Chapter 27

Quinn

 

There was only a small window in Raider’s room, but it let in enough light, even through the blinds and curtains, it made it seem like a huge one. I groaned as the now bright room tried to pull me from a deep sleep. I was comfortable, dammit. All I wanted was to sleep a few more hours, but that window was the perfect alarm clock for anyone who couldn’t sleep with the lights on.

The hard body behind me shifted when I tried to get out of bed, huge hands locking around my lower abdominal and refusing to let go. “Don’t go,” Raider murmured against my ear before kissing it. “We have the entire day off. Let’s sleep a little longer.”

I knew I wouldn’t be able to fall back to sleep, especially now that my stomach was starting to toss and turn from the stupid morning sickness that wanted to take over my damn life. However, the feel of the heat coming from him as he molded me back against his hard body was too tempting to resist. Without giving it much thought, I snugged into him, savoring this moment with him.

It had been four days since we had gone on lockdown. Four days of sleeping in Raider’s bed with him every night. Four nights of him holding me like I was the most precious thing in the world to him. He had even kept his promise and hadn’t attempted to touch me in any sexual way, even though I knew it cost him. Even now, his rock-hard cock was pressing into my ass, straining for attention, but he didn’t do anything more than kiss my ear again before releasing a long, contented sigh.

Lower, he unchained his hands and started caressing over the same place he had been holding me all night. Right over our baby. It was when he did little things like that, that my heart threatened to melt for him, and I was in danger of loving him all over again.

“What’s going through that beautiful head of yours right now, sweetheart?”

I couldn’t possibly tell him that. It was hard enough to remain neutral where he was concerned without spilling everything I was thinking about him. “I’m trying not to vomit all over your bed,” I told him instead. Not a lie. This morning sickness bullshit was anything but fun. Thankfully, it only lasted a few hours in the morning.

“Ah, hell, babe. I’m sorry.” He released me and sat up in bed. Leaning over the bed, he opened his nightstand drawer and pulled something out before turning back to me.

I stayed where I was, hoping that I didn’t throw up. I wasn’t sure how many changes of sheets the clubhouse had, but I was pretty sure there weren’t any extra to spare at the moment. People were sleeping on cots and the floor all over the clubhouse. They were sharing pillows and blankets because there wasn’t enough to go around.

Raider sat something beside me, then offered me what was in his hand. A cracker?

“I’m seriously not hungry right now.”

He had been trying to feed me every chance he got over the last few days. If one of the old ladies was cooking, he made me a plate. If Aggie offered to make sandwiches, he stole two of them for me. I felt like I stayed full because of him.

I refused to admit that I liked how he was taking care of me. Everyone was noticing it. I figured his MC brothers would have given him hell for it, but if they were, they did it when I wasn’t around.

“Raven suggested you try eating a few crackers before you get out of bed in the mornings. She told me it helped her out a lot when she had bad morning sickness.” When I still didn’t take the cracker from him, he lifted it to my lips. “What’s the harm in trying?”

Sighing, I opened my mouth just enough to nibble on one of the corners. Salty things were my least favorite food, but I had to admit that, right then, the taste wasn’t that bad. I slowly chewed, ready to make a run for the bathroom at any second.

A few moments passed with nothing happening, so I took another small bite. Raider held the cracker the entire time, feeding me like it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do. When the cracker was gone, and I was starting to feel a little more human, he pulled out another from the package and fed that one to me, as well.

Five crackers later, I thought I might actually survive the morning without throwing up.

“Better?” The concern shining out of his eyes right then pulled at every heartstring I had.

“Better,” I found myself whispering. “Thanks.”

Raider rubbed his thumb over my lips. “You have a crumb … right here.” Bending his head, he kissed the corner of my mouth.

Every cell in body came alive. The thought of morning sickness was a million miles away now.

He started to lift his head , but I couldn’t bear to have him break such a sweet kiss. I brought my hands to the back of his neck, holding him in place as I opened my mouth, silently asking for more.

Our first kiss had been marred by the sudden attack that had followed, but this, I wanted to savor this second kiss. It was just his lips, brushing so carefully over mine, that had tears burning my eyes. He didn’t try to deepen it, didn’t attack my lips, and fuck my mouth with his tongue. No, this kiss was tender, as if he were trying to tell me something with each butterfly-soft caress.

He pulled back, but didn’t leave me, pressing his forehead against mine. I stroked my fingers over his hair.

“I love you.”

It wasn’t the first time he had said that. It wasn’t even the tenth. He had said it every chance he got. He had said it loud enough for the entire clubhouse to hear it. He had whispered it in my ear as he drifted off to sleep beside me.

I wanted to believe him, but I couldn’t help holding myself back.

A knock on the bedroom door pulled us apart, and Raider got out of bed to see who it was. As he crossed the room, he grabbed a shirt, covering his delicious chest. His only other clothing was his boxer briefs. I let my eyes linger on his amazing ass as he pulled the door open.

Tanner stood on the other side, a frown on his normally smiling face. “I stole Matt’s keys. Raven asked me to go by the house to pick up a few things for the kids. Figured I would ask if you wanted to go with me to get your girl some more clothes.”

Raider glance at me from over his shoulder. “Babe, you need anything? I’ll go get it if you do.”

I slowly sat up in bed, still not completely trusting the crackers to stay down. When they did, I nodded. “I need a few things. Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“I’m here to serve you, sweetheart.” He winked, and my pussy clenched at the wicked look in his eyes. He turned back to Tanner. “Give me five.”

