Dawson
“Mickie, wait.”
Once again, my dick was about to be punished by my incredible stupidity.
Mickie was not supposed to find out about the promotion from anyone other than me. And what was worse, now she thought I’d taken the job without ever talking to her about it. I had no idea what had possessed the Commissioner to act like I’d already accepted the position. Maybe he thought it was a foregone conclusion, and that I’d be insane not to take it.
It didn’t really matter why I’d just taken a huge step backwards in repairing things with my wife.
I just had to fix it.
Before things got worse.
I followed Mickie as she weaved through the throng of people in the ballroom. She pushed through a side door, which led out into a deserted hallway. At my continued calls, she didn’t stop or look back.
“Just leave me alone for a minute,” she grated out, still not pausing.
Not a chance.
I picked up my pace. “I haven’t taken the job yet,” I said. “They’ve basically offered it to me, but I haven’t said yes.”
She pivoted. Between the fire in her eyes and the wild curls in her hair, she looked like an enraged goddess. The kind you didn’t mess with.
“But you’ve known about it,” she pointed out. “Clearly, you’ve known for who knows how long and you haven’t brought it up with me. Just exactly how much have you been keeping from me, Dawson?”
Enough.
She was going to hear what I had to say and, by God, she was going to listen.
I snatched her wrist and hauled her through the nearest closed door, which turned out to be a storage room for the ballrooms. Extra tables were propped up against the walls, and stacks of chairs covered the space. I backed her up against one of those stacks, until she had no more places to run.
No escape.
“I only found out about it a few weeks ago,” I said evenly. “And since things were still a little…tense between us at the time, I didn’t think it was the best time to bring something like that up.”
She crossed her arms over her chest, her frown deepening. “You mean something that would have a dramatic impact on our daily lives?” she asked haughtily. “That’s your job, Dawson. I kind of need to know when things change with it.”
I leaned in closer, boxing her in with my arms. “Discussing this change at the time would have most certainly caused a fight,” I said through clenched teeth. “And we were already fighting enough then. So, excuse me for wanting to smooth things out a little between us before I dug myself a deeper hole.”
A microscopic bit of fight left her features, but there was still too much there to comfort me in any way.
“Then why did the Commissioner act like you’d already accepted?”
I shook my head. “I have no idea. I guess because Lieutenant Allen wants me to take it, and has probably been talking about it with his bosses. Everyone’s been encouraging me to go for it. I think most people just assume I’m going to.”
Her eyes searched mine, flitting back and forth. “And what do you want?”
So many things.
But only one of them was a make-or-break situation.
“I want you, Mickie.” She had to believe that. If not, I’d failed her in every possible way. “A promotion won’t meant shit to me if I don’t have you. I need you to understand that.”
If eyes could frown, that’s what hers were doing. It was the only way I could describe how she was looking at me.
“I do understand,” she said. “But this is part of our problem. Communication. You not talking to me about stuff.”
I grunted in frustration. Were we back to that again? “Mickie, I talk to you about everything,” I insisted. “You know I’m not like how I used to be.”
“Not everything,” she said, stepping closer to me. “You might talk to me about a lot of things, and even open up about your feelings. But if you think it might cause me any stress whatsoever, like it’s too heavy, you keep it to yourself.”
“What do you mean?”
She waved her hand around at nothing. “Stuff with your cases, issues with your family. And did you really not think I would find out about the medication you went on for your high cholesterol?”
Shit. She knew about that?
“Ever since I went on bedrest when I was pregnant with the twins,” she continued, “you think you have to protect me from every piece of information I might find even the slightest bit worrisome.”
“And what is wrong with that?” I demanded.
Was she expecting me to apologize for trying to protect her? To take care of her?
“I have never been more scared in my life than when I saw you lying in that hospital bed with our children inside you, hooked up to all those damn machines. Not knowing if everything was okay. Or if I had done something to cause all of it. You’re damn right I’m going to do everything I can to make sure that never happens again.”
Her expression softened. “You couldn’t have prevented that,” she said gently. “And you can’t control what’s going to happen now. I know you don’t want to upset me by talking about your mother or how stressed you are about your investigations. And I appreciate your concern.” She laid her hand on my chest. “But I’m a grown woman, Dawson. I can handle all of it. It’s my job as your wife to share your burdens with you. You need to share it as much as I need to hear it.”
What she said made sense. But I couldn’t get the image of her in that hospital bed out of my head. High blood pressure due to stressful environments.
“But I do know how you worry for me, Mick,” I said, pressing my forehead against hers. “How can you expect me to tell you every single thing without being afraid of what it’s doing to you? I would rather suffer emotional torture every day for the rest of my life than cause you pain of any kind.”
She squeezed my arms, her tiny fingers unable to cover even half of my biceps. “But when you keep all of that to yourself, when you shut me out, that hurts me. Do you get that? It hurts to know that I’m not the one you turn to when something is bothering you, or when you just need to talk. You’re causing me more pain by not letting me in than you would if you opened up.”
It felt like something wrapped around my throat, preventing me from speaking. Or even breathing.
Was that true? Had I been causing her pain all these years and never realized it? Had she told me this before and I’d just never listened?
“I don’t want you to think I can’t talk to you,” I whispered, my voice sounding broken even to my own ears. “You’re the only one who would ever understand. But making myself feel better by getting things off my chest would never be worth it if the cost was your peace of mind.”
Her hands moved up to frame my face. “I can only have peace of mind when I know I’m able to help you,” she said. “When you know I’m here and you’ll come to me when you need me. Maybe it’s really selfish of me, but I just want you to need me, Dawson.”
Just when I’d thought she couldn’t have said anything crazier.
