassuringly in his.
Emerson answers the door wearing a cut similar to Pres’, except hers says Property of Pres on it. I knew it was coming since he made it well known at Spanky’s that she’s his. I couldn’t be happier for them. She immediately wraps her arms around me, nearly knocking me over in her excitement.
“I’ve missed you so much!” She says, and it’s like the last several months have melted away. The distance I placed between us is no longer there and we’re Chelsea and Emersen again.
“I’ve missed you too!” I tell her, ready to start crying any second now.
She lets me go but grabs my hand pulling me inside. It’s almost like a chain because Harrison hasn’t let go of me once. Emersen leads us into the kitchen where Pres is taking the turkey out of the oven. She walks up to him and hugs him holding on extra tight. They’re so adorable together. I was wrong when I said she wasn’t tough enough for this life. She proved me and several others wrong. She is perfect for Pres and this life.
“Congratulations Pres,” Harrison says from beside me.
“I see we’ve all got a lot to be thankful for today,” Pres says staring at Harrison and me. Then I see it, the big sparkly rock on Emersen’s left hand.
“What? You’re engaged? When did this happen?” I squeal running up to her and giving her the biggest hug I can muster.
She giggles and hugs me back. “Last night. He asked me last night after…” She clears her throat. “Well, that doesn’t matter. Anyway, Ryker put my cut on me and told me that I would always be his old lady, but that it was time for me to make him an honest man. He told me I had a month to plan the wedding. The brute didn’t even ask.” She sounds outraged but is laughing, and I know she has found her person, the one that will have her back for the rest of her tomorrows.
I look at Harrison who is shaking Pres’ hand. Could we be happy like this? I look from Harrison to Pres, then back to Harrison, who’s in a dead stare at me. The way that’s he’s looking at me along with everything that has happened between us in the last twenty-four hours has me questioning everything I thought I wanted and scared to reach for it.
“Hey, Chelsea, why don’t I show you around the house. Rock has been here before.”
It takes him a minute to drag his eyes from mine, but eventually, he looks from me to Emersen.
“Rock, let’s talk outside. We have some Steel Daggers business to discuss. All the guys are out there.”
After they walk out, Emersen turns to me. “Wow. How long have you two been a thing?” She asks while getting us each a Dr. Pepper.
“We’re not. Or we weren’t this morning. I don’t know Em, today has been a weird day. Thanks,” I say and grab the offered drink.
I follow her into their living room, and we sit on the loveseat facing each other.
“I thought I was getting a tour.”
“That was code for girl talk. Ryker picked up what I was throwing down and became scarce like a good man. Chelsea, I hope you don’t mind, but Ryker told me about how they found you.”
I wince, not wanting to remember that night. “Yep.”
She grabs my hand and squeezes tight. “Chelsea, I have no idea what you’ve been through. After what happened last week, I don’t want to let stupid stuff get in between us. You are my best friend and I need to know you’re okay.”
“Me? Are you okay? I didn’t know what to do that night. The clubhouse was crazy with all the guys trying to locate you. I refused to leave until I knew you were safe. I stayed right there until we got the call that Pres had you.”
“I’m doing much better today, especially after last night. It’s time you let it all out Chels and then begin to let go of it.”
I nod, I need to release this poison before it eats me alive. “Do you remember that guy I told you about, the one I started seeing right before graduation who was ten years older than me?”
“Eric?”
“Yeah. God, I don’t even know where to start with this.” I shudder thinking about the things I let that man do to me. “My breaking point wasn’t when he filmed us having sex.” I can picture it now. I was gagged and on my knees begging him to take me, while the camera was pointed at my ass. “He called me a slut and a whore. Eric told me that I wasn’t someone who was worthy of love. It was bad, but I stayed.”
Emersen grabs my hands on holds on, supporting me when I need her most.
“What killed me was when he invited his buddies over to our apartment and showed them the video after they had been drinking for a few hours. He told me it was my duty to please him. That if I loved him like I said I did I would do what he wanted. I wanted to make him happy. I wanted to be worthy of his love. He wanted me to give his friends a blowjob, but I refused. He slapped me in front of his friends, hard enough that I fell and hit my head on the coffee table. His friends laughed it up while I laid there crying.”
I hear her gasp. Staring at our hands and holding on tight, needing her strength to get through this, I continue.
“He yelled at me and sent me to the room, told me that I sickened him, that he couldn’t look at me. Later that night he walked into the room horribly drunk and beat me for the first time. The next day he woke me up with flowers apologizing for his behavior. He begged me not to go. Told me he’d never been that drunk before, and it wasn’t him that hurt me. I fell for his bullshit, mostly because I was embarrassed I let this become my life. I felt like it was my fault. I stayed.
After that, I started rethinking all my choices. Why did I throw my independence away that I had worked so hard for? How could I have been that stupid? I never applied for a job, because Eric promised he’d take care of me. That he’d pay all the bills, all he asked was I do was my fair share by cleaning up the house. I didn’t realize he was beginning to isolate me. I didn’t have a cell phone, and he refused to get me one saying I could just use his. I didn’t have a car because he was at work and when he was home, he didn’t feel comfortable with me driving it around. There were so many little things just like this Em and I couldn’t bare to tell you.”
“Jesus Chelsea. I would have come for you. We could have left and gone somewhere new. I love you babe!.”
“I know. I love you too. It’s not as easy as it sounds while you’re living it though. I look back now and can see how it all spiraled. With as much as I talked to myself, going back and forth about what I should do, I would have sworn I was going crazy. I wasn’t in a good place.”
“That’s an understatement.” She snips, and her words hurt. “Shit, sorry Chels. I’m just pissed that he did this to you.”
“You mean that I let him do this to me. I should have been stronger. I should have left before he had a chance to lay a hand on me.”
“That’s not what I meant Chelsea. Get to the rest of it, hun. Say it so you can start living without it hanging over you.” She encourages.
I take in a deep breath and breathe it out slow. “A month after the first incident, he had his friends over again. I was nervous, but I felt like I knew what could happen, so I was prepared this time. When they started drinking, they all started flirting and touching me. I kept looking at Eric to see him smiling and encouraging it. I decide to go along with it even though it grossed me out. It felt wrong, like I was cheating. Why would he want other men touching me when he was supposed to love me? I was a virgin before Eric and I became very uncomfortable with all of them flirting and touching me. When one of the guys put my hand on his dick, I pulled away, feeling ashamed that I had encouraged their behavior this time. That wasn’t who I was.
I told them all that I was tired. I left and went to the bedroom, but I didn’t undress. I locked the door and prayed Eric didn’t come back here and force me to do something with them. I eventually fell asleep. When I woke, Eric was straddling my middle and hitting me in the face. I tried to get him off me, but he was stronger and kept hitting me, repeatedly.
When he started choking me, I knew I wouldn’t survive something like this. I felt around for anything I could hit him with. I grabbed the glass vase on the side table. I swung and hit him on the third try. He slumped over, and I was finally able to push him off me and sit up. When I did, I saw blood all over the bed.”
“Did you kill him?” Pres asks and startles me out of the flashback. Pres and Harrison are standing behind the couch. The rest of the guys are standing around the living room, and some are in the kitchen, all staring at me. Why the hell didn’t Emersen warn me? How could she let me keep talking through this? I see Camden in the kitchen staring at me with a look of disgust all over his face. Fuck, how much did they hear?