“Sure. I’ll be outside.” Tanner leaned around Raider, wiggling his brows at me. “See you, Quinn.”

Raider pushed him out the door, then slammed it in his face. Locking it, he returned to the bed and started pulling on his jeans. “Can you text me a list of what you need? I’m not that good at picking out what a girl needs. If you don’t tell me exactly what you want, I will probably end up just bringing you underwear.”

His honesty was starting to become endearing. I loved that about …

I stopped the thought before I could even finish it. No. No, I didn’t love it. I didn’t love him.

With my heart now beating me to death, I forced a smile for him. “Yeah, sure. Thanks again.”

He leaned over the bed and pressed a quick, but still soft kiss to my lips. “I love you, Quinn.”

He left before I could open my mouth again. My mind wasn’t on where he was going. It was scattered all over the place at what my head and heart had been trying so hard to deny.

For several long minutes, I just sat there in bed, trying to tell myself all the reasons it was a stupid idea to still love Raider Hannigan. Nevertheless, my heart didn’t care, and my head wasn’t letting me make the same arguments it had taken so long to drill into it.

I started to get out of bed, and as my feet touched the floor and I began to stand, a loud boom sounded and the building shook. For a split-second, I thought it was an earthquake, but it didn’t last long enough to even qualify as an aftershock.

My heart dipped, and I got this sick feeling in my stomach that didn’t have anything to do with morning sickness. I didn’t know why, but I started running.

Raider hadn’t left yet. I could catch him, kiss him again before he went to my house. I just needed to see him again.

The front room of the clubhouse was in chaos as everyone tried to get outside. All around me, I heard people screaming, crying, yelling.

“Matt’s truck!” one of the sheep was screaming from her spot at one of the windows that looked out into the parking lot. “Oh, my God! Oh, my God!”

No. No, it couldn’t be. Raider was supposed to be in that truck. He was …

No.

I pushed through the masses, shoving anyone who didn’t get out of my way fast enough with a strength that I didn’t normally possess. The closer I got to the door, the more I could smell the smoke and other fumes coming from the explosion everyone was continuing to yell about. My heart was in my throat, which was probably a good thing, because it was holding back the bile that kept threatening to escape.

Outside, the crowd was no less chaotic. Black smoke filled the air, making it hard to breathe or see. Sirens in the distance told me that the fire department were on their way. Everyone was surrounding the fiery mess that had once been Matt’s huge-ass truck. The MC brothers were trying to get close to it, to help whoever was still inside. I could make out the outline of at least two people in the front seats through the dense smoke.

God, please. Don’t take him away from me.

“Raider!” I screamed, knowing he was in that truck. He was gone. God had taken him from me. “Raider!”

“Quinn, get away from there,” someone commanded—I thought it was Colt—from behind me, but with everyone else screaming and crying, I couldn’t tell who it was. “Quinn, the fumes are bad for the baby.”

“Quinn!” another voice was shouting at me. “Dammit, girl. I’m going to tan your hide if you don’t get away from that truck.”

“Quinn.” I thought I heard Colt yelling my name.

“Raider!” His name cut my throat to shreds as I screamed. My knees were starting to go weak, and I knew I was going to pass out. I couldn’t breathe. My heart had stopped beating, eviscerated with the explosion of Matt’s truck.

Strong arms came around me, taking all my weight as my legs gave out and I started to fall.

“Quinn,” a rough voice that sounded like Raider’s was at my ear, but I didn’t trust my ears.

He turned me around, and I looked up through my tears.

His face was covered in black ash, but underneath, I could see how pale he was. His breaths came fast, as if he had been running around. His eyes were glazed from the sting of the smoke.

But it was him. He was there, safe, holding me.

“Thank God you’re alive,” I cried, holding on for dear life. “I thought I had lost you. I thought—”

“I’m okay, baby. I’m here.” He kissed my cheek, then my lips. “I got you.”

For several moments, he held me as relief soothed some of the ache in my heart. I was shaking, but so was he. I had nearly lost him, but he was safe.

So, who was in the truck?

Without realizing what I was doing, I glanced over at the burning truck. No one could have survived that. No one.

“I was going out the door when the bomb went off,” he told me, following my gaze. “Tanner and Warden were in there.”

The relief at knowing Raider was okay disappeared at the loss of two men I had known all my life, who I had loved and considered family. They were both gone. There was no way either could have survived the blast that had rocked the clubhouse, let alone the flames that were now melting the vehicles closest to it.

The blare of the sirens intensified and, moments later, two trucks pulled into the compound. It was all a blur with the smoke and everyone running around, but the sight that caught and held my attention, that would haunt me until the day I died, brought tears to my already wet eyes.

Bash was holding Matt back as he tried to get to the burning truck where his brother was still inside. Bash, the big, mean looking president of the Angel’s Halo Motorcycle Club, had tears streaming unashamedly down his face as he fought to keep his cousin back.

“He’s gone, Matt. He’s gone.”

“No!” the younger Reid shouted, the sobs in his voice breaking my heart all over again. “He can’t be. He can’t be, Bash.”

“He is.” Bash kept his arms around Matt, not letting go for fear of the other man doing something stupid, and to comfort him.

“I’ll gut those motherfuckers!” Matt roared. “I’ll gut them all!”

“We’ll get them. I swear to you, we will get every last one of them.”