I buried my hands in her hair. “I always need you, Mickie.” I placed my hand over the tattoo on my chest. “Remember? I need you every fucking minute of the day. I need you right now.”
I smashed our lips together, drawing an immediate moan from her. I yanked her tight to me and lifted her onto a stack of chairs, pressing up against her as close as our bodies could get. If she didn’t think I needed her, I would show her how fucking wrong she was.
My hands were frantic as they found the slit in her dress and shoved the material aside, pushing it past her hips. Her black silk panties were revealed to me. When I rubbed the center of them, I groaned at how wet they’d gotten from my earlier finger fucking.
“I love knowing your panties are drenched because of me,” I said. “Love knowing I did that to you. You want more?”
Her eyes were closed when she said, “What do you think?”
I chuckled and lifted her chin up to me. Her eyes automatically opened at my touch. “Then you’ll keep your eyes open the whole time and watch. Don’t look away from my head between your legs. While I lick you, tongue you…I want your eyes on me.”
I watched her swallow before I bent forward and kissed her throat. Then I eased my way down her body, kissing the swell of her breasts and moving lower until I reached the apex of her thighs where my prize awaited my hungry mouth. She lifted her ass as I dragged her panties down her legs until they were a heap on the floor.
And there it was. Her pussy, all glistening and ready for me. Her lips were slick and swollen and so sweet, my mouth watered at the sight. Her heat was the only thing that could satisfy me right then. For now I’d use my tongue. Later, my dick would take the plunge.
I raised my gaze to hers. Her eyes were glued to my mouth, and her body trembled with the urge to be pleasured.
“Watch me,” I commanded.
She tipped her chin. “Eat me.”
She didn’t have to tell me twice.
I dove in.
Lapping up her dripping cream with my tongue, I gorged on her willingly offered flesh. Feasting on her soft lips, consuming her sweet juices, relishing her whimpered pleas for more. I knew how she’d always liked it. She loved the contrasts of slow then fast, of rough then gentle, of nips of my teeth then healing swipes of my tongue. I’d figured all of that out years ago.
At least some things never changed.
And when those whimpers turned to stifled moans, I knew she was close. Especially when she started to drive her hips into my face, working herself against my mouth.
I glanced up at her, needing to see her face as she came. But she had disobeyed my one rule.
“Open your eyes,” I demanded.
Her eyelids snapped open, following the sound of my voice.
“Scream my name until you’re hoarse. Fuck yourself on my tongue. Do whatever you want, but keep your eyes on me.”
Our gazes remained locked as I put my mouth back on her, guiding her to her climax. Even as she shook against me, her fingers clutching the short strands of my hair, she stayed focused on me.
“Dawson… Oh, my God…”
I groaned my encouragement against her skin, telling her without words to ride it out until she couldn’t take it anymore. And she gave me everything she had, greedily draining herself down my throat. But I liked being a tool for her orgasm. Better me and my mouth than her own fingers.
Unless I was there watching, of course.
I kissed her inner thighs before I stood back up, proud at how destroyed she looked. Some of her hair had fallen out of the pins holding it together. Stray hairs were clinging to her neck where perspiration had gathered. And her plump lower lip was red from where she’d been digging her teeth into it.
I would have grinned had she not pulled me in by my tie and connected our mouths once again. I knew she was getting off on tasting herself on my lips. Her fingers flew down to my pants, fumbling with the button and zipper for a moment before they reached the waistband of my briefs.
She broke the kiss to watch my reaction as she pulled my dick out and stroked. No words were spoken as she squeezed my length, spreading moisture along my shaft, getting it ready to enter her.
There were no reminders of the no-sex deal we’d made. What was happening here was organic, and we were simply letting our bodies do all the talking.
Just as I was about to remove her hand myself and push into her, she scooted to the edge of the chair and began to spread her legs wider—
The door to the room opened.
I quickly covered her body with mine, so whoever it was wouldn’t see the half-naked state she was in. Luckily, the room was pretty dark, and we were in a corner off to the side.
The person didn’t even turn on a light. He simply grabbed the first stack of chairs he saw and dragged them out as he distractedly chatted with someone in the hallway. The door closed behind him with a resounding click.
When I finally looked down at her after several tense beats of silence, I was disappointed—yet not surprised—to see that most of the lust-filled cloudiness in her eyes had disappeared.
Motherfucker.
How in the hell could one person’s luck be so bad?
I had lost count of how many times I’d been shut down with her.
But her hand was still wrapped around my dick. Something I think we both noticed at the same time.
The corner of her mouth tilted up as her hand resumed its stroking. It was like she was communicating a silent message. That if the moment was once again ruined for sex, then she would at least pay back the favor and not leave me absolutely miserable for the rest of the night.
I’d take it.
Her hand was better than my own. Obviously.
“Eyes on me,” her sultry voice whispered, throwing my own words back at me.
It didn’t take me long to shoot all over her hand. Again, not surprising. I was lucky I hadn’t spurted in my pants at the table earlier when her pussy had all but cut the circulation off in my fingers.
I may have loved the sight of my seed coating her fingers, but it was still a poor substitute for releasing deep inside her.
With a smile stretching her mouth wide, she took the handkerchief out of my jacket pocket and used it to wipe her hand off. She held it up to me. “I think I’ll keep this.”
I half-grinned, and bent down to retrieve her panties from the floor. “Good. Because I’m keeping these.”
Christ. I was close to coming again at the thought of her walking around for the rest of the night without underwear on. Knowing nothing had touched her pussy since my mouth had been on it.
She licked her lips as if she was thinking the same thing. “And here I thought you’d forgotten how to show your wife a good time.”
I slipped her panties into my pocket. “Like I said, the night is still young